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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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redmonster Hitting really hard ground
  • replies: 1

Hi all. Like many others I've suffered depression for as long as I can recall. Back as far as 3 or 4 years old I realised after attending an in patient program for 3 weeks where I learnt about shame based development. First major anxiety attack at 17... View more

Hi all. Like many others I've suffered depression for as long as I can recall. Back as far as 3 or 4 years old I realised after attending an in patient program for 3 weeks where I learnt about shame based development. First major anxiety attack at 17 in 1987 frightened the life out of me and have continued intermittently over the years. To add to this I had a unfortunate sexual experience with a member of extended family around 6yrs old which has played which has played havoc with my sexuality since falling into a nervous breakdown due to some drastic activity by my wife around club funds in which our family were members of. Social fallout, major stressors on myself, immediate and surrounding family also the collapse of a major part of my business due to me being affected by rapidly worsening depression and a huge tax dept via my wife misappropriating my BAS payments created the spiral. On that as mentioned above, I experienced uncomfortable feelings re- unwanted same sex thoughts. These were not an issue or regular pre becoming unstable, therefore never needed acting on. I have been married for 12 years and been happy with heterosexual intimacy. However since the intrusive and ruminating thoughts accelerated around my breakdown and in recovery it feels as though my mind is split, rupturing my pre breakdown confidence and being thrown in disarray when the depressive effects are overrunning my ability to deal with life in general. Things such as financial, family and marital issues have become extremely stressful and confusing resulting in suicidal thoughts at times. But, I have periods where I gain strength and clarity amongst the manic episodes where by things aren't obsessively ruling me and I am able to moderate and contend with the irrational guilt & fallout of the whole experience. I have been suspect of Bipolar or BPD due to struggles over the years in consultation with practitioners, but right now really need aid in getting out of the dangerous level of depression. Meeting with Physiatrist this Thursday to consider med change or more. First post so sorry if not appropriate in any way. Just needed to take some pressure off my current support network.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

tamray Not sure what I'm feeling :(
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I an new to the forums and am looking for advice. My wife has pointed me to the website and would like to share how I am feeling. I am not sure if I am depressed or not. I am married with 3 kids, a decent job which doesn't cause me any stress... View more

Hi all, I an new to the forums and am looking for advice. My wife has pointed me to the website and would like to share how I am feeling. I am not sure if I am depressed or not. I am married with 3 kids, a decent job which doesn't cause me any stress and am financially stable. However, I do not care about anything at the moment. Family, friends and my job. Nothing in my life excites me or makes me happy. i am angry all the time and yell at my wife and kids whenever I talk to them. The smallest thing will set me off. I'm drinking more than I should to probably numb my existence and this in turn causes massive issues in all my relationships. I have no close friends due to being grumpy and this in turn makes me sadder than ever. I have been to the doctors and been prescribed pills but they made me feel more distant so I don't want to do that again. I feel guilty over the things I've done in my life that has hurt others. This guilt is tearing me apart. There is more but that's all I want to get off my chest for now. any advice or pointers would be great.

crackers14 Trying to avoid going back to hospital
  • replies: 16

hi i have depression and its not being treated at the moment and i feel like if it doesnt get treated soon ill go back to the hospitial which i dont wanbt to do . any advice is helpful crackers14au

hi i have depression and its not being treated at the moment and i feel like if it doesnt get treated soon ill go back to the hospitial which i dont wanbt to do . any advice is helpful crackers14au

Tess123 Going downhill fast.
  • replies: 7

Hi ! I am new to this site, but needed to talk to someone as I can not seem to stop crying, each day I seem to do less and less which makes me feel worse, but I dont know how to stop. I am 41 years old, very overweight, with two beautiful teenage dau... View more

Hi ! I am new to this site, but needed to talk to someone as I can not seem to stop crying, each day I seem to do less and less which makes me feel worse, but I dont know how to stop. I am 41 years old, very overweight, with two beautiful teenage daughters aged 17 and 14. We run our own sucessful business, which is very stressful, and also keeps hubby very busy. We have recently purchased a beautiful home set amongst 7 acres of gorgeous gardens ( I should be happy!) I am going through early menopause, which is probably not helping. My job keeps me fairly isolated, I do not get to connect with people much. I live in a small country town, where everyone knows everyone. It doesnt seem to matter how nice I am to people, I can not seem to make friends. I only have one friend, who has her own issues with a child with cp. Hubby and I love each other, but due to my weight issues, I vary rarely will be affectionate with him, because my body is so discusting to me. I have never been an intelligent person, and even though we run a successful business, I feel people warrant that to my husband, so I guess I just feel worthless. I am so lonely, so sad, everything anyone says I overanalyse and take to heart and spend days crying over. I get so angry at myself, because I have nothing to be depressed about. I have family who love me, a nice house, job. How would I cope if there was something seriously wrong? I feel ilke I am such a bad parent because my protective instints go overboard when other kids or parents say things about my children., to the point I hurt so badly inside, i cant control my emotions on the outside. My kids end up not talking to me and telling me whats going on in their life because they know I cant deal with the negative. I know I need to interact more with people, I did try a few weekends ago, I invited quite a few people to my house for a housewarming, and barely anyone showed up. I feel the more I try the more people dont like me. I have a daughter who is quite good at sports, and she receives a lot of jealous comments etc. I am at the point where I am bursting to say something to a couple of mothers and kids, but I know if I do , it will wreck things for her, but their comments just eat away at me. Does anyone have any ideas how I can find people who might connect with me, without to much more rejection, which I dont think I could cope with? Sorry for the long winded whinge!

LifemySide Detachment from everyday life
  • replies: 9

Wondering if there is any mums out there also having trouble doing daily routine things. I feel so alone and lifeless.

Wondering if there is any mums out there also having trouble doing daily routine things. I feel so alone and lifeless.

Tjm91 I don't want to seem like a sook or like I'm looking for attention
  • replies: 2

Ok, so I think I have depression and I don't know what to do next. It only really hit me recently when a friend made a comment and when I actually did some research I think I might have depression. Problem is I don't want to speak to anyone I know ab... View more

Ok, so I think I have depression and I don't know what to do next. It only really hit me recently when a friend made a comment and when I actually did some research I think I might have depression. Problem is I don't want to speak to anyone I know about it I don't want to seem like a sook or like I'm looking for attention-also the reason I don't want to see a doctor because I am scared they will say nothing is wrong with me and I'll never feel better. Im 24 and I have become so withdrawn. I used to be quite bubbly and outgoing but now I don't want any attention on me ( it's so bad I avoid pulling up directly beside cars because I don't want anyone to look at me). I am not excited about anything anymore and I can't see any future for myself and I am always so tired. To try and describe it I feel as though I'm stuck in a tiny frosted glass box, everything outside is blurry and everyone outside the box is going about their lives in fast forward and can't see me in there and have forgotten me. I feel like everyone is always annoyed with me. I've lost all my confidence I avoid eye contact with people and I just feel like it will never get better. Strangely though I get weird bursts of happiness/energy for about an hour at a time and then crash again. I don't feel connected to anyone anymore. My best friends/family feel like strangers. I want some honest opinions - do you think this is depression or just a phase? I've felt like this for about two months now and it just seems to be getting worse. Thanks - sorry for the long post

white knight Radical effort might help
  • replies: 3

My wife and I have different types of depression so this might not suit all. I felt depression coming on. Maybe I'm lucky but I get signs, mood swings and sadness. The sadness maybe from dysthymia. At any rate it as coming on 3 days ago. This cycle n... View more

My wife and I have different types of depression so this might not suit all. I felt depression coming on. Maybe I'm lucky but I get signs, mood swings and sadness. The sadness maybe from dysthymia. At any rate it as coming on 3 days ago. This cycle normally lasts around 10 days and I push through it. Last time about 6 weeks ago I couldnt push through it. This led to me approaching it differently. Instead of staying home I asked my wife if she'd accompany me for a drive about 5 kms away to collect firewood. We did that and it was so hard. All I wanted to do was go home maybe stare at the TV or sleep. We got our full trailer load of wood then out of the blue I stopped the car and told my wife I'll be back in 5 minutes. I jogged in one direction then returned. That was hard to do also. It's like running against the tide. When we got home my instincts were to - yep retire inside to TV. Instead I did some digging in the garden. Then went to my 'man cave' to rearrange shelf items. This is when I have a little cry. It was getting harder. Again I went against the tide and trimmed some tree branches. I didnt even enter our home for a drink as the temptation to collapse was too great...drank from the tap. Finally a lot of work behind me I was to enter our home then thought it best to visit our neighbour thus delaying again the resting time. Helped my neighbour with the building of his green house which took 2 hours. A couple of days later and I'm fine. I broke that barrier. Dont know if you can try this but its worked for me. It is hard though Tony WK

Gajas Depression like a fire - Sometimes it smolders, sometime it's an uncontrollable inferno.
  • replies: 4

I've been dealing with depression for appox. 40 years. It's everpresent, smoldering, then suddenly flaring into an all consuming feeling of loss, fear, approaching doom and dreadfully explainable loneliness. It's a pit so dark and deep no light can b... View more

I've been dealing with depression for appox. 40 years. It's everpresent, smoldering, then suddenly flaring into an all consuming feeling of loss, fear, approaching doom and dreadfully explainable loneliness. It's a pit so dark and deep no light can be seen. Noone can know what it's like unless they've been there, it's the most foreign of foreign places, you can't fully explain it to someone that hasn't been there and seen the sites. But, the misery passes and medication can help, it may take some searching until you find the right doctor/s and meds, but you must keep searching. My greatest regrets bought about by my condition is the pain l've caused to people that love and care for me. I hate my own self pity, l've seen some awful things, l've been directly involved in the accidental deaths of at least two people, one of them was a small girl. I'm here whining about how miserable l feel, l can't even begin to know the misery l caused the family of these people, accidently or not. Today l was asked to recall detail some of the trauma l've witnessed and its left me feeling empty and dead inside. I know it'll pass, but while it's here the pain is almost unbearable. Writing things down or talking is cathartic, it lets some of the mental pus out of the abcess l live with. Thank you for the oppurtunity to write this here and thank you for taking the time read it. It has eased the pain and settled the flames a little in the process.

Amy_G What does it feel like to feel "numb"?
  • replies: 4

I'm supposed to be like...noticing what I feel more and like getting in touch my emotions etc. but I don't think I really feel much? Like...I have reactions to things, e.g. we just got netflix and I was like "yes that's awesome" but I don't think I r... View more

I'm supposed to be like...noticing what I feel more and like getting in touch my emotions etc. but I don't think I really feel much? Like...I have reactions to things, e.g. we just got netflix and I was like "yes that's awesome" but I don't think I really felt anything physically in my body, it was just a thought? I think I used to feel more than that? Maybe? Idk? And one of my grandparents who I wasn't all that close to died and I was just like "I should act sad because that's a sad thing", even during the funeral I was just...fine? Like I didn't care? Usually I cry pretty easily, at least in sympathy with other criers, and my mum, sister and cousins were all at least sniffling and I wasn't even doing that? And I know when people are depressed sometimes they end up feeling numb, or they feel flat, or dead, or like they have no feelings, but I'm not all that sure what is actually meant by that? And usually I read about this being connected with losing interest in things they like which isn't what I'm experiencing... I still enjoy things, at least I think I do? Like I entertain myself, and there are still things that I like doing to fill my time. But then life doesn't ever actually seem worth living so I guess I'm not enjoying things that much, but I've felt like that for at least two years so that's not exactly a new thing...but I'm pretty sure I used to have a lot more feelings than this. I was sad, at least, and stressed. I remember that. Tbh I just feel really chill...like nothing truly bothers me, like I just don't care. But I'm kind of confused about this whole thing and I'm not quite sure what's going on here, so I was wondering what other's people's experiences were with having less or no feelings during depression? What was this experience like? Could you still be entertained by things? Could things still make you laugh etc? I'm not even sure what I'm really asking for here...just anything anyone can say that relates to anything I've written here lol - Amy G

Cloudydaze considered attention seeking - escalates guilt
  • replies: 4

I have differed clinical depression for 23+ yrs and every rpisode has pushed my husband firther away. I seem to blame him for all my failings when i get caught up in the blurred space between reality and depressed reality. I dont know how to bridgevt... View more

I have differed clinical depression for 23+ yrs and every rpisode has pushed my husband firther away. I seem to blame him for all my failings when i get caught up in the blurred space between reality and depressed reality. I dont know how to bridgevthe gap that just keeps getting bigger! He says he loves me but stands back and watches me slide further into the black hole! Any ideas?