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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Debzmite Genetic testing
  • replies: 1

Have you done it? they can tell you which diseases you're open to and help with diet and treatment options - $760 total

Have you done it? they can tell you which diseases you're open to and help with diet and treatment options - $760 total

Tim1976 Feeling very isolated and bored at home
  • replies: 2

I am currently on disability and am at home most of the day. I do have friends but they are a long way away. I have tried to go to the library and do other things but can't seem to find anything to distract or occupy myself. My medication is giving m... View more

I am currently on disability and am at home most of the day. I do have friends but they are a long way away. I have tried to go to the library and do other things but can't seem to find anything to distract or occupy myself. My medication is giving me brain fog and I keep drooling but not sure what I can do about that. I am sleeping but not sure if straight through and I keep going to bed so early I wake up early. I just want something to look forward to so I don't feel like I am wasting my time.

Shev Newbie, starting to finally get things out of my head
  • replies: 3

Most nights I lie in bed telling myself how useless I am, I am not worth anything, the world will still function without me. I am working full time and studying at nights where I find myself easily distracted. Then I start hitting myself (just with w... View more

Most nights I lie in bed telling myself how useless I am, I am not worth anything, the world will still function without me. I am working full time and studying at nights where I find myself easily distracted. Then I start hitting myself (just with words) saying how useless I am, why didn’t I just study and do the work. Why can’t I? Not doing the work just makes me stay up the next night, but the same thing happens. Why can’t I just do the work!! I could then go to bed with my wife, she must feel lonely, it is my fault. I am useless. I am a useless, no hoper Idiot. It’s not just study. Why couldn’t I ring that person today for work, why couldn’t I pick up the phone and ring? Why couldn’t I send that email, I now what I need to say and do, why can’t I do it? I know my manager thinks I can’t do my job. I know I can, but why can’t I? Am I a failure? I do have a beautiful family that I love dearly. My kids love me, I think, no yes they do (why do I sometimes think that they wouldn’t?). My wife says she loves me. So why do I think that she would be better off without me? I feel sometimes that my kids might be better off without me, but I know they would be better with me. I keep waiting for my wife to tell me that’s it, that I am useless and she has found someone else that makes her happy. But she hasn’t yet? Why can’t I talk to my wife about this? I go through all these emotions at night, and tell myself that in the morning I will talk to someone about this. Then in the morning I feel fine. I say to myself, that I am just being an emotional cry-baby at nights get over it you idiot, your fine. I tell no-one. What is the difference between depression / anxiety and it just being the person you are? What if what I feel is just me, not some disorder that can be fixed? Can being shy, intrinsic and wanting to be alone be mistaken for depression? What if I am imagining these depression feelings to hide what I am? What If I am trying to mask the person I am (compared to the person I want to be) by trying to make myself think I have depression / anxiety, which stops me being the person who I want to be? I feel like I am useless, what if I actually am? What if going down the path of trying to find if I have depression / anxiety I find that I do not have it? And I am really just a hopeless, useless idiot? Would it be easier to have something to hold on to to blame than find out the truth that I am a failure?

CJs_mum just rambling here: depression and frustration (and a trigger warning!)
  • replies: 7

hi just going over (and over and over) old stuff here I know...and all I have has been written about already, but I still can't seem to work, move, be a part of the world, focus, feel, try. There have been some brilliant posts about how to overcome t... View more

hi just going over (and over and over) old stuff here I know...and all I have has been written about already, but I still can't seem to work, move, be a part of the world, focus, feel, try. There have been some brilliant posts about how to overcome that feeling of "nothingness", having a bad day or just feeling like there's something missing in your heart and finding something to fill it. I thank you all for posting up the initial question or feeling - very brave of you - and to all those who replied with helpful tips or how you feel too/your agreement - you guys rock!.... But.... I'm going to be "Norbert the Negative" here and say what if even THEN you can't get up and move - do something or feel anything at all? What if you've tried everything and just blah - you just feel blank all the time anyway? I mean ALL the time. Not just "having a bad day" or being a little down for a couple of days, i mean 24/7 every day of the year. Ok sometimes i feel a bit happy, sometimes I even show that, but mostly inside, i have no feelings at all. There's just nothing. Background here - forgive me for rambling and making NO sense....i haven't been able to be all that amicable with others, communicate clearly and with well-thought out answers, think straight or even be comprehensible for a while now: I'm not on drugs (meds, nor that illegal shite)! I do sleep, but lately that sleep is all over the place and tonight I've had none at all. That's kinda normal for me - mainly due to the points above and below. Relationships: I have an amazing, wonderful, laid-back, easy going, patient and very supportive boyfriend. He's amazing....but i hate to say this, I don't feel anything for him. It's not that I don't love him! I do, well, i think i do. I really appreciate him, for sure! He's like no one I've ever met! He's so good to me, treats me beautifully, the way I've always wished I could be treated....So why am I not happy? Its frustrating. I don't feel something - I don't feel the way he shows me love. It's weird. I never used to be like this. I would give my heart 100% to those around me and was abused for it, now I'm being treated well, I just cant give even 1% - or it seems to me that way. To be continued...

Artistaffame I dont know who I am
  • replies: 3

A bit of a back story. I came from a dysfunctional family. At 11 my dad left and around that time I became my mums fulltime carer. She had a baby a few years later and I quit school and started raising him while taking care of her. I took care of her... View more

A bit of a back story. I came from a dysfunctional family. At 11 my dad left and around that time I became my mums fulltime carer. She had a baby a few years later and I quit school and started raising him while taking care of her. I took care of her for 23 years and he's now a 21 yo. She passed away last year and I've since been diagnosed with depression anxiety and PTSD. Today after getting into an argument with my brother (he was angry at me) I realized I have no idea of who I really am. I dont know what I like or what I pretend to like. I always seem to go along with whatever other people are saying. I never disagree with anyone because I dont want them to hate me. I know the relationship with my mum was codependent i would never get mad at her in case she got mad or it caused an arguement. I also act different and my likes chsnge depending who im with. Im so confused right now

Gatherer Overwhelmed
  • replies: 4

I am a mum of 4, with a husband who hasn't worked for 10 years due to mental illness. i recently lost my well paying job. i have depression, badly managed diabetes 2, unfit, poor diet, poor sleep, on heaps of medication for thyroid, diabetes, depress... View more

I am a mum of 4, with a husband who hasn't worked for 10 years due to mental illness. i recently lost my well paying job. i have depression, badly managed diabetes 2, unfit, poor diet, poor sleep, on heaps of medication for thyroid, diabetes, depression, cholesterol, triglycerides, migraines. feeling really hopeless and struggling with motivation.

interloper Sehnsucht: An Epiphany
  • replies: 5

I've been doing a lot of reading trying to find a placeholder for how I feel. I came across a reference to 'sehnsucht'. This post is for those who haven't come across it before. It is a German word for an emotion that we don't have a direct translati... View more

I've been doing a lot of reading trying to find a placeholder for how I feel. I came across a reference to 'sehnsucht'. This post is for those who haven't come across it before. It is a German word for an emotion that we don't have a direct translation for in English. It fits me perfectly. It is loosely defined as 'longing', but it is much more than this. I found a paper that defined it with six characteristics. 1. Utopian conceptions and striving for an 'ideal life' 2. A sense of being incomplete 3. It transverses the past, present and future 4. It is bittersweet in nature, and can drive you in good and bad ways 5. Promotes reflection on one's life 6. Closely connected with symbolism It shares some symptoms with depression. You are not happy. You see flaws in yourself that originated in the past and the impacts of them will extend into the future. You can oscillate between being energetic (sub-manic in my case I think) and deeply down. You reflect on life and its value. But it is different. It is grounded in a positive origin: to seek a life that is a personal utopia, strive for excellence, or chase dreams. It is the nature of this reality that causes people experiencing sehnsucht to feel excited and energetic when their goals become closer but bitterly despondent when they realise that they will never reach it because it is impossible. It is like chasing the end of a rainbow. Also, these actions are not meant to produce a tangible outcome, but rather a symbolic one. Someone who is depressed and the catalyst for these feelings is a certain thing or things usually is looking for a simple cause and effect result. Get better job, earn more money, enjoy things. Improve relationship with partner, have more fulfilling relationship, feel better about oneself. With sehnsucht though it is not of this nature. One may strive for a better job for better pay to achieve freedom. Or want to improve their relationship with their partner to understand love as it relates to the human condition. These things can never be achieved fully, and so there is sense of disappointment every time there is a reminder of this.

LisaT Bipolar Diagnosis
  • replies: 8

Hi Last year I had a manic episode with psychotic features. I ended up in hospital for 3 weeks. I have been experiencing a low since roughly July last year...no pleasure in past activities, lack of motivation, little energy, etc This week I went to s... View more

Hi Last year I had a manic episode with psychotic features. I ended up in hospital for 3 weeks. I have been experiencing a low since roughly July last year...no pleasure in past activities, lack of motivation, little energy, etc This week I went to see my psych and asked him straight out what was wrong with me. He told me I had bipolar 1. He adjusted my meds which I hope works. My episode was triggered by long term high stress. Has anyone else been diagnosed with bipolar?

Mawkish Depression triggered by something I enjoy
  • replies: 2

My depression is caused by someone I like or indulge in, even though I still consciously try to avoid that person when I'm away from them for a while. It's a cycle. It only comes back when I see the person, despite the fact that I love this person. M... View more

My depression is caused by someone I like or indulge in, even though I still consciously try to avoid that person when I'm away from them for a while. It's a cycle. It only comes back when I see the person, despite the fact that I love this person. My depression case is really strange and abnormal as it's rather "contradictory".

Mystera What is happening to me?
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I feel that I need to talk to others as beside my work counselor there is no one out there I can really talk to. History: I met my partner a year ago when her then very ill mother she was looking after died not soon after we met. Attraction w... View more

Hi all, I feel that I need to talk to others as beside my work counselor there is no one out there I can really talk to. History: I met my partner a year ago when her then very ill mother she was looking after died not soon after we met. Attraction was instant and love developed soon after. I lived in a big city and had nice circle of work mates with whom I had good social interactions daily. My partner was in deep grief and decided to move in with me pretty much as soon as we met, to be away form her family and to be able to process her grief. I experienced her mostly sitting on the lounge, after late night stay awake and late mornings, daily. Her main hobby/pattern is to read on her tablet (rarely let this thing down). She told me that she likes reading and that she is big introvert and sociophobe. She is more on a quite side person. In time she was staying at my place we have had some good fun but still didn't go out much at all.She also shared with me some horrific abuse stories from her past, mental issues she had and that she is on the very strong dose of pain medication. I find her more on a quiet side. After six months living together she suggested to me to move to much smaller town with her (where she was born) to be closer to her old and very fragile dad.I accepted and we moved 3 months ago. I have same full time job here and she is not working as she hasn't been for last 2 years because of looking after her ill mom 24/7. She sold her house couple of years ago and she has been using that money in every day life, money that is slowly fading away. I am on a steady job but below average pay. While living with me I was covering all bills and she was contributing by buying a groceries. Since we moved here life has been very stressful. Constant work on the house, my new work was totally unprepared for my start so I felt extremely frustrated and unsupported. She tried her best to work at home along with me but it is hard for her as she is quite unorganised person, so there is a lot of mess inside of the house. Opposite of her I am very organised person and need some order to be able to feel comfortable in my surrounding.