Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Bullied and I didn’t even realise

replies: 2

In my last semester of highly school what I thought was never going to happen did, I became the outcast of the friendship group and unfortunately am still suffering the consequences. I had been friends with these people for over 10 years, I know people move on but by the end of school they hated my guts and no one could tell me why. Tensions and resentment had been building for sometime but I was only one ever saying sorry, Sorry that I could only see faults in people, sorry I made them feel like couldn’t enjoy their high grades sorry that I couldn’t be like a normal friend and invite them to my house. But they always criticised me my marks, my looks, my socioeconomic status. There were times where I would share some facts then two weeks later they would tell me the same thing when I would say I told you the response was no didn’t I meant this in extension. There was an example in year 10 where we were at a party and they didn’t want me the photo in fact even the adult were excluding asking me to sit out for photos. when I asked why that said that they couldn’t change what happened they were sorry. For me it felt like evidence that they never saw me as an equal just a pity case. I didn’t get a phone till year 11 then social media till year 12 I thought finally I would fit in. But the thing that tipped the scales was what I call the limousine. For year 12 formal the group was going to get a group car. At the same time very thing was being organised my grandparent passed. And I didn’t have a job yet. I don’t get birthday money or pocket money so I really don’t have anything no bank account. So I couldn’t pay and asking my parents at the time just wasn’t the best idea. I owed like 34- 40 dollars which I know isn’t a lot I just couldn’t ask. Soon one of the three started asking for their money. When I was talking to another friend they said I was a terrible person that they work hard for their money that nobody was going to cover my expense. To clarify I never asked and what hurt me even more is that when my family suffered a period of unemployment I had always known how hard it is to work for money. ( my friends all got allowances from their parents). The text conversation had happened in holidays by the end my so called friend of ten years had reduced me to tears saying that I was pathetic friend, selfish - I don’t understand I never degraded them when they had a boyfriend I never spread lies I always asked if they were okay even when they got sick with covid I checked in everyday- when I got it they never even asked. by the end of year 12 I spent most break-times in the bathroom just to avoid the guilt and shame I felt. I didn’t go to my graduation - but unfortunately I’m still living with shame and guilt - but now I feel crazy with paranoia about not trusting people I even deleted one of my closest friends contact because I don’t know who to trust. I feel so alone I feel unmotivated with life and the only thing that brings me joy is gardening. I know in the end I isolated myself which probably made the situation worse. But was it all my fault did I read into things to much - nothing I describe will every fully encapsulate all the elements but did I do this?

i wish i was a child again

replies: 3

ugh, where do i start? i just really wish that i was a child again. i never really appreciated it when i actually was that age, but now i look back and i think, 'wow, my life was so much better back then.' i wasn't struggling with my gender identity, i didn't have to worry about my body developing (and the fact that i hated it), i wasn't put under ridiculous amounts of pressure to do assignments and work hard all the time...i had it good. but it's not just those big things that make me want my old life back. it's the little things too. it's the fact that people stop squealing and calling you 'cute' after a certain age, and that you're expected to watch some sort of weird teen drama series instead of winnie-the-pooh (yes, i still watch it lol), and that you're never going to get those cute little kids' activity packs at the airport anymore. it's the fact that never again am i going to get smiley faces drawn in ketchup on my dinner plate, or be read a bedtime story at night, or be able to play children's games at lunchtime (without being judged) instead of just mooching around talking to my friends. no, instead i'm expected to study, study, study, and when i'm not doing that, i should be scrolling through instagram looking at all these cool new dresses and makeup kits and whatnot. i guess you could call this all very bittersweet. i was looking at the DVDS i used to watch when i was 6 years old and i just cried. i remembered watching all the same scenes as a child, and felt strangely happy - but also so sad that i'd never get back to that time when life was simple and i had nothing to worry about. and the worst part is, it's not going to get better from here; i still have years of school left. life was so much better back then.

Do I have a problem?

replies: 3

Hi again, im worried im posting too much on here lol but my therapists on leave  My friend and I have just decided to take a 30 day break off the special lettuce but i don’t know if i can do it. I’ve used basically everyday the past couple years..I ... View more

Hi again, im worried im posting too much on here lol but my therapists on leave 💀 My friend and I have just decided to take a 30 day break off the special lettuce but i don’t know if i can do it. I’ve used basically everyday the past couple years..I used it to help with my eating disorder, it helped my mood, my anxiety, my thoughts started to not be so intense. I’ve been off for a couple days now and I can’t stand myself. I hate the way I think, how slow the day goes, I have zero motivation still.. I thought bud might be the problem but i think it’s just me. I promised my friend i’d do this with her and I don’t want to let her down or anything - I feel like i’m betraying her if i go back to it This seems like a problem..do i need to talk to someone about it orrrr

help? I need someone to talk too

replies: 15

I suffer from anxiety and depression and lately it has started getting really bad, im to ashamed to tell anyone let alone go to a doctor because im one of those people that keep everything inside and just get over it (tell people I don't feel feelings). I tell myself im just imaging it and that im fine and to get over it.. (feeling makes me feel weak aand embrassed) I have completly isolated myself and feel alone. Even self medication. What can II do? Btw (im a 20yr ofemale)

Not feeling understood by the people around me

replies: 3

Is there any in-person discussion group for people who had suicidal thoughts? I am feeling a bit better right now and hope I'll have the courage to mention it to a friend later today. But I also feel like talking to someone who, at some point, had the same thoughts as me. I wanna feel more understood. I am scared mentioning it to people around me but I feel ready to say it out loud. Cheers,

I don't know what else to do anymore

replies: 2

I have been feeling so awful lately. I'm so miserable and my sister is getting everything handed to her and I'm trying so hard and and getting nowhere. I'm actually crying writing this. I just feel like what's the point in trying anymore. I always get so upset because I try so hard but get nowhere and everyone around me gets handed everything for nothing. It makes me soused and angry. I feel I have and I am nothing. I have no one I can talk to because everyone just accuses me of being jealous. A lot of the time I feel like it would be so much easier to disappear. I just want someone who understands but nobody ever does

Failed final year of uni, disappointing my parents

replies: 4

I'm a 24 years old university student who has been studying graphic design for 3 years. Lockdown was very hard for me mentally last year. I struggled to handle the study load and almost failed all units by not meeting deadlines. I was optimistic for this year to improve myself, decreased the study load and met deadlines. I felt like I was going well until the second semester rolled into lockdown mode. I was doing an internship along with two units and I let my studies slip, skipped classes for fear of judgement and missed deadlines. Now I am a month away from finishing my units, but I already know I have failed a core unit that is equivalent to 2 semesters. I haven't told my parents yet, but my mother has already expressed her disappointment in me if I don't graduate this year because I will be a burden on the family for not becoming independent at my age. My options are either to exist the course under a lower degree, Bachelor of Design Studies (although it is not recommended if I want to pursue a professional career related to my degree) or repeat another year to complete my course, Bachelor of Design (Visual Communication). I am honestly just sick and tired of University life and just want to use my skills to work, but I fear maybe I'm just running away from my problems and won't be able to find a job by existing with a lower-ranked bachelor degree. I feel like such a failure and embarrassment to my family and feel like I'm never going to improve as a human being with my negative mindset. Someone, please advise how I could move on from here?

Life is so overwhelming

replies: 2

I just feel like life is so hard right, I’ve been taken off my adhd medication, it’s been 2 months and I’m finding life extremely difficult. I’m crying all the time, I’m easily overwhelmed, I can’t work with needing to take a minute to stop crying cuz my head is just going insane. I feel like I’ve just lived for everyone else for my whole life and never discovered myself and now I’m an adult I have no idea who I am, what I want to do with a career, I have no passion to want to do things for me. I’m just so over not being able to do what I want cuz I don’t even know what that is and I feel like I can’t do it cuz everyone around me just judges my every move

Need help to get over someone.

replies: 1

hey there! I’m a 19 yo asking for advice on how to get over someone. So over a year ago I met this guy in my first year of uni. I went to an all girls high school so I had zero experience with dating and flirting. This guy asked me out a few weeks after we met. I said yes. The date went really well, but I also wasn’t sure what a good date or a good connection was supposed to feel like due to my lack of experience. I ended up pushing him away, saying it was the wrong timing. A month later, he wrote a song about that day, how he was sad that I’d left so abruptly and performed it at a talent show that he organsied. My friend sent me a video of it and the lyrics were so sweet. I had moved back home from uni by this point, living in a different city. Despite this, I reached out to him, not mentioning the song. We reconnected, started talking. A few months later I went to see him in a play. He then invited me to his 19th birthday party, where we shared a few cute moments and almost kissed. A big deal for me. AND he performed the song in front of me. A week after the party he travelled to my city to go on a date with me. But the date was a disaster. Not only did I unknowingly have Covid, I did a lot of things without thinking. Such as telling him he was my first date and that I’d never been in a relationship. I came off as anxious, desperate, codependent, obsessive, clingy and shallow. Not a true reflection of who I am at all. Anyway, after that date he told me we were better of as friends. I was so completely guttered. So not only did I feel mad at myself for saying and doing the things I did, mainly due to my sick delirium, I was mad because I couldn’t justify feeling heartbroken over a relationship that never happened and was entirely a projection of my own first relationship fantasy. A year later and I still haven’t seen him. Though I did send a message to apologise for everything I said and did that day. We don’t talk anymore. I just want to know why I still always catch myself ruminating on that one day, even a year later? He’s hosting another annual talent show at my old uni tomorrow. A uni I am still emotionally attached to. That might be a reason these feelings have resurfaced. It doesn’t help that I’ve had quite a lonely life since moving back to the city. I feel like it still constantly eats away at me. Whenever I’m feeling low, which is often these days, my mind goes straight to that memory. How can I overcome this and move on?

Hanging out with friends

replies: 3

Hi, how are you all today?Right now I wanted to talk about an experience, which has been bothering me recently. My best friend (lets call her A), gets really jealous when I hang out with other friends, and constantly confronts me and asks why she wasn't invited. I always feel so bad for her, but her questioning has recently made me feel very uncomfortable. It has gotten to the point now, that whenever I go out with other friends, I am scared that she might find out and start questioning me again. At first, I didn't think too much of her questioning, however as time has passed, the questions really get on my nerves. She usually asks questions like "Oh, but why didn't you invite me?", or "You and (name) hung out without me?!". Questions like these in general, and I really no longer know what to do. I have mentioned to her before, to please stop asking but it fell on deaf ears. I am not really sure what to do, is this a universal experience? I would really appreciate some advice on how to approach this situation. Hope you all have a nice day!

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

Bullied and I didn’t even realise replies: 2

i wish i was a child again replies: 3

Do I have a problem? replies: 3

help? I need someone to talk too replies: 15

Not feeling understood by the people around me replies: 3

I don't know what else to do anymore replies: 2

Failed final year of uni, disappointing my parents replies: 4

Life is so overwhelming replies: 2

Need help to get over someone. replies: 1

Hanging out with friends replies: 3