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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Youngmum2016 Feel like my kids will be better off
  • replies: 4

Hi I’m 23 and a mum too two little boys age 3 and 3 weeks old my first son has stage 3 autism and my second sub has hip dysplasia and clubbed feet tonight everything just got on top of me and I thought the kids will be better off without me and I was... View more

Hi I’m 23 and a mum too two little boys age 3 and 3 weeks old my first son has stage 3 autism and my second sub has hip dysplasia and clubbed feet tonight everything just got on top of me and I thought the kids will be better off without me and I was better off dead I’m sick of feeling this way someone help I’m in a hole I can’t get out of

Chica72 New here ... facing depression
  • replies: 1

Hi, I’m new here tho I’ve joined a while ago and just recently discovered I am depressed and I’ve suffered anxiety and panic attacks in my past. i have two adult children at home from first marriage that don’t work. Always full of excuses. my husband... View more

Hi, I’m new here tho I’ve joined a while ago and just recently discovered I am depressed and I’ve suffered anxiety and panic attacks in my past. i have two adult children at home from first marriage that don’t work. Always full of excuses. my husband of 8 yrs and I have separated, we have been trying to fix our marriage but it’s a struggle with my two lazy ones and his kids from first marriage who don’t like me for entering their dads lives. They are adults as well. im so depressed, I don’t want to do nothing. And I don’t want to get help in fear everyone thinks I’m a worthless mother, I have children with my recent husband. I have been put down by his family that it’s actually crushed me but I try to stay above the water.

LifetimeDreamer Communicating effectively with person that is depressed
  • replies: 1

Hello, I would very much appreciate your advice. My partner is currently going through grief, especially the depression phase of the grief cycle. That is obviously more periodic depression rather than clinical, however I assume that the symptoms and ... View more

Hello, I would very much appreciate your advice. My partner is currently going through grief, especially the depression phase of the grief cycle. That is obviously more periodic depression rather than clinical, however I assume that the symptoms and pains he experiences are very similar. I would like to understand better how I best communicate with him without causing him pressure and stress or accidental hurt. I am generally there for him and just let him know that he can always turn to me if he wishes to. But as we are manoevering how this is affecting the progress of our relationship, I have also shared my feelings and needs with him. I have done that in an email because he currently feels particularly comfortable when we write to each other. That way, we can both take the time to think through our response and what we think and feel. I am happy with that, so I wrote him an email telling him how I felt a little sad but how I also understand that some of the decisions we have recently had to make are the wisest thing to do right now even if not easy. I also told him that for now, I can live with the new arrangements we have put in place for us (i.e. taking it very slowly and curbing some of our previously made plans) but that I would also need to have those arrangements be temporary only. Basically, I said, I am ok with the distance and undefined nature while he focuses on rebuilding his foundation but that I would not be able to do that forever because I would need to see that we are slowly but steadily moving forward together. Are those sorts of things ok to say or are they counter-productive in his current state? He is currently starting to embrace the requirements to have more social interaction again and actively do things to avoid getting stuck in the depressive phase. I think that is great and I have given him positive feedback and encouragement because I think that is an excellent move. So I do not want to impact him negatively but I also feel I need to be honest and share my own feelings so we are communicating well and transparently. I am cautious and benevolent in my approach and I told him there is no need for him to hurry anything or feel pressure. I just felt it was important that he knows there will come a time for me when I cannot continue this way. I do not want to keep that from him and then, if it eventuates, hit him out of the blue. I would rather avoid it altogether by building awareness and therefore countermeasures together.

krybblu Hi, I'm KRY and I'd like to share
  • replies: 2

Hi folks I'm KRY and have just joined. I'm hoping to be able to make some meaningful contributions by sharing my personal experiences with depression and anxiety, and as a carer/supporter for my sibling who has been struggling with mental health for ... View more

Hi folks I'm KRY and have just joined. I'm hoping to be able to make some meaningful contributions by sharing my personal experiences with depression and anxiety, and as a carer/supporter for my sibling who has been struggling with mental health for several years now. In high school I had one close friend attempt to take her life and diagnosed with BPD, another close friend diagnosed with schizophrenia. I first felt that something was not right with myself in my late teens, but rationalised that whatever I was feeling was just teen hormones and dismissed whatever I felt as being nothing as serious as my friends. It wasn't until several years later in my final years of university that I sought professional help. I'm doing much much better with managing my depression and anxiety these days. I would say that since high school, I've always had a good awareness of mental health and conditions, but not how it applied to me. Last year, something scarier than all the hopelessness, loneliness and sense of overwhelm I felt at my worst happened... My sibling self-harmed in an attempt to escape their mental struggles. For all my personal experience, being my sibling's confidante and general awareness of various mental health conditions, none of that prepared me for this. My sibling is doing better now and I continue to be part of their immediate support group. Looking back, I wish: 1. I had a friendly adult I could trust and talk to in high school, so it could be identified earlier that I needed help. 2. I had found out earlier about all the free and credible resources available, so I didn't feel so helpless or vulnerable/ashamed to ask. 3. I was part of a community that withheld judgement and could empathise and/or understand my struggles and confusion. 4. I was able to attend a seminar/forum/expo with my family so I could educate them earlier on mental health and remove stigmatism. 5. Understood my rights especially in regards to privacy/confidentiality, so I didn't have to feel pressured to tell the GP everything I told my psychologist, then feel vulnerable and judged in order to get a new script. I'm looking forward to checking out the different threads and helping the community.

Willo2020 Lost
  • replies: 9

I am lost. My depression is now at its worst. The GP's best efforts are not helping, and I've just sold the last guitar, the one I was keeping, and put all the money into an account for my daughter's. I have no joy in even looking at the wonderful pi... View more

I am lost. My depression is now at its worst. The GP's best efforts are not helping, and I've just sold the last guitar, the one I was keeping, and put all the money into an account for my daughter's. I have no joy in even looking at the wonderful piece of wood I've had since I started earning real money. Cant even listen to music anymore. I call and get no real help. I go to mental ward, get zero help there. The selling of the last guitar was a big moment.....I have her a pat when she left. Next thing is my grandfather's 1973 Fiat 132. I need it to go to my eldest daughter. I don't know, I don't owe anyone any money, but if I "accidentally" get eaten by a shark, then I want to make sure some bottom feeder doesn't get it Im at the end....there's no cross road......just end of line

wiilson13 Overwhelmed and Exhausted
  • replies: 3

I've been seeing a psychologist for about a year now. This has helped me with a lot of my anxiety issues as I was having panic attacks frequently as I had developed social anxiety. I often faint when I panic and was in constant fear of humiliating my... View more

I've been seeing a psychologist for about a year now. This has helped me with a lot of my anxiety issues as I was having panic attacks frequently as I had developed social anxiety. I often faint when I panic and was in constant fear of humiliating myself in public as it had happened a few times is social settings like being out for dinner. I still get anxiety but not as bad anymore. Lately I've just been feeling really down about myself. And some days (like today) I just feel so low and like every choice I have made is wrong. Recently I began a Master's Degree and had to quit my full time job so I could study. I hated my job and felt liberated when I left. But now I feel so down because I am having trouble finding a part time or casual job, and am very worried about not having any income. I have applied for centrelink, but that may take weeks to come into effect. I'm really struggling to stay motivated through online study, and cannot focus. I can read a passage of text and literally not retain a single thing. I feel stupid and like I am already falling behind my peers. I am concerned I have made the wrong decision in choosing to quit a job to complete further studies. I have reached out to some of my peers to start a study group in the hopes I can get some support, but I have an assignment deadline rapidly approaching and am concerned my work will be trash. I am exhausted all the time, even when I get 8-9 hours sleep and I really struggle to get out of bed in the morning. I am overweight and try to take light walks but find I am even more exhausted afterwards. I just don't know what to do or how to get motivated.

WithoutApaddle Apathetic
  • replies: 3

Hi all. Thank you for the opportunity to share my tale of woe and dispair. This thing is going to be whinier then a three year old banned from paw patrol so buckle up. I apologize in advance for spelling and grammar issues. The public education syste... View more

Hi all. Thank you for the opportunity to share my tale of woe and dispair. This thing is going to be whinier then a three year old banned from paw patrol so buckle up. I apologize in advance for spelling and grammar issues. The public education system has failed me. Chapter one: The man behind the tears. I'm a 30 y/o male carpenter, no kids. I currently have a partner of 3 years and live with her family. I've struggled with depression for most of my life. I haven't been to a therapist, I find speaking candidly with people face to face difficult. lately i am feeling extremely apathetic. I work 50 - 60 hour weeks and am exhausted most of the time. I rent with my inlaws and have no substance abuse issues (besides coffee). Still i am struggling financially. My partner has a chronic illness and is unable to work. Living with my inlaws the last 3 years has been a real struggle. However we are unable to move out due to our poor financial situation. i find myself increasingly at my limit and have full scale meltdowns over mild inconveniences. This has been a particularly bad week as i have had some tools stolen. Partners grandmother passed And partners phone has bricked itself. For those playing at home, Data recovery is around $250 / $500. Seeing my friends marrying, starting families and buying houses is very difficult for me. Im just treading water while they move to the next stages of their lives. My partner is my rock but my constant indifference and lack of intamacy towards her is taking its toll. I don't see things improving any time soon. I hope you guys are doing better then me at this life business.

calmseeker I feel like I have hit a brick wall.
  • replies: 17

I feel lost. I have been trying really really hard to manage my anxiety and stay positive and take all the right steps to help myself, and for a few months I felt a bit better and even felt a bit empowered to offer some assistance to others but as of... View more

I feel lost. I have been trying really really hard to manage my anxiety and stay positive and take all the right steps to help myself, and for a few months I felt a bit better and even felt a bit empowered to offer some assistance to others but as of the last few days I have had terrible panic attacks again with nasty symptoms resurfacing and now I just feel really depressed and very disappointed that my efforts to overcome this condition are all in vain. I have tried to eat well and do a bit of exercise, I have started online CBT therapy which have committed too and working really hard at but the debilitating symptoms have reared their ugly head again and now I just feel really sad and tired and quite hopeless really. I have a few challenging things going on in my life that I am trying to deal with but don't we all? I don't feel like I am getting much help from my GP and I am seeing a psychologist but the visits are nearly 2 months apart as she is busy, I feel hopeful on the actual day I see the psychologist but the feeling is gone by that evening so I don't feel I am getting much out of it. It takes a lot of energy and effort to live with anxiety and I just cant seem to muster up any more motivation or hope to fight this battle right now. Feeling very low.

Hoeneka Vent (Let it out)
  • replies: 6

I vent all the time so I thought why not create a forum for me and others to vent. Heres mine today. My masked depression. I sometimes wonder, would I be better off without emotions? I get so sad and angry and I hurt, alot. I don't see much use for m... View more

I vent all the time so I thought why not create a forum for me and others to vent. Heres mine today. My masked depression. I sometimes wonder, would I be better off without emotions? I get so sad and angry and I hurt, alot. I don't see much use for my emotions really, I may aswell just have sadness because that seems to be the only thing I can feel. Sadness and anger, they can't really be controlled, can they? I try to supress my sadness but it flows out of me, I'm sure anybody can tell I'm sad. But, its not just sadness, I feel alot of different things, sometimes I think, maybe despair, the whole world if it took over, everyone would feel like me. But how do I describe my feelings, I mean to be fair I'm not even sure why I'm writing this, I guess I just wanted to vent. My life really hasn't been the greatest, primary school was horrible but my parents just put it down to "kids being kids" It kinda hurts, having your experiences doubted by parents who weren't even there to experinece it all. I don't really get an "escape" I'm stuck with this, this depression, sometimes I feel like I've made my depression into a whole new emotion, something different from what other people experience. I have alot of really low points, I'll just cry and cry, sometimes I'll put on a happy face but thats just a mask. A histerical mask, my depression, it feels like its driving me insane sometimes, I feel so numb but at the same time I'm feeling almost everything. I want to be taken away to a different world, where she cares, the girl I've tried so hard for, I just, I want to feel, I want feeling so badly. But at the same time, I never want to feel another thing, because its so goddamn painful, I mean I'm in constant pain, whether It be mental or physical, I mean sure people are nice to me but it just, I can't fully appreciate it. I feel like a broken record writing this, I feel as if every line is just repeating the same thing, with no difference, but depression isn't even the only thing weighing me down. She really thought I was getting better, because I was starting to look after myself a little more, but I guess I was just unintentionally masking it, can you even do that, put a mask on without even realizing it? I guess stress is also a big factor in all of this, highschool, oh boy, I mean sure in thr long run it sounds fun but it makes me feel even worse, the people here are much smarter than me. Theres alot more but character limit got me by 1600 words.

Hutch86 33 year old male deeply depressed
  • replies: 15

Hi I have been struggling with depression and a anxiety my whole life. I have a good job, a degree, 2 kids, a wife and a house etc but I am never happy and I have a constant sense of impending doom. I am basically an alcoholic, drug addict, and can n... View more

Hi I have been struggling with depression and a anxiety my whole life. I have a good job, a degree, 2 kids, a wife and a house etc but I am never happy and I have a constant sense of impending doom. I am basically an alcoholic, drug addict, and can not control my impulses on pretty much anything. I have gone into a downward spiral over the past 6 months and really hit the alcohol hard. I have recently gotten into trouble with the police over a drunken assault and my wife is at her wits end with me. I am basically her third child. I have really had a hard time transitioning from a partying 20 something into life as a Dad in my early 30’s. I am depressed all the time and have withdrawn from my friendship group as I am always anxious and don’t answer or return phone calls. I feel like I am just in a massive rut. I should be happy but I just can’t shake this depression and anxiety. I also have massive problems with anger. I have never assaulted my wife but I flip out over anything minor and break things etc like a child. My biggest challenge at this point is getting off alcohol. I have been going out drinking on my own to strip clubs and spending ridiculous sums of money which puts a massive strain on my marriage. Comes back to the impulse control I guess. If anyone has any decent tips on how to get off alcohol I am all ears. I suffer from ADHD and everything seems very difficult at the moment. I am a liability to my family and I know they are ashamed of me at the moment as I am also ashamed of myself and my lack of self control. I really hope I can get through this tough period and be a real man, Dad and Husband - it just seems like a monumental challenge..

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