Depression

Depression, loneliness and just existing

replies: 4

I am going through a hard time right now. I am 40 years old. I used marijuana to escape and took a week off work. I've left a five year relationship overnight back in February due to violence. Lost my best and only mate in a car crash a year ago in M... View more

I am going through a hard time right now. I am 40 years old. I used marijuana to escape and took a week off work. I've left a five year relationship overnight back in February due to violence. Lost my best and only mate in a car crash a year ago in March. Lost my dog at Christmas to illness. I have been through so many ups and downs in life and I know it goes on. It's just hard to find any purpose. I have no friends. I have little contact with my parents who are over the other side of Australia anyway. I have a sister close but there's been a lot of betrayal and hurt in that relationship. I don't know how to meet friends or even if I can maintain anything right now. How do I be a friend when I don't even want to be around me.

Where to go from here?

replies: 4

I’m at a place where I genuinely don’t know where to go from here or what to do with my life. I try to not compare with other people but I just feel like I’m completely wasting away. I feel frozen, like a zombie. What do I do

Struggling at the moment with my family

replies: 2

Hey, i'm a 14 y/o male and ive been feeling like nothing is going right lately. My mum has been yelling at me for not going to school as i have no motivation to ever do anything. She think yelling at me is gonna solve everything and its just making e... View more

Hey, i'm a 14 y/o male and ive been feeling like nothing is going right lately. My mum has been yelling at me for not going to school as i have no motivation to ever do anything. She think yelling at me is gonna solve everything and its just making everything worse and its a repeating pattern. My older sister, 27 y/o is one of my favourite people but lately it feels like she's been hating me. We've started to hang out less and less and it feels like she doesn't like me at all anymore, barely talking to me and when she does talk to me it feels like she's against me.My other sister, 17 y/o is going through her own stuff, which i get, but she's always hates me for no reason. she threatens me all the time saying she'll bash my skull in, stuff like that. i've given up trying to talk to her as she's only nice when she needs something. Her comments are always rude and snarky and make me feel like a horrible person and makes me hate myself. she says i'm always on my devices, but the only reason that is is because whenever i try to talk to them they either ignore me completely and leave me out or throw rude comments at me until i end up going back to my room and crying myself to sleep. My younger sister 13 y/o and is basically the same as the 17 year old sister. She always comes into my room t annoy me and i scream at her to get out. and no one in my house does nothing about it, its gets me so annoyed to the point i start crying because it feels like no matter what i do no one ever listens to me or cares about my feelings. When i go into her room to hang out with her and make amends, she'll get angry at me and tell me to get out, and suddenly everyone in the house only cares about her. just the other day i was yelling at my sister to leave me alone as she kept barging in my room and being annoying, and my useless mother who never GAF about me chose her side saying I shouldn't be yelling.My mum says if i continue to not go to school shell send me back to my dads who I hate. ATP I'm debating whether or not to go with him and just run away while I'm either there or while I'm living here. Being homeless is hard, but is it harder than the social and emotional torment my stupid family makes me feel every day? All of this pressure with my family is getting really bad. It feels like the only people who are her for me are my friends, and i don't tell them everything. I'm scared ill overshare and they'll use it against me in some way.

Depression/grief combo

replies: 2

I feel like a mess since completing placement. During placement I felt like I was surviving more than thriving.. Since then I’ve fallen into a depression/grief combo.. I feel a mix of sadness and relief that its over. At placement, I had a purpose an... View more

I feel like a mess since completing placement. During placement I felt like I was surviving more than thriving.. Since then I’ve fallen into a depression/grief combo.. I feel a mix of sadness and relief that its over. At placement, I had a purpose and place go to with familiar faces but now I don’t. At the same time I haven’t had to deal with the daily exhaustion and burnout that I was previously experiencing. I don’t have confidence in my future or in my ability, that I’ll be able to live up to the requirements of my chosen path... can anyone relate?

Prenatal Depression & Anxiety

replies: 3

TW: Self Harm & Suicidal Thoughts 24F, I have a 4yo, a 2yo and currently pregnant with my 3rd, I’m 35 weeks pregnant. I’ve always struggled with anxiety and depression, it’s only ever internally, I never show it on the outside to my children. This pr... View more

TW: Self Harm & Suicidal Thoughts 24F, I have a 4yo, a 2yo and currently pregnant with my 3rd, I’m 35 weeks pregnant. I’ve always struggled with anxiety and depression, it’s only ever internally, I never show it on the outside to my children. This pregnancy has had a lot of anxiety and depression and it’s to the point I have infact self-harmed and have wished that something would happen to me whilst I give birth. I know it’s a horrible thing to think but I’m struggling so bad and my partner just doesn’t seem to understand, he just sort of brushes it off and blames the hormones. I feel so alone, but I’m too embarrassed to get help. His family is so judgemental and they’d probably laugh. There’s never been any thoughts of harming my baby or children. Only ever myself. And along with the depression and anxiety, also comes the guilt for feeling how I feel. I snap so easily at my kids, I shut everyone out. And it’s just snowballing.

I’m feeling super lonely and feel like a loser

replies: 4

I’m 38 and I feel like I’m isolated. I have no friends. In fact I just turned 39, and I spent it alone. I feel like I spend every day at home with my thoughts spinning. I wasn’t like this when I was 26. I was isolated and strong. I still didn’t see f... View more

I’m 38 and I feel like I’m isolated. I have no friends. In fact I just turned 39, and I spent it alone. I feel like I spend every day at home with my thoughts spinning. I wasn’t like this when I was 26. I was isolated and strong. I still didn’t see friends, but I had ambition and positive hopes and dreams like direction and I also could maintain relationships. When I finished with my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years in 2013, I went online to fish for connection like a relationship intimacy, and I came across a guy who knew that I was isolated without friends and knew that I was in denial about a sickness I’ve been carrying my whole life so he psychologically brought it out of me use me and left me pregnant. I’m sorry to say alone when I was 26 when I asked him for answers and questions. He went to the police and asked him for an intervention order, cause I was harassing him, which got thrown out Before 26 I hadn’t been out socially connecting with groups of friends since I was 18 it kind of faded away when I was 19 I’ve been going home in and out of mum‘s place and then she would get frustrated because I had no friends so she’d kick me out. And then I’d have to go into share houses. There I met my ex A who used to physically assault me and brutally bash me for 3 1/2 years. I felt like I was locked into the relationship the police arrested him. I haven’t been close with my dad since I was 15, my mum and dad are divorced my mum‘s an irresponsible parent police have said this. And my three other sisters have moved away from my mum so far away my real sister Ana has moved to Canada. The guy who psychologically affected and attacked me his name was J. Who I met online psychologically affected me so much that I was carrying him around like a dead horse in my mind. My mum knew that, so she brutally affected me even more by attacking people’s property like share houses my housemates property, the horrible experience, but she would tell them that it was me and I was out of control when it wasn’t. The police knew they were there. I’ve been carrying that around as well since 2015. I’ve had no intimacy relationships, marriage, socially been out for 13 years since my domestic violence relationship gone. And now I’m at home alone. I’m trying to reach out to my Nanna, but she doesn’t want to help. She just directs me into the arms of mental health. It’s sad because she only lives in the same suburb over to me. The only person I see is S this guy who I’ve been connecting with for six years. He’s got kids and I met him when I was 18 and he said that he wanted to marry me when I was 18.

Self harm

replies: 2

Ok hi everyone. I am 13, (female) and i have really bad depression. I self harm, and i have scars covering my whole left arm. I have no family. I am in foster care. I was wondering why self harm is labled as bad, because its better than suicide. But ... View more

Ok hi everyone. I am 13, (female) and i have really bad depression. I self harm, and i have scars covering my whole left arm. I have no family. I am in foster care. I was wondering why self harm is labled as bad, because its better than suicide. But also I dont want scars because they're ugly. My foster family dont know how to helo when I have episodes, and they are trying, but its not helping. Are there any good alternatives to self harm? I've tried squeezing ice cubes and stuff but nothing works. And how do I communicate my needs to my foster family? I personally dont even know what i need sooo... anyway thanks guys :3

Isolation and unemployed

replies: 1

"I have been unemployed for just a week, but I have already had suicidal thoughts for the last couple of days. I am an immigrant who has studied and worked in Australia for four years. I am a very good student and worker, but somehow I ended up in th... View more

"I have been unemployed for just a week, but I have already had suicidal thoughts for the last couple of days. I am an immigrant who has studied and worked in Australia for four years. I am a very good student and worker, but somehow I ended up in this situation. It is hard to accept, and it has lowered my self-esteem and confidence.I left my first job because I needed to find work in Adelaide instead of Sydney for my visa. Then, my second job contract ended. They offered me a three-month extension, but they phrased it like they were doing me a favor while I looked for a new job. HR didn't even ask how I felt, what I wanted to do next, or what I had been contributing. I did so much for them and was very dedicated, but they didn't care. It hurt my feelings and made me feel undervalued, even though I know I am good at what I do.Next, I tried to contact my first boss for a reference, but he didn't reply. I saw him as a friend, though we had some conflicts when I left. I don't care about the reference anymore, but as a friend, I just wanted a response. Then, my Facebook account was suspended by Meta for no reason. I felt completely isolated and couldn't talk to anyone.I have been staying in my room all day. I only feel a bit better when I go out for a walk, but I don't want to see anyone. I can't bring myself to look for jobs because I don't want to face new colleagues. I still remember my last day at work; they knew I was leaving, but they still asked me to do tasks and then acted surprised that it was my last day. I couldn't believe how fake they were.My parents passed away six years ago. I moved abroad to fulfill my dream. I graduated and kept myself busy with multiple jobs while studying another course. Now that I have nothing to do, I am starting to feel depressed. I feel a loss of purpose that is hard to bear. I feel like if I stay in my room any longer, I will end my life. Do you know where I can sit in peace with internet to work and with people around? Not public library i dont want to see anyone i know there

YOUR SPECIAL PLACE

replies: 1

Where is it? Do you have a special place? What can happen in a special place? Well, anything can happen in a place of your choosing because like dreams can invent anything, so can your imagination, fantasy and hope. There should be no room for though... View more

Where is it? Do you have a special place? What can happen in a special place? Well, anything can happen in a place of your choosing because like dreams can invent anything, so can your imagination, fantasy and hope. There should be no room for thoughts of- negativity, complaints, evil or other. Otherwise it wont be special. Find the time, say 30 minutes minimum, no phone, no distractions. The best place is a rural paddock with the rare passing of a vehicle. Or a hill, small mountain. The bush, among the bracken. Alone and any animals come by its a bonus. Sit, lie down, look at the sky. Feel the wonder. A good time for muscle tensioning exercises. All 7 sensors working - smell the eucalypt leaves, listen to the birds, touch the bark, taste the dew, focus on anything, feeeeeeellll........ It isnt a time for thinking, worrying, its a time for your mind to chill. You might be brought to tears- fine let your mind do its thing. Some might want to listen to music. Background music like- instrumentals, titanic, Pachelbel (canon in D major my fav), Leo Rojas pan flute, etc. Hoping you'll feel your depression ooze away, let me know your thoughts Do you have a special place? TonyWK

Hi.

replies: 9

I am stuck in a really bad place and I don’t seem to be able to get myself out of. I am struggling to get out of bed, shower, cook, clean, go to work or exercise. I’m constantly scrolling reels in Instagram or Facebook wasting away the days. I’ve tol... View more

I am stuck in a really bad place and I don’t seem to be able to get myself out of. I am struggling to get out of bed, shower, cook, clean, go to work or exercise. I’m constantly scrolling reels in Instagram or Facebook wasting away the days. I’ve told my GP and I’ve started taking an anti depressant. I’ve tried different ones before in the past and always come off them. I’ve tried seeing a few different psychologists and it hasn’t really seemed to help that much. I have seen a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with depression. I live alone in a city away from family. I have a few friends nearby who know what’s going on but aren’t able to help that much. It’s been a rough few months and few years and I’m really worried about how to get out of this place. I had t ok take time off work last year due to this and then this year lost my job and have now depleted my savings and gone into debt. I know nothing is going to change overnight or even in a few weeks but I just don’t know what to do. I am a 30 year old female and I feel like I have no future, no hope or dreams and I don’t want to live like this. I don’t have any suicidal thoughts or ideas and am not self harming other than not eating enough proper food or staying hydrated. I’m trying to keep in touch with my friends and family for support but it’s hard when I just cry on the phone to them and they can’t do anything or when I meet a friend for a walk I feel like I’ve got nothing to say.

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