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Just_Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 703

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

Kazzl Helpful books and resources
  • replies: 103

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, sp... View more

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, specialist websites or blogs, podcasts, vodcasts or print or online journals or magazines. Please note BB has a list of websites and resources under Get Help, so maybe check there first for online resources. (Also note that we cannot include live links to online resources.) To make things easy to find, please put the category of the content first in bold, then the title of the book and then, if you want, a brief comment. Please note that anything listed here reflects the member's views only. Publications and other resources are not necessarily endorsed by beyondblue. Happy reading!

Chris_B Worried about other users - how are we all doing?
  • replies: 43

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences... View more

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences of others can be validating, because we feel 'we've been there', but sometimes it can also be a trigger for bringing up unpleasant feelings. I've started this thread so we can have a constructive discussion about helping others and helping ourselves - how do you cope when you read about others in distress? Do you have a self-care plan in place, and if so, what is it? Really looking forward to hearing from you all.

All discussions

white knight Men isolated
  • replies: 282

I'd like to hear from men. I want to know your inner feelings about anything that you feel isolated about. I'd like to know if you feel that the revolution towards equality of the sexes has gone too far to a point whereby you are feeling inferior to ... View more

I'd like to hear from men. I want to know your inner feelings about anything that you feel isolated about. I'd like to know if you feel that the revolution towards equality of the sexes has gone too far to a point whereby you are feeling inferior to women or you feel women are being treated better in any way - just because you are a man. Emotionally, are you feeling that you get enough support from females? Do you feel women are afraid to hug you to comfort you for any reason? like you'll take advantage of them? Do you have many female friends? Do you feel that women socialize better? What do YOU want socially? Feel free, talk, let go of your restraints, take advantage of the anonymous environment to let yourself be heard. We can do this and be in error, that our presumptions are ill directed and unfair. It could be our own inapproachability for example that can sway women away from us when we need them most. Are we misread? I know when I'm in conflict with someone I come across as a little aggressive or arguing in a normal male manner and that can portray someone that is not in need of support but is someone to avoid. NOTHING could be further from the truth. So that's one gripe. I feel women don't pursue the friendship care far enough. Such limited care results in my feelings of isolation. I think I'm a "giver" apart from my supportive wife no woman supports me anywhere near the level I give to them. Is this an illusion? What do you think? Two people. One a woman that enters a group, say a hobby group. She sits down and isn't feeling emotionally well. She is asked a question like "how is your day"? She burst into tears. The whole group of 10 ladies stand and hold her hand, hand on her shoulder, comforting and reassurance. She is not alone. They even ring her later and talk at length. The other person a middle aged male enters a motoring clubroom in his local town, his male friends restore cars and share drinks. He sits and realizes he was in no shape to attend. A guy asks him how his restoration is going. He is upset thinking about his car as due to his depression he hasn't been to his shed for weeks. He suddenly starts crying. The men, all of whom start to feel uncomfortable, mention a few things like" you'll get there don't worry". He is worried because he knows that half of the men there actually think he is a softy by crying, to stand clear of him because he has problems, to avoid him as it might upset their own happy day in the sun.... Tony WK

Doolhof VOLUNTEERING
  • replies: 23

There can be many benefits to volunteering, if it be weekly, monthly or even just as a once off experience. It must be extremely rewarding if you can travel over seas to volunteer, unfortunately that is not possible for everyone. There are so many di... View more

There can be many benefits to volunteering, if it be weekly, monthly or even just as a once off experience. It must be extremely rewarding if you can travel over seas to volunteer, unfortunately that is not possible for everyone. There are so many different ways and places to do volunteer work. It does not matter if you help overseas or locally, the difference you can make in a person's life is something that may be immeasurable. If you were to consider a volunteer role, where would you go? I have recently started at a Riding for the Disabled group in our region. I don't know much at all about horses. I didn't even know how to put a bridle on a pony let alone a horse. Some of the horses are so big! If anyone would like to share their comments and thoughts here, you are most welcome. Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

geoff Apologies
  • replies: 12

My Heartfelt regret that I've been absent for the last couple of weeks or more, as I've had to have plastic surgery. I will slowly return and I must say I'm sorry if anyone has been expecting a return reply from me but wasn't able to get. My apologie... View more

My Heartfelt regret that I've been absent for the last couple of weeks or more, as I've had to have plastic surgery. I will slowly return and I must say I'm sorry if anyone has been expecting a return reply from me but wasn't able to get. My apologies. Geoff.

calmseeker Ocular Migraines and anxiety
  • replies: 4

Hi All, Wondering if anyone experiences ocular migraines and has any info about them or ways to manage them? I have been having a lot lately and they are always accompanied with anxiety/panic attacks. They begin as a 'heat wave' like blurriness in my... View more

Hi All, Wondering if anyone experiences ocular migraines and has any info about them or ways to manage them? I have been having a lot lately and they are always accompanied with anxiety/panic attacks. They begin as a 'heat wave' like blurriness in my vison then progress to a 'kaleidoscope' type aura in my vison and then I lose vision in one eye. Episode lasts 15 -30 mins and vision returns to normal but I am left with difficulty forming a sentence, I can barely think of the words I want to say let alone say them. Strangely enough, I only ever get a dull head ache, not a painful one. Its very scary as it mimics stroke symptoms and I often have a panic attack along side the experience. Its making me very miserable and I find myself living in constant fear of it occurring. I have had blood work, optometrist visit and MRI to date. I would find it helpful to hear thoughts and experiences of anybody else who suffers with this.

Alexlisa Our lives are valid, whatever they look like
  • replies: 4

There’s a lot of expectations about how a ‘typical’ adult life should look. Career, partner, children, possessions... My life doesn’t look like this, but it doesn’t make it any less valid. Living with mental illness, or any chronic condition, can mak... View more

There’s a lot of expectations about how a ‘typical’ adult life should look. Career, partner, children, possessions... My life doesn’t look like this, but it doesn’t make it any less valid. Living with mental illness, or any chronic condition, can make it hard to meet these goals, so we often need to set our own instead. And these goals are just as important as other more ‘traditional’ life goals. Sometimes more so, because they can be so hard fought for. The way we live our lives is valid. I want to say that I always believe this strongly, but I’m human and sometimes I fall into the trap of comparing myself to others. I start to feel doubt about my worthiness and become fearful of sharing my own truths. Which is a bit sad because actually I think my life is a pretty interesting story to tell. At those times I let myself sit with the uncomfortable feelings, breathe and not fight against the thoughts, till they pass and I find my feet again. Our stories matter. Our goals matter. Our lives are valid. What is a goal you’re working towards that brings meaning to your life? They can be big or small - what’s important is that they matter to you.

giggywick hello everyone :) does anyone have tips for aspergers christmas
  • replies: 3

I'm sorry if this isn't the right forum to post in, but I didn't know where else to put this, this is the only mental health website I know of and I know this isn't about anxiety or depression so if this isn't the right place please tell me. Now that... View more

I'm sorry if this isn't the right forum to post in, but I didn't know where else to put this, this is the only mental health website I know of and I know this isn't about anxiety or depression so if this isn't the right place please tell me. Now that that's out of the way; I have Aspergers and I have trouble knowing how to receive gifts. Last year I got gifts I didn't want and I very blankly said that I didn't like it and my mum got so angry at me, it felt horrible because I couldn't understand really what I did wrong. That's why I went on this forum to receive advice on how to react to gifts so I don't get yelled at again. Any advice on how to at least pretend to be happy to receive gifts that I don't want or just how to avoid being nervous on when and how to say thank you for gifts and just social things that I cant understand would be much appreciated

Brodz33 Help
  • replies: 1

Hi I live with my partner and her family who r kiwis. Have a 5yr old dog. Wondering people's thoughts she has a big issue with my dog, (come her my boy) my boy etc every day constantly and he's my dog. Locks him in her room and seems very mental issu... View more

Hi I live with my partner and her family who r kiwis. Have a 5yr old dog. Wondering people's thoughts she has a big issue with my dog, (come her my boy) my boy etc every day constantly and he's my dog. Locks him in her room and seems very mental issue with my dog. I can't stand it, and my partner doesn't wanna hurt her mum. Like help???

Doolhof MY DAILY HAPPINESS EXPERIENCE
  • replies: 47

This thread has been inspired by Anny! Thanks for your encouragement. Each day I am going to try to write down "My Daily Happiness Experience" If any of you would like to add your own happy experiences, past or present or any comments, then please do... View more

This thread has been inspired by Anny! Thanks for your encouragement. Each day I am going to try to write down "My Daily Happiness Experience" If any of you would like to add your own happy experiences, past or present or any comments, then please do so. My Daily Happiness Experience today was putting on the sprinkler just for the native birds and then listening to their joyful song and chirping as they refreshed themselves. Happiness is knowing that no matter how hot and flustered I may be feeling, there is always an escape. I just have to look for it and make the most of the opportunities that come my way. From Mrs. Dools

quirkywords What is honesty and how does it affect your mental health?
  • replies: 213

I want to discuss what honesty means to you and your health. People say that they fake being well, or wear a mask so no one knows their pain.Is this being honest. When we do not admit our flaws and our behaviours does this make it harder to have insi... View more

I want to discuss what honesty means to you and your health. People say that they fake being well, or wear a mask so no one knows their pain.Is this being honest. When we do not admit our flaws and our behaviours does this make it harder to have insight into our illness and harder to get better? Do we need to be honest with ourselves and others in order to be well.? Honesty can be a very subjective personal word. What one people feels is being honest another may feel is not. For many years I was in denial about my illness so I would admit to myself I was ill, I was not honest. So what does honesty mean to you? So lets start a conversation. All ideas welcome. Everyone is welcome to comment, new posters, regular posters, I want everyone's ideas. Quirky