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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Shyer000 Depression and Suicide Thoughts
  • replies: 3

Hi I am Shyer000 and I’m concerned that I may have depression but I’m not sure? I am only young but old enough to understand this as I am a teenager. I have taken online tests and they all resulted in high but I don’t want to see a doctor and I’m not... View more

Hi I am Shyer000 and I’m concerned that I may have depression but I’m not sure? I am only young but old enough to understand this as I am a teenager. I have taken online tests and they all resulted in high but I don’t want to see a doctor and I’m not sure how to tell my Mum that I think this is happening. A couple weeks ago I felt really alone in this world and I shouted at my brother and sister (who were laughing at me) whatever you think it’s funny that I want to kill myself! My sister told my mum the other night and she was upset because I close friend of hers had just attempted to commit suicide which didn’t help the fact that I felt so alone and unwanted. I’m not sure I want to ring anyone yet but I’m up for texting. Can anyone give me any advice on what to do?

CourtneyJ Monday mornings
  • replies: 1

Hi all 32 GAD and depression suffererer here. I just need to share my feelings right now. Every Monday morning when I wake up I have a moment of pure honesty. Where all my normal walls are stripped away, I have nothing to hide behind and feel ALL my ... View more

Hi all 32 GAD and depression suffererer here. I just need to share my feelings right now. Every Monday morning when I wake up I have a moment of pure honesty. Where all my normal walls are stripped away, I have nothing to hide behind and feel ALL my pain. All the hopelessness. Feelings of being a failure, pathetic, a loser, ugly, not good enough. Now I think it's important to "sit" with these feelings and actually "feel" them in order to learn. But of course it only takes a few minutes before life takes over and the feelings get buried again. In this case I feel like my coping mechanisms that I've developed over many years to live a normal and productive life are working against me. In writing this I'm not looking for resources/advice to help to resolve these negative feelings (I know how to do that). I guess I'm hoping that I'm not alone in experiencing this?

mackayandchill Feeling hopeless
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, first time ever posting on this forum. This feels weird to do because I don't like sharing my problems with other people, but at least it's anonymous. Basically, I've been feeling hopeless. All I want to do is get out of the present, and... View more

Hi everyone, first time ever posting on this forum. This feels weird to do because I don't like sharing my problems with other people, but at least it's anonymous. Basically, I've been feeling hopeless. All I want to do is get out of the present, and into the future, but I don't know what I'm going to do once I get out of high school. The last thing I want to do is work behind a desk all day, because I could never see myself fitting in there. Problem is, I don't know if I have enough money or talent for what I really want to do. So the future looks bleak, and the present is just as bad. I have little to no social life (despite my best efforts), no commitments to anyone or anything outside of family, and grades are pretty average. It's a horrible feeling to know that you are destined to fail, and that it won't get any better when you leave school. Thanks for reading

Brof Why is my BPD affecting me being able to hold a job
  • replies: 4

Hi so I recently got a job I quite enjoyed for about a month and then the second month felt like everything was an effort, I started getting anxiety attacks with the thought about working. These attacks would happen 2 days before I had to work. Yeste... View more

Hi so I recently got a job I quite enjoyed for about a month and then the second month felt like everything was an effort, I started getting anxiety attacks with the thought about working. These attacks would happen 2 days before I had to work. Yesterday I pulled up my drive way and broke down 1 hour before I had to work my mum saw me and called my boss saying I couldn’t come in anymore. Since then I have been extremely depressed and felt hopeless I’ve never been able to hold down a friend or a job without fearing I would lose it or just wanting to give up so it would make my life easier. Can someone tell me if this is normal and what I should do, perhaps share similar experiences or guide me?

Gsrri depression
  • replies: 2

hi.I am experiencing no feelings in my heart.I cant feel love or happiness.i can only feel despair and cry.this has been goinv o for few months now.has anybody else had this problem.cause i dont know what to do .

hi.I am experiencing no feelings in my heart.I cant feel love or happiness.i can only feel despair and cry.this has been goinv o for few months now.has anybody else had this problem.cause i dont know what to do .

Naraa I Feel so Alone
  • replies: 5

For some backstory, I have had diagnosed depression since I was 15, so 4 years now. I am used to the constant up and downs with my mood, and thought for the past year that I had decent control over my depression and was mostly fine. I thought that my... View more

For some backstory, I have had diagnosed depression since I was 15, so 4 years now. I am used to the constant up and downs with my mood, and thought for the past year that I had decent control over my depression and was mostly fine. I thought that my anxiety was all I had to worry about, so I didn’t even think of the depression. Recently however, I am finding myself in one of the worst depressive episodes I’ve had for a long time. I need help, but I’m still dependent on my mother, and I asked her to stop my psychology appointments so that she could afford help for her own issues. I can’t afford them for myself. We do get help paying for 10 sessions under the mental health plan, but we still have to pay a decent amount, and the mental health plan no where near covers how many sessions my psych recommended for me. I am scared where my thoughts are taking me. I’m not sleeping well, which I know isn’t helping, but I don’t have the motivation to fix it. I was getting jealously issues over my best friend hanging out with other friends, and I know it was toxic and unfair of me, so I have pushed all my friends away. I feel like I am a burden, and that I should slowly push away from them so it’s less painful for them. This is the hardest thing for me, because I feel so alone....but watching them talk and laugh together, hang out... it made me feel even more alone. My best friend is amazing, she has tried to help me so much and I know she loves me, so I don’t know why I let this jealously affect me so much. I just need someone to talk to. I don’t know where to go. I wish I had my psychologist but I don’t.

FoolsGold Anhedonia: the worst manifestation of treatment-resistant depression?
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone, This is my first time posting and I'm not sure what to expect. I guess I should tell you a bit about me before I pose some questions that I would really appreciate feedback on. I'm 48 (male) and battle treatment-resistant depression, gen... View more

Hi everyone, This is my first time posting and I'm not sure what to expect. I guess I should tell you a bit about me before I pose some questions that I would really appreciate feedback on. I'm 48 (male) and battle treatment-resistant depression, generalised anxiety disorder and an alcohol use problem; all since I was in my early teens. It's been a very tough road navigating treatments (anti-depressants, anxiolytics, stimulants, anti-psychotics, mood stabilisers, ECT, TMS, CBT, interpersonal therapy, medications to address my alcohol use, etc.) and the devastating effects my condition has had on relationships. My anxiety is well-controlled with a non-benzodiazepine medication at the moment, but I expect to develop tolerance to it as has been my experience in the past. I eventually found a SNRI anti-depressant 11 years ago that prevents me from living in a crippling abyss of depression, but I'm left with persistent anhedonia that I now recognise has been the long-standing reason for my inability to define a direction for my life. With some unfortunate exceptions, I'm grateful for my privileged access to excellent medical professionals in Australia and in the US. I'm looking forward to consulting a psychiatrist who specialises in the treatment of mood disorders, anhedonia in particular, and would really like to hear about others' experience with anhedonia. Anhedonia is the (relative) inability to experience pleasure. Although not always present, is it the worst possible symptom of treatment-resistant depression? I think that it is. How can anhedonia be successfully treated? I was prescribed a selective dopamine receptor agonist, a good idea and supported for the treatment of anhedonia by a small number of clinical studies, but the risk of unpredictable "sleep-attacks" makes driving too dangerous and so I won't take it. How do you cope with anhedonia? In the long-term, it's paralysing for me and makes me periodically suicidal. Life without pleasure is very difficult to sustain. Is there any hope?

maggie23 First Time Mum - PND
  • replies: 2

Hi, I became a mum for the first time last year to a beautiful little boy who I love to pieces, but I can't help but be envious of my old life. There is so much I miss about my life before DS (darling son), and I can't help but feel resentful towards... View more

Hi, I became a mum for the first time last year to a beautiful little boy who I love to pieces, but I can't help but be envious of my old life. There is so much I miss about my life before DS (darling son), and I can't help but feel resentful towards him sometimes. I have suffered from depression and anxiety for over 10 years now, I manage with medication, but some days are just BAD. DS has been going through a really clingy/separation anxiety phase (even if you're right next to him, he wants to be held). Hubby works during the week so it's only me and DS throughout the day. The last couple of weeks has just been winging and winging mixed with teething (I hope), and last night it got the better of me and I snapped. I knew it was coming so I put DS in his cot where he would be safe, then I lost it. I through things, I shouted at my husband (who sadly is used to me having meltdowns) and I wanted to hit things. I try really hard not to hit things, so I push against a wall or door frame to expel the pent up energy. Hubby went to took care of DS which was great, but it also left me alone. I've always had Hubby to help hold me, or hold my hands and be there. This time I didn't. This led to resentment again towards DS for taking Hubby from me when I needed him. These thoughts then led to self-loathing and self-hate. I went for a drive. I cried for a good hour. I am going back to work next week for three days and I am so excited. Does this make me a bad mother for wanting to leave my child? I just don't think I am a good SAH (stay at home) mum. I'm hoping with me being back at work and having these breaks more often will make me a happier mum for DS. Thanks for listening. Just needed somewhere to vent. M

Bulus Shabbaz I never even met them (when mourning is invalidated)
  • replies: 1

I was doing really well after coming down from about of mania...and then on the 10th, the music world was informed of the sad news that the legendary drummer Neil Peart from Canadian trio RUSH had died of brain cancer. This is not a post to promote R... View more

I was doing really well after coming down from about of mania...and then on the 10th, the music world was informed of the sad news that the legendary drummer Neil Peart from Canadian trio RUSH had died of brain cancer. This is not a post to promote RUSH so all I am going to say is this band had a very intense fanbase who were personally invested in their music and the lyrics to their songs, which Neil Peart for the majority, was responsible for writing. Suffice it to say, as a fan I was devastated and have been for the last few days. I am sure we've all had similar experiences when a musician or entertainer who's art means a great deal to you dies, and the feeling of loss and heartbreak can be for some, just as intense as it would be had a close friend or relative passed. And while the vast majority of people I know have never heard of RUSH could see I was visibly saddened, and have approached me with compassion, to some people, the idea of me mourning over a person who I do not know personally and have never met, puzzles them. These people seem to be insulted that I'd be so upset over the death of an entertainer. And as such, I've relegated to trying to hide my pain, or just telling people who ask me what is wrong, that a friend of mine has died, as not to run the risk of my emotions being invalidated.

SquireHarbour I feel trapped
  • replies: 2

I dunno how to explain this. I feel trapped by my depression, like it is some sort of cell clouding around my head, trying to feed me with everything bad in the world, my favourite band being bad, mad men controlling the superpowers, my parents fight... View more

I dunno how to explain this. I feel trapped by my depression, like it is some sort of cell clouding around my head, trying to feed me with everything bad in the world, my favourite band being bad, mad men controlling the superpowers, my parents fighting with each other every day... I feel sad. I feel angry, I feel like I want to cry and want to rage at the same time, but I feel exhausted every day. It feels like the same cycle and nothing that I think about will ever come true. I want to go places, see everywhere that I want to, be with my friends and then settle down and do a job that will help other people who are just like me, but currently I feel like nothing is going to get better. I'm on anti depressants, I have to take sleep medication because my thoughts keep running through my head, I have to see my therapist, psych and chologist every month, but it seems this ghost never goes away... What can I do? Am I going mad?