Depression

Depression anxiety long term and managing in the workplace

replies: 4

Hi all, I have been a sufferer of depression anxiety ongoing on and off over the last ten years or so. i the last couple of years I have started a career and I have been in my current job 2.5 years. I had a bad episode last year and took some time of... View more

Hi all, I have been a sufferer of depression anxiety ongoing on and off over the last ten years or so. i the last couple of years I have started a career and I have been in my current job 2.5 years. I had a bad episode last year and took some time off work. Work related stress may have also been a contributing factor. Now my work is wanting to contact my dr. I have not disclosedmi am a sufferer. They are also saying I have a "pattern" of excessive absences. What at do I do. How do others manage this ongoing. I don't want to give up my good job or earning potential ongoing but I am hesitant to disclose to be discriminated against or seen as a liability. I want to manage my leave and now I am feeling better, but with my condition I cannot promise it will not happen again in future. Am I doomed to a life of excessive leave or lower paid jobs/ part time employment. What is the answer. Interested to know if anyone has found ways to negotiate this with their employer which work. Someone give me some hope/advice.

Seeking guidance - return to work.

replies: 5

So I started a new job and within the week I was having horrible panic attacks and feeling depressed. I had taken myself off my medication about 6 weeks prior to this episode. The doctor puts me back on the meds and gives me one month sick leave. In ... View more

So I started a new job and within the week I was having horrible panic attacks and feeling depressed. I had taken myself off my medication about 6 weeks prior to this episode. The doctor puts me back on the meds and gives me one month sick leave. In this time I have been found to be anaemic and am being investigated for reasons for this. I also have contracted another cold despite being (mainly) away from society and having spent all of January battling a nasty reoccurring sinus infection. Now I am approaching the end of my sick leave and I am still suffering fatigue and have a poor immune system. Furthermore, a big side effect of the medication for me is insomnia. Anxiety and depression still having 'those days' but generally under control. I spoke with my manager and my options are to come back to work in a week and I was warned I would need to hit the ground running, or have another month off and come back when it is less busy and I could potentially ease back into it. I got the idea they would prefer I come back 100% - no fatigue/issues with my immune system, however the con is that I continue to miss work and fall further behind. I do not want to let the team down if I come back to work and am not performing well/need to take further sick leave, however I am feeling ready to return to work. Just a little lost and am wondering if anyone has some wisdom...?

New user, feeling overwhelmingly depressed

replies: 6

hi, I am new to the forum, I actually came across it when I typed into google 'why do i hate myself so much' I'm the crankiest mum and wife, I despise that about myself at the moment... I want to be happy and loving again. I sometimes believe I sound... View more

hi, I am new to the forum, I actually came across it when I typed into google 'why do i hate myself so much' I'm the crankiest mum and wife, I despise that about myself at the moment... I want to be happy and loving again. I sometimes believe I sound like my father who would constantly put me down and would yell and scream at us as kids, because he was so anxious we would get the blame for all sorts of things, I sound exactly like that, then when I calm down, nice mum appears for 10 minutes because I feel terribly guilty for my kids, then sad stroppy me appears again. I'm always in tears when no one is around I am depressed yet again, but I feel I have anxiety more so this time around. I really don't want to resort to medication as the first time was horrendous. I know what I can do to help I.e a walk a day, healthy eating, friendships, but do not have the care or energy to do this. Sorry for the sad long post.

All kind of going down hill

replies: 3

Hi everyone, I'm at a point where I don't know what to do anymore and how to find my purpose in life? There are things I enjoy, but I have no motivation to get out of bed. I quit my job, lost my friends (because of anxiety and depression) so now it's... View more

Hi everyone, I'm at a point where I don't know what to do anymore and how to find my purpose in life? There are things I enjoy, but I have no motivation to get out of bed. I quit my job, lost my friends (because of anxiety and depression) so now it's all getting worse. i have a partner who is a chef so he is barely ever around but when he is I have my moments and he never understands but makes me feel so small. I don't know to explain myself anymore? I don't know what to do anymore... no job, no friends....nothing I'm just in my early 20s also I feel like everything is just so wrong I would love any possible help lots of love, goalstosmile

When will I feel like "me" again?

replies: 3

Hi guys, Ive been feeling so disconnected, emotional, sad and frustrated with myself. Ive been going through some anxiety tagged along with some mild depression and the healing process is getting me down because im not where i want to be. and often w... View more

Hi guys, Ive been feeling so disconnected, emotional, sad and frustrated with myself. Ive been going through some anxiety tagged along with some mild depression and the healing process is getting me down because im not where i want to be. and often wonder when i feel like me again. Theres been an emergency in my family a couple of days ago and naturally this has triggered my anxiety ("oh no what if that happens to me") which sounds selfish when i read it out loud, but thats what ive been thinking to the point of creating my own symptoms. So that coupled with the sadness im feeling for my family member has been very hard for me. Im trying to be strong for them (thankfully they are pulling through now) but im also trying to be strong for me too. I schedule my motivation but i feel myself treading water somewhat this week. I constantly ask myself, when will i feel normal, when will i feel "right", when will I feel like me again... am I losing my mind? My eyes watering even writing this. Im going to the gym and exercising at least 3 days a week, i eat well, i have support but this current situation has pushed me back a few steps. Any words of encouragement and familiarity to the situation would be really helpful right now. Thanks BBB (Beyond Blue Buddies) Faithh

Depression and people's expectations

replies: 17

I've been living with depression for a few years, it has been made worse by a lot of traumatic things happening this past two years including losing my mum to cancer, my partner becoming addicted to ice then cheating on me and losing my gran just to ... View more

I've been living with depression for a few years, it has been made worse by a lot of traumatic things happening this past two years including losing my mum to cancer, my partner becoming addicted to ice then cheating on me and losing my gran just to name a few;seriously my life has been like a horrible movie, I didn't think so much could happen to me at one time. I have always been the bubbly, positive and strong person and I feel like now that I'm not, I still have to pretend to be because people expect me to be. I no longer want to reach out to people because in my head I think that creates more expectations such as the expectation to get better etc. It's so stupid and it's my issue, I know that my family and friends are there for me but I just want to be alone or just be with my pets. What am I doing? I'm pulling away from everyone because when I'm alone I have no pressure on me to be anyone or act a certain way. Why am I doing this?

Depression and concentration

replies: 4

There is not much worse a feeling that having what l call a "scatter brain". The term isnt meant to be derogatory, but in fact accurate. When my depression was at its worse 1992-2009,l had extreme difficulty focussing on the job at hand. My mind woul... View more

There is not much worse a feeling that having what l call a "scatter brain". The term isnt meant to be derogatory, but in fact accurate. When my depression was at its worse 1992-2009,l had extreme difficulty focussing on the job at hand. My mind would wander and this had consequences. Flying a model airplane you need 100% concentration. I often crashed and other modellers wondered why. I'd also fall into an emotional low bevause of it. Mind overload, burnout, stress,all leave our minds in a state that feels like we've lost half of our capacity to think. We have to come to terms with this massive change to our lives. That's the hard part. To claw back our thinking/concentration ability we need to drop off other unwanted cargo we can do without. Eg friends that are taxing...takers that dont return the goodwill. Be kind because they often have no clue they are takers. Drift away if possible...less drama...the aim is to lessen your drama not create more. Finances. Get them in order. Years ago my wife revamped our bill payment methods. We now do a lot of monthly direct debit. We buy power when we get our power account in surplus. Etc Health. We grow vegies galore. Our carrots always twist but are great for juicing. Cherry trees great for prevention of gout. The vitamins must assist the mind. Fresh is best. Exercise. At least 20 minutes of fast walking will result in the dropping of your blood pressure then it will rise again. Its best for a fit and healthy cardio vascular system. More oxygen for the brain. Check with your GP as to what is advisable. Relaxation. Everyone has their own technique. For me its finding a place near home amongst forest trees where l can listen to pan flute music or my favourite Youtube Maharaji Sunset. It feels like l create empty mind space once l do this. Our minds need time out. Laughter. A good comedy lifts my mood. Prioritise. Focus on one thing at a time. Distractions. My wife and l came to an agreement. If she talks to me and l raise my hand, she knows I'm concentrating on my bb forum. She also knows l will give her attention within a short time. Some of us dont have the capacity to divide our attention to several things at once. We might not be able to focus well, to counter our scattered mind, but we can make changes to move aside some obstacles to give our mind space to think better. Less clutter. Have you got ideas on how to focus better? Tony WK

I just dont get why I do this

replies: 3

We once drove 12 hours for a 2 week holiday my wife and 2 girls, when we arrived at lunchtime all was good. At 3pm I was in the car on my way home alone. My wife and girls continued there holiday and ended up flying home when the holiday had finished... View more

We once drove 12 hours for a 2 week holiday my wife and 2 girls, when we arrived at lunchtime all was good. At 3pm I was in the car on my way home alone. My wife and girls continued there holiday and ended up flying home when the holiday had finished and I picked them up from air port. We flew in to Tasmania for a 2 week holiday and day 1 was excellent on day 2 at 1030 am I was by myself on a airplane flying back to Brisbane. Guns and Roses concert I left before they came on stage, I got to see the cover band, My wife paid $1500 to meet and greet kiss and have a fans lunch before the concert, I got there early and 10 mins before the actual event was suppose to start I took off like a rocket and went home. My friends and extended family call me the great Houdini, I am an escape artist if I am at family or friends house it not unusual for them to find me missing, I could quietly slip away unnoticed and just go home without telling a sole. At the footy with friends they were waiting for me to return with drinks, I was heading straight for the train station and went home. I was a star football player 1st division captain and best and fairest at half time one day I just jumped in my car still with boots on and just took off home. Grand final day again I am 1 of the better players everyone dreams to play in a grand final, I did not show up I sat at home on my own in my bedroom. Grand final day number 2, after the siren I kicked a goal to win the game by 3 points it was the biggest win and celebration this club had ever seen, I did not turn up to the club that night for awards, dinner, party, No matter where we are I will eat dinner stand up rinse my plate tidy my area and nobody says a thing they just no I have finished and I am ready to go home. I don't rush or hassle anyone else I will always get my own way home or return and pick up my wife and kids up. I will answer people if they talk to me but if they get to talkative I will get up and leave, my kids don't seem to annoy me I can handle there noise, arguing, winging and demands but anyone else don't even try. I hate appointments and times I have an appointment today, I am already sweating, worried, in a panic it annoys me having to go out I am starting to get angry.

A Beyond Blue Depression

replies: 3

Beyond Blue, down and out, ashamed, embarrassed, confused, alone, sad, angry, scared are some emotions people who suffer depression go through, crying, soar, tired, fidgety wanting to be alone and sometimes wish weweren’t here at all. Feeling helples... View more

Beyond Blue, down and out, ashamed, embarrassed, confused, alone, sad, angry, scared are some emotions people who suffer depression go through, crying, soar, tired, fidgety wanting to be alone and sometimes wish weweren’t here at all. Feeling helpless, feeling worthless, feeling a burden and left wondering why life is so cruel. Little things can seem like a major task, getting out of bed, picking up kids, doing shopping, it all becomes just too much, when the phone rings what do they want, no thank you I am busy, I don’t feel well, I hurt my leg, I have a headache, I have an appointment are some excuses I use, I really don’t need company or to be around people I am ok. We all can relate to the ones we love and care for who try to encourage us to get out, participate and get over it, we have all heard, once you get there you will be fine, give it ago, you never get out loosen up. Sometimes it is necessary and seems appropriate to create and force a fake smile trying your hardest to be natural and enjoy a happy moment is an effort. Talking to people can make us feel weird, it’s not that you are not valued or liked but in our head our reply feels unnatural and fake because it’s hard to focus on what has been said,sometimes people who have been there can explain best, I live it, I have lived it and without experience it’s hard to give advice or understand what its really like, you can read books and study and have all the medical degrees but to live a day in the shoes of a person with depression is what you need to get the full scope of what it’s like. I guess some see us weak but each day we live and try to deal with this is the strong approach, it’s never easy and always tough, each day we hope we wish we have good intentions that it will get better but as the sun goes down and comes uphere we go again. I wish there was a way to make me happy, to live life, to be able to smile, to have friends, to go out and be normal we all want that. All of us have friends, we all have a lot of people who have our back and some good strategic plans, we are club of our own we are Depression Club we stand for support, help and being there for each other, it’s not shameful it just shows we are pretty cool and we really care. When your turn has come and you have the help you need and are back on your feet, don’t forget depression club. We can beat this and have a better life, hang in there and keep up the fight. Thank You Beyond Blue and Thank you to the Founder Mr Jeff Kennett

my bed, my head and I

replies: 1

Bang Bang bang loud symbols are what I hear in the back of my head, Bla Blah Bla Blah Bla is what I thought you said, you ask me this and you ask me that honestly Im not interested in any of that crap, I get you are trying to be nice, and help me see... View more

Bang Bang bang loud symbols are what I hear in the back of my head, Bla Blah Bla Blah Bla is what I thought you said, you ask me this and you ask me that honestly Im not interested in any of that crap, I get you are trying to be nice, and help me see things I can achieve, but right now just leave me be, I want you to know I don’t mean to seem mad I still have feelings and bleed and hurt I am just a little sad, I am a tough person and once was very talented at Kung Fu the way I feel Now it would be a struggle to tie my shoe, I understand it appears I am lazy and seems I am always in bed the fact is if I had no place to hide id most likely be dead. I can handle a hello and I like 2 mins of your time but when you get excited and go on and on its time for me to fly, Its rude not listen or have interest in your friends but when I am listing I just struggle to comprehend, I certainly aint stupid and I am certainly not dumb but when my head is spinning everything and everyone is a pain in the bum, people look at me and occasionally stair, for their sake I pray they don’t poke the bear, my anger is getting out of control, sometimes I can go off my head like an absolute @@@ Hole, To look at me I am fine it is possible some lady’s would find me divine, What people can’t see is the struggle inside my head that’s the reason I am always in bed.

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Depression anxiety long term and managing in the workplace

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Seeking guidance - return to work.

replies: 5