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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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hann1805 Things are going downhill fast
  • replies: 7

I've been suffering anxiety and depression for years now, I went through a really rough patch mid last year and after nearly 6 years of going without medical help I finally plucked up the courage to talk to a GP about everything and it helped a lot. ... View more

I've been suffering anxiety and depression for years now, I went through a really rough patch mid last year and after nearly 6 years of going without medical help I finally plucked up the courage to talk to a GP about everything and it helped a lot. I even got to the point where my doc was okay with lowering and eventually stopping my medication. In December last year, the store my boyfriend and I worked at went under and over 40 people lost their jobs along with us. We were looking at apartments to finally move out together and then all the money we saved to move out suddenly moved to keeping ourselves afloat until one of us could get a job, we also discussed that I would finish my diploma as I am eligible for gov benefits but he isn't so he would look for a job. Nearly 5 months later and he still hasn't found a job and I am almost finished studying. I'm finding my anxiety and depression is the worst it's been in my life. I cannot for the life of me get out of bed in the morning anymore, I'm only a subject away from finishing my diploma but have no motivation to do anything. I'm finding nothing I do makes me happy anymore, I unfortunately snap at my boyfriend over petty things, my self esteem is at an all time low, I have trouble accepting the fact that he really does love me. I live with him and his parents because I can't support myself and I honestly feel paranoid that they're talking behind my back about me, regardless of whether I'm pulling my weight or not. I feel like I'm just a burden on them. I know I need to see my GP again and I will next week but I just don't know what else to do anymore, I just can't seem to find happiness in anything anymore.

Belle1994 Anxiety and depression
  • replies: 4

This is my first time posting. I guess I just want to write down how I'm feeling somewhere Ive never told anyone that I feel this way and when I try they tell me that I'm just over reacting and that I need to get over it. For years Ive told myself I ... View more

This is my first time posting. I guess I just want to write down how I'm feeling somewhere Ive never told anyone that I feel this way and when I try they tell me that I'm just over reacting and that I need to get over it. For years Ive told myself I don't actually have a mental condition and that I was just seeking attention. But after eight years of feeling this way I know it can't be that. I think I have dysthymia (chronic depression) I've done lots of research and it describes me perfectly. Im constantly sad and tired. I feel hopeless and like I can't ever be bothered doing anything. I don't really enjoy anything. I'm scared that if I don't get help I'll just stay this way forever, being alive but not actually living or really feeling anything. I also believe that I have anxiety. I get anxiety over just about anything but its mainly triggered by social encounters. My friends and family think I'm just shy and anti-social its more than that. Going to class or answering my phone gives me anxiety attacks. This usually happens at least once a day. I can't breathe, my heart starts beating really fast, I get really hot and I feel like I'm going to throw up. They happen so regularly that I can carry on a conversation while one is happening because Im so used to it. I know I need to change my life if I have any chance of actually being happy. But I'm not sure how. I know I want to drop out of university because I hate it and I'm not even interested in the career path I'm on. I know I want to leave where I'm living now and move back home with my parents. I know I need help. I just don't know how. I don't know how to talk to the people around me and I don't know how to get professional help. If anyone can give me any tips on how to get any sort of help that would be really great. Otherwise I know it would be helpful to hear from anyone going through something similar who can give me any kind of advice Thanks Belle x

talen Depression's the norm, not the exception.
  • replies: 3

I've been "depressed" for about 4 years now—I'm using quotes because, well...my experience with it has been completely bizarre. If you looked at my life on paper, you'd never think I was depressed. Relatively speaking, things are good (and not just i... View more

I've been "depressed" for about 4 years now—I'm using quotes because, well...my experience with it has been completely bizarre. If you looked at my life on paper, you'd never think I was depressed. Relatively speaking, things are good (and not just in a superficial way). I have longtime friends, a caring family, I've accomplished a lot of things that I know are meaningful. But on the inside, it's like someone dunked me in bleach. Emotionally, I'm completely blank 95% of the time. I don't feel sad or angry. Just empty. I don't know why it started. It just kind of crept up on me. At first it was really hard. I'd just sit around doing nothing, because I had no sense of emotional motivation/direction—for big things (life goals), or even small things (interacting with people). For example, someone at school would tell a joke. I would normally expect to laugh. Instead, it was like the feeling just never came. Like someone had gone in and snipped wires in my brain. Now I'm better at it. Essentially, I just fake everything. It works. But it's exhausting. I have to think about every decision I make and everything I do rationally. And even though I do all the things that should help me feel better (tons of exercise, playing in a band, reading, talking to lots of different people), none of it has the slightest effect on me. Even though I'm fine on the surface, I can't make emotional connections with anything or anyone (even though they might be connected to me). Overall, I'm just completely burned out and I'm not sure what to do about it.

Jay95 Chest pains + random spurts of shortness of breath
  • replies: 9

I've had generalised anxiety disorder for quite a few years now and I know my body and my mind and when my anxiety is flaring up, all that stuff. But lately, I've been having chest pains just at random, they last about 5 or 6 seconds and then go away... View more

I've had generalised anxiety disorder for quite a few years now and I know my body and my mind and when my anxiety is flaring up, all that stuff. But lately, I've been having chest pains just at random, they last about 5 or 6 seconds and then go away, only to come back again sometimes 10 minutes later, sometimes not for a couple of hours. That's gotten better less frequent, but I've started noticing I get short of breath even when I'm not doing anything?? Even just sitting on the couch. I don't have asthma and I've been to the doctors who did a blood test but haven't gotten a result yet. I'm thinking my anxiety could be getting worse?? thinking about that makes me anxious. being sick with no answers makes me anxious :s

Stacie Every I hate myself. I am never good enough
  • replies: 3

Hi, Every day I struggle with low self-esteem. I know I am not good enough, I am surrounded by facts that prove it. I have moved cities for a job and to be with my partner. But it's been 2 years and I have no friends and I am absolutely miserable. I ... View more

Hi, Every day I struggle with low self-esteem. I know I am not good enough, I am surrounded by facts that prove it. I have moved cities for a job and to be with my partner. But it's been 2 years and I have no friends and I am absolutely miserable. I have only put on a staggering amount of weight, gotten to the point that I thought I would never reach (obese now). Struggle to figure out what to say people, always self-conscious and awkward. I honestly don't know how to interact with people anymore. I don't feel good about myself. I look horrible in clothes. My mother lives far from me and every conversation I have is about my weight. I have tried diets and exercise, but the weight just bounces back so fast and seems impossible to lose. I feel so alone. Even my partner comments about my weight almost every day. He jokes about it and doesn't intend to be malicious, but we all know what he's doing. Even aside from the weight I am an introvert and struggle to make friends. But when I do I made a few close ones. But now the best friend I have left is interstate, we don't speak as much anymore because life just happens. Everyone around me is just better. They are better looking, smarter, they have lots of friends. People tell stories about their weekends of birthdays and movies and doing fun stuff. I have none of that. Part of my job is doing this other qualification that you have to sit a few exams for. People sometimes say I'm smart. But I have failed every exam for this qualification and have to keep sitting supplementaries. Thank God so far at least I have passed the supp. But even then people study less and do better. I am at a work environment where everyone performs better. Every day all I see are facts of my inadequacy. I have turned into a totally negative person. But these are the facts that I am handed with. How can I make myself feel good when all the clothes I wear look horrible or it's a huge struggle because I'm fat. I've been good at sports as a child. I have horrible coordination and already have bad self-consciousness... everything seems to spiral. I don't even like my job but another year I tell myself is what it takes for me to get my qualification, but even then I have junior staff who started later than me and have caught up. They are likely to pass the recent exam where I have failed. More embarrassment again.

bpeaa Im the black sheep in the family ...
  • replies: 1

... and my family hate me for it. Im 22 years old, and ive started 4 uni degrees since finishing school.. I've completed one. currently working on finishing my second.... its not going to well and I feel like that's for no other reason then the fact ... View more

... and my family hate me for it. Im 22 years old, and ive started 4 uni degrees since finishing school.. I've completed one. currently working on finishing my second.... its not going to well and I feel like that's for no other reason then the fact that im miserable at home my mum is a recovered alcoholic personal trainer who places a ridiculous amount of importance on the physical aspects of a person. And what she lacks in intelligence she makes up for in being judgmental. My father is an alcoholic but the hardest working man I've ever met. He's also horribly cold and only ever told me he loved me once. The other day he informed me the most annoying thing about me is that im alive - he was sober. My sister is the type of person who has to have everyone love and adore her. She has to be known as sweet and gentle. She just moved back in at home with her partner - she's 7 months pregnant and driving everyone insane. As for me .. I've always felt different. Ive always been naturally smarter then my brothers and sisters and done well at school and my academic ventures without much effort. This annoyed everyone. My parents would yell and question my dedication and id return to them after screaming matches with my well above average marks. They'd then yell at me for gloating. When I was a baby I started modeling. It carried on until I was about 16. My sister couldn't stand it and hated me for it. I was bullied in school all the way too high school. Mum would go on about how I was the most beautiful girl in the world and how everyone was just jealous, my sister included. This all changed when I was 17 My body went all weird .. I started eating badly. Quit all my sports. Hated myself. ive just put more and more weight on. All my friends say they can't see it and that I don't look different but my mother is disgusted by me. She constantly makes remarks on my weight and how beautiful I used to be or could be and how ive ruined myself. Then my dad will join in and bring up my failures. They bury me into the ground about every aspect of my character. As a result home is horrible not a day goes by where someone doesn't make a comment. If I cry I get called a drama queen and depressing.My mum will often make a remark as im leaving for the day. Eg you look wide in that. Uni seems impossible because its what my parents want not what I want. I just want to be a vet nurse but they say thats settling and that il never make enough money to be happy.

Purple16 Feeling alone and hopeless
  • replies: 2

Hello, I am struggling to understand my head. I get so overwhelmed with everything at once such as work and life. I have a very loving boyfriend that I don't like telling him how I feel or speaking to anyone for that matter because I feel like I will... View more

Hello, I am struggling to understand my head. I get so overwhelmed with everything at once such as work and life. I have a very loving boyfriend that I don't like telling him how I feel or speaking to anyone for that matter because I feel like I will bring them down. Also I think they don't care and I feel I should just harden up. Every night I have to distract myself from crying because I think that my job is stressful, I'm not going to be successful and I feel like I'm a not a good person to be around because I have about 4 people I actually call friends. Some days I feel ok but every day I overthink about everything and don't feel myself. I hate it. Do I need help or am I just over reacting (which is what I convince myself)

Adri I need help over coming panic attacks and anxiety.
  • replies: 3

I have been having panic attacks on and off for years. I didn't tell anyone for years and when I finally did my family thought I was looking for attention. My mum has always hated me and no matter what I do it's not good enough. My teachers have star... View more

I have been having panic attacks on and off for years. I didn't tell anyone for years and when I finally did my family thought I was looking for attention. My mum has always hated me and no matter what I do it's not good enough. My teachers have started noticing that I'm distracted and it's starting to affect my school work and social life. I just don't know what to do anymore.

Idontknow I don't know if I have depression or it's just life?!
  • replies: 4

I am currently in year 11 and am doing vce. My parents separated a couple of years ago and we only moved houses just last year, starting the whole shared custody thing (living at mums, staying at dads every second weekend and alternate Thursdays). Th... View more

I am currently in year 11 and am doing vce. My parents separated a couple of years ago and we only moved houses just last year, starting the whole shared custody thing (living at mums, staying at dads every second weekend and alternate Thursdays). They don't (won't) talk to each other at all. My coordinator talked to me about it and suggested I talk to someone from the welfare team at school. I agreed to only one session with the psychologist because I thought everything was great and nothing was wrong at all. After my session with the psychologist, she asked me if I wanted to continue seeing her and without much thought I said "no".Now I regret that. I don't know if I have depression or if these are normal thoughts and feelings to have. I'm usually a high achiever at school and really involved in sports. Lately I've been doing the worst I've ever done! I failed 3 out of 5 exams and stooped the level of my netball game. I've also realised since my parents split I've had a greater urge to eat food and I can't control myself anymore, making it a circle of feeling bad and eating more food. Which also connects to the way I always feel sad and angry and mad and having the urge to cry. But Recently talking with my friends about self harm, they got really worried because apparently these aren't normal thoughts. On top of that, I hate going to my dads house, packing all the time and practically living out of a bag but I feel like he will take it personally if I say anything. I don't know what is going on because I feel like I can't have depression because I am always laughing with my friends at school.Is this crazy?!beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

yesican128 Alone.
  • replies: 5

I'm 20 years old and currently studying at university. I'm not very good at expressing my feelings and I don't like talking about myself, and I think these are some of the reasons that I have been feeling anxious and depressed for a while now. I'm ex... View more

I'm 20 years old and currently studying at university. I'm not very good at expressing my feelings and I don't like talking about myself, and I think these are some of the reasons that I have been feeling anxious and depressed for a while now. I'm extremely lonely even though I have a good family and friendship group, and I'm scared that as they all begin to move on with their lives I will be left behind. I find it hard to escape from my thoughts, especially when I am alone. I'm not really looking for much from this post, I just wanted to share my thoughts.

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