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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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white knight Crying, a gauge to our mental strength?
  • replies: 53

Reaching 60yo l can reflect on my early life and it is clear that my thousands of buckets l could have filled with my tears is in contrast to the period of post 2009. Why?. Diagnosed in 2009 with bipolar 2,depression, dysthymia and dwindling anxiety ... View more

Reaching 60yo l can reflect on my early life and it is clear that my thousands of buckets l could have filled with my tears is in contrast to the period of post 2009. Why?. Diagnosed in 2009 with bipolar 2,depression, dysthymia and dwindling anxiety meant the correct medication was prescribed. From then on it was more a case of fine tuning dosages. Last week l had the trauma of my youngest daughter leaving my life. She's 24yo and l have been tormented by this development BUT, I havent shead a tear. I feel it is a reflection of my newfound mental strength. Yes she has come and gone in my life but that fact doesnt mean it comes easy to cope with. What else could it be?. After much analysis l think acceptance of what life really is has helped. Life is not what we plan it to be nor wished. As kids we drew rainbows but not rocks. Life will throw stones, rocks, even boulders- without warning. Is our lack of being able to cope due to us expecting a smooth road in life? Or do we know life has hurdles but when they arrive its so devastating we have no learned skills to cope with them? At school we had no lessons in "coping with trauma" or "breaking up with your partner, how to do it with compassion and care" or "depression signs" etc.. even financial planning isnt taught. All these life challenges are learned the hard way. Some people can approach such challenges easier than others. So if you are sensitive, had a cruel upbringing, family history of mental illness and so on, you might let your tears become streams. Is it an indicator of your mental strength-lack of it? I suggest it could be. There is no worse feeling imo. That feeling of devastation, worthlessness, failure and mental collapse- crying. However I've known some people equally the same but not crying, with filming over their eyes as if deeply sad without tears so I'm not saying it is the case every time. If you have had a period of lots of crying, to work closely with your professional mental health expert with medication and therapy. Hopefully you'll improve and your stream of tears will dry up. Mine did so there is hope that your mental strength will return or develop even late in life. Accepting life has boulders will prepare yourself for them. Sh*t happens and its out if your control but you can develop strategies to cope better and a mentality that will look at life for what it is and always had been, unpredicable, hurtful but can be wonderful, incredible and more stable Tony WK

Guitarist Need to understand stuff.bipolar2
  • replies: 1

Hi all I have read all the literature out there about bipolar disorder and i am a little confused. I have been officially diagnosed with bipolar 2....but i don't get depressed?..my symptoms are i get so mentally exhausted from stress to the point it ... View more

Hi all I have read all the literature out there about bipolar disorder and i am a little confused. I have been officially diagnosed with bipolar 2....but i don't get depressed?..my symptoms are i get so mentally exhausted from stress to the point it effects my entire body and i end up with huge migraine head aches and absolute physical collapsed from fatigue and a very noticeable dip in my health to the point where it actually shows up on blood tests as an auto immune problem (not kidding i have proof). My point is that i think the doctor has diagnosed me incorrectly OR..can someone please let me know if this is what they experience with there condition? Or should I get another opinion? One more thing i would like to ask..is..when my thoughts race to the end of the world panic i get extremely angry...like really really angry...almost like a defense mechanism kicking in when i have shitty thoughts..which is kinda just as powerful as the bad panic. But..they are both things to have going on...which makes me think..why do i over think EVERY THING...is it to stop myself from drowning or boiling or both. By keeping myself occupied? And why do i constantly blame people for this stuff...not that i ever tell them because i keep it to myself. I sound so rounded at the moment. But this cycles every 3 days....the headaches are every few weeks.. the physical assault is unbearable..medication does nothing..instead of my stuff coming in every 3 days....it drags out over weeeks..at least this way i have some kind of control. I wish it would all go away because i can't really keep going like this....I'm 37...have a wife have children...i used to work...had a job for 7 years in the one place...before that 6 years...now there is no work...anywhere...i have applied for over 147 jobs since January last year..no luck. I no longer know how to talk to people anymore because i have been out of the work force for so long. I never was a social butterfly anyway. How do i fix this? I don't think i can.. Thanks

Divinci First time poster, just need to vent on recent times
  • replies: 5

Hey everyone, Not really sure where to start or what to say but here goes... the last few weeks i have been extremely tired and had no motivation to do anything and i was beginning to feel quite feint, thinking it might be diabetes i went and got som... View more

Hey everyone, Not really sure where to start or what to say but here goes... the last few weeks i have been extremely tired and had no motivation to do anything and i was beginning to feel quite feint, thinking it might be diabetes i went and got some tests due to my background being Maori and my dad and others having diabetes i thought it would be wise. I explained this to my boss via message which took me forever to press send and then i anxiously awaited a reply, in which he said health comes first just keep in touch which made me calm down a lot. so i have had the past over a week off due to this as well. Knowing i had to return to the doctors this morning for results i was up majority of the night with anxiety worrying/tossing and turning about my results which then lead to me stressing about work and money etc etc. Then i heard my mum awake in the kitchen so i crawled out of bed to go talk to her and have a smoke and i explained about my anxiety which i have never mentioned before as i am quite a secretive person and i guess hate to think that i'm dumping my problem on others. she then mentioned to me that i should say something at the doctors when i get my results. Finally getting to sleep and waking up for the doctors (which was a huge struggle) i went to my appointment with severe anxiety of my results which came back with no diabetes for now but a high chance of me getting them at some point. after i received them i mentioned my anxiety and she asked a few questions about how i feel like, tired/lethargic, motivation, work etc which all got a high answer on her 1-5 scoring chart so she gave me a referral to see a psychologist because she thinks it definitely is depression and worsening from what i explained. I feel a lot better knowing i have taken a step to do something about it, but now my fear is in my job, i cannot even bring myself to call or message my boss to explain what is going on or when i will come back to work and then i feel i "HAVE" to force myself to go because i am stressing about money and its just a viscous circle that keeps going around that i cannot escape. I find my only escape from reality and my issues that makes me feel better are video games, i feel i can really escape when playing and i would much rather interact with other gamer's online than face people in reality. it is pretty much the only time i relax and literally don't think about anything at all.

Debzmites Plan B - women?!
  • replies: 13

I'm 36 in October, single and struggle with depression, anxiety and BPD. I'm still trying to clear debt and don't think I have anything to offer a make or family. I'm just starting to think maybe it's time to give up hopes of a family and starting to... View more

I'm 36 in October, single and struggle with depression, anxiety and BPD. I'm still trying to clear debt and don't think I have anything to offer a make or family. I'm just starting to think maybe it's time to give up hopes of a family and starting to think what are things to plan and aim for if this is the case? Anyone else faced this situation?

MWV It's time to try something else
  • replies: 1

Hi, I am a 40 year old guy, 3 beautiful kids and I have an amazing wife. Not loving my career right now - considering a change (if I can figure out what I want to do). Often stressed, I tend to binge on alcohol and I suffer from anxiety and depressio... View more

Hi, I am a 40 year old guy, 3 beautiful kids and I have an amazing wife. Not loving my career right now - considering a change (if I can figure out what I want to do). Often stressed, I tend to binge on alcohol and I suffer from anxiety and depression. I've been on medication for 15 years which helps but the roller coaster of this illness is probably the hardest. I exercise a lot, I eat well and try and be the best person I can be, but this feeling of sadness, being lost and being depressed just creeps back in. No doubt the booze doesn't help, so I will endeavour to once again make changes there. I never really though about a mid-life crisis as I kind of still see myself as young (and I act it), but I'm definitely going through something, and it is affecting my family. So now I need to sort this out...... Adding to the already chaotic life that we live with 3 kids under 6, I need to be strong and helpful to my wife, not another pain for her. She is the rock in our family and I hope one day I can let her know just how much I appreciate everything she does for everyone. One thing I'm now going to do is head to a health retreat for 5 days or so and get some perspective. Has anyone else done this? I would prefer Melbourne based. I've read up on a few and love the idea of exercise / good food / talking and tackling mental health / working through over indulgence and addictions / stress / being overwhelmed / psychological health etc. I hope this can be a good next step.... Any thought? Matt

anqly I don't know what I get to Bipolar or Depression or anything else?
  • replies: 6

Hi, I am An This is not easy for me to get communicate and reach my feeling to people here. First at all I must apologies for my poor English. I don't know what I get to, It's been like a week or more I don't know. I have been sad, insecure, depress ... View more

Hi, I am An This is not easy for me to get communicate and reach my feeling to people here. First at all I must apologies for my poor English. I don't know what I get to, It's been like a week or more I don't know. I have been sad, insecure, depress and untrusted to people. Whenever I playing game or working on design I didn't think anything but when I leave it, I keeps thinking and worries about my relationship matters. I do not have much friend (just one at the moment) I like to make friend with local people to talk in English but those people won't stay long they keep ignore or barely talking with me. My family is another story. I been with them like forever I just finally move out last year and when I with them we talking in Vietnamese. I didn't go out or make any friend because they never gave me a break time to make friend. my life was work, home and study. 24/7 is a big circle and it makes me sick. I am a type of person like to out and see how the world running, want to trying and knowing everything (yes I am very open person) So go back to friendship, I do go out to know people, I did to use social network I also did try hookup app (I know most people here is not worth to know) but people like just chatting little bit and do not talk again. newest thing here I have know a person on social network we makes friend for long time but never talk (just play game together) then I contact him talking a bit and everything very cool yes like a great conversation but then next day when I login back he is out of my friend list. I was unbalance these days, very sad, unhappy and do not wanna do anything when I go to work it is very boring me and I just do not wanna do anything just do something boring to killing time. my workmate did try to cheer me up but it just work like a bit then I get down again. My feeling very unstable now sometime high some time low and down I did not upsetting or feel tired. I just dont care and do not want to do anything at all. also I been less sleeping time like 4 or 6 hours only. this Monday I been stay awake until 3am and wake up at 6am. I do not interesting to eat anything just eating because hungry and I did eat a bit. I did book an appointment to see GP but it take like 20 days later. I think I will take a day off tomorrow to sightseeing to cheer me up but I don't know is it make me better. I plan to watch a movie I love a most tmr but I scare a side effect. because I want to watch with my friend.

ageofbackwards numb
  • replies: 4

I have been fighting this disease for almost 10 years and I feel like I can't do it anymore. My medication has left me numb. Brain dead. little feeling at all. I can't do anything. I spend my days sleeping. It's not a life. I don't know what to do.. ... View more

I have been fighting this disease for almost 10 years and I feel like I can't do it anymore. My medication has left me numb. Brain dead. little feeling at all. I can't do anything. I spend my days sleeping. It's not a life. I don't know what to do.. Im tired of fighting.

Xanda Bipolar and Pregnancy.
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, So late last year I was diognosed with bipolar disorder. My medication was changed and life has been improving and generally great. i found out a few weeks ago that I am pregnant (very unexpected as it has a less than 5% chance of happen... View more

Hi everyone, So late last year I was diognosed with bipolar disorder. My medication was changed and life has been improving and generally great. i found out a few weeks ago that I am pregnant (very unexpected as it has a less than 5% chance of happening) but as a result I have been taken off all my medication I have an appointment with my psychologist next week, but I'm finding everything a huge struggle. I don't sleep, my moods are terrible and my thoughts are dark. As a first time mum I'm terrified as it is, but putting the lack of medication, no sleep and pregnancy symptoms together I am an absolute mess. Is there anyone who has or is experiencing something like this? Or anyone with any advise on how to get through the next week before my appointment? i would really appreciate it. thank you

LolyWorm Bipolar, Centrelink and finding a job. Advice?
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I've been a long time reader, but haven't posted here for a long time. I am after help, advice or just a few words. Honestly I feel very al one with my issues because I don't know anyone with any mental illness and it's very alienating. ... View more

Hi everyone, I've been a long time reader, but haven't posted here for a long time. I am after help, advice or just a few words. Honestly I feel very al one with my issues because I don't know anyone with any mental illness and it's very alienating. So I've had depression and anxiety since I was 15, diagnosed at 17, then when I was 25 I was diagnosed with rapid cycling bipolar type 2. I've been trying to get my own business going, but it's slow obviously, so in the meantime I looked into getting on the disability support payment through Centrelink. It was rejected and I'm now on Newstart allowance (I absolutely loathe being on Centrelink by the way). In November I had another relapse which included bouts of violence, anger, mania and severe depression. I'm still not back to what I was earlier last year, but I'm very slowly getting there. So I want to start finding a job part time job again to help me out until I can get back to work on my business. So I ask, how did anyone here find a job, or keep one with any mental illness and have your dealings with Centrelink been as discriminating as mine? I've basically been called a liar because I'm a very good actress and put on a brave face in public, when I rarely go out. And one woman from a job support centre actually told me to suck it up. My psychologist and psychiatrist recommend I only work 10 hours a week, which seem so low I won't ever find a job that's under 20 hours a week. Sorry for the long rant! And thanks in advance.

Vorbis How to not think too much
  • replies: 5

Hi I have a slightly weird form of depression that I searched for but didn't see much come up about. Anyone else get existential depression? I tend to have long patches where I'm doing fine, and then stumble into existentialism and wonder what the po... View more

Hi I have a slightly weird form of depression that I searched for but didn't see much come up about. Anyone else get existential depression? I tend to have long patches where I'm doing fine, and then stumble into existentialism and wonder what the point of it all is. I had a weird childhood because I had a perfect memory. Made me have to do things differently because I'd be forced to live with the consequences of my actions forever. It also meant that I had limited space for what I'd give my attention to - I really struggled with other children who changed their minds constantly and contradicted themselves daily (I'm friends with Sophie! Now I'm not! Actually we're all a giant group of friends except we hate Alex!) I'd get sick from having to live with all the mismatched data. They weren't even lying! They just changed their minds, and that constantly rolling game was the point of their world. It wasn't mine. Fortunately I had a son when I was 26, and then became a single mum. He never slept, and was still waking up seven times a night when he was one and a half years old. Turns out they use sleep deprivation as a form of torture because it completely destroys a person. Far from an eidetic memory, I have no memories at all for the first three years of his life. So now my mind is a much happier place. I can mess things up and forget about it! But I occasionally slip back into wondering what the point of it all is (the What is the meaning of life question I was driven to answer, back when answering it was a genuine possibility). And it makes me find all the small things I do day to day pointless. Does anyone know how to stop sliding into big picture thoughts? It feels very similar to meditation. So... how to not meditate?

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