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Depression

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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Lollie45 Always exhausted
  • replies: 18

I am always bone tired, no energy to do anthing that I like doing or need to do. All my good energy gets used up at work being kind, caring and 'happy'. The well is dry by the time I get home. My kids are suffering from me being disengaged and are la... View more

I am always bone tired, no energy to do anthing that I like doing or need to do. All my good energy gets used up at work being kind, caring and 'happy'. The well is dry by the time I get home. My kids are suffering from me being disengaged and are lazy and unhelpful because why shouldn't they be, what kind of role model am I? My housework is suffering and it just makes me more dispondent. I have all these good intentions and ideas going around in my head but I am just so tired. Blood tests are all normal. I am on medication but it doesn't help, never has. I have had depression to various degrees for 13 years. I used to be so organised, houseproud, go getter and enthusiastic about life. Now I just exist. I have done cognitive therapy and meditate sometimes and write in a journal sometimes too. I just can't seem to get out of this fatigued funk.

anonymous175 Lacking direction
  • replies: 13

I have felt myself slipping for sometime now. Unfortunately this is part of the course of suffering from Bipolar. A few things have triggered this slip: relationship troubles with family members and friends, a sense of loss & being alone and lacking ... View more

I have felt myself slipping for sometime now. Unfortunately this is part of the course of suffering from Bipolar. A few things have triggered this slip: relationship troubles with family members and friends, a sense of loss & being alone and lacking direction in my life. Today I feel really sad and can't seem to get out of bed even to do my beloved daily walk. I just want some respite from toxic relationships, negative feelings and some direction. Any constructive advice would be welcome.

Sharny No room for this illness
  • replies: 7

Hi, I'm prompted to write due to a recent disclosure I made to a friend regarding my illness. Just over three weeks ago I decided to let a friend in on my anguish just by discussions over lunch. My intentions have always been clear, hiding my illness... View more

Hi, I'm prompted to write due to a recent disclosure I made to a friend regarding my illness. Just over three weeks ago I decided to let a friend in on my anguish just by discussions over lunch. My intentions have always been clear, hiding my illness and people pleasing to cover up. Not so long ago I noticed a decline in my mental health and I've made some changes necessary to help myself. I feel hurt, confused and let down to say the least because I let a friend in on my illness and it has not been received very well. I've always hidden beneath appearances ( not proud of it) when out with people I appear well dressed and my house is always kept well and styled beautifully. I mix in a circle of middle class Melbourne women most of which have husbands like mine in well paid careers. I don't know if there is room for my illness? Like it or not, I have it. I revealed my illness because I was telling a friend I need to slow things down for my health. She asked why? I don't know why I let her in on it but I really regret it because I feel she lacked any basic understanding or compassion, horrible experience. Cutting a long story short, I feel this illness and any mental illness not just bipolar, is cruel and misunderstood. The ignorance shown by my friend has left me gutted. This is a woman who not so long ago commended me on my achievements, always came around with her kids for a swim, long BBQ's in summer by the pool offering compliments on my knack of entertaining and cooking. One week after I told her my history and that I've let some of my own care slide, she hops on social media insinuating via different memes etc about my particular illness. Childish, cruel, ignorant behaviour I was not expecting left me feel cold, isolated and confused. I hope she has not shared what I disclosed. Ok, so a bit of a fall out, I'm a grown woman why does this bother me? It bothers me because no one with mental illness should have to hide, it's the worst outcome. How can a person go from being in my life for so long to just treating me like nothing? Thank you for listening. Sharny.

Ellmo Layers of meh are starting to weigh me down
  • replies: 2

Lots of 'low-level' frustrations in my life are contributing to feelings of disgust, disappointment and sadness. I'll try to list briefly. And whilst these issues in isolation are managable to overcome, I feel that everywhere i turn i'n faced with th... View more

Lots of 'low-level' frustrations in my life are contributing to feelings of disgust, disappointment and sadness. I'll try to list briefly. And whilst these issues in isolation are managable to overcome, I feel that everywhere i turn i'n faced with them, which has me feeling overwhelmed & hopeless. I had my first child 15mths ago. I've wanted another baby for almost a year. Hubby is beginning to agree that it's time for another baby, but doesn't seem enthusiastic about it, making me feel like i've beat him down. All my friends are trying too, so i feel pressure to compete (i have no idea why!) and also happy/sad feelings for my family & friends who have recently announced their pregnancies (4 close people around me). I wish it was us, yet I also have the feeling of cold feet & fear as we are finally getting more sleep (still deprived, but better) and I don't know what to do with my body. I used to be a gym junkie (which kept the blues at bay), but I feel frustrated that I can't find motivation to go to the gym. My husband has been amazing & taken i er cooking, but makes unhealthy food, despite my constant comments & requests (selfish, right?!), but I hate cooking, so i have to eat it. I have tried to eat healthy but my husband doesn't, and i just don't have the strength or willpower to continue, which makes me feel weak. I hate myself because I eat junk; I eat junk because I hate myself. I've expressed this to hubby (in tears) several times & asked for help. He says yes, then in the next breathe suggests KFC for dinner the next night! I miss feeling fit & strong & happier. Lastly, work. I returned in July & hate my job. I constantly feel like I'm drowning, yet instead of working harder to get on top of it, I distract myself with internet & drinking coffees because I feel so overwhelmed. I've asked for help but been told to work it out. I need this job for financial reasons & to get maternity leave again. I find myself struggling to keep my frustrations & feelings of shitfulness to myself. Hubby has noticed & gets angry back, despite me telling him all of the above. He basically warned me not to get fired then retreats every night to his man cave shed & i waste every night staring at the tv or phone by myself feeling trapped & frustrated. I don't know how to solve these problems. Logically it's 'grow the hell up & deal with your shit. Stop slacking, get some willpower' But I don't know how to go from here to there (the way i used to be).

spunkyturtle I am useless and worthless
  • replies: 4

So I found out I could apply for remission of HECS debt due to special circumstances, mental health. I applied to 6 Universities and 4 Universities refunded a total of $27,800'of HECS debt. 2 Universities have refused to refund the last $16,000 so a ... View more

So I found out I could apply for remission of HECS debt due to special circumstances, mental health. I applied to 6 Universities and 4 Universities refunded a total of $27,800'of HECS debt. 2 Universities have refused to refund the last $16,000 so a law firm took my case pro bono and we are taking them to the AAT. After months of pain stakingly building a case and going over how pathetic my existence has been I was basically told today because my psychiatrist and psychologist wouldn't help and provide a report, money is more important after all, the case has nothing much to base on because well medical documents mean nothing, the department of education have now lawyer end up so my lawyer is expecting them to be ruthless. Gee, I feel like a useless, worthless piece of trash. Stupid me, I thought I had legal rights, but I don't, what a waste of time. Next time I think I have legal rights I'm going to lock myself in my room and drink u til the thought passes.

Aqua-blue Scared and Confused
  • replies: 2

Hi all, This is my first post and I don't really know where to start. I was first diagnosed with depression when I was pregnant with my first child, 10 years ago. I believe however I have always had depression. I don't think it was particularly a nat... View more

Hi all, This is my first post and I don't really know where to start. I was first diagnosed with depression when I was pregnant with my first child, 10 years ago. I believe however I have always had depression. I don't think it was particularly a natal thing. That just happened to be when it was diagnosed. Over the years it seems to have become progressively worse. I have been on numerous medications but they only seem to be effective for a short time and then I need to go onto something else. I am frightened it is just a vicious downhill spiral. I have a loving family but I am afraid I am pushing them away. We have moved several times, trying different places to try to help me. This doesn't work, I can't escape my own head. I am self employed in a competitive, cut-throat industry and disappointments really knock me about these days. I have put a lot of my heart and soul into my work for 20 years but I am really suffering from burn-out now and I seem to have nothing to show for it. I don't have a saleable business and I have no super. I worry that I will become homeless and that my family will leave me. That might be an exaggeration and a figment of my own mental cloudiness but it feels like a very real scenario of where my future is headed. Over the last 15 years my husband has been made redundant twice. He has found it particularly difficult both times to find employment again. Age is not on his side and he feels it. He is very supportive but doesn't know what to do for me. My kids are also very supportive but they are young and I feel this is not a good thing, or a fair thing for them to endure. I hate the regime of testing a new drug and the associated therapy. It seems to work for a little while but has never had any long-term benefits. Each time I am back on the downward spiral, it's harder to come back. I feel like a petrie dish. I would love to be drug free and to just be able to manage this awful debilitating thing that is sucking the life out of me.

BBUser10 Hunger games has help with my depression
  • replies: 3

Hi just wanted to share something positive that has/is helping me determine if my mind is playing tricks or not . i watched the lastest in the hunger games movies recently and there is a scene in it were Peter ( recovering from being brainwashed and ... View more

Hi just wanted to share something positive that has/is helping me determine if my mind is playing tricks or not . i watched the lastest in the hunger games movies recently and there is a scene in it were Peter ( recovering from being brainwashed and poisioned) ask Katniss (who he loves but has been told in brainwashing not to trust) if she can help him trust her again by asking her questions when his mind is playing trick on him. The game is called real or not real I have adopted this whenever my mind tries to sabotage me into thinking my wife just puts up with me , it's working really well I just say things like ..."you think I'm weak and a bad dad ? " REAL or NOT real .. She answered NOT real (phew) this answers my fears and it so quick there is no arguments i encourage anyone who has not seen the movie to you tube it cheers

Small_Inside It's the stupid thoughts and self-doubts that get you.
  • replies: 4

I was having a good day today - my day off work - when I got a text message from my supervisor. I felt like he was accusing me without checking all the facts, so I wrote back, being somewhat defensive in the process. Probably too much so. As soon as ... View more

I was having a good day today - my day off work - when I got a text message from my supervisor. I felt like he was accusing me without checking all the facts, so I wrote back, being somewhat defensive in the process. Probably too much so. As soon as I had done it I felt that, even though I was justified in my feelings, I had done the wrong thing, that I would regret it. Then my supervisor called to talk to me about what I'd written. And somehow, despite there being apologies, I still feel that I have been accused, that I get no points for trying, that I've let people down (again), and that I will never be able to do my job properly (or any other for that matter) no matter how hard I try. And I feel upset that I put so much stock in how other people think of me. Do you ever have those days where you don’t like the person you seem to be? Where you feel guilty for your thoughts and feelings and opinions? Where expressing them makes you feel worse rather than better? Because you don’t feel you’re the type of person you SHOULD be. And you realise how pathetic the self-pity party is but you can't seem to stop it. I just want to be a person I can be proud of and I feel like I’m failing. Today is not the darkest of days for me, but the stupid thoughts just won't quit. They keep going round and round in my head and continue to make me feel cruddy, ruining my day. And now I realise I'm rambling and ranting and I feel like I shouldn't be making a mountain out of a mole hill. After all, there are way worse things happening in people's lives that make this look insignificant and ridiculous, right? Never mind, just ignore me.

JustMeOverHere Depression Relapse
  • replies: 4

Hello everyone, I have been dealing with depression since I was 11 or younger. I have severe anxiety, severe emetophobia, depression, and im an unstable and stressed first year uni student. But in all seriousness, I have maintained my strong persona ... View more

Hello everyone, I have been dealing with depression since I was 11 or younger. I have severe anxiety, severe emetophobia, depression, and im an unstable and stressed first year uni student. But in all seriousness, I have maintained my strong persona and will for the better of my family as I am the only out of 3 kids that suffers bad mental illness and they are unsure of how to help or are uncomfortable about the subject and don't understand. I live away from home at my uni campus but travel home every 2 weeks as I get majorly home sick within a day. My friends don't really understand me either and tend to just say "yeah that sucks" to everything. I was great for a while during last term but began a relapse and i was praying it was not a full relapse but with the way I feel more recently, I knowit's here for a while. I just really want someone out there to say they know how I feel and that they understand that I need to cry 20 times a day, embarrassingly enough in public sometimes as it's too hard to keep together. I can't begin to think of suicide as my parents have spent all this effort on me and my mum's having a hard enough time with her family side that losing a child especially to mental illness would not be fair. So here I am, perservering, just trying to stay sane enough to survive enough to live. Thanks for reading