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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

All discussions

mercymaybe Getting rid of magical thinking
  • replies: 2

Though I'm going through a rough patch now, I thought I might share the thing that has enabled me to change and grow and speak up about my mental illness! and it's getting rid of magical thinking. whats magical thinking? it's the daydream that 'one d... View more

Though I'm going through a rough patch now, I thought I might share the thing that has enabled me to change and grow and speak up about my mental illness! and it's getting rid of magical thinking. whats magical thinking? it's the daydream that 'one day I will be back to normal'. it's focusing on an imagined recovery, versus living day to day. it seems harsh, but I cannot tell you how saying to myself 'ok if this is how it's going to be for the rest of my life, then I have to deal with it!' acceptance of being mentally ill, of dealing with the symptoms made all the difference to me. we talk a lot about society accepting mental illness, but as important is that we accept our own mental illness. once I was no longer battling myself, no longer thinking 'when I get better' if there is no better, then I still have to live! get on with my day to day life, just do the best I can. some people say it's a defeatist attitude but honestly it's not. being realistic and saying to myself, you've had these issues your entire life, you can't let the concept of 'recovery' hold you stagnant now... it made such a big change, and it was then that I was able, for the first time to begin accepting help. of course I still struggle, and this is really only applicable to those of us with long term mental health issues, but I encourage other people to look honestly at themselves and say 'rather then wait for recovery to live my life, I'm going to take it one step at a time and start now'

Miss-Anne-Throwpy Stuff is easier
  • replies: 1

Well looks like I'm out of the labyrinth. Pacing myself and stepping cautiously but am optimistic and that's just wonderful beyond description. To all those members who feel there is no way to claw out of that cold black pit of hell.... well, I've do... View more

Well looks like I'm out of the labyrinth. Pacing myself and stepping cautiously but am optimistic and that's just wonderful beyond description. To all those members who feel there is no way to claw out of that cold black pit of hell.... well, I've done it twice now... well once and a half as I'm not quite out of the woods yet, though I think I'm at the top of the hole for sure Centrelink was hard work given how bad I was so I gave up on that. The job agencies were sucky commercial clinics that just drove me nuts. I could and did do better without them. I actually did what I've been aiming to do for a year now, and that's get out of the line of work I've been in for over twenty years. Not only do I have a job that is kinder to my bipolar but it is close enough to home that I can walk and it also pays fractionally more than my last two jobs did. I save $ on public transport and I don't have to run the peak hour or CDB gauntlet with my agoraphobia.I can also afford my power, rent and medication now. The medication is working wonderfully. I'm so relieved. Definitely turned a corner.

Optimist_Prime True Friendships
  • replies: 4

In order to have a true friend, you first have to be a true friend. I've lived my life by that, because my Mom taught me that truth at a very young age. And for many years, I had so many close, beautiful friendships (and we are still in touch, but by... View more

In order to have a true friend, you first have to be a true friend. I've lived my life by that, because my Mom taught me that truth at a very young age. And for many years, I had so many close, beautiful friendships (and we are still in touch, but by facebook or some other online medium (sorry no offense beyond blue- you're awesome and you helps me and many others, but it's not the same as a close friend face to face or even the phone!))... but ironically, as I've gotten older, when I feel really down... I always realize that actually don't have anyone to call. Those that I might call, I actually know they don't truly care. I haven't had a real friend in many years. I am certain it is partly because I've pulled away from people due to hurt from failed friendships too many times, especially as I got older, it's like failed friendships became more painful... and there are probably many other factors. But now I'm not really sure how to go out and make a true friend again. I'm involved in a lot of hobbies and I know heaps and heaps of people from work, etc. But I feel like I've lost how to truly connect with one person. I think it is because I'm scared of being vulnerable. I think my facade of being strong and living a "successful" life is working too well (why do I put quotes on successful... well, I think success would be if I could feel content and give contentedness to the world, but society thinks success is based on other things- money in the bank, job, status, etc.... so people THINK I'm successful, but I know differently)... I'm too afraid to tear down my facade though... Why? Maybe a stupid reason, but I'll be honest. It is because there are people who prey on weakness.. and want those of us they view as strong to fail and those are the people I fear as they do hurt me.. regardless if I pretend they don't... I think everyone struggles with issues of different sorts, but most of us hide them. And it's good in a way, because you can't walk around feeling sorry for yourself... that is a very deep hole that perhaps you'll never climb out once you climb in, but it also doesn't allow you to have deep and meaningful relationships. Just curious of others thoughts on this massive topic? Thank you for "listening."

shootingstars1 What do you do to avoid a depressive episode? What do you need to feel better?
  • replies: 5

Do you take antidepressants? Do you use a treatment of antidepressants and psychotherapy? Are there any problems with fulfilling these needs? What else do you need to feel better? Feel free to share, information goes towards research project.

Do you take antidepressants? Do you use a treatment of antidepressants and psychotherapy? Are there any problems with fulfilling these needs? What else do you need to feel better? Feel free to share, information goes towards research project.

romantic_thi3f Making the crappy days less crappy
  • replies: 1

Hi all,I have a chronic illness and a mental illness so most days are a bit of a struggle for me. Most days I push, try and get some exercise, eat better, have difficult conversations, jump out of my comfort zones – etc etc you know the drill.But som... View more

Hi all,I have a chronic illness and a mental illness so most days are a bit of a struggle for me. Most days I push, try and get some exercise, eat better, have difficult conversations, jump out of my comfort zones – etc etc you know the drill.But somedays are really bad days. Those are the days when I’m sicker than usual, and all CBT have gone out the window and I’m thinking that I’m ‘not enough’ or just feeling downright miserable. But overtime I’ve kind of learned that it’s okay to have really crappy days. It doesn’t mean that I’m ‘relapsing’ or that I’m drowning in sadness, or that everyday is going to be like this one. It just means that it’s a bad day. I’ve also learned that there’s a number of things that help me so that my day doesn’t have to be totally and utterly crappy. Things like watching TV-reruns or comedies on Netflix, or pinning a thousand pins on Pinterest really help take my mind away from stuff. I also really like Spotify (a music streaming app) as the right song can help immensely. What about you? Is there anything that you can do to make your day just a little bit less crappy? If not, why don’t you create one? A toolbox that has things that cheer you up when you’re down. Because today won’t last forever.

Zeenath HYPNOSIS to help you
  • replies: 4

Hi there. I personally have gone through severe depression. At that time I was not totally aware that hypnosis could have helped me. Having said this, I did take medication for 2 yrs and whilst taking them I also went through Hypnosis. I could have s... View more

Hi there. I personally have gone through severe depression. At that time I was not totally aware that hypnosis could have helped me. Having said this, I did take medication for 2 yrs and whilst taking them I also went through Hypnosis. I could have stopped taking medications long time ago if I knew exactly how I could have avoided it. It was over a year but I mentally decided that I will stop my medications in 2 years. So I did but I did it gradually before I reached the end of my 2nd year.Now, I am pretty mentally stable and in-fact stronger than I can ever think of. . For this you have to be highly positive and of course, I have no doubt that hypnosis has also definitely helped me to be where I am now. I hope you would too get there one day. Thanks for reading and I wish you the best.

Denv12 Found Great Help......
  • replies: 0

For the last 2 years I have been using Acupressure to improve my overall wellbeing. It started when I read a book on Acupressure and I took an interest from there. The book is called:"Acupressure For Emotional Healing." By Michael Reed,Gach,Phd.Publi... View more

For the last 2 years I have been using Acupressure to improve my overall wellbeing. It started when I read a book on Acupressure and I took an interest from there. The book is called:"Acupressure For Emotional Healing." By Michael Reed,Gach,Phd.Published by Bantam books in 2004.ISBN:0553382438.The book shows various ailments and which pressure points to use.I also found a few websites that show a variety of diagrams,etc.About 4 months ago I read a book on "Emotional Freedom Technique." (E.F.T). I tried the technique.Bit long winded though. I Figured there has to be a quicker version. Looked online. Found one. Its called:"Faster E.F.T". (EFT stands for Emotionally Focused Transformations.)Since then I use "Faster E.F.T" everyday. We all have emotional issues so why not get rid of them.There is an internet forum catering for it,there are youtube videos showing how to do it.There are diagrams,etc.Just thought I'd share something that anyone can do.Its easy to learn.

white knight I'm tagged a nutter...what of them?
  • replies: 0

At least we have a description be it "nutter of a screw loose"? For just look at the many out there with no tag at all, free and legal to go about there -no shackle life. Cronic gamblers-these people can gamble their family's food budget, the electri... View more

At least we have a description be it "nutter of a screw loose"? For just look at the many out there with no tag at all, free and legal to go about there -no shackle life. Cronic gamblers-these people can gamble their family's food budget, the electricity money or even their home. If they don't fold in to seek professional advice then they go about life in their merry way Drinking excessively- well many do so and are not detected. Many hide it well. Stigma is there sure. Young people call it "fun" Obsessional people- they could be car fanatics, collectors, etc. They just have to have that car "its one of only 200 built" etc. Rarely do people get alarmed until there are more than 8 cars in a driveway fit for one. Poor money handlers- is that an illness? What about fraud? Criminals- jails are full of MI people Bullies- Up until recent years this was just tough luck if you were bullied. Only now these people/predators are being labelled in a negative manner. You get the picture. All of the above I suggest could be seen in a mental deficient state. All need counselling of various levels. All usually harm other people. Some will need medication, some psychiatric care etc. Yet none are seen in society with the level of stigma mental illness has. Ever seen a bully getting psychiatric treatment? Some might suggest to the likes of me, to not inform others of my mental state. That for some of us isn't easy. I feel, as part of my illness I need to speak my mind. Most times this is to people that are close to me, other times I blurt it out to some I regret telling. But that's me. Frankly I'm fed up with the judgements placed on what essentially is....me! My mental illness is part of me. And its just the history of stigma that separates us from the others. But there are other mental illnesses out there that fly under the radar that are not seen as mental illness unless it is at the extremes. Many of us are not extremely mentally ill. Which means to me that extreme behaviour of all of the above is deserving to be listed under the same umbrella, that of people needing major help. My point is, many people fail themselves and others around them. When we with mental illness fail ourselves or our family we cannot help it. It is out of our control. Then we are also normal people that need help and guidance. Just like the cronic gamblers and the alcoholics. We are all humans and we should all be listed together under society's caring hands....

Jacko777 Reaction VS Response
  • replies: 5

Dear Folks, I am always on a journey, on a recovery from depression, I have found some peace and happiness and I would love to share something that has helped me; knowing the difference between a reaction and a response. Well into my 30's my life had... View more

Dear Folks, I am always on a journey, on a recovery from depression, I have found some peace and happiness and I would love to share something that has helped me; knowing the difference between a reaction and a response. Well into my 30's my life had been shaped by my unchecked stinking thinking that had resulted from a serious life event. R.I.P. Mum. I had developed fears and phobias, I was depressed, anxious and angry. Instigated by my concerned loving partner I sought professional help. On my journey I have really looked at who I am, I have come closer to knowing what my true passions are and how the healthy me responds to life. Through research and meditation I have found 100% belief that I have a spirit, or soul, a spark of energy that drives and motivates me, it is completely unconditional love, it gives and gives, it is always there, it cannot disappear or be taken away. I have 100% belief that you also have the spark. So, to the question I ask myself...am I 'reacting' to a situation from an unhealthy mind or, am I responding to life from my loving spirit and calm mind that is free of conditioned thinking??? I think of the mind as a curtain in front of my spirit. I practice awareness that I am making this choice between reaction and response, I tell my self that I AM THE BOSS OF MY OWN MIND, I will take responsibility for making a choice and it will be the RIGHT choice, to forget the useless emotion of the mind that comes from uncontrolled thinking, to use my intelligent calm mind with the power of motivation and unconditional love. Respond...from the heart. Please don't think I have perfected this, that I have arrived anywhere, this is a practice, not a destination! To practice responding from the heart has helped me a lot so I thought I should share. Comments welcome. Love to you all! Jack

white knight Judging other people
  • replies: 1

I have a dear mate that has serious PTSD issues and is under heavy medication. Yesterday he posted on social media that he has great fears because a few doors down from his home new neighbours have moved in. These people "wear scarves and the men smi... View more

I have a dear mate that has serious PTSD issues and is under heavy medication. Yesterday he posted on social media that he has great fears because a few doors down from his home new neighbours have moved in. These people "wear scarves and the men smile at you all the time". He was, as he elaborated later refering to Australians with Arabic origin. After much thought overnight I replied to his entry. I reminded him of the worst firestorm in Australian history 'black Saturday' where neighbours of some residents that disliked each other for whatever reason helped each other and saved each others homes, their lives and in some cases...while their own home burned to the ground. I've been human also and in the past prejudged my neighbours only to find after some time they were the ones that came to my aid when a suspicious vehicle surveillanced the area. Then such neighbours became good friends. My point here is, many mental illness sufferers have issues with other people. It can be the sole reason why we "lock ourselves away", keep distant or are merely reserved. People can be hurtful, destructive and cunning. Some of us cant brave the bullying to just laugh it off. We are marshmellows and hence will never be walnuts with a hard protective case. I'm one of these people that have been hurt many times. I'm vulnerable mentally. It has naught to do with physical might- I don't lack there. When verbally challenged, time is my only friend. I simply cant get over the hurt easily and quickly. So what is the answer here? Well the likes of my sensitivity and fragility, walls need to be erected. There is no other solution but to erect these walls of defence to "minimalise" attacks...Better to erect walls with limited contact than hiding fully behind them with over reaction. You might be in this situation. Well for this exercise my walls have grown over many years. I have a wall when visiting the main street of our town.The wall is: meet a local I know, talk for only 2-3 minutes. Enough time to be courteous but not enough time for personal challenges eg "when are you going to come to this meeting...you have to be more active in our community". Another is a local knock on our door seeking support for our local politician "I'll certainly think about it" is my answer. Non committal. I don't have to commit then have it thrown back at me "you said you'd support us". Erecting small walls is ok if it means we can survive without locking ourselves away fully.