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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Djordat Alone, forgotten, saddend, no self respect, no motivation, totally disillusioned, outcast???
  • replies: 47

Hi, not sure whether this is the right thing to do? I have no one else to speak with, about how things are with my position. I know I have allowed things in my life to way me down, to the point where, I can not seem to see the way out. Some days are ... View more

Hi, not sure whether this is the right thing to do? I have no one else to speak with, about how things are with my position. I know I have allowed things in my life to way me down, to the point where, I can not seem to see the way out. Some days are better than others, I find great solace, in the animals in my life, of which are many, mostly wild. I seem to feel great empathy and sadness for the hopelessness, I see in all things around me, and take it on board. I try to help others of all species, and cant help myself. Once, I was the most trusting of all that I met, and gave of everything I could freely and honestly, only to be tossed aside each time. And still, I leave myself open to the users and the self indulged, blinded to there indifference, I accept there words and smooth ways. It's in disbelief, and distrusting suspicion that I thrive now, detached and isolated from all but nature, in that I trust. It's very hard to describe the way of things, but in this way I remain distant and detached, where it's safe. I still have to endure dramas and problems in my life due to commitments and responsibility's every day. I hide well my ashamed self, and put up a good front to all those I deal with every day, at arms length. A social life I have none, interacting with others closely none, alone in mind, alone in body, alone in spirit. Have recently been accumulating my rubbish around me on display, so as to remind me what I am. Sorry to burden any who read this with my silliness, but would like any comments, may be out of all the self analysis, other views and opinions or experiences may help me turn around this endlessness. I know I have much more to give in many ways, but cant get the pointlessness out of me!! With much respect and a kind heart, Thank You.

Devilmandan Lonely
  • replies: 1

Hey, I'm new on here but wanted to let people know what I'm going Through. I have just recently moved out of the family home to work On my mental health, and now it has created an even bigger Separation between me and my wife. It just feels like ever... View more

Hey, I'm new on here but wanted to let people know what I'm going Through. I have just recently moved out of the family home to work On my mental health, and now it has created an even bigger Separation between me and my wife. It just feels like everything I Do or say to her at the moment sets her off. I know I haven't been Very pleasant to live with at times but I am trying to deal with it This time and it's been hard. Will she forgive me down the track If I give her space or am I destend to be lonely. I do have two beautiful Teenage kids and they are very understanding of what's going on. They also can't understand why there mum is being this way either But I just tell them, she is scared and worried about me, Am I wrong?

Dan145 In the pits again
  • replies: 1

I'm new to posting here about my experiences, but this is my fourth or fifth year living with depression? (I think) It's been a pretty steady decline these past few years; to the point where these changes have been so gradual, that these avoidant/anx... View more

I'm new to posting here about my experiences, but this is my fourth or fifth year living with depression? (I think) It's been a pretty steady decline these past few years; to the point where these changes have been so gradual, that these avoidant/anxiety relieving behaviours (declining social things, social anxiety, over eating,(not good food either), over sleeping, over thinking, drinking (not too much, but drinking to get drunk nonetheless), have crept their way in so silently, that I feel like a 'new me' has come to exist. And now, its like one small part of me thinks 'hang on, what has just happened' (kind of like a house party that has gone of for 4 years straight, and you're now starting to notice the unsavoury types that have made their way in to your house). I've very strategically (and cleverly might I add) constructed a social circle around me that doesn't exist, so I don't have to endure socialising and enjoying things. This in turn develops deep anxiety within me, as i'm becoming increasingly aware of this passage of time that is quickly being filled with my inaction to do things I enjoy, seeing people I want to see, sustaining relationships in general. It truly has reached a point where me sitting around all day, watching videos and movies on the internet mindlessly as I quietly acknowledge the fact about how im wasting my life away in a digital world of never-ending entertainment and getting my dopamine hit, rather than facing my problems, has become my life (PS: if anyone has any good tips of overcoming YouTube/movie/internet addiction, because my impulsiveness tells me it is an addiction, I would really appreciate that) The fact that I have recently decided to quit my job as a primary school teacher without any idea of other things I want to do is also snowballing things right now. Teaching is something I love, but it feels that my nervous system is so shot that I cant even concentrate sufficiently, which is a must with school kids. My mind is clouded, I'm stressed about income, the fact that im cloudy about thinking about what I want to do flares up anxiety, which makes me clouded with anxiety rather than coming up with solutions (feedback loop from hell, if anyone has read The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***, great book ). I feel a general hum of confusion and career misdirection. I guess im just wondering if anyone else has been in a similar spot that I am right now, and if anyone could help a fellow struggler out, cause I am struggling.

Steve_San Seeking Advice/Help
  • replies: 1

Hi All I am seeking advice to deal with depression from this thread. The story goes I am currently seeing this girl for over two months now, I think she likes me but when I trying to ask about her feelings, the answer was uncertain. Only until very r... View more

Hi All I am seeking advice to deal with depression from this thread. The story goes I am currently seeing this girl for over two months now, I think she likes me but when I trying to ask about her feelings, the answer was uncertain. Only until very recently I found that she has been depressed for a while, I don't think it a major depression, but she doesn't feel attracted to anyone at moment and she wasn't at her best/her prefer states. Of course, I want to continue seeing her, even though we rarely have physical contact (I mean holding hands). I also want to help her get out of depression regardless of the outcome whether we will continue dating or not. Because I have little or no experience in dealing with depression in my life, I am here seeking valuable advice from the community. What should I do in this situation? She refused to go out (I mean like meeting other people), she told me she is having difficult thoughts like low self-esteem, stressed, and life in general. Please, if you have experience in how to help a depressed person or you been through the same state, leave your advice/recommendation. Thank you Steve

Kamilley Struggling
  • replies: 1

I’m new and haven’t really spoken to anyone about my anxiety/depression. I was diagnosed with PTSD/PND when my first child was born 9 years ago and after a short period on medication I came off it and tried to manage on my own. 9 years and 3 kids lat... View more

I’m new and haven’t really spoken to anyone about my anxiety/depression. I was diagnosed with PTSD/PND when my first child was born 9 years ago and after a short period on medication I came off it and tried to manage on my own. 9 years and 3 kids later and I am a total wreck. I’m an overthinker, have regular panic attacks that come out of the blue and alternate between angry/overly happy and super down very quickly. My kids deserve a happy, fun mum who takes them out places rather than a mum who panics if our routine isn’t followed or we are out the house too long. I have periods of time where I am totally numb to everything, like I have passed the panic stage and have just given up on everything. Social interaction at the moment is just in the too hard basket and I don’t have the energy to think about getting help. I would be happy just to crawl into a hole and not come out. and that’s me. I feel a bit better writing it as I don’t have anyone in my life that cares. Thanks for reading

Mr_Nate Who am I these days...
  • replies: 3

For 12 years until recently I was a carer for my now ex disabled partner doing everything for her, helping her in and out of bed, in and out of bed, on and off the toilet, cleaning and bathing her, cooking, washing, cleaning as well as spemding time ... View more

For 12 years until recently I was a carer for my now ex disabled partner doing everything for her, helping her in and out of bed, in and out of bed, on and off the toilet, cleaning and bathing her, cooking, washing, cleaning as well as spemding time with the kids and working for her father which didn't leave much time for myself. I ended up tired, depressed and was at the point where I didn't care anymore and wasn't looking after myself, lost touch of who I am, what I wanted in life. As I mentioned, I have recently moved out, still Depressed and suffering with Anxiety, gave up working with her father after the years of being treated like crap from him put-downs every day, verbal abuse and put-downs and dodging flying cups, plates and knifes most days, thing was getting pretty toxic. Now I am away from what I say was a toxic situation, I am still suffering with Depression and Anxiety, with not working and trying to live on Newstart which is $550 per fortnight and alot of free time on my hands I tend to think too much about things that's happened. I feel like now I away from that toxic situation/relationship I have lost touch with who I am, what I want in life, and being I have a low self-esteem and low confidence levels form put-downs and verbal abuse I don't know how to build up my confidence and self-esteem. What can I do? Where do I start? How do I find who I am again? I hate feeling depressed, I hate anxiety, I want to be alone alot of the time when I should be spending time with my new partner of near 2 months now

Marema Read this! It’s helping me!
  • replies: 3

I highly recommend reading “why we sleep” by Matthew Walker. the importance of rest and sleep just can’t be overlooked. I have just recently started antidepressants, after trying to manage without them for most of the year. I’ve been reading, and try... View more

I highly recommend reading “why we sleep” by Matthew Walker. the importance of rest and sleep just can’t be overlooked. I have just recently started antidepressants, after trying to manage without them for most of the year. I’ve been reading, and trying to prioritise healthy eating and enough sleep. also important and fascinating, helpful books are “good to go” by Christie Aschwanden about the science of recovery (focusses on the physical but does not at all overlook the intertwined nature of mental and physical being) ”can you die of a broken heart” by cardiothoracic surgeon Dr Nikki Stamp. also, how quickly can SNRI meds start to effect a person? Within days? Positively or side effects...

Litty Jobs and depression
  • replies: 2

My job is fast paced and there have been a lot of problems lately, I have tried to talk to my boss about them, he knows I have depression and he has not been very supportive. I don't know if my worries about work are anxiety or real. I keep breaking ... View more

My job is fast paced and there have been a lot of problems lately, I have tried to talk to my boss about them, he knows I have depression and he has not been very supportive. I don't know if my worries about work are anxiety or real. I keep breaking down in tears when talking to my boss and he has now fired me. I won't get a reference how do I get another job and stop this in future, help. Litty

Dougie A change for the worse?
  • replies: 3

Hey all, I'm new, and this will be my first time posting on any forum of any kind, so it does seem a bit strange. I'm a university student, just about to turn 21. I've had several injuries over the past year or so that have prevented me from exercisi... View more

Hey all, I'm new, and this will be my first time posting on any forum of any kind, so it does seem a bit strange. I'm a university student, just about to turn 21. I've had several injuries over the past year or so that have prevented me from exercising, and my girlfriend cheated on me as well. I don't really have any close friends; I've never really had any close friends. I saw a psychologist for the first time this week as my feelings of hopelessness and loneliness were beginning to be unbearable. I struggle constantly to display my emotions or to even feel anything. I don't feel comfortable talking to any of my friends about how I'm feeling or anything like that. I've obviously never been formally diagnosed with anything, as I've only just started seeing this psychologist, so even now I feel I'm being overdramatic. I thought going to the psychologist was going to make me feel better, but I feel far worse. I never talk about my fears or feelings to anyone and confronting them like that has made me feel even more hopeless and lonely over the past couple of days. What's happened to everyone else on the forum once they start asking for help. I feel more isolated than ever. Thanks for being out there whoever it is. Dougie

Gambit Is it my fault?
  • replies: 3

Haven’t posted here in a while. It’s not that I’ve gotten any better unfortunately, just forgot this account existed until I needed advice haha. For context, I met a guy online. We’ve been friends for a while now. In the beginning we were very close.... View more

Haven’t posted here in a while. It’s not that I’ve gotten any better unfortunately, just forgot this account existed until I needed advice haha. For context, I met a guy online. We’ve been friends for a while now. In the beginning we were very close. People would rarely see us apart, and if we were, they’d ask where the other person was. We would message almost constantly - he’d say good morning, I’d do the same, we’d talk on call for hours. Lately, it feels like things have changed. Recently he decided he wanted to start making videos. Having no knowledge of how to edit himself, I agreed to help. (I don’t know if that’s related to the issue, but context.) He made less of an effort to initiate conversation, and if we did talk over text, he’d be cold. And the only time he’d contact me was to ask about “our” work. He started to ignore me in game too, even if I tried to team up, it’d be met with dismissal. I didn’t address my issues at first, trying to avoid causing him trouble. I just let the thoughts intrusively fester in my own mind until, finally, I got fed up and confronted him. He reassured me things were the same, that I was one of his “best friends”. And for a little while I was at ease. He started to invite me occasionally, we would talk less about work and he’d initiate conversations. And then everything went back to how it had been. He’d ignore me, only text first to talk about work, reject me. I was back to feeling neglected and miserable. He’s so two faced, being cold over text, but charming on call. The back and forth is sending me on a roller coaster ride of emotions. I think deep down I know, he’s just keeping me around for his videos, that this isn’t good for me. But, if it wasn’t already obvious, I’m smitten with him. (Stupid, crushing on someone online, I know.) And like all things we love, admitting they might be bad for us feels almost impossible. At least for me. It’s not just my feelings hindering my judgement, I felt like with this guy I had someone I could confide in, trust. A real friend. Now it just feels like I’m being used and I’m too desperate for him to just admit the truth. Why is he so cold over text, but acts so warm over call? Why does he go from being affectionate - praising and encouraging me - to just ignoring me? One second he makes me feel like I’m on top of the world, and like shit the next. I don’t know what to do anymore. Sorry this got so long and rambley, I guess I just needed a place to vent my thoughts.