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Social Anxiety

Community Member
I'm new to this site and have been struggling with social anxiety, probably since high school. I am now in my second year at university and have only recently just started to see a psychologist. I have days were its not so bad, but most of the time i sit in my tutorials and just feel really anxious. I always think people are watching me and like today i get this thing where somedays I just pretend I'm on my phone when walking in public to avoid eye contact. A few times I've even felt to anxious that I had to vomit, since i did in front of my boyfriend I'm scared that it will happen again and now its grown into this huge thing where i don't eat in public places. I haven't written on a forum, so not really sure what else to put. Why won't it just go away, i know that i shouldn't be anxious and all that but i just cant. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 9 months, recently I've been feeling really worried that he will get to the point where he just won't be bothered anymore and will leave me. I know its irrational thinking but it just won't go and i get really upset with myself. Thanks for reading x
4 Replies 4

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Sarah,

Welcome to the forums. Social anxiety is a really common problem, so you shouldn't have too much trouble finding others here who can understand what you're going through. Check out some recent threads below for insights and feel free to strike up some conversations with our other members:

Social anxiety - by Katie101

Social anxiety at school - by Gtwow

Social anxiety - by clouise

Social anxiety - by Jukee

I can't handle the social anxiety anymore - by kelliew

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Sarah,

Welcome to Beyond Blue and to the community here. As Chris has mentioned, there are certainly a lot of posts here referring to social anxiety.

Try researching social anxiety and ways to overcome it. Has your psychologist offered you some strategies for overcoming your anxiety?

I suffer from stress and depression, so my situation is a little different, but I do still have issues that I need to address.

When my depression is bad, I tend to just want to shut myself away and stay at home, not connecting with people, and not even wanting to answer the phone.

I have to work hard at keeping up with my social engagements, my volunteer work and catching up with friends. It is important that I do so.

Some days I have to push myself, I ask myself what is the worst thing that could happen, then question myself as to how likely is that to  actually happen? Once I get out the door and I am on my way somewhere I feel better.

Take little steps. Tell yourself that people have enough concerns of their own, so they are not all staring at you.

Instead of not eating anything when you are out, try eating just a little. You don't want to make a habit of feeling uncomfortable when you eat, that can cause all sorts of other problems.

Try some deep breaths when you are feeling anxious. Some people recommend counting backwards from 100 helps them, or try to think of something nice. Be aware of your anxious thoughts when they first start up and try to overcome them.

It helps me to write out how I am feeling at times and to share my thoughts and issues with others. So please continue to share here and like Chris mentioned, get in touch with the others who feel similar to you. You may all be able to help each other with ideas on how to cope.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

Community Member

Hi sarah272,

Thanks for posting here. I hope you are feeling okay about it. This is the first and only forum that I have ever taken part in and I can remember the struggle I had when I first joined. I too have some anxiety and like you have good days and good situations. I have actually made an appointment to see my doctor again next week because I am wondering if I can get more help with it. 

I am back at university doing a second degree and I know that the tutorials can be especially difficult. This is not helpful if there are marks for participation. It can also be unsettling when my mind freezes when I am called on to make a response and something senseless comes out. I find it a bit reassuring to remember that the others in the group are struggling with the same difficulties. 

I hope you persevere with your study.




Community Member

Hi Sarah,

I can relate to your post about anxiety, I spent most of my degree anxious and on edge for that moment I get asked a question or have to present my work in front of my class.

Some days I managed to rise above it and present myself in the opposite way to the way I was feeling.  I would project myself with confidence whilst my insides were churning away.  I had to have a safe quiet place to reside at home, uni and in public so that if I wasn't dealing, I could take a few moments in my safe place to regather my thoughts.  The main way I deal with my anxiety is acceptance that I'm feeling what I'm feeling

and then my next thought is if people 'even' notice does it really matter ? my answer is no it doesn't.  I do go through a cycle of re-assurance but the way I get through, really is knowing its how it is and the be kind and accepting of this anxious space and help ease myself through the time as the anxiety passes cause it does pass.  Recently I've taken medication for depression which has helped a lot but I do still get anxious, its just not as hard to deal with now.  If you can chat to your GP, he/she may have some suggestions.

I've always found exercise a good way to help get rid of the edginess of my feelings and positive affirmation. 

My friend had some humorous sayings that always helped, if its possible to shed some humour on everything, right down to imagining people in silly situations, it does that help.

I'm not sure if I've offered anything useful but wanted you to know, I understand and know this anxious space you've described x