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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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sqzr Need short-term advice
  • replies: 9

I need some short term advice; should I find a counselor where I am right now or head home and find a counselor there? I am on a road-trip 'holiday' currently in Hervey Bay. It's a long story but I essentially decided to sell my place, quit my job, t... View more

I need some short term advice; should I find a counselor where I am right now or head home and find a counselor there? I am on a road-trip 'holiday' currently in Hervey Bay. It's a long story but I essentially decided to sell my place, quit my job, take the cash and just go on a road-trip up the east coast in hopes of finding somewhere to disappear to and maybe find a job but really I'm just wandering aimlessly. I've made it from Sydney to Cairns and now heading back down south. I've just given up, I'm sitting in a holiday park cabin and I'm literally struggling to move out of bed. I'm struggling to do everyday tasks right now. It's ludicrous and embarrassing. I don't want to sound like a drama-queen or stupid but the best I can describe is that I literally cannot bring myself to leave the cabin, to search online for jobs locally, to walk to the bathroom. I am feeling literally empty, not happy or sad or suicidal, just completely empty and given up. As dramatic as I sound, this is literally how I feel and I cannot bring myself to do anything. Is this depression or something. It would be great to know what the hell is happening to me right now and what I should do?

sami Lone Wolf
  • replies: 1

I had depression for many years after losing my parents, I had several disasterous relationships including a marriage that was devastating. I fled my marriage with nothing, changed my job, got a dog and started to rebuild my life. As silly as it soun... View more

I had depression for many years after losing my parents, I had several disasterous relationships including a marriage that was devastating. I fled my marriage with nothing, changed my job, got a dog and started to rebuild my life. As silly as it sounds having my dog really helped lift my depression (I really worry sometimes about how I will cope if I lose her one day as I adopted her as an older dog) and while I am aware it can always come creeping back in it is nowhere near as intense as it used to be and I feel content most days now. What I am unable to do however is to form another relationship, I have no friends, family or partner. I tried to date but really just don't feel up for it, everytime anyone expresses any interest in me I just bail out afraid of coping with what could just become another emotional rollercoaster. I was always in relationships from 17 to 40 and I don't mind being on my own now, I have been alone for four years now and I have my pets and feel safe and settled, I'm afraid if I let someone in it will disrupt all the harmony and peace I have created, I feel like I am still in the process of rebuilding my life and finding out who I really am and what I really want. I don't have family and only one or two acquaintences, no real friends. I'd like to make a few friends but don't trust people much and seem to get used and treated badly by people I try to befriend. The last two people I have tried to befriend have borrowed money or items from me and not returned or repayed them, I just feel used so now I don't even bother trying. I love my pets and I run, swim, cycle and go bushwalking and sightseeing but everything I do I do alone. At work I get along with most of the people I work with but my field is male dominated and the only other female I work with is a really unpleasant person so I don't get along with her so have no female friends, just a few male acquaintences. Sometimes I feel a bit sad that I am so alone and have noone to 'shoot the breeze' with so to speak or talk over issues or see a movie or go out to dinner with but then I remember all the pain and turmoil and think I am better off safe and at peace. I wonder if how I am is okay, everyone else seems to have to have lots of people about and I don't. I'm not sure anymore if the way I live is healthy for my state of mind or not as it seems just normal to me now to be alone with noone and cope with absolutely everything on my own?

Stilloutthere Depression and anxiety after drinking
  • replies: 14

Hello all So on the weekend I had a family get together, which I brought my gf to. I love her dearly. After a couple of glasses of wine with lunch, I secretly went to the garage and skulled two bottles of wine. When my gf asked me what was wrong I li... View more

Hello all So on the weekend I had a family get together, which I brought my gf to. I love her dearly. After a couple of glasses of wine with lunch, I secretly went to the garage and skulled two bottles of wine. When my gf asked me what was wrong I lied and said nothing was wrong. I said I hadn't been drinking. I never lie other then when I drink and feel ashamed. Ieffectively abandoned her at my family get together, and she had to drive me home. She can no longer trust me when I am drinking, and I feel a have really betrayed her. I have historically been an alcoholic, and probably a drug addict. Now I hardly drink, but feel like I want to about once a month to check out from the world. I have changed my life incredibly, I meditate, go to gym, and engage with the world in a much more healthy manner. This slip up has made me feel very poorly about myself, especially how I lied to my gf and family. I regret my actions, and feel depressed and anxious about life in general.

150lashes Terrified of going back + No confidence
  • replies: 13

I've been struggling with depression and anxiety and over the last week made a big turning point where I am feeling a lot better. My thinking is clear I'd say about 85% back to normal, I'm eating and drinking properly and have kicked the alcohol. How... View more

I've been struggling with depression and anxiety and over the last week made a big turning point where I am feeling a lot better. My thinking is clear I'd say about 85% back to normal, I'm eating and drinking properly and have kicked the alcohol. However I feel terrified of going back to where I was and I feel like I'm desperately clinging on to how I feel now as I'm afraid if I let my guard down I'll slip back to the black wave I also have no confidence whatsoever. The fire I'm my belly to achieve and get out there whether it be work study or otherwise seems to be gone. I lead a simple life. I get up of a day go for a refreshing walk or bike ride, do some cooking, catch up with friends for lunch, do school pick ups, after school activities, take photos of the sunset and other scenic shots. Finish the day with a good meal, a good book and repeat. That's all I seem to be interested in. But I have mortgages, responsibility and a good career - I can't understand how I have no desire to do anything about this. Any suggestions? Is this normal?

Jess_bee Crying for help.
  • replies: 3

Tomorrow i am going to a beyond blue fundraiser for my friend who died last year. I wanted my partner to come with me enjoy the day out and most of all support me because i am falling apart. My kids are what make me get up each morning, if it weren't... View more

Tomorrow i am going to a beyond blue fundraiser for my friend who died last year. I wanted my partner to come with me enjoy the day out and most of all support me because i am falling apart. My kids are what make me get up each morning, if it weren't for them i don't know where i would be. Im crying out for his help and his closing the door. I cant keep doing this.

saviourseth how do you keep going ?
  • replies: 4

Hi. I am a 44 year old female who has been diagnosed with depression for 20 years. I have been on and off meds over the years and tried numerous drs also. No luck really. It never goes away. It's just some days I cope and a lot of weeks I don't. Most... View more

Hi. I am a 44 year old female who has been diagnosed with depression for 20 years. I have been on and off meds over the years and tried numerous drs also. No luck really. It never goes away. It's just some days I cope and a lot of weeks I don't. Most days i bite my lip and carry on. Recently i am finding that harder day by day. I have had recent relationship issues and broke up with a partner of 10 years and am now with an old partner who i have recently discovered is an alcoholic. Last week I was made redundant from my job and yesterday i found out my mum has 6 months to live. That tunnel of blackness seems to have no end in sight. Its hard enough to cope under normal circumstances and now i feel like i am terrified of every new day. So much so that i dont want to go to bed. any tips?

Tammie84 When you prefer being alone
  • replies: 15

Hello! I suffer from depression and anxiety and feel so lonely. Up until recently I've realised that for a long long time I have preferred being by myself. I would rather be at home watching movies or meeting with a friend. I have no motivation to ge... View more

Hello! I suffer from depression and anxiety and feel so lonely. Up until recently I've realised that for a long long time I have preferred being by myself. I would rather be at home watching movies or meeting with a friend. I have no motivation to get out there. I had really bad anger outbursts with my family and I wouldn't talk to one of them if I felt that they hurt me. I would become angry when things trigger other things and would feel like no one cares or understands me. I would then feel guilty for putting my problems on them. I am a private person. I don't like people knowing things about me. I can remember being depressed from when I was maybe 10. It wasn't until I was about 19 that I remembered that I was molested as a child. I realised why I was always scared of intimacy, I told a boy that he can sleep with me but he can't touch me. I wonder if I will be alone forever.

BBUser10 Help! need to find a way to stop myself being nasty when down
  • replies: 16

Hi all not posted for awhile as things have been ok , not great but better. my main issue at the moment is that when i start to have an episode (which is happening now) i start to let my mouth run away with me.... i cant seem to stop telling my wife ... View more

Hi all not posted for awhile as things have been ok , not great but better. my main issue at the moment is that when i start to have an episode (which is happening now) i start to let my mouth run away with me.... i cant seem to stop telling my wife all the bad things i am thinking and how i think she does not love me or support me, then that turns into to her getting upset then turns to arguing... i cant seem to get this under control and she does not know how to deal with me when i'm like this .... she asks me what she can do and to be honest i dont always know myself..... i seem to want to bring people down to feel like i feel and knowing that make me feel like a bad person :-(... this usually ends in us not talking to each other and she just walks passed me when im sat on the bed (i spend alot of time in the bedroom when down) and that makes me feel like she doesn't care. also i have to really try and stop myself (this doesn't always work) from just telling her i want our relationship over . i presume this is common fight or flight response ... does anyone else act almost nasty when down ? how do i control my mouth ? i have thought about going away when this happens, but it's not practical as we have young children and i take them to school . my wife is in a no win situation if she leaves me to it i resent her for not comming to 'help' me if she comes near me sometimes it helps but sometimes i lash out and she feels that she can do no right. i hate the fact my depression in time will end my marriage, i exercise for 1 hour a day , i have lost weight all these things have helped as i do not need meds anymore (or at least its manageable) but this nastyness is really affecting her Cheers Martin

Lost_andconfused Feel like ive wasted my youth
  • replies: 4

Im 26 and i feel like ive just drifted past my youth without inventing myself into the person i was suppose to be. My parents made every decision for me and im so lost with no sense of personality. Ive felt like i do what is expected of me and im jus... View more

Im 26 and i feel like ive just drifted past my youth without inventing myself into the person i was suppose to be. My parents made every decision for me and im so lost with no sense of personality. Ive felt like i do what is expected of me and im just sick of it all. My father is abusive and disregards my life. He makes a shitload of money and makes me feel guilty for taking his money. I know im just feeling sorry for myself and i have no one to blame but i just cant help feeling so bad for myself im 26 and ive done nothing for myself.

Hopefullseeking Better, but not
  • replies: 24

Hi all, me agian. I have been seeing a psychologist for the past 12 months as well as my normal psychiatrist, (she felt her alone was not enough) and have made improvements. but. I feel at times that I am not getting anywhere. Yesterday was a typical... View more

Hi all, me agian. I have been seeing a psychologist for the past 12 months as well as my normal psychiatrist, (she felt her alone was not enough) and have made improvements. but. I feel at times that I am not getting anywhere. Yesterday was a typical example. I met two friends for lunch and it went well, I felt ok and was able to enter into the conversation rather than sit back and say nothing, which I use to do. I cracked jokes and the others laughed so that made me feel good to. Then I went home and feel flat, I was teary, panicy and felt hopeless about my recovery. (I love my little flat and my cat so being home is not the problem and I do like my own company). I seem to have come some distance towards recovery which hasn't happened in many, many years. I feel like there is something wrong with me. Do others go up and down like this in one day? I suppose I want to know if I am alone in this or is it normal. Thanks BBers Anne