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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 1

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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pademelon_friend Long Term Depression
  • replies: 5

Hello, I have been suffering from depression since I was about 14 and I am now 21. On nights like tonight I'm tempted to say I've hit some kind of rock bottom but the truth is I've been at rock bottom for four years. I've felt so numb for so long. I'... View more

Hello, I have been suffering from depression since I was about 14 and I am now 21. On nights like tonight I'm tempted to say I've hit some kind of rock bottom but the truth is I've been at rock bottom for four years. I've felt so numb for so long. I'm so tired of hanging on. I have told myself so many times that it is worth staying around because things will get better, because things must have to get better at some point. My numbness just hasn't changed. I've tried medications, I've been in therapy for years. I've forced myself to socialise and to engage in activities. Tonight I am just feeling so disheartened. I've recently moved to a new city for no reason other than I needed something to do. I feel so disconnected from life. I want so badly to enjoy life and to want to be alive. The thing I find difficult is the fact that I feel I've tried everything, I feel like I've tried all the appropriate channels for getting help and managing my depression, and yet nothing has made a difference. I have some beautiful and supportive people in my life who care about me very much. I am talented and creative, I am privileged, I have people show interest in me. I am so grateful for all that I have but it's somehow not enough. I still feel so little joy. I am constantly in a state of sadness, numbness, or intense anxiety. I want so badly to make the most of everything I have been blessed with but I just have no motivation because nothing makes me feel good. It would be nice to hear if anyone has suffered from deep depression for a long period of time and still found things to live for.

Succulent Queen How do you get through Xmas/New Year alone?
  • replies: 13

Hi All, I will be spending Xmas and New Year alone with my dog as I dont have any family. I have a couple of good acquaintances but no real friends. At 44 I've accepted and made peace with how things are however deep loneliness does creep in at times... View more

Hi All, I will be spending Xmas and New Year alone with my dog as I dont have any family. I have a couple of good acquaintances but no real friends. At 44 I've accepted and made peace with how things are however deep loneliness does creep in at times, particularly at this time. I was wondering if maybe we could use this thread to share ideas on how we each handle aloneness at this time of year. In the past I have used distraction to stay productive and power through the emotions of the day. The distractions I use are simple and could simply involve binge watching a series or taking some music out into the backyard and getting stuck into gardening. I also try not to buy into the concepts of Xmas that surround us and instead view it as just another ordinary day. Would be great to swap ideas and hear how you handle the day if you're spending Xmas alone. Hope fully we can help each other via doing this.

saraht885 helplessness
  • replies: 2

i never know who will be in charge of my body each day. i feel two strong opposing forces driving me insane inside. One moment im eager to grab out my diary and plan and map out events but then immediately clouded over, and the world goes back to bei... View more

i never know who will be in charge of my body each day. i feel two strong opposing forces driving me insane inside. One moment im eager to grab out my diary and plan and map out events but then immediately clouded over, and the world goes back to being inconceivable. im struggling to converse with people, have grown shy, sleeping for 12 hours a day yet still exhausted, barely using my brain but feel mentally fatigued, become lost for words, absolute no interest in any kind of activity and definitely dont want to hang out with anyone. i have never seen a doctor or specialist regarding how i feel, and dont see a point, yet im posting on here but i dont know why. i cant find any reason to this life and nothing is holding me here to stay. theres no enjoyment and people are awful. ive lost all motivation and really dont want to be slave to this. i dont indentify myself as depressed, but hopeless and wish i wasnt in this world. i guess i just wanted to use this forum to some what express my current state. i dont see things getting better and dont want to be made numb by medication or have the burden of someone listening to me whine about this. it was a good distraction typing this out, and im sorry if you read this

BlueFang Borderline personality disorder question
  • replies: 4

Hi, I was wondering if anyone knew if Borderline Personality Disorder was something you can get a pension for from Centrelink? I'm from Melbourne Vic if that helps at all. I struggle a lot with it and my mum wanted me to look into seeing if I can get... View more

Hi, I was wondering if anyone knew if Borderline Personality Disorder was something you can get a pension for from Centrelink? I'm from Melbourne Vic if that helps at all. I struggle a lot with it and my mum wanted me to look into seeing if I can get any sort of financial assistance due to it. I know I should ask my doctor but I have my anxiety about it, like asking might seem like im using my disorder to be what everyone calls "a doll blugger".

bowlofcherries Being in the black, a poem
  • replies: 1

It hits you like thunder funereal dread a dark mood’s arrived got stuck in your head It’s hard to describe the state that you’re in you can’t find the source of your power within The pain of defeat has led you to feel useless, unfinished your mind’s ... View more

It hits you like thunder funereal dread a dark mood’s arrived got stuck in your head It’s hard to describe the state that you’re in you can’t find the source of your power within The pain of defeat has led you to feel useless, unfinished your mind’s in a whirl The music has died surroundings seem dead your senses are dull where has your life led? It’s hard to define there’s no turning back you might as well face it and trudge down its track A new day is here you’re feeling much better a good night’s deep sleep has shattered the fetters Throw off the sheets Pour a nice cup of tea A song’s in your head Send the dog out to pee.

There This time of year triggers me
  • replies: 2

Hey everyone, Does anyone else find this year triggers them emotionally? I’ve had a few bad things happen consistently in December and I thought I was doing well but I find myself here today feeling.. well pretty down and emotional. I say down which ... View more

Hey everyone, Does anyone else find this year triggers them emotionally? I’ve had a few bad things happen consistently in December and I thought I was doing well but I find myself here today feeling.. well pretty down and emotional. I say down which probably means depressed but I’ve never been one to want to admit I suffer from depression. I go through times in my life where actions make me depressed but today I’m not sure I have a reason other than it being this time of year. Does anyone else get that? Times of the year they feel triggered by past emotions and actions? I used to love Christmas time, like a watch Christmas movies, have carols on all the time, couldn’t wait to see my family, would have the decorations up super early, say merry Christmas to everyone one I’d see type of Christmas love and now I feel like the grinch. Could not care less about Christmas. I do care if I see my family but the rest of it you can have and I hate that I feel this way. My apartment block had a Christmas party last night which I was an organizer of. Came to yesterday and I felt flat and run down, so I didn’t go. I should have gone but I was quite achy and in this day and age I don’t want to chance being the person that went to a party and gave everyone COVID. So I stayed home. In bed on my own. Now I’m also dealing with FOMO fall out. I know my troubles are less compared to others and I know people are struggling with more difficult stuff I just feel I have no one to talk to. If I say anything to my family they’ll get worried, my partner is a very alpha male type person so I don’t feel like he wants to listen to my emotional stuff and I don’t want to talk to any friends about it either. I don’t know what I’m looking for, just to get it off my chest I guess. Thanks x

Tempest1609 I’m Spaced Out all the Time
  • replies: 5

Hey, I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this, also I’ll be talking about my feeling about drugs and how they play a part in my life but I’m not trying to glamorise drugs because I’m really struggling to manage with and without them... View more

Hey, I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this, also I’ll be talking about my feeling about drugs and how they play a part in my life but I’m not trying to glamorise drugs because I’m really struggling to manage with and without them. I’m sorry. Im 21 years old and I’m a manager a maccas, I’m really struggling at the moment with depression, drug use, self harm and anxiety. I’m currently on antidepressants but I’m not sure if there working yet because it’s almost been a month. It’s fairly safe to say that I have been feeling really low for the last 6 months and I recently had a really big breakdown and I’m trying to help myself but it’s really really hard. Drugs are apart of my problem and I know they don’t help these feelings but I can’t stand reality I just want to be numb and care about nothing. It feels better than sex to me to just be numb. I want to stop as it had lead to physical health problems as well as adding to mental stress. But I rely on them almost every day and I just have no other way to manage my feelings. Im really bad at emotionally expressing myself and I feel like a burden talking to my friends and family but I just can’t like I physically can’t talk to them. It’s not a trust thing I just feel like they won’t take me seriously. I also don’t like doctors I just want to get in and get out so I don’t sit there and talk because I’m so anxious to be there and I’m uncomfortable, that doesn’t help when you are trying to get help. I have felt pretty worthless for a while I’ve never been skinny and it’s something that my family has always commented on and it’s always been made into this joke and that I know has played such a big part of who I am today because I never feel good enough. I pick myself apart every day, I just can’t help it. I just wanted a space that i could just say everything I want to. Thank you for reading and I hope your day is a positive one.

Tryingtounderstandmyself I feel trapped in my own head
  • replies: 2

I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like I’ve become my own enemy. I’m on edge or down most of the time and I can’t explain why. And when I think about how I feel it just makes me feel like crap even more as I don’t want to be passing on my negat... View more

I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like I’ve become my own enemy. I’m on edge or down most of the time and I can’t explain why. And when I think about how I feel it just makes me feel like crap even more as I don’t want to be passing on my negative energy to my partner. He’ll ask me what’s wrong but I don’t have any answers. Then I overthink how I’m ruining my own relationships with the ppl I love most. I doubt myself all the time now as I can’t trust my own judgement of my emotions (if Someone actually upset me or if I’m just in a down mood). I overthink everything and I’m very forgetful. Making everyday decisions is a chore that I struggle with. How can anyone understand me when I don’t understand myself. I feel so alone

Mantec Finding a good professional?
  • replies: 3

I have quite ingrained difficulties with many facets of life, which make it almost impossible for me to do more than stagnate without professional help. The main thing I just can't ever seem to make any progress with is getting out of social isolatio... View more

I have quite ingrained difficulties with many facets of life, which make it almost impossible for me to do more than stagnate without professional help. The main thing I just can't ever seem to make any progress with is getting out of social isolation and forming meaningful connections as it has been so long since I think I ever connected with anyone. I have a plethora of problems on top of that, including an inability to study or really commit to long-term goals, relapsing into states of nihilism, lethargy and trouble managing ADHD symptoms, but this has always been the underpinning factor that I can never make progress with and severely exacerbates all of my other symptoms to the point of finding life unbearable. I first sought professional help in late 2017, but the psychiatrist I was seeing was far from helpful. I didn't really like him from the start, and I didn't respect him, and he kept prescribing higher doses of medications that I don't think were ever going to work. Since I began seeing him, my social isolation and anger issues worsened, and being a musician, I completely stopped producing music or practicing my instruments for years while I was on medications earlier this year, I went straight back, despite how much skill I had lost. In hindsight, I can't believe I didn't stop seeing him sooner, and I am thus quite traumatized as I don't want to be stuck in the same situation of not knowing whether they aren't a good fit, or if my unhealthy tendencies don't like the feel of treatment. I know I never want to go onto any medications again, and thus probably want to see a psychologist/ psychotherapist, but finding one is really difficult. I have seen a sleep psychiatrist who has recommended some CBTi specialists, but the insomnia is nothing compared to my social difficulties, and thus I am hesitant to see anyone before I know how to look for psychologists. How do I find a good psychologist? I have seen a couple before, and to be brutally honest, they all just seemed like people who weren't intellectual enough to be a psychiatrist. I don't know if this is just an unlucky draw, but I don't feel particularly reassured that I am going to be able to find a useful professional online, and I don't know where else to find one. It feels the medical industry has become so insanely physicalistic as well, that I am hesitant to even listen to a GP's advise.

Infinite_Faith Compounded depression.
  • replies: 41

Hi, I've been a member of Beyond Blue for several years, although, it's been sometime since I have logged into my account. I have been battling my problems alone. Now I am back because, I'm really feeling a new low. Just when you think things can't g... View more

Hi, I've been a member of Beyond Blue for several years, although, it's been sometime since I have logged into my account. I have been battling my problems alone. Now I am back because, I'm really feeling a new low. Just when you think things can't get any worse and the only way from the bottom is up - bang something else in life punches in you face. This was another of those days. It would be nice to connect with someone on here that understands what it's like to suffer depression, someone that you don't have to explain why it's happening. If we knew why, we would fix ourselves and we wouldn't need such services. My partner often asks "what can I do to help?". There is no answer to that question. Some of use are susceptible to depression through many reasons, there is not just one single answer. I am a musician - and today we are the last on the list to find our new "Covid Normal". Musicians don't get a mention. The arts sector sits on the bottom of essential services, yet so many turn to music for comfort. Why is that? Why are we on the bottom of the pile while then called upon as the first to help and cure wounded spirits and sad and lonely souls? That's just the way it is. Today, my depression was compounded. To take my mind off depression and Covid (And the worlds problems) I purchased a secondhand electronic drum kit. The guy seemed honest. You see there is a shortage of such devices, everything is on "back order" or I would have purchased a new unit. I get it home and at first I was happy, over joyed, excited. "Wow what a get instrument, what a great honest seller. " That soon turned to despair when I discovered a fault in the unit and this great honest person turn out to be another rouge seller, palming off his faulty goods to the unsuspecting. Trusting people is a problem. Honesty is a dying commodity, integrity, to some, it doesn't matter. They just don't care. I asked for my money back, but no, apparently he was un-aware of the fault although the kit was only used a couple of times. So my new broken drum kit, that was to help me, distract me, sits as a reminder never to trust people. No mater how honest you are, mentally projecting your values on others, giving them your values is a mistake. Money is all that seems to matter. What a sad world we live in where money is valued more than ones on integrity. They don't loose any sleep, we do for being foolish and to trusting.