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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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JP11 I feel different
  • replies: 1

I don’t really know how to start this but here goes nothing. I have recently started uni after graduating high school last year. I did well in high school, nothing amazing but I got into the course I wanted. I’m not good in new social situations and ... View more

I don’t really know how to start this but here goes nothing. I have recently started uni after graduating high school last year. I did well in high school, nothing amazing but I got into the course I wanted. I’m not good in new social situations and considered going to an online uni for the sole purpose to get an education without the stress of a new social life and environment. I have been struggling more than I had expected. I never missed high school other than for being sick and now find myself missing quiet a few lessons. I have stopped eating breakfast on most days and my personal hygiene is lower. I don’t know if this is because I’m am struggling because of a new environment, the difficult year or if there’s something more to it. Like depression, anxiety or autism. I look at symptoms and signs and find myself matching up to them. I don’t know if I am making these up or if they are really there. Or if they are as bad or as often as I think. I don’t know if I am convincing myself of these signs or if I’m convincing myself I don’t have them. I haven’t spoken to my high school friends in weeks and don’t have anyone I really talk to at uni, besides trying to small talk when someone else initiates a conversation. I also don’t have anyone that I really feel comfortable talking to and thought this might be a good place to start.

Jolly_Chaplin Understanding your emotions - why they’re happening
  • replies: 2

Do you wonder why you suddenly feel awful and you have no control over it? Have you felt fine, but then feel trapped in negativity wondering when it will end? I’ve felt this too. It’s rare for me to feel down anymore but only because I’ve paid attent... View more

Do you wonder why you suddenly feel awful and you have no control over it? Have you felt fine, but then feel trapped in negativity wondering when it will end? I’ve felt this too. It’s rare for me to feel down anymore but only because I’ve paid attention to it, and worked on areas that were possible for me to change. Remember that you have reason to feel the way you do. It may be biological, or it could be other various things that changed your view on the world. Your mind in tangible. You have ability to change the way you think. If you decide to contact me, I’ll give you some answers. Hope you’re well. -Chris

pinktulip Finding someone to help me.
  • replies: 1

Hi there, I'm just wondering if anyone knows what I could do to find someone that could help me in my situation. I've had gaps in time in my study due to bad mental health and I want to find people who could do an diagnostic assessment of past uni co... View more

Hi there, I'm just wondering if anyone knows what I could do to find someone that could help me in my situation. I've had gaps in time in my study due to bad mental health and I want to find people who could do an diagnostic assessment of past uni content. However, because I've studied an interdisciplinary area... it's not like I can find one person and a lot of tutors are uni students who only tutor in 1 thing or so and wouldn't know about diagnostic assessment. Also, I keep getting distressed. Do you know if there's any occupation that has dealings with distressed people and that could assist me in this manner re finding applicable people? Because I cannot get help from my mother because, for example, she gets distressed and talks for a long time about mental health stuff. Also my psychologist is dismissive of me. Also, I did contact the Uni Faculty about my concerns and basically I got told "do your best in your courses" like I haven't done so in the past... Like because I've done some stuff a while ago and because probably never experienced depression... I felt like they didn't understand one bit. And I have memories of struggling to do stuff re hopelessness, meaningless and concentration issues so my self esteem isn't high.

benevolentbutterfly painful nostalgia feeling?
  • replies: 3

i feel as if whenever i get nostalgic about something, i end up feeling quite anxious and upset? one example of this is last year i got invited (out of courtesy) to a former best friend's birthday party. the two of us were best friends for a few year... View more

i feel as if whenever i get nostalgic about something, i end up feeling quite anxious and upset? one example of this is last year i got invited (out of courtesy) to a former best friend's birthday party. the two of us were best friends for a few years but drifted due to now going to separate schools and not seeing each other all the time. her friends from her school made her a video from all of them wishing her a happy birthday and she seemed to be having a really good time but the only time we spoke to each other was when i got there and we said hello to each other. i then proceeded to beg my dad for us to leave earlier (the party finished at 11; it was only about 9-9:30) and then cried almost all the way home in the back of an uber. it physically hurt that we had drifted so much that we did not talk to each other at all, when at one point in our lives we were so close that we did almost everything together flash forward to today; we were at my grandparents for mother's day and across the road from my grandparents lived family friends we have known literally since i was born. out of their family of four, three of them were now living in qld and the dad had sold the house and was moving out today to go live with the rest of the family. he invited us in one last time and immediately i was hit again with that overwhelming feeling of nostalgia and was fighting back tears the entire time i was inside i feel like every friend that i drift apart from, they manage to move on just fine, but for me, everytime i have a conversation with them or go through old text messages i feel like i'm dying inside. does anyone else feel this or is it just me? i don't have any explanation for what i am feeling and i thought maybe someone else might have an answer

The-all-seeing-Iris My extremely long rant about how my church sucks
  • replies: 4

You guys have no idea how sick I am of attending my local church, Seriously it is like the most hetero normative place you can imagine. About late last year, one of my pastors randomly inserted some homophobic nonsense into a sermon for zero reasons ... View more

You guys have no idea how sick I am of attending my local church, Seriously it is like the most hetero normative place you can imagine. About late last year, one of my pastors randomly inserted some homophobic nonsense into a sermon for zero reasons besides being human trash. It was something about how pastors who love and support LGBT+ deserved to die or other verbal garbage I really didn't want to listen to. If it could not get any worse some old ladies sitting behind me start cheering him on (which never happens since everyone in the church usually stays dead quiet. Another instance of my pastor's major bs was when we had an entire sermon about how in a (straight) marriage, the woman needs to be loved/cared for and the man needs to be respected. Now on face value, this doesn't sound all that bad, but my pastor heavily implies that men don't need to be as loved/cared for as the women do and that woman needs less respect than the man does. I believe that both partners in a relationship (regardless of gender) deserve an equal amount of respect and love. Stuff like this makes me miss my old Baptist church where not only did they rarely mentioned LGBT+ people at all, let alone complain about them/people who support them in the middle of a sermon (I mean they were probably still homophobic but at least they kept their mouths shut about it) but they had a much larger budget to do more fun and elaborate things. You could tell just by how many people were there (I think the total number was about a thousand) and how much space there was that it was supported by people who were quite financially well off. For example, our youth group (which I and one of my older sisters attended every week) did things like bowling, scavenger hunts, movie nights etc. Also every year there were camps you could go on for the summer break and Christmas in July ball (which isn't as high class as it sounds but it was still pretty fancy) where we went to another pretty high-end church that was fully catered and had hired performers. There was also this one time where we went to a youth gathering (a gathering of all the youth group from all the nearby churches) where everyone dressed like pirates and similar to the ball had food, entertainment, and performers.

Dragonsblood26 I have no friends or social life at school
  • replies: 7

Hi my name's Bronson I am a 15 year old male who loves music who is turning 16 in a few weeks. I have shoulder length hair and a very friendly nature. However I am finding school very difficult as I cannot make friends. I always try to be kind to peo... View more

Hi my name's Bronson I am a 15 year old male who loves music who is turning 16 in a few weeks. I have shoulder length hair and a very friendly nature. However I am finding school very difficult as I cannot make friends. I always try to be kind to people but the kids at my school are very rude and are always causing trouble and they think they are cool gangsters as they listen to rap music about drugs and wear baggy clothes and caps back to front. They talk to other people like crap and use offensive language and topics like Gays, drugs and sex as daily conversations. I have had stuff said to my face almost weekely because people like to take advantage of my kind nature as a way to try and make me angry. Honestly since year 8 it's been a big downward spiral for me as I'm stuck at home with no soicial life. The kids are always wrestling in the corridors and grabbing hold of me as I walk past and the teachers have done nothing about it. One stage i got fed up of their crap at the end of year 8 and got into a fight. I was suspended for 5 days and they got no punishment. I'm in year 10 and i have learned to stay calm but at lunch breaks I go and isolate myself in the library studying corner as I feel when I go into the yard i'm treated as a target by the popular kids and i want to keep out of as much trouble as possible. All i want to do is to be a good true friend to people who will actually treat them fairly and take them out for lunch or buy a treat for but all i get is crap from popular kids who think they are the coolest gangsters in the hood. I just wish there were more friendy people around so i can have a peaceful happy life and enjoy company.

Amritama I just got my heart broken...AGAIN
  • replies: 2

Hiya, This is my first ever post at an online forum and the first ever time I'm actually doing something about heartache while having the terrible fits of crying and anxiety attacks. I have had depression for most of my life but in my family mental h... View more

Hiya, This is my first ever post at an online forum and the first ever time I'm actually doing something about heartache while having the terrible fits of crying and anxiety attacks. I have had depression for most of my life but in my family mental health was such a stigma that I was constantly told to wipe my tears and put a smile and move on. It was only this year I gathered the courage to get help and a diagnosis for depression and anxiety and I have actually grown a lot from therapy. UNTIL... Well, I met a boy, we were going out for a few months and he was meant to be a rebound (As if that ever works) from a previous long term relationship which actually ended quite badly. Fast forward the great time we had together, he decided to end things with me yesterday. We went for a nice walk and I knew exactly what was gonna happen, I saw it coming. He said to me "You're just not the person I want to be with. I want a relationship where I can be my partner's best friend and I can't have that with you. And I don't want to hurt you if our feelings get stronger with each other" Fair enough. I understand. It was the right thing to do. We weren't gonna last. We weren't compatible. It was just REAL BAD TIMING. I have my wace exams in 3 weeks. I am really trying hard to deal with my depression and I am SO anxious all the time and this just made it worse. COVID like many families impacted mine too financially and emotionally. It impacted my performance at school. It affected me more than I thought it would. Truth be told. I really miss him. I have this terrible habit of caring too much about people who aren't gonna stick around in my life and this just another repetition that's swallowed me up and consumed my emotions. I just cannot stop the crying. I cannot deal with the fact that yet another person just walked out of life so easily. And what really gets me is that he's gonna be fine cause he's done this before to so many people. Its me whose left feeling empty and sad and alone because again I gave too much of myself away to someone who didn't deserve it. I'm just not coping with this little inconvenience with everything else that's going down in my life right now. I was doing well after getting help with therapy and this just really ruined my progress and I am honestly really scared of feeling this way again. Thanks for reading.

TheJackalRipper I think I don't know what to do with my life
  • replies: 2

I am 23 year old who graduated from University with a Bachelor of Commerce, majoring in Professional Accounting. I am also currently working as a casual junior accounts payable officer where I received shift on call. I was planning to start my post g... View more

I am 23 year old who graduated from University with a Bachelor of Commerce, majoring in Professional Accounting. I am also currently working as a casual junior accounts payable officer where I received shift on call. I was planning to start my post graduate degree early next year but I don't know which areas of study I want to study in. I am genuinely don't know what to do with my life in the future. One moment, I want to become an accountant and then next moment, I want to start my post graduate degree because I was struggling with finding full time accountant work and with the recession going on in response to COVID-19, it was mostly likely that I will start my post-graduate degree in finance or IT (Information Technology). I was hoping if I could get some advice from this forum and I really appreciate your time and effort. Thank you

pinktulip Career counselling
  • replies: 2

Are they any career counselling services for depressed people for a fee? Because I don't see studying re towards my degree anyway because keep getting depressed... and because I've been doing a reduced course load in the first place; I have all the m... View more

Are they any career counselling services for depressed people for a fee? Because I don't see studying re towards my degree anyway because keep getting depressed... and because I've been doing a reduced course load in the first place; I have all the memories of struggling to concentrate etc... And I look online and there's career counselling services but I don't think they are meant for people currently depressed or irritable... Oh, but I'm over 25 so I wouldn't qualify for Headspace advertised stuff... Like a psychiatrist who didn't know what they were talking about re area of study tell me I was letting myself down re changing degrees re shorter period of time and more relevant...

roxie15 I hate myself
  • replies: 4

I do. I have always felt this way. I hate how obnoxious I usually sound and even though it's is not hard for me to make friends, but it's hard maintaining them. The thing is that I was a people pleaser. I used to act how others wanted me to act. So I... View more

I do. I have always felt this way. I hate how obnoxious I usually sound and even though it's is not hard for me to make friends, but it's hard maintaining them. The thing is that I was a people pleaser. I used to act how others wanted me to act. So I used to be hard on myself when people wouldn't like me and make a list of how I can please them. It was exhausting. And moreover, I could never feel close to others because in my mind I always knew that none of them knew the real me. I felt alone. So I decided to change that. I thought this year I will focus all the attention on myself and will not care what others think of me. For that ofc I had to remove all the toxic people from my life to have a new head start (that was the hardest). It is October now, and right when I thought that I would not hate myself and love me for the way I am, it is so hard. For a very long time I have avoided all these flaws in me that it is hard to accept them all over again. I do have a best friend btw (she lives in a different country, I am an international student), and she keeps telling me that although I do act crazy but that is normal, everybody is annoying in one way or the other- they just don't know it. And she's right (wish I was one of them . Life would've been so much easier. But it is not. And the worst, real me is so obnoxious. I don't like her, but I want to because I know this is what I am. And I am this way because of all the rejections, hurt and abandonment. And it is okay to feel this way. But it is hard.

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