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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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crankypants Hmmm, this IS difficult.....
  • replies: 10

Hi all. Didn't realise how hard it is to start off the first post! Obviously I am a newcomer to the site but thought I needed to try something. Why am I here???? Glad you asked. I am so over feeling upset and annoyed by things that apparently, should... View more

Hi all. Didn't realise how hard it is to start off the first post! Obviously I am a newcomer to the site but thought I needed to try something. Why am I here???? Glad you asked. I am so over feeling upset and annoyed by things that apparently, should not really bother me that much. I do not enjoy feeling this way so often, and I just wish I could be the happy me more of the time. I am sure my wife feels the same about this too. I do tend to get upset/angry when things go wrong, especially if I am unable to steer events where I either think, or know they should go. I have little to zero tolerance for frustration. Unfortunately my reactions are apparently not commensurate with the situation. I accept this is true. I do not get physically violent, but fail miserably to control my "verbal anger" when my frustration reaches a certain level. Unfortunately, my poor wife is the only other occupant of our house so she is the only other person that deals with this. She says that once a bad or annoying situation has been rectified, I simply go looking for another one. And she is right. Negativity is my constant companion. Has been for as long as I can remember. I make no real attempt at making close friends as I feel as though people see me as silly, annoying, loud (I am partially deaf so I do tend to talk too loud like you do when wearing headphones), not as successful as them and generally not "friend-worthy". Other than my years as a muso, I have no hobbies or outside interests as I feel everyone will be looking at me, for all the wrong reasons........even though there might be many other people there too....I am the one that stands out because I feel awkward, ungainly, inept or just plain stupid. And yet, put me on a stage in front of thousands and I am Mr. Confident. And I loved it for nearly 30 years. Go figure! Lately I have become, I am sure, almost too much to tolerate and my fear is my wife will soon say she's had enough. I just do not understand me. No confidence. Always seeing the negative. The glass is not only half empty, but it should be a bigger glass too. I have relatively good health, a wife that I love and trust to the moon and back, and she loves me dearly also. We are both employed and about to purchase another home together. We are certainly not rich but not struggling either. I find that my negativity to so much, frustrates me and cripples me and causes me to feel annoyed, therefore negative. Just one massive circle!! Am I unique??

Magyarok Hypocrite
  • replies: 6

My wife has jealously issues and is a control freak eg she hates it when i exercise as she's afraid that i'll be attractive to other girls. I'm often faced with ridiculous questions such as 'Do you love her?' and 'Do you wish you were with her and no... View more

My wife has jealously issues and is a control freak eg she hates it when i exercise as she's afraid that i'll be attractive to other girls. I'm often faced with ridiculous questions such as 'Do you love her?' and 'Do you wish you were with her and not me?' These concerns are unfounded, i've done nothing wrong and i haven't acted in a manner to raise concerns! It is her paranoia! We have an absolutely gorgeous 5yo daughter. My wife suffered post natal depression and our marriage was on the rocks and a couple of years back we almost broke up. Over the last 18 months i made a real commitment for change, i thought we were getting closer, i thought things were getting better so i thought! My wife's jealously issues continued e.g. two weeks ago i was interrogated by her because of a mutual work colleague who was flirting with me in front of her. I could understand her concerns you know beautiful 18yo girl throwing herself at me, it was flattering considering she is 23 years my junior but i didn't do anything to encourage this and i certainly didn't give in to temptation. But still i had to endure my wife's interrogation and repeated questioning and accusations. I can understand this! Then last week she had another jealously fit, this time because i provided a former female work colleague with info to help for a job interview. How could anyone possibly be jealous over that? I don't understand! But get this! I accidently found out over the weekend that she has been texting a former partner on a regular basis which has been going on for the last 18 months behind my back. I'm sure they're not talking about just the weather. She assures me that she is doing nothing wrong - maybe she is or maybe she isn't, i don't know! All i know is that she values his friendship! But the thing that really gets me is that her jealously outbursts against me was disgusting and unfounded and then i find out she has been doing this over the last 18 months when we were supposed to be working on our marriage! If the above situation was reversed i would be subject to all sorts of accusations and rightly so. But apparently for her to do this is perfectly acceptable, explainable, justifiable and i have no right to be concerned. So what does that make her? Her double standards sicken me and i have never felt so distant from her. The last 18 months have been i lie and obviously her interpretation of working things out is different to mine! Can't stand the sight of her Dave

MichaelMelbourne Doctors and Dysthymia
  • replies: 30

Hey Everyone, I'm Michael. I'm recently 19 years old. Basically ever since probably when I was around 14-15, I've had what I thought were bouts of depression every now and then, and other than that, nothing else too bad. However, I've come to see tha... View more

Hey Everyone, I'm Michael. I'm recently 19 years old. Basically ever since probably when I was around 14-15, I've had what I thought were bouts of depression every now and then, and other than that, nothing else too bad. However, I've come to see that this whole time, I've had a mild form of depression, punctuated by those occasional darker moments. In reading about depression, I came across Dysthymia which seems to hit the nail on the head. I decided to take the plunge and see a doctor about it. I guess I didn't have the same great experience with doctors that people seem to have. It's not that she didn't believe me, but I felt like I had to talk myself up a bit around her. Make it like my symptoms aren't as bad as they are. In the end, she recommended I do a Medical Action Plan and then do psych sessions. Should I do this? They are all really expensive ad I don't know if I want to. Towards the end, short of diagnosing me with dysthymia or depression, she commented that she thought I probably just had a generally more melancholic/ darker outlook than most people so it might not be anything, which worried me a little. Anyone had a similar experience? I really think I know what I have, but the Doctor doesn't seem to be on the same wave-length... but then again, she is a Doctor and I'm not. I'm a bit lost. Should I see another Doctor to double check or stay with this one?

Dennis38 Stuck between a rock and a hard place, and for I freely admit that this is my doing...sortof
  • replies: 12

Ok well of late been doing pretty good managing myself and my depression, doing DDP Yoga, riding a bike all in the name of getting rid of my walking cane (and man getting fit hurts!!). Well along comes my nephew in law and his wife and they moved in,... View more

Ok well of late been doing pretty good managing myself and my depression, doing DDP Yoga, riding a bike all in the name of getting rid of my walking cane (and man getting fit hurts!!). Well along comes my nephew in law and his wife and they moved in, they got kicked out of the place they were living in because of the fact that it was being sold (not to mention they lied and told the land lords/real estate people that they only had 2 dogs when in fact they had 6 dogs, 3 cats and a few birds). Well it happened faster then they were ready so I said they could move here, once they got rid of most of the animals especially since the wife and I already have one dog. Anyways, the kids (and the "kids" are 40 and 39 but really they are still kids in my eyes which I am only 39 lol) moved in, for a temporary place while they look for a new place to live. Well come to find out the Nephew in law's wife is in stage 5 kidney failure and needs to be on dialises and needs a new kidney. They have been trying to find a new place, well sort-of trying, The kidney people said she needed another address closer to them (they were living in Bathurst and that is where the kidney doctor is in) in a month's time. NO way in hell will that happen so I told the kids to relax and they could stay here until everything gets properly sorted. As she has to go in ASAP to have the dialises set up soonest (surgery and all that). So once again doing the right thing turns around and bites me in the ass. So now I have 5 dogs, and three adults living here. My wife is menopausal and lashes out a lot of times before she can control her mouth, which means I am the one that gets the lashing. This does not help my depression one bit especially when I lash back at the wife then I feel like I am a total heel because I should be in more control then she is, this will not rip myself and the wife apart I know that, but ugg it really is putting me once again in a black mood as I try to keep the peace. Why is it that when we do the right thing it always bites us in the ass or is that just me? Last time I did the right thing by not sueing the lady that ran me over it just got me over 250k in debt a shattered body and mind.

CMF Anxiety vs depression - what's worse
  • replies: 2

I suffer both anxiety and depression on and off and have for years. The last few weeks I've had depression and the last few days anxiety and sometimes both. I find anxiety harder to cope with. If I'm depressed I can cry or just sit and do nothing unt... View more

I suffer both anxiety and depression on and off and have for years. The last few weeks I've had depression and the last few days anxiety and sometimes both. I find anxiety harder to cope with. If I'm depressed I can cry or just sit and do nothing until I can pick myself up and hopefully feel better but anxiety, the sickness, the fear, the constant thoughts going around - it's debilitating, there's no relief . what do others think? Do you find one easier to handle than the other?

Sam85 What is this that I am feeling?
  • replies: 1

Im very new here and not sure where to start. My usual personality is sarcastic, funny, silly, happy, hardworking and social. Im married to a wonderful man of 10 years and have two daughters. I'm not sure what happened but on Boxing day 2014 I just r... View more

Im very new here and not sure where to start. My usual personality is sarcastic, funny, silly, happy, hardworking and social. Im married to a wonderful man of 10 years and have two daughters. I'm not sure what happened but on Boxing day 2014 I just remember something changing. We were away visiting family interstate and I went from wanting to be there to demanding that we had to go home. I didn't want to be there anymore and felt miserable. I ended up spending the reminder of the holiday in my room either asleep, crying or angry. This was the start. Its now February and nothing has changed. Things I once loved I have lost interest in. I feel so completely and utterly overwhelmed with my responsibilities as a mother and a wife. I feel as though one little thing has to go wrong and it will fester in my head and will make me feel nuts. I am restless at night and have a lot of trouble sleeping. I cry randomly for reasons I cant even verbalize and have withdrawn completely from social situations. Coming up with any excuse to avoid interaction. I get get so nervous about new situations that I make myself feel ill. I have no support from anywhere with my children and am so unappreciated in my life that I feel nothing but resentment towards others. I want to go to bed and do nothing everyday. I used to be able to get up at 5am everyday and go work out. Now its an effort every day to do anything. I have a husband, two daughters, loving family and a best friend. Not one of these people has picked up on any of this as I feel I can still hide this well. Husband does night shift and isn't home much to see and everyone else is so wrapped up in their own problems no one can see me crashing slowly. Im not sure if what I have is depression or if Im just sad. But I need to talk to someone and no one in my circle is ready to hear this. Im scared to go to my GP. I dont want to go and have him tell me its all in my head.

Fritz_Montgomery Sick of the Black Clouds
  • replies: 10

Hi - new to the forum today. One of those days that just is worse than usual. Just feel the need to talk to someone - have suffered for many years - still on medication given up on seeing a counsellor as over the years have done so - on and off - jus... View more

Hi - new to the forum today. One of those days that just is worse than usual. Just feel the need to talk to someone - have suffered for many years - still on medication given up on seeing a counsellor as over the years have done so - on and off - just seemed to make no difference and in the end felt like they only cared if you keep coming back and paying your fee. Some days it would be nice if those around you just took the time to say - How are you? and actually showed some compassion. Feel very alone and pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I can not be helped and my life will always be with black clouds hovering over me Sorry to put this out there - but just needed an outlet to try and get though the rest of the day

globalbizz 55, No Jive And Life's Taking A Dive
  • replies: 6

Hi I'm male, 55, employed in a job I don't particularly like and feel depressed more than I should. Second marriage, with 4 kids 22 - 30 (2 each). I feel empty. I feel as I don't fit. I can be outgoing but in social functions unless I make the move, ... View more

Hi I'm male, 55, employed in a job I don't particularly like and feel depressed more than I should. Second marriage, with 4 kids 22 - 30 (2 each). I feel empty. I feel as I don't fit. I can be outgoing but in social functions unless I make the move, I'm usually left on my own. Even when I am in situations, people tend to leave quickly to find another group. Maybe I'm boring but I do ask mostly about the person I'm talking to. I thought that made people...happy and that they would think I was ok. Sometimes it doesn't feel that way. I am in real estate; now a corporate gig and no longer selling. My colleagues are ok and so are the agents except for a few which I dislike with a passion. There's no room for growth and no prospect to earn more money. Money is a big part of my depression. I have a house in a street I hate because of my neighbours. It's full to the brim with debt because myself and wife blow our credit cards sky high. I can't ever see myself getting out of debt. Servicing the debt takes up the majority of my income. I pay my credit cards then use them to live during the month. It's a vicious cycle. No mun equals no fun. I struggle to do things but sometimes do by loading up the credit card or getting another one of the premise that one day all will be good. It never comes. I'm a Lotto addict at about $80-$100/mth. I'm anxious about no meeting my financial commitments especially where children are concerned. My 2 kids (22 & 28) are prime for engagements, weddings soon and I wont be able to contribute a cent. It depresses me greatly. I've tried extra things to make money. Mostly network marketing and have failed for the last 20 years. Virtually no return. I've tried selling on Amazon,eBay etc - all with no success. My latest brain child is book writing. I'm starting fiction writing after non fiction has earned me $100 in 3 years. My weight is 123kg - about 30 kg overweight. My doctor tells me that I've gained 15kg over the past decade. Ten years ago I lost my Mum having said goodbye to my Dad. I got an inheritance after I sold the family home. Within 18 mths I blew it all; not intentionally but nothing was left. The money I sunk into the house has all gone to credit card debt. I'm lost. I don't know where to turn to. I've hesitated coming here thinking that I'll be sharing and listening to guys with dramas. Broken people can't fix broken people. Am I wrong? Is there REAL help here? Thanks for reading

Annie79 Overthinking and exhausted
  • replies: 1

Not sure where to start. But I have had depressions for 20 years. Been on meds most of that. Problem is I constantly battle negative thoughts and over thinking I am currently going through marriage counseling and this came up My husband was shocked t... View more

Not sure where to start. But I have had depressions for 20 years. Been on meds most of that. Problem is I constantly battle negative thoughts and over thinking I am currently going through marriage counseling and this came up My husband was shocked to hear this I explained that I am constantly thinking and hard for me to switch off so when I can't wind down that's why Not sure why I am posting this but just wanted to say it Not sure what to do

Wizman31 Getting Better, but am I really?
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for a number of years and in July last year was hospitalised. I have since then been taking my medication religiously, talking to psychologists, psychiatrists putting into practice the co... View more

Hi everyone. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for a number of years and in July last year was hospitalised. I have since then been taking my medication religiously, talking to psychologists, psychiatrists putting into practice the coping strategies and feel that I am slowly getting better, so why am I having daily thoughts of suicide???These thoughts are stronger now than when I was at my lowest! Please has anyone else had the same?I am booked to see another psych this week.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.