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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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white knight Seeking the origin of anxiety
  • replies: 8

It is reasonable to think that finding the origin of why something happens is the first step in a cure. I'm not suggesting a cure for anxiety but yes towards the first step in terms of understanding it. A lifetime (I'm 58yo) of anxiety largely reduci... View more

It is reasonable to think that finding the origin of why something happens is the first step in a cure. I'm not suggesting a cure for anxiety but yes towards the first step in terms of understanding it. A lifetime (I'm 58yo) of anxiety largely reducing in the last 5 years. Along with depression, dysthymia and bipolar 2. So after 10 months being retired on medical grounds my wife and I set off for a major city to shop, a 45 minute journey on a lonely road. All was fine, we had good conversation, the weather was good. My wifebrought up a new topic- my colonoscopy for next week. Fine,we chatted. Then she stated a few things "we better not forget our paperwork" and "we have to get to the hospital by 9am". Then another "You have to fast on Sunday- you'll hate that". There was no fault from my wife. But my anxiety shot up through the car roof. I mentioned this to her. And we explored why. See, as I told her, I've had about 90 jobs in my working life. Most jobs there was always someone that would try to put the fear into a new arrival eg "You havent met the boos yet, when he comes back from leave on Monday you'll realise what you are in for" or "Wait till we get a big shipment, then you'll know what work is all about". On every occasion that fearmongering presented itself I personally got through it with flying colours. So why the anxiety? My childhood seemed normal but it wasnt. My father I rarely saw as he'd work 12 hours days. My stay at home mum was affectionate but erratic. I'm estranged from her now and have been for 4 years and I believe she has BPD. Her mood was never predictable and I was always in fear of her screaming at me without notice even for minor things. Then after upset I'd get a hug and often an apology from her. The two extremes were never met with the middle ground it was either affection or screaming. for the first time in my life I have directly associated my anxiety to a source. Now my wife and I can direct our conversations and my thoughts AWAY from what if topics or any topics that could grow fear. And if we do stumble upon such topics we can overcome fear by cutting it off early eg "that's ok, we'll get through it. We've planned everything so that will be ok" Effective reassurance....easing back out of the fear trap. My anxiety largely has reduced over the last few years due to retirement, financial plans and lifestyle. Also family decisions like ridding my life of negative people with expectations. Today I took another leap forward.

SubduedBlues is this what anxiety feels like
  • replies: 1

Question As a sufferer of depression, is it normal, or more accurately is it a normal comorbid condition, to be overly concerned about or afraid of being judged or compartmentalized to the point of subtle rejection in social environments? Tuesday eve... View more

Question As a sufferer of depression, is it normal, or more accurately is it a normal comorbid condition, to be overly concerned about or afraid of being judged or compartmentalized to the point of subtle rejection in social environments? Tuesday evening I endeavored to attend a social night through meetup-com, but became so afraid that they'd notice I'm not the same anymore. That I'm different, I'm no longer find myself happy to mingle with strangers like everyone else here. I couldn't even get enough courage to talk to the bartender to get a glass of water. I can't be seen as, well, this new undesirable me. So I left. The new me sucks, I miss the old me. At least he was fun to be. D'

Mumof02 New to panic disorder
  • replies: 3

Hi I'm a mum of two, separated from husband and have been seeing my new partner for almost 2 years. Almost every time we have a controversial arguement a panic attack is triggered. In my past relationship I never caught or dealt with problems, and gr... View more

Hi I'm a mum of two, separated from husband and have been seeing my new partner for almost 2 years. Almost every time we have a controversial arguement a panic attack is triggered. In my past relationship I never caught or dealt with problems, and growing up with a single mum I never witnessed anything of the sort, now with my partner I feel under attack by him and I panic for no reason at all... I can't breathe.. Feel nauseous... Like my world is caving in... It's almost euphoric. I'm terribly embarrassed by these outbursts and when they happen again.. I panic for the fact I'm panicking ... It seems to get worse everytime and I'm at a point I'm scared I may hurt myself physically. i know this must stem from my up bringing, my whole life my mother ran from all her problems. We jumped from school to school and I never observed how to sit and deal with it. Instead... I run too. We argue and flight mode kicks in... I instantly want to run to avoid dealing. Then when my partner forces me to stay.. I panic. Does anyone else on here relate? Does anyone else feel like a failure because of these attacks

J_Bella Not coping well with stress.
  • replies: 3

Hey guys, was hoping people could share some helpful tips with me. Generally I don't feel depressed or anxious, but I've noticed a trend that whenever I get stressed (generally from uni) my emotions tend to peak. I'm in my final semester of nursing b... View more

Hey guys, was hoping people could share some helpful tips with me. Generally I don't feel depressed or anxious, but I've noticed a trend that whenever I get stressed (generally from uni) my emotions tend to peak. I'm in my final semester of nursing before graduating, and it's been particularly bad this semester I'm thinking from the stress of uni work and career and job prospects (interviews and what not). I've taken a number of reliable online screening assessments which have been saying I've got moderate levels of anxiety and stress, and should probably see a counselor, but I'm not comfortable with that since the last two times I've been (both years ago) were not particularly good experiences. I've been trying my best with some coping mechanisms like speaking to people I trust (although I'm not feeling I'm getting enough support from them), exercising (which I feel I'm putting too much into as an outlet to stress), and trying to stay on top of my assignments. I've been having a hard time concentrating and staying focused on my work however, have a lot of problems falling asleep and staying asleep, still feel tired during the day, and the smallest things set me off in tears. I've also noticed I've become much more obsessive over things I was only a little worried about before uni. I've also been trying to minimize the amount of time pressure I put on myself, like balancing out social plans with time to study a bit better, but I do have a habit of making check lists of the things I need to get done and I have a suspicion this is making me particularly stressed. One big stressor is actually time limits, and I feel like no matter how much time management I implement, because I can't concentrate it all goes out of whack and makes me feel guilty not having done the work. I know I should probably see someone, but would people have some good coping mechanisms to put in place to see if I can sort myself out better? Thanks

Lori32 Help appreciated
  • replies: 3

I was just wondering what are some of the things people have tried that have helped with anxiety, panic attacks and agoraphobia? I have tried so many different things and although they all do help a little nothing has made a huge difference so I just... View more

I was just wondering what are some of the things people have tried that have helped with anxiety, panic attacks and agoraphobia? I have tried so many different things and although they all do help a little nothing has made a huge difference so I just wanted to know what has helped others..... maybe my problem is I haven't stuck with them long enough....who knows Anyway thanks in advance!

hann1805 Wherever I go panic attacks lurking around every corner
  • replies: 6

I can't seem to control my panic attacks. I take AD's to help my chemical balance throughout the day but I can't help but feel on edge all the time. I hide all of this from the people close to me so they don't worry about me all the time. I can't see... View more

I can't seem to control my panic attacks. I take AD's to help my chemical balance throughout the day but I can't help but feel on edge all the time. I hide all of this from the people close to me so they don't worry about me all the time. I can't seem to gain control over my panic attacks. Some of them so severe that I just break down in tears in the shower so nobody can hear me. I try everything I can to calm myself down but they still get worse. The only times I only really let them get to me is when I'm completely alone, either from work in the car or in the shower like I said before. I am the sole provider for my partner and myself. I live with him at his parents place because I can't afford our own place. I'm studying for my diploma online as well as working part time. So my stress is mostly financial, I can't stick to budgets because no matter how hard I try I can't seem to make my money last. I've seen a doctor about these attacks and I did get a mental health plan set out for me but because my schedule's been so busy I haven't been able to set an appointment yet. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm so stressed and tired I just can't take much longer of this.

Jo3 Anxiety over my mobile phone
  • replies: 10

Hi everyone I have a weird anxiety issue with regards to my mobile phone. It is with me ALL THE TIME. And I check my messages and emails every few minutes. I can't seem to stop doing this. I email my psych and then check within a few minutes to see i... View more

Hi everyone I have a weird anxiety issue with regards to my mobile phone. It is with me ALL THE TIME. And I check my messages and emails every few minutes. I can't seem to stop doing this. I email my psych and then check within a few minutes to see if he has replied back. And then I keep checking every few minutes. It's getting to the point now that I hold my phone all the time wherever I go and whatever I do. It's affecting me even when we go away on holidays - this is all I seem to be doing (checking my msgs and emails). Any suggestions from anyone would be appreciated. And don't say - just put the phone somewhere else or switch it off - because I can't do that. Jo

dorothy one step forward 2 steps back
  • replies: 7

Finally for the first time yesterday I see glimmers of my old self and was feeling hopeful, then today back feeling anxious and panic and so depressed. Today I also had so much negative thoughts running through my head constantly going around and aro... View more

Finally for the first time yesterday I see glimmers of my old self and was feeling hopeful, then today back feeling anxious and panic and so depressed. Today I also had so much negative thoughts running through my head constantly going around and around it took all my strength to get up this morning. I forced myself to go for a drive to the toy shop to buy my grandson a birthday present feeling a bit spaced out and anxious I managed. What is happening to me? Why can't I pull myself out of this? what is going to happen? I can only see me losing my job, which means losing the house. My family don't deserve this or have any idea what's going on with me. I did talk to my daughter only telling her some of it because it should not be her worrying about me

This_is_my_alias Why do I need to control?
  • replies: 3

To cut a long story short, diagnosed with depression and anxiety issues in January. Have been given AD's which helped for a while, I stopped taking them, got worse again, and have been back on them for 1.5 weeks. Not long enough for them to kick in p... View more

To cut a long story short, diagnosed with depression and anxiety issues in January. Have been given AD's which helped for a while, I stopped taking them, got worse again, and have been back on them for 1.5 weeks. Not long enough for them to kick in perhaps, but at least I'm back on them. Have been seeing a psych for the last couple of months - but stopped for a month as I was overseas, and have just had one appointment since. I like talking to her (I don't like breaking down in front of her), but I can't feel myself getting better. Am I expecting too much? She recognises how I talk negatively. She recognises my need to be in total control of everything. What I can't control makes me anxious - and let's face it, that's most things in life. She tells me to practice being mindful, but I just can't see the thoughts to let them drift away. I work in an office. It's not high pressure - there's pressure, but it's bearable. Or should be. I wake each weekday morning with a sense of gloom, despair and sometimes panic. How can I make it through the day? I have no concentration. I start something, and then 5 minutes later, my mind is wondering, and I feel like I can't cope again. I don't feel like being social to people around me. I dread the thought of somebody coming up and talking to me, because I don't feel like carrying out a conversation - I don't think I can do it. I've applied to reduce my working hours to about 5 hours each day, but wonder whether that is really the answer, or just something I have convinced myself will make the work hours bearable, and then I start stressing about how I can reduce our family living expenses to make up for the lost wages. So starts another round of anxiety, which leads to depression about this whole big black hole I'm living in. I can't laugh, I don't smile - there's just nothing amusing in the world. Fortunately, things aren't so bad for me, that I'm having really bad thoughts. I have the unconditional love of my family, which keeps me going through these bad times. But my moods are impacting on them, and I don't like it. Is there any hope, or am I so screwed up, that I am going to be like this for the rest of my life?

Chloekat84 Not having the best day today. Anxiety and depression hit me hard
  • replies: 10

Hello guys i just need to vent. I havent had a good day today which i dont know why as nothing has been out of the usual. I had a joint appointment with my cafhs nurses concerning my health and where to go from here here so slowly making progess, I s... View more

Hello guys i just need to vent. I havent had a good day today which i dont know why as nothing has been out of the usual. I had a joint appointment with my cafhs nurses concerning my health and where to go from here here so slowly making progess, I see my doctor 2moro and i still havent heard from my psychiatrist. Im sick of waiting while i sit and wollow in self pity and just want to go into bed and not come out. It was also hard to not try to cry today as i was talking as well. Really not feeling myself today. Please just make this horrible adrenaline and depressed feeling go away! sorry to be so depressing guys just need to let it out