Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
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Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
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I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

Lilac1 Hidden Depression
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I’m not sue where to exactly start, or what to exactly say, but I need to express my feelings and emotions. I’m lost, and feel stuck. I’m “happy” one day and extremely down another day. I don’t feel I’m truly happy with myself or my life, everyone is... View more

I’m not sue where to exactly start, or what to exactly say, but I need to express my feelings and emotions. I’m lost, and feel stuck. I’m “happy” one day and extremely down another day. I don’t feel I’m truly happy with myself or my life, everyone is living and I feel stuck. I want to enjoy life, find my passion, love the relationships in my life but I just can’t. I want to achieve things, be truly happy. I want that more than anything. I just am stuck, I don’t see any jobs that truly is what I can do, my anxiety plays a part but it doesn’t fully control me. I want to succeed, get a job, find true friends, live a life of me being truly happy within myself but I don’t know how. My anxiety hurts me when I need to recharge after lots of social interaction even with my partner, which he doesn’t understand because he is the opposite he can’t be alone. I have my passions that keep me going which is art, poetry and basketball but I feel my feelings have even affected those things. I am one of those people who just want to make everyone happy, because it makes me happy so when I am having a down day I just hide it because there is really nothing they can do, and me seeing them happy instead of worried is helps me more. I just feel lost and you reading this can probably tell I’m all over the place. I’m just sad, down about a lot of things and I’m trying to find my way out. Thank you for reading my confusing mess and I hope if anyone feels similar you are not alone

arrgent Pretending I was never depressed?
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I was just wondering if anyone had experience with this... I don't really have much of a support network. I have BPD and PTSD and regularly have mood swings that take me from extreme highs to lows. It's usually pretty situational, but lately I've bee... View more

I was just wondering if anyone had experience with this... I don't really have much of a support network. I have BPD and PTSD and regularly have mood swings that take me from extreme highs to lows. It's usually pretty situational, but lately I've been having lows regardless of what's happening and then just coming out of them. But, what happens when I come out of my lows it feels like they never happened. It's almost like a switch was turned on and I can see clearly again. I'll be laying on my couch, feeling like my world is ending, then almost instantly I sit up and feel like I can conquer the world again? There doesn't seem to be a trigger to this, but does anyone have experience with this and can offer me some advice? I feel like it makes me look like I'm faking.

Dodooo Lost in the mist
  • replies: 2

Hi, I was raised in the society for which the word depression is just a fancy way of doctor taking Fee from a patient and nothing else. I am living among people with same mindset. I am blessed in many ways as I got parents who love me most and would ... View more

Hi, I was raised in the society for which the word depression is just a fancy way of doctor taking Fee from a patient and nothing else. I am living among people with same mindset. I am blessed in many ways as I got parents who love me most and would do anything in world to keep me happy and safe but I can’t say anything to them or show them a face which isn’t smiling as they are so far away and old , that this will become unbearable for them. I have a beautiful little girl who loves me a lot but since loss of my first baby due to negligence of people in my life, I have been left feeling every single day for past 7 years that why it was him and not me who was put in that grave. I don’t know how to cope with my situation. I passed 4 initial years by drowning myself in work 24/7 but for last 3 years I have left job to raise my girl and day by day I am making my life more miserable. When she is around me I work like a person whose sole purpose is to raise her and keep her happy but when she isn’t around I feel blank. I feel like I have been put in a box where there is silence and no one can hear me scream.

Rhu Feeling worthless and lost
  • replies: 6

Hi all, For the past year my mood has been pretty bad. After graduating and starting my first full time job, things just haven't been going well. I struggled with the job in my first workplace, and was eventually asked to leave. I managed to find a p... View more

Hi all, For the past year my mood has been pretty bad. After graduating and starting my first full time job, things just haven't been going well. I struggled with the job in my first workplace, and was eventually asked to leave. I managed to find a position elsewhere, but things haven't been going much better there, and now I'm very much at risk of losing this current position as well. For some reason I struggle to perform the necessary tasks, and both my past boss and current one feel that I'm not making any improvement. I find it hard to focus, and I feel tired and unmotivated all the time though I get plenty of sleep at night. This has triggered some anxiety issues, which I thought I had overcome prior to starting the job. I had severe anxiety issues several years back due to some deaths/illnesses in the family, which slowly went away, and then came back in the middle of last year. Now I keep getting these moments when I feel completely useless and worthless, and I'm convinced that everyone would be much better off without me. I compare myself with my relatives and friends and think of how successful they are while I'm struggling just to hold down a job. My late granddad was a greatly successful man and though I know he loved me, I keep getting these thoughts that he was ashamed of me for not being as smart and confident as his other grandchildren. At times I think that my parents are constantly disappointed in me for not achieving anything in my life. Sometimes I feel like breaking down completely and at times I can cry for no apparent reason when I think about my life. I feel like I'm going nowhere and I just want to leave everything behind and hide away in a corner indefinitely. I haven't been officially diagnosed with anything, and I'm just terrified that if I see my GP she'll tell me I have depression or GAD. Can someone pls talk me through this? I'm too embarassed to talk to my friends/family and I don't know how long I can keep on going like this. Thanks in advance.

Hmin Depression and work and relatives
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hi, i am new, I have been in my job for well over 20 years but my bosses are coming down heavily on me because as many will know job environments have changed over time where bosses are now more focused on rules, red tape and bureaucracy than actual ... View more

hi, i am new, I have been in my job for well over 20 years but my bosses are coming down heavily on me because as many will know job environments have changed over time where bosses are now more focused on rules, red tape and bureaucracy than actual results. The bosses say my work is "wonderful" but are critical because I don't appear "UP" and I am "late" (it is the public service it 's supposed to about flexi time) all that aside the atmosphere now is very tense and I feel paranoia and more depressed than I already have been for many many years ....(I am 51 years old) I have problem relatives also. I wonder whether I should try harder to get the sack or resign....I know I should see a doctor..but I have before and taken anti-depressants that didn't work. If i go back to a doctor to try and help me get out of work it will involve many trips will become costly? I can't afford it I don't know what to should I just run away?

white knight Workplace absenteeism
  • replies: 13

Depression is one of the major contributors to mounting sick days. Its as if, we will get better, then we wont take so much time off. But its short lived. The ramifications are big. Your boss increases his frustration whether you know it or not, it w... View more

Depression is one of the major contributors to mounting sick days. Its as if, we will get better, then we wont take so much time off. But its short lived. The ramifications are big. Your boss increases his frustration whether you know it or not, it will be there. As 80% of people have little empathy for mental illness, you might regret exposing your reasons for time off. The whole saga gets worse over time. What are your options? Drop full time work- consider casual or part time. In some situations your boss might agree with this concept. A friend of mine had a boss that actually preferred a 4 hour shift 11am to 3pm at a call centre to cover full time workers lunch break.. If you can secure a couple of part time jobs you will have more variety and sometimes more total income but less security. Another tactic to rise in the morning is baby steps. When I worked in my own business I had to rise at 3am then drive 1-3 hours to my workplace. When first waking up to the alarm if I thought about the drain of the next 3 hours I'd stay in bed. My method was to focus just in getting into the shower. Hot water stimulates you, helps you wake up. Remember breakfast. Confidentiality - your workmates will judge you negatively. You owe them nothing. I always go on a "need to know" basis. "Just personal problems" as a reply to gossipers covers a lot of possibles. Let them guess. Trust one colleague and rumours will flow. Holidays- make them count. Being idle or working at another job is not taking a break. Google Topic: holidays- beyondblue Topic: cheap recovery idea, camping- beyondblue Following many sick days off you might have to take a punt and disclose to your boss your predicament which means telling him/her about your illness amd how you have battled with it. This happened to my friend that worked in retail. His travel time was one hour by train and a 15 minute bus. His boss had a wife with depression and sympathized. He arranged a transfer to a store closer to home. It was the answer. Taking sick days isnt ideal. Discuss medication and sleep patterns with your doctor. Restructure your life, consider all options and limit your guilty feelings. And try one step at a time starting with a long shower. Tony WK

Redlight Breaking
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Hi Im not sure where to start really. I’m 30 years old, married with 4 small children. I used to be happy, excited about life. I’m just ridiculously sad and miserable all the time now. I can’t envision anything in the future ever exciting me again. I... View more

Hi Im not sure where to start really. I’m 30 years old, married with 4 small children. I used to be happy, excited about life. I’m just ridiculously sad and miserable all the time now. I can’t envision anything in the future ever exciting me again. I honestly feel like life is breaking me. I feel like I really need to talk to someone but then so much crazy shit goes on in my head i can’t tell that to anyone! I don’t know what to do or how to learn to be happy with my life. Does anyone else feel like this? I don’t know how I’m going to get through the rest of my life sometimes.

bigstar existential side of the illness
  • replies: 6

So, after having rather acute anxiety for as long as I can remember (my first memories are panic attacks in benign situations) I have thought that maybe I do have this awful chemical imbalance. Despite my anxiety, I have forced myself to do things th... View more

So, after having rather acute anxiety for as long as I can remember (my first memories are panic attacks in benign situations) I have thought that maybe I do have this awful chemical imbalance. Despite my anxiety, I have forced myself to do things that seemed unendurable because I have a pretty overdeveloped rational mind as well and that part of me sometimes can overcome the hardwired automatic responses to situations and I can at least have this kinda detachment from the anxiety even though I suffer it. But I am thirty years old. Four months ago the anxiety caused what I can explain as a total destruction of self--and I had some of the most intense anxiety and depression I've ever had. I call these ground zero moments--in terms of psychology--they reduce me to nothing and there is just a fleshy body with thoughts that know something has gone horribly wrong. The first time I had this experience I was 22 and I saw a therapist. She told me I had depersonalization/derealization/GAD and depression and so on. But I 'recovered' through philosophy. The thing is, I know I have this chemical imbalance. And that it isn't my fault. But the other thing is that this chemical imbalance has caused catastrophic damage to the structures of self--they bring on the existential dilemmas faced--like meaninglessness, selflessness, hopelessness, and I keep struggling but for what? And worst of all, I am perpetually confused by existence. The second I find myself being 'in the moment' and free like an animal there is a part of my brain that detaches and says 'what the hell is going on--who are you and why are all these people around you and why did you even say the things that you said and how do you use your mouth and dont you know you are just a fleshy body and this thing called consciousness is super frigging crazy and holy cow what is even happening' and then I get overwhelmed on an existential level and either need to leave the room and have a beer or go for a run. Anyways my subconscious structures have just collapsed and now I am an over analytical brain that is overly self aware of itself and its hard to come back to naivety I suppose. My former self seems like a distant memory and I've been like this for 4 months and can't even remember what its like to be happy. Anyways--I don't want to do meds either. But I was just wondering--how many other users here find the existential side of the illness unbearable??? What do you do to try turn it off?

Kristy3 My family think they are helping me by telling me that depression is the state of mind but they have no idea
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Hi I was diagnosed back in 2013 severe chronic depression along with severe anxiety and stress. I recently applied DSP because i realise i cant work and last year i had to quit my job due to my depression and anxiety. My depression has caused me to c... View more

Hi I was diagnosed back in 2013 severe chronic depression along with severe anxiety and stress. I recently applied DSP because i realise i cant work and last year i had to quit my job due to my depression and anxiety. My depression has caused me to comfort eat and i have put on so much weight. I very rarely leave the house except for going to appointments and doing food shopping. My depression started in my early teens and it got worse after my mother passed away from cancer. My depression was caused by my family who always criticised everything i did nothing was ever good enough. From the age of 13 my stepfather became physically abusive not to the point of being black and blue but every time i stood up for myself after him treating me like rubbish he would hit me because i back answered him and he considers that as disrespect. My stepfather didn't treat me like a daughter and no one believed that he was treating me this way even now i would get called a liar because in everyone else's mind they all thought he was a great father who had accepted a woman who had a daughter. However it wasn't just my stepfather who treated me badly it was also my mother who told me i was an embarrassment to her because i didnt wear my hair down i had it up into a pony tail because i just gotten over gastro and i still had a bit of a temperature and i wanted my hair to be off my shoulders. Because of what i went through over the years i just kept on falling and falling and lost my self-esteem my worth always believing that i was dumb and stupid and had no intelligence. My depression is based on the hurt that i have suffered over time and there is always triggers that that causes me to relapse over and over and i all i want to do is stay in side my unit because thats where i feel the most safest. My family think they are helping me by telling me that depression is the state of mind but they have no idea. I get no support or help from my family they try to control everything i do and it makes me worse and it increases my anxiety and all i want to do is run away from them because i feel like i cant breath around them. I stumbled on to this site because it would nice to read stories from people who truly understand what you are going through.

hey001 Lost
  • replies: 6

Hi, So this is my first post, im 23 and lost in life. I feel like i'm caught in a whirlpool of my own thoughts, sometimes i think bad stuff, but most of the time its me trying to think of what i need to do in life. At the moment i'm trying to find my... View more

Hi, So this is my first post, im 23 and lost in life. I feel like i'm caught in a whirlpool of my own thoughts, sometimes i think bad stuff, but most of the time its me trying to think of what i need to do in life. At the moment i'm trying to find my passion ( im aware its not an easy thing), but all my dreams are so farfetched, like i want to make a big discovery or something i don't know what! after getting excited about the thought of making such a big achievement i fall into a hole in my mind, and its almost like if i can't have or start working towards this goal, life isn't worth living, it's not good enough, i know i sound like a spoilt brat but that's how i feel. I procrastinate alot... and when ever i do start working towards something, it's only a matter of time before i get sick of it (usually a couple of days). My expectations of life are huge, like i must do something great or i am worthless and shouldnt continue living. I tried doing simple things like art/sewing/calligraphy, it relaxed me, but the interest lasted only a couple of days, and its like i have a number of hobbys that i circulate over an over. Doesn't sound like such a bad thing but it is for me, because im looking for something i can put my full energy into, not just temporary. I'm sure most 23 year olds reach this point in life. The other thing i'll mention is my fear of time wasting... yet i get nothing done. My biggest regret is laying on my deathbed and thinking "I wish i got there". I have a girlfriend of 5 years, though i can't commit to a relationship because im so far deep in my own head, but i can't abandon my relationship because it supports me. Its sad but true. My biggest fear is getting to a certain age maybe 30 or 40 i dont know, and if i haven't made some progress towards my passion i feel it's necessary to no longer live beyond that point. To make things clearer my big farfetched dream is travelling space or something along those lines. Thankyou for taking the time to read.