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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Jaaaybirdd Was treading the edges of depression - now I’m pulled back under.
  • replies: 1

I was doing better; even though work was hell, I’d push through the day and focus on the positives. But this week is perhaps the worst I have ever had to deal with. This job has been turbulent from the start (November 2018), I went on 2 week stress l... View more

I was doing better; even though work was hell, I’d push through the day and focus on the positives. But this week is perhaps the worst I have ever had to deal with. This job has been turbulent from the start (November 2018), I went on 2 week stress leave due to work place bullying that my TL had said they’d resolve. That was in March. It is now July and it keeps happening. On my birthday, I got stood down from work due to a complaint from my bully, without hearing my side. (I still don’t know the incident I’m trying to defend myself of.) I’m still trying to process this situation, but it’s really thrown me back into that dark place I spent ages trying to drag myself out of. Is there something so wrong with me that I deserve the hatred and ire of another person? Because they’re making it easy to hate/despise myself. I know I shouldn’t, as the wonderful BeyondBlue Support Member I spoke to today had said, but it’s so hard when I’ve had to deal with this since I started this job. The work environment is so hostile, that 8 hours a day, I don’t get spoken too by any of my team members. At all. Not even for work purposes. A lot of people have told me, maybe I should just do my job and not worry about them, keep my chin up and brush off their comments and attitudes. I try, but it weighs heavily after a while of the same atmosphere day in and day out. the worse thing is, my TL said that they understand, as they’ve been in a similar situation- and then ignores or treats me like an idiot like everyone else. I have previously said to my TL that I was thinking of resigning because of my bully - and they came back with how much of a valuable team member I was and how everyone enjoys working with me, that my ideas are welcoming. But I don’t see that. Ever. I have a psychologist appointment tomorrow - hopefully I can stop crying and get over it. i just. I’ve had to pretend to my family that I’m not falling apart. I know they’re supportive and want to help - but, I feel myself shut down and pretend it’s all okay. And it’s not. Its not.

Hopsy Bipolar & Addiction Journey
  • replies: 1

Trying to do life with a broken emotional thermostat, where every feeling is magnified - it is extremely difficult. I understand now exactly where my Bipolar Disorder originated. Family history. I tackled my 20's by riding the moods & the rapid cycli... View more

Trying to do life with a broken emotional thermostat, where every feeling is magnified - it is extremely difficult. I understand now exactly where my Bipolar Disorder originated. Family history. I tackled my 20's by riding the moods & the rapid cycling with substance abuse & gambling. Isn't that normal? Truth was I was suffering & it held me back. My relationships were reflective of my illness & I never..ever let anyone close. The intoxicated me was everyone's best mate then I'd lie in bed for days at a time. So I continue this manic way of life & meet a woman that saw something in me, behind the my erratic behaviour. Happily ever after? Nope. After 5 yrs of marriage & a child I did improve alot but I still battled everyday to keep my head above water. We moved states, I thought a 'fresh start' would help me. I was wrong. The isolation & loneliness was detrimental & along with life pressures I regressed. I gave up. The 13-14 period I lost it. Alcohol abuse, porn addiction, rampant gambling & very grandiose behaviour. I was out of control & also out of the family home. I saw a doctor for the 1st time during this period. I sat and I cried for the whole appt. Broken. As it turned out it took some months of medication changes to land @ Bipolar. It was during this period I gave up. I $30K lost on a 2 day bender. Most would say, what an idiot. But inside my world at that time I didn't care if I lived to see the next day. And that is exactly what happened, I texted my estranged wife to say sorry, ready to end my life. Someone called the police & i was coaxed not to & taken to hospital. I got out after 3 weeks & on day 1 out I tried again. Another month in hospital followed by another month. Time changed me. I kept therapy going, I started to make small changes & looked after my sleep. Accepted & embraced my illness & my treatment plan. Got my family back!! I don't forget the feeling of the policeman talking to me in the back of the ambulance...telling me i can recycle my pain & make it work for me, don't give up & make sure your daughter has a Daddy. I'll never see him again, wouldn't know him if I ran into him - but thank you, i'll never forget. I write this to remind people they aren't alone & to also to encourage others that it is ok to have a voice, don't be ashamed. Also that I am as normal as the next person! Get help early, if you think something is wrong get to a doc. Love yourself. You're so worth it

MikeJames so ummmm i dont know
  • replies: 1

Ok, people look at me and see a well put together person who knows how to live life. I am intelligent, augmentative and imaginative. I help people all the time budgeting, planning and generally make there lives better. But no matter how much i help o... View more

Ok, people look at me and see a well put together person who knows how to live life. I am intelligent, augmentative and imaginative. I help people all the time budgeting, planning and generally make there lives better. But no matter how much i help other people i still feel empty, i still feel like i am hiding. I am always thinking "does this response make me look like an asshole". I'm always making sure i look good in others eyes. I suffer from anxiety as well which makes it harder. Always looking for others approval at work which makes me look weak. Even though im very large(im 186cm and 120kg). I've found the only time i feel normal and happy is when im drinking alcohol and I only drink on a friday night but i would rather feel great all the time. Is this a normal thing? I have tried Anti-Depressants and they all make me feel worse, but i guess I have only tired 3 of them, but i Hate drugs to begin with. I feel like I am rambling with no real point but i seems to be helping me. Thanks all I hope your having a good day :D.

layla09060 Recurring depression
  • replies: 2

I am 22 years old, and have always been ambitious. I've also been struggling with panic attacks and crippling bouts of depression since I was 9, however lately the depression seems so much more pervasive. Lately I've just had this really nagging sens... View more

I am 22 years old, and have always been ambitious. I've also been struggling with panic attacks and crippling bouts of depression since I was 9, however lately the depression seems so much more pervasive. Lately I've just had this really nagging sense of being a failure and a disappointment to others and largely to myself, I quit a job that made me very stressed and unhappy only to have the same feelings at the new job I'm at - I've already found myself taking "sick" days when I just can't get myself to stop crying and get out of bed, which of course just makes me feel worse and exacerbates my suspicions that I am in general a disappointment and burden. The job itself is less stress and the coworkers are lovely people, but I count every minute and am constantly struck with hopelessness and rushes of fear pertaining to my longstanding hypochondria (the past 6 months it has been fear of brain tumour despite having a clear MRI seven months ago). I have been constantly referring to my former aspirations, and almost lamenting my capabilities as they grew to nothing and I've not achieved anything that I am proud of. I also emigrated to Australia from Europe 4 years ago and have yet to form any friendships or relationships, which has been unbelievably embarrassing. Everyday is so awful, and I miss the times in my life where I could just breathe and not constantly feel as if I am working to survive and "get through" - thank you to anyone who read for listening.

Sondera Feeling lost
  • replies: 3

Hi there, I am new to this forum. I don't know where to start. Recently I have been overwhelmed by depression and anxiety. I have just come out of a very stressful job into a new job. Even though this job is much less demanding, I'm having a very har... View more

Hi there, I am new to this forum. I don't know where to start. Recently I have been overwhelmed by depression and anxiety. I have just come out of a very stressful job into a new job. Even though this job is much less demanding, I'm having a very hard time adjusting. I'm not feeling myself. I feel so empty and alone. I feel like I have no one to turn to, and that even if I did, no one would care. I feel alone around friends and family, and even when I am with my partner. I can't talk to anyone. At the start of the year I was so happy, and had so many things to look forward to. Now I feel like everything is an effort and there is no point in even leaving my room. I don't recognise myself anymore and it scares me. How do you cope with these feelings when they get too much? Thanks.

fred2018 Anyone else feel like they have cement in their brain ?
  • replies: 10

I am trying to see the funny side in my current situation and I'm finding it easier to write my thoughts down on the computer then when I'm talking to people face to face , dueto depression on its own and probably the colder weather, my brain feels l... View more

I am trying to see the funny side in my current situation and I'm finding it easier to write my thoughts down on the computer then when I'm talking to people face to face , dueto depression on its own and probably the colder weather, my brain feels like cement, brain fog some people call it but this feels more like a cement that makes having the patience to deal with getting a better phone deal an issue hah so I just gave up , I think thats what everyone has do when depressed or just frazzled just give some of your daily goals up because sometimes your brain has maxxed out hah. Anyways I am looking to start a new medication that will hopefully help with the cement until I have a magnetic brain treatment in a few months, I'm not allowed to mention treatments here yes ? Anyways would love to hear from other people who feel like they have cement in their brain , we will hopefully all get back to clarity.

violetrose Which website should I recommend - Beyondblue or YouthBeyondBlue?
  • replies: 2

Hello, My friend is 24 years old and suffering from depression. She is not interested in looking at any websites that have information after information of writing and is written in professional and distancing type of language. I was looking at what ... View more

Hello, My friend is 24 years old and suffering from depression. She is not interested in looking at any websites that have information after information of writing and is written in professional and distancing type of language. I was looking at what websites to recommend her and came across BeyondBlue and YouthBeyondBlue. I know that youthbeyondblue is recommended for young people up to 25 years old. but my friend is pretty much around this age. So would you recommend her looking at the youthbeyondblue website or the beyondblue website? What makes these two websites different? Is the information/content different or are they basically the same, but written in a more adult friendly way whereas the other website is written in a way that young adults would relate more to? I just wanted advice on this before bombarding her with too many websites which may dissuade her from trying to get better with her depression. Thank you so much.

DV_Arjay Long time no see ayy - depression and loss
  • replies: 1

Well where do i start... cliche I am here again which means im depressed again. Smoking and drinking every night. I left oz to come to Africa to fix my depression to join my family. I then got a lot better and moved onto bigger things. I spent a year... View more

Well where do i start... cliche I am here again which means im depressed again. Smoking and drinking every night. I left oz to come to Africa to fix my depression to join my family. I then got a lot better and moved onto bigger things. I spent a year in spain working as a teacher and had a great time. However my time was cut short as i was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Which turns out one of the symptoms is depression. Apparently i have had this for a few years and one of the major symptoms arose and gave me double vision and blurry vision. Went for treatment and had it corrected but i am now taking 5 pills every morning and night to fight the symptoms. Since i have come back to Africa and currently living in Zambia. 6 weeks later my father passed away at the age of 55 turning 56 in a couple months time... he had no prior medical issues and was the healthiest man i knew. Now i am completely lost for words as i don't know what to do with my life. We are currently deciding on returning back to oz and i have no idea what is there for me and for our future. I spend nights awake until 2am and hoping my dad will walk through those doors in the morning, telling us that this is all a horrible joke to see how we would react. But i know that he isnt coming back anymore because i watched him die on the golf course and when the doctors asked me to stop performing cpr as there is no hope. I watched his arm fall off the bed lifeless in slowmotion. And its the only image in my head i see when i think of him. That and his smile 5 minutes before he had his heart attack. I constantly think of how the doctor's could have done more. As i watch so many mesical shows. They could have used a defibrillator or maybe put him into a coma and solved the problem in SouthAfrica. But we were 200km from the airport and that was just impossible. I hate this country so much. It took my father from me and nearly killed my sister from poor doctors opinions. He was a true Australian Such a good man that helped people everyday. Life is not fair. now i am supporting my family and trying to hold back the tears every day. Cheers for reading

Phoebe23 Lost and Hopeless
  • replies: 1

I’ve only been on this earth for 19, nearly 20 y years. But with out a doubt, 2019 has been the worst year of my life. I’ve never been so depressed. I literally have no direction in life, no passions, no interests and I can’t help but compare my life... View more

I’ve only been on this earth for 19, nearly 20 y years. But with out a doubt, 2019 has been the worst year of my life. I’ve never been so depressed. I literally have no direction in life, no passions, no interests and I can’t help but compare my life to my friends and people around me. The start of the year I was so happy, I went overseas met family members I didn’t even know existed had the time of my life. Was about to start my first year at uni when I got back. When I got back I had an overwhelming anxiety and ended up dropping out of uni after the first week. I couldn’t commit to it, as I didn’t know if it was the right path and I really wanted to be at uni to make my parents proud and I know going to uni will give me a better life. After a gap year and then the following year (2019), dropping out I felt and still feel like a disappointment and failure. I can’t help it. I visited a GP (not my usual one, just a random clinic) told her about my concerns and I just didn’t connect with her she referred me to see a psychiatrist but I didn’t go. For the past month, I’ve been trying to help myself with researching courses, degrees etc for next year because I really do want to study, but I have no idea what to study. But everything I read I either 100% don’t like it or if I have the slightest interest in it I over research it and read all the negatives of the chosen career and then completely disregard it. My heart just feels so heavy and broken and each day is so hard to deal with. Even going to work is such a struggle now my boss wants me to start closing the store and I just don’t want to. I don’t feel capable or confident enough to do it but I don’t have a choice because it’s my only income and I’m only 19. Life right now just really sucks and my biggest issue is my lack of belief in myself and lack of interest with life. I honestly don’t see any hope anymore with anything and it’s just so sad because I was such a happy girl and had the world in my hands and now I’m just broken and lost all faith in life.

Only_the_lonely Being made redundant at 50
  • replies: 10

After six years working for a social housing firm, I have been advised last week that my position is made redundant. I was not consulted about this and following week they have taken my user access to the computer. I work remotely from home so I cont... View more

After six years working for a social housing firm, I have been advised last week that my position is made redundant. I was not consulted about this and following week they have taken my user access to the computer. I work remotely from home so I contacted my supervisor via text message. She advised me that they are giving me this week off to find work so login has been suspended. So having a positive approach, I have commenced applying for jobs during the time, but I cannot believe how they are treating me. To add to that, my supervisor advised me to keep the matter hush, hush! I have given my heart and soul to the organisation and I was the person responsible for transitioning the office from paper based to and electronic environment, trained staff, wrote business policies and procedures for management and even visited our remote offices and made lunches for staff members. Actually my general manager had a military background and he strongly believed in having meals together as a troop. Lucky for my limited cooking skills and access to a stove in the kitchen, I was able to knock out something for the staff. I feel disappointed on my bosses not to involve me in the process, let alone advise staff of possible restructure / job losses for staff. I feel let down by my boss but I place my trust in God that he will help me. I have a million dollor loan on my head and my wife works part-time to take care of our two girls. I feel unvalued as my bosses did not consult me. A letter outlining redundancy did not reflect on my performance, but lack of funding from Government office, but still I feel staff should have been notified. No doubt the managers knew how they were performing and that a lack of performance on their part would put the company's prospects at risk. From where I stood, I continued to give my 110% to my work commitments and assisted staff where possible. I never envisaged that I would be treated this way by the organisation I helped so much. I think staff loyality is not longer prevalent in society today. The days of staying in a job until you retired are long gone! Any advise you can suggest please!!

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