Instead of harming myself I now........(list three of four dot points)

[Aaronsis]

Hi lovely people

I just wanted to start this thread as "self harm" seems to be an increasing topic that I have noticed lately.

Firstly there is some wonderful information at this link:

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/suicide-prevention/feeling-suicidal/self-harm-and-self-injur...

Some of the discussion I have been involved in I am hearing that the "techniques" that are suggested to people to do or use instead of hurting themselves is "silly", "don't work", "well if it was that easy I wouldn't be here". So I want to reach out to anyone and everyone to perhaps put down three or four or as many as you feel comfortable to, tips that DO WORK for you.

I have suggested smashing plates, in a controlled space of course and not your mum's best plates either! Do you think this would work?

I think knowledge is power and the more we share knowledge we can use it to help others and to make a difference, a real difference in someone else's healing.

I also understand this is a sensitive topic but if you feel comfortable to share what works for you or what you need in that time that stops you from hurting yourself that would be so helpful.

Please be mindful this is a sensitive topic so just dot point the things you do instead of hurting yourself.

Huge hugs to you all.

Sarah xxx

[Catz12]

Hello,

I apply mindfulness and meditation techniques to my daily life. It helps keep my stress levels and tolerance to stress levels down. When stress levels are low, we are less likely to experience depression. In regards to mindfulness, we treat all things as precious, such as yourself and other people. We also live in harmony with all things e.g. our own bodies. 

[Aaronsis]

Thank you so much for joining us here Catz12, you are so very right in that mindulness and taking time to listen to our inner feelings and inner thoughts and make peace with them, to address that the bad or negative ones are there but we need not do anything with them. Also to have some time for quiet and some time to reflect and also some time out from the everyday grind.

Thank you Catz12 for joining our conversation and hope to see you around the forum.

Hugs to you

Sarah

[pinwheel23]

I just wanted to say thank you for starting this thread Sarah. It's been nice reading about different 'tactics' to get through these feelings. Fortunately not a feeling I've felt in years, but I'd like to add a few that I don't think have been mentioned yet:

- squeezing/petting an old plushie toy (especially ones that are either fluffy or have velvet-y fabric)
- painting my nails
- making tea slowly: being really careful and mindful in stirring, when pouring the water, and taking slow sips
- applying hand cream; or I guess massaging yourself?

I hope everyone is feel safe and well today,
pinwheel23

[Aaronsis]

Thank you so much for your suggestions and what has worked for you in the past pinwheel23.

That is why I thought about this thread was that there are so many who currently try to resist and people who have been able to resist for a long time, either way any little suggestion could be something that really resonates with another person that they may not have thought about, so while it is a difficult thing to share and to talk about, it is very important too.

I am so happy to hear that this is not something you have had to feel or manage for a long time and that is wonderful.

Thanks for being part of the thread!

Hugs to you

Sarah

[Guest_4593]

Am i allowed to ask how people covered there harm, on a more full term solution , tattoo maybe?

[Aaronsis]

Hello Guest_4593

You can ask how people do cover or even make peace with their scars, as you say some cover with tattoos and one person I know even incorporated some of her scars to acknowledge where she has been and how far she has come, also not to have shame in her scars and they did represent a time in her life and that time no longer exists, but also to remind her that her mental health does need to be kept and eye on too.

Maybe some will join us here Guest_4593 and maybe speak of how they live with the scars they have.

It is so great you have joined us here and if you want to share more of your story we are here for you too, but only if you want to.

Great to chat with you Guest_4593.

Hugs to you

Sarah

[Matchy69]

Not all self harm is external and leaves scars that you can see. Mine are internal with no visible scars but the scars are there mentally.

[Aaronsis]

Great point Matchy69 and probably the most important place to ensure that scars that are mental are cared for the most. While it is true that physical scars leave a visual reminder, the internal pain and self dialogue can be just as big a wound to care for.

Thank you for reminding us of this Matchy69.

Hugs

Sarah

[Guest_4521]

Smashing plates COULD work...if you weren't going to be triggered by seeing the broken plates, if you know what I mean?

I suggest ripping up paper, especially if you self harm out of frustration or anger, or throwing paper balls at a wall. You can't really harm yourself or property with paper.

I know someone who would take a cricket bat and beat an old piece of furniture out in the back yard. It was going to the tip anyway.

When I was a teenager, I had a friend that would try to help my panic attacks and angry outbursts by just screaming at each other. No words, just screaming. Sometimes it would go until I cried, sometimes until my throat was so raw that no sound came out.

Once we were screaming at our normal place (empty football oval) and someone walked past and just stopped and stared at us. My friend saw them first and said "do you mind? We are HAVING A MOMENT, keep walking, mate" and I laughed. It really must of been awkward on the bystanders part.

Better out than in though.

[Guest_4521]

I covered my scars with tattoos. I got tired of feeling self conscious about them, they were pretty obvious.

You can still see one of them up close, but because of the optical illusion people standing a normal distance away wouldn't be able to tell it's not part of the tattoo, if that makes sense?