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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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SmiSal I feel angry all the time and prefer being alone
  • replies: 4

I feel like I always want to be left alone and I feel like screaming whenever anyone wants to engage in inane chatter or small talk. In a social environment I am always aware of other people and what they are feeling and simultaneously I'm always fea... View more

I feel like I always want to be left alone and I feel like screaming whenever anyone wants to engage in inane chatter or small talk. In a social environment I am always aware of other people and what they are feeling and simultaneously I'm always fearing their judgement and hoping they haven't noticed that Ive put on weight or noticed I've said something stupid. I come across as friendly and funny and kind. I care about other people and feel best when those around me are happy and content but if theyre not, I soak up all their negativity and it drains me emotionally. When I'm alone, I'm free of all these stresses and can read books, create art, engage in a thought provoking TV series or enjoy a wonderful meal. It is peaceful and I am happy. In our society however this is considered wrong and weird. Plus I'm a Mother and help my brother, ex partner and best friend look after their children so I am constantly asked to help and very rarely alone. Today I just feel like crying and running away. Am I suffering from some type of emotional disorder?

PsychoCybernetics Goal Seeking as a Tool for Self Help
  • replies: 10

As a thought experiment let's assume that we all have a goal seeking machine at our disposal. Let's assume that our brain is fundamentally a goal seeking machine. Now Let's put that hypothesis to a test. Let's take a brand new brain, one that has not... View more

As a thought experiment let's assume that we all have a goal seeking machine at our disposal. Let's assume that our brain is fundamentally a goal seeking machine. Now Let's put that hypothesis to a test. Let's take a brand new brain, one that has not been cluttered by any information at all, good or bad, a human baby. Well, almost no bad if we ignore the first encounter with other humans is to have your bottom smacked to make you cry because they love you. After that ridiculous encounter you calm down and start looking for food. Some people have called this instinct but this is as misguided as slapping your bottom. You goal is to get something to eat and is duly provided by someone who really loves you, your mother. Next, sometime later, you find yourself laying on your back in a crib with an interesting multicoloured mobile dangling over your head. You don't know what this perverse thing is so you decide to see what it feels like. But that's not as easy as you think. Your arms wave around, your fingers grasp at the air. You have no concept of the vast multitude of muscles to achieve your goal, you need help. Over time something in your brain, by trial and error, guides your hand and fingers to what you want. You have achieved your first goal. Well, second if you don't ignore your first one. with your mother, but that usually only happens when you are a teenager. After that ordeal, you learn to use that technique to achieve goal after goal. As time passes you want more and different things. And that something inside your brain always finds a way to get it for you, using whatever means you know of, sometimes using very inventive methods you aren't really sure where they came from. Now you have grown up and had many many life experiences and have gained a vast storehouse of knowledge. It was gained in every way that it's possible to gain knowledge. Much of it you don't consciously remember and a lot that you can't put into words, like how to ride a bicycle, but it's there nevertheless. It has a name it's called tacit knowledge. It is that tacit knowledge you will draw from for your self help. You only need a goal to bring it out. It's always worked in the past. Any ideas?

NewHope First Steps
  • replies: 2

Hello, I am going to be honest, it's taking every ounce of courage I can muster to write this.. and even more probably to hit the post button. I was diagnosed with depression/anxiety in my early teens and over the course of the years I've tried to ma... View more

Hello, I am going to be honest, it's taking every ounce of courage I can muster to write this.. and even more probably to hit the post button. I was diagnosed with depression/anxiety in my early teens and over the course of the years I've tried to manage it with a combination of talking therapy with various psychologists and more recently with anti-depression medication. A few years ago I was also diagnosed with the early stages of Multiple Sclerosis. Fortunately it has not impacted on my life too much and the prognosis of it ever doing so is relatively low, especially with the recent developments in treatments. To put my situation into greater context, I am hitting my mid 30's, whilst I ma married I have not achieved certain milestones expected by this age. I am struggling with my identity - who I am versus the mask I wear to hide the depression. However, the reason I am reaching out is because I am finding my old methods of coping when I feel that "black dog" of depression beginning to get the better of me are no longer working. I know logically I am not alone, that I am allowed to feel this way and allowed to ask for help... but we all know how it can convince you otherwise. I am trying to fight back, trying to believe I am not alone. I am posting this partly to prove to myself it doesn't control or define me and partly because I hope there are other people out there who can offer some advice. I need new coping methods to fend off the dark days. Does anyone have any strategies they use that work well? I used to write or play video games but I feel so tired, blocked and disinterested that these doesn't seem to help me anymore. And Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can help my husband, who is amazingly supportive, but need advice on how he's meant to 'help me, help myself'. I feel terrible because he feels so lost when I begin to shut down. I have no suggestions on what he can do because if I knew what to do, I'd be doing it myself (I do hope that makes sense). We share our thoughts and feelings a lot but he'd like to know if there is anything else he could do to help me more forward and past the down days/cycles. Thank you to anyone who has spent the time reading this. I appreciate it more then you know.

Fallon01 Depression and CBT
  • replies: 2

Hi, I was diagnosed with depression around this time last year and spent most of 2017 in therapy. I made some great strides and found my lows became less low and I was having more highs, which I hadn't realised were missing so much from my life (I wa... View more

Hi, I was diagnosed with depression around this time last year and spent most of 2017 in therapy. I made some great strides and found my lows became less low and I was having more highs, which I hadn't realised were missing so much from my life (I was diagnosed last year but probably should have been many years before that). I had a very long run of, as I've taken to calling them, good brain days where I've been on top of things and the occasional feelings of worthlessness or despair have been easily controlled. However, the past few weeks, without anything really changing in my life, I've found myself back in the hole I had climbed out of. I am that annoyingly familiar case of someone whose life is going well but still finds themselves crippled by depression. I'm happy in my marriage and my home life. My job is boring sometimes and interesting other times like most jobs and my hobby of writing is going well. I've won some competitions and joined a writer's group who reacted really well to me and my work. I have a novel written that's currently being manuscript assessed, which is admittedly adding to my stress as I wait for the report to come back so I can edit the book and try and get it published. But that stress is a good stress in the sense that I'm moving closer to a finish line. I haven't posted on here before but I thought that it might help me to see if anyone had any coping strategies for when those dark feelings hit and it feels like a weight has fallen on them that they can't lift off. I probably need to go back to my therapist but I find that his area tends to be talking about things rather than giving me strategies and I like the talking but I don't like the feeling awful afterwards without the weapons to fight off the feeling terrible. Any help anyone can offer would be much appreciated, and just to know that there are people out there who might read this and know what its like is reassuring. When you're fighting something this big it's nice to know there are other people who might know how to find its weaknesses. Thanks, Sean.

Chicken_Wings Can you ‘miss’ being depressed?
  • replies: 12

It’s been a while since I’ve had an episode of depression. This latest one has been a doozy. Ive been seeing my psychologist about my depression and anxiety all year so far and I mentioned something to her today which I wondered “does anyone else fee... View more

It’s been a while since I’ve had an episode of depression. This latest one has been a doozy. Ive been seeing my psychologist about my depression and anxiety all year so far and I mentioned something to her today which I wondered “does anyone else feel this way?”. What I have noticed is that after I have been depressed for some time, crying constantly, being really on edge and touchy, there comes a point where I don’t feel anything. It might just be for a day. When I feel this way I almost miss being depressed, because the feeling of crying is cathartic. It’s comforting and I know it. It’s a release for what goes on in my head. But not feeling, not crying feels strange and in that moment I miss being depressed. This seems to happen every time I have an episode st some point or another. Does this happen to anyone else?

Twixbar The world is flying by me and Im stuck here
  • replies: 9

Hi! This is my first thread - Im not really sure how it works and Im not really sure I know what I want to say. I am lonely and scared - Ive always surrounded myself with high achievers and in the past, that made me grow and better myself but now, it... View more

Hi! This is my first thread - Im not really sure how it works and Im not really sure I know what I want to say. I am lonely and scared - Ive always surrounded myself with high achievers and in the past, that made me grow and better myself but now, it just drowns me. I advocate for mental health and looking out for friends and family who are down but when it comes to myself I have no compassion. I cannot love myself - I feel broken and betrayed by myself. I feel like a failure - when one thing goes right, 20 things go wrong for me. Logically, I know my life is still pretty good despite my condition - I shouldnt be like this but I am and that makes me feel worse. My family don't understand how I am feeling and just tell me to get over it - every else has. But now I am on anti-depressants and can't control my emotions or motivation and I cannot tell my family. I have to lie about my expenses to see psychological help and get medication and I feel so separated from them, so separated from my high achieving friends who keep progressing with their amazing lives while im stuck here. The whole world is flying by me and Im just stuck here.

Nervouscss Bipolar and looking for guidance
  • replies: 2

Hi, I’m new here and I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar for about 6 months now although I was incorrectly diagnosed with major despressive disorder for the last 5 years. I also suffer from really bad social anxiety. I’m a 19 year old female and I strug... View more

Hi, I’m new here and I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar for about 6 months now although I was incorrectly diagnosed with major despressive disorder for the last 5 years. I also suffer from really bad social anxiety. I’m a 19 year old female and I struggle every day with bipolar even though I’m on 3 different types of medication to help get it under control. I can’t hold a job due to my mania being too intense and my depression being too bad so money is a serious problem for me. I was on Centrelink for study but I couldn’t continue studying because my brain is so dead I can’t stay focused on anything and it’s really hard for me to process information. The only time I leave my house is for doctor appointments and to see my psychologist. The only financial support I have is my mum and my boyfriend which they insist is fine but it makes me feel so helpless. I’ve got very few friends since finishing school and none of them know about my mental state. I feel like I need to get a job or study like everyone else my age (which my extended family members have rudely pointed out) but with my unstable moods and extreme anxiety about leaving my house, this feels practically impossible. I feel trapped inside my head all day every day. I wish I could see my psychologist more often but with my money issues, I can only see her once a month if I’m lucky because of my mental health plan. I’ve already tried going to my local mental health unit but the only thing the “psychiatrist” told me was to lose weight (I’m slightly overweight due to being on so much medication) and make more friends. I’m not confident in the public mental health unit anymore since hearing that. I was made to feel like this is all my fault and maybe I should just get over it which is physically impossible. I try to act as okay as I can around my mum as she’s already stressed enough about her work and the rest of my brothers. I have 0 confidence and self esteem even though I’m trying to improve my body positivity through exercising every day but losing weight isn’t going to help what’s going on in my head and I fear I’ve also developed an addiction for exercise and I’m very conscious about what I eat and how many calories I consume in a day. I’m really struggling with myself mentally and physically and I feel my life lacks so much substance but I’m so mentally tired all the time and it’s just so hard to try and stay positive. I’m constantly in a dull state and I really don’t know who to turn to anymore.

derpytwins I feel alone
  • replies: 1

One of the many problems i have in my day to day life is that i feel alone... i know i have family and teachers i can talk to but i don't feel like they are helping enough for me to be past it... it's very hard for me to feel happy but so easy to mak... View more

One of the many problems i have in my day to day life is that i feel alone... i know i have family and teachers i can talk to but i don't feel like they are helping enough for me to be past it... it's very hard for me to feel happy but so easy to make me feel unwanted, hurt, depressed... this is really annoying for me to where i just want to stay in my room and cry and sleep and don't get up for hours. i have been doing therapy for 2 years once a month and 4 months of group therapy every Monday Tuesday and Thursday. But i feel like it isn't working like since everyone else i have seen do therapy gets better and i'm not it makes me feel alone...

Merced Sex will suffice.
  • replies: 3

I’ve been suffering from clinical depression for a while now, but only recently diagnosed. The mental health nurse I had been seeing since I was 15 for things like anxiety and anger. I miss those days — At least I actually felt something. In the last... View more

I’ve been suffering from clinical depression for a while now, but only recently diagnosed. The mental health nurse I had been seeing since I was 15 for things like anxiety and anger. I miss those days — At least I actually felt something. In the last few months my mental health nurse had packed up and moved. I had only just started learning how to manage my depression with the aid of my MH nurss and was prescribed medication. I live in a rural area and allied health was a luxury which has now been taken away with nothing to compensate. I’ve been left alone to deal with this empty pit in my stomach that I was not ready to deal with alone again. I’ve explored other avenues, I kept at my medication until it ran out, but I felt no different on or off it. I refuse to go see my GP without allied health but find it impossible for me to unload 5 years worth of therapy on to someone new. I’ve tried getting high, which just left me feeling the same. To make a long story short, the only thing that has worked for me is sex. Or anything sexual. It’s only a brief feeling but when I have sex I actually feel something. Even if it’s regret, anger, sadness, happiness, whichever... It’s something. I’ve only recently lost my virginity September last year but find myself thinking about it all the time; wanting it all the time. For the record I don’t sleep with anyone willy nilly. I like to pick and choose who it’s with, I like the romance. Nothing more. I don’t care for the men I’m with and none of them care for me I hope. I feel like I’ve sunken myself into a pattern that I don’t particularly care for but I’m not in a rush to get out of. I’m still lonely and I still feel numb every other hour of the day. I don’t really know if I’m asking for advice or looking for affirmation or whatever, I think I’m just speaking out loud.

elegantDownfall I don't feel wanted in this world
  • replies: 2

Hi Beyond Blue Forums, I've been feeling rather down and very much unwanted by the people in my life. I feel like I'm always second-rate, used and will never ever be good enough for anyone. My friends and family are all very talented, high achievers ... View more

Hi Beyond Blue Forums, I've been feeling rather down and very much unwanted by the people in my life. I feel like I'm always second-rate, used and will never ever be good enough for anyone. My friends and family are all very talented, high achievers and aim for good careers and a solid future. Me on the other hand, I'm always supporting my friends dreams, encouraging them to take chances and feeling happy for them. I try my best to work hard and do well, hoping that one day I'll be able to shine and stand next to them. But I realised, no matter how much I try, how much time and effort I put in- I'll never be good enough for anything, I'll never be able to succeed and I'm just not going to have a future. My parents at home are supportive of me, but they don't see the whole picture. They kind of feel that if I'm well fed and have a roof over my head, then I'll be happy. I'm also limited to how much emotion I can show in my household. Since my family has always been very large and happy - with no one ever having a history of mental/emotional issues, they don't really understand how to deal with someone been upset or going through a phase of emotional breakdowns. Overall I just don't feel very wanted. I feel that my friends kind of have me there just for the support. They'll use me once and then kind of throw me away. I'm always second-rate in everything, I'll never stand out and I kind of accepted that I will never be special to anyone. I always feel isolated from this world, tired and really just want to give up.