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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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charred Lost and empty
  • replies: 8

Hi people. I'll try nutshell this as much as possible. 39 yr old male. Life has just become overwhelming, yet empty. At a young age, my parents divorced, and my mum moved us far away from our dad. He was a great dad, and did nothing wrong, but due to... View more

Hi people. I'll try nutshell this as much as possible. 39 yr old male. Life has just become overwhelming, yet empty. At a young age, my parents divorced, and my mum moved us far away from our dad. He was a great dad, and did nothing wrong, but due to this, hasnt been there since I was 12. My mother ending up moving again, I refused, and have been navigating life alone since I was 15. I got into a toxic relationship, and having no support, I stayed, and also got married. After almost 15 years, it finally came to an end, but not before we had our son. Not seeing him everyday broke my heart. I had him every weekend, and I cherished him. He was a mini me, he was all I had. My ex then met someone 1000kms away and decided she wanted to take our son and move. I could have taken her to court and stopped her, but I didnt. I didnt want to drag my little boy through court. She lived with her family, and it was toxic. Even if I won, it meant i kept her trapped here, in a toxic situation, away from her new partner. I just wanted my son to be happy, and that means his mother needs to be stable and happy too. I reluctantly let her go, knowing she would be happy, he would be okay, and the only one who would suffer would be me. And suffer I do. This happened almost 2 years ago, when my boy was 4. I ring every week. I send him gifts. I pay my child support and give extra for things like sport etc, even though i'm not very well off at all. I only get to see him 4 times a year now. I make the 2000km return trip, to spend school holidays with him. But it just breaks my heart. Last time we said goodbye, I could barely drive home, and cried for hundreds of kms. I just feel like I failed, even though its not my fault. Im not a dad to him, even though I wanted to be. I'm not sucsessful, or rich, or even have a career. I rent an old farm house. I have old cars. I know that stuff isnt meant to be important, but everyone around is doing so much better. I cant even do the free thing of showing my boy I love him, supporting him, teaching him. It was stripped from me, and its scarred me. I cant get over it. That i wont be important to him later in life. That he will feel like I wasnt there for him. That i wasnt there to help, teach and support him. That I miss out on all his milestones. It just breaks me over and over again, and I cant stop thinking about it. Ive had depression for the last 10 years, and am on antidepressants. But lately, I just feel empty, hurt, and my soul is tired.

Maui757 It’s been a while...
  • replies: 1

Hi all, So it’s been a while since I posted. About a year actually. I was doing really well for a while there, but I was continually struggling with working away from home (DIDO and then FIFO) and just found my job wasn’t fulfilling me enough and I c... View more

Hi all, So it’s been a while since I posted. About a year actually. I was doing really well for a while there, but I was continually struggling with working away from home (DIDO and then FIFO) and just found my job wasn’t fulfilling me enough and I couldn’t stand being away from my boyfriend, friends and family all the time. so I made a massive decision to pursue my dream of becoming a high school teacher. So at Christmas I packed in the FIFO gig and threw out my hi-vis, and come the 4th of January I started my Masters in Secondary Education. I’m now into my second term, week 5, and I’m struggling. Now I KNEW I would struggle, because I don’t do uncertainty, and I don’t do uni very well. It’s a recipe for disaster with me. But wow, I did not expect it to be this hard! I thought I struggled through my engineering degree... Well this Masters is so much harder! There’s just no break, it’s full on and I’m struggling to maintain the workload whilst working part time. But even if I wasn’t working at all, I would still struggle with the workload. I just can’t seem to keep my mind focused on my study. I’m always stressing about work, life, my boyfriend (he’s struggling with depression and anxiety now too), and whatever else my mind can bring up. I’m worried I’m not going to like being a teacher, and I haven’t got another plan so if this fails, it’s back to mining, which I left for a reason! So I’m feeling pressured to have this work out but it’s just freaking me out! I’ve been seeing my psych regularly, I’m trying to get additional help with my studies wherever possible but it’s tricky as I’m a fully online student so there’s no face to face classes. I guess what I’m saying is, I’m freaking out big time. What if this doesn’t work out? What am I supposed to do then? Why is this so hard for me? Why can’t I be like everyone else seems to be and just get through study like a normal person? Why is my brain so under developed emotionally? Why do I find this so difficult? Will it ever end? Will there always be something wrong with me? The questions never end, it’s just this steady stream of ‘what if’s and ‘why’s. I’m feeling so deflated, a shell of the person I was. I have no confidence in myself, I feel lost and alone, and trapped. I feel like I can’t turn to my usual network of friends and family for help because I use them too much. I don’t know how to go through this Maui

hb1994 How to help mother dealing with cardiac blues
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Recently my mum went in for a stent after about a year of tests regarding a weird turn last January 2020. She has always been a happy, free spirit and has never suffered with any kind of depression or anxiety other than after a miscarria... View more

Hi everyone, Recently my mum went in for a stent after about a year of tests regarding a weird turn last January 2020. She has always been a happy, free spirit and has never suffered with any kind of depression or anxiety other than after a miscarriage. She came out of the surgery and is now dealing with what I would consider quite a bad episode of depression and anxiety. I just wanted to know if anyone had any tips on how to help her through this period? She's been put on anti-depressants but it obviously hasn't started working yet and if anything is a bit worse. Any advice is much appreciated

mocha delight Mood journal
  • replies: 3

Hi all I was wondering if those of you that do/keep a mood journal can give me any tips or advice ect ect ect on how to do one as I don’t know how to go about how to do one but my psychologist wants me to start doing one. She wants me to do one to wo... View more

Hi all I was wondering if those of you that do/keep a mood journal can give me any tips or advice ect ect ect on how to do one as I don’t know how to go about how to do one but my psychologist wants me to start doing one. She wants me to do one to work out what my triggers are well other then family members that is as other then that I don’t know what are my triggers and if I do a mood journal we might be able to pick up a pattern.

Pete66 Can it be this easy?
  • replies: 6

So, after spending 2020 in a dark hole, and the beginning of 2021 slightly brighter, I decided to finally see a doctor She made me fill out a questionnaire, after which she prescribed me a low dosage of an antidepressant Now I am not saying I am cure... View more

So, after spending 2020 in a dark hole, and the beginning of 2021 slightly brighter, I decided to finally see a doctor She made me fill out a questionnaire, after which she prescribed me a low dosage of an antidepressant Now I am not saying I am cured, or that I am dancing with butterfly's, but darn, it feels like a lot of cotton wool has been removed from my head, and i can think so much more clearly Can recovery really be this easy?

MignightBlue My loved ones will never recover
  • replies: 10

Hi everyone, I’ve had some mental health issues for a while. In high school I used to self harm and was close to suicide. I’m 42 and still want to die. Things are really bad this year and I am so close with going through with it but my partner and mo... View more

Hi everyone, I’ve had some mental health issues for a while. In high school I used to self harm and was close to suicide. I’m 42 and still want to die. Things are really bad this year and I am so close with going through with it but my partner and mother are the only things keeping me alive. I know my death would ruin their lives. They wouldn’t get over it. I feel though I’m sacrificing my “freedom” and putting them before me. Yesterday I was so close to doing it. Next week I find out if I still have a job but at this stage, I really don’t care. I‘ve done the best with my life but it’s time to go. In a previous attempt my note said I love them and to get over it (only my partner knows about that attempt) but I feel like I want to tell them what I feel before I go as a courtesy and to say I love them. I can’t ask them for help either, it’ll hurt them so I just feel even worse. Yesterday I wanted someone to take me to some mental health unit so they will understand my problems and it won’t come as a shock. I don’t even know why I’m writing this, here on the couch crying and what this will accomplish. Once they die or If we become estranged I’ll definitely do it but life is such a struggle and I’m ready to hang up my boots. There will become a point however when I can no longer place their happiness above mine. It will be sad but I just wasn’t meant to live this life. FYI, I have tried therapy, medication, etc but nothing works. One day it will get so bad I’ll have to go ahead but to hurt them like that is so cruel. I am just lost, confused and unhappy. sorry, I think I just needed to write this down rather than ask for help as I’m beyond that. MC

Azaira No end in sight....
  • replies: 5

New here so just introduce myself and tell you a bit about myself, and will try not to bore you so will keep is as short as I can, though I’m pretty sure I could write enough for a book lol. I’ma married women, 62, gosh I hate saying that At the begi... View more

New here so just introduce myself and tell you a bit about myself, and will try not to bore you so will keep is as short as I can, though I’m pretty sure I could write enough for a book lol. I’ma married women, 62, gosh I hate saying that At the beginning of last year I was starting struggling with my health, tired and ached all the time, depressed and anxious, I put it down to my age and working in the Aged Care Industry, which I loved but it was very difficult as I get to attachéd. Somehow I managed to get through to November and I had to resign , I was a mess, I would drive to work praying I could get through the shift. My GP diagnosed me with Fibromyalgia, so that helped by giving me some answers. Thought I would feel better, but the anxiety and depression has got worse, I spoke to a Physcologist twice, which did not help at all. So basically now, I don’t want to go out, I want to sleep and cry all the time because then I don’t have to think, I have no enthusiasm for anything, I don’t want to talk to people. I just don’t know how to get out of feeling like this. I don’t want to be here, but I couldn’t put my family through losing me so I feel trapped. If you managed to read all that (I did condense it), I thank you. I know there is no magic answer, I have tried meditation, exercise, talking to family, but it makes no difference, every day is a struggle, I just don’t see an end to it. cheers

Hopefullseeking Been a while
  • replies: 8

Hi, Not sure where to start. Have had depression most of my life, really struggling now. Feeling desperate and sick of feeling this way. Have both a psychiatrist (every three months) and psychologist (monthly) missed my last appointment due to being ... View more

Hi, Not sure where to start. Have had depression most of my life, really struggling now. Feeling desperate and sick of feeling this way. Have both a psychiatrist (every three months) and psychologist (monthly) missed my last appointment due to being sick. These feelings seem never ending, I’m 66 and thought I would be “better” by now. Tired of living in my head.

romantic_thi3f My job provider wants me to look for more jobs and I' m not coping
  • replies: 33

Hi, Not entirely sure where to put this but hopefully someone can relate. I'm with a DES (Disability employment service) and have quite a few health issues and mental health issues. So when I got assessed by Centrelink they set me at 8 hours per week... View more

Hi, Not entirely sure where to put this but hopefully someone can relate. I'm with a DES (Disability employment service) and have quite a few health issues and mental health issues. So when I got assessed by Centrelink they set me at 8 hours per week, which seemed okay because I do want to work. But I've had a really rough time applying for jobs. I live in the city and our public transport is horrible, so without a drivers license something that's 15 minutes drive can take 2 hours to get there, and then a lot of the jobs that I like need a car anyway. Initially I wanted to do something in mental health like peer support or support work, but at this stage I'm open to anything. I've applied for receptionist jobs as well, but everything seems to be a very competitive industry. Overall, it's pretty defeating and it gets me down, but now they've bumped up my job hunt from 8 to 15, and it feels rather daunting. I've even relapsed into depression which is really hard. Is there anyone else in the same position? How do you cope with the job hunt when it all feels so overwhelming at times? rt

TheBigBlue Feelings of shame - where do they stem from?
  • replies: 5

Hi Team, I’ve been on a long journey in my battle with anxiety, depression & CPTSD. A few years on & find myself in a “better” mental position. I joined a local soccer team. It was a fantastic step as it meant I incorporated exercise into my routine,... View more

Hi Team, I’ve been on a long journey in my battle with anxiety, depression & CPTSD. A few years on & find myself in a “better” mental position. I joined a local soccer team. It was a fantastic step as it meant I incorporated exercise into my routine, I get out of the house for training & game day & I’ve met some people from my local community. Now we are an over 40’s team, so aren’t the fast, most athletic or skilfull team you might come across, but we can match it with the other teams in the comp. So I’m unfit, haven’t exercised in over 10 years & it seems I have lost my sense of balance. I fell over twice in the trial match, & again today I fell over twice. My legs just turn to jelly & down I go. I can’t even stand/balance on one foot anymore. so today I stacked it while trying to run, got up, tried to run & stacked it again. I felt fine, but my legs just weren’t working like they should. Immediately one of my team mates called for an interchange because they thought I was suffering hypoglycaemia (low blood glucose) with my type 1 diabetes. They did the right thing, they did the safe thing. But I knew it wasn’t low blood sugar. I wear a continuous glucose monitor which is stuck in my arm, & it communicates with my insulin pump. I just need to look at my pump screen & it tells me my numbers & gives me a graph so I can see how my levels are trending. So I go off, people are offering me juice/candy etc but I did a blood test to double check & all was fine. But the amount of shame I now feel is immense. The embarrassment of being uncoordinated, maybe having some weird balance issue I was unaware of, my diabetes, looking like a fool. I’ve been angry at myself all day. I don’t want to show my face to those teammates again cause I feel like I’m the one they have to treat “special”. I grew up being ashamed of my type 1 diabetes diagnosis as people don’t understand the difference between type 1 & type 2, & just assume I ate the wrong things growing up. FYI type 1 is an autoimmune condition where your immune system destroys the beta cells in your pancreas. The beta cells are hat produces insulin. Once they are destroyed you can’t “fix” them or grow more. You rely on injected insulin for the rest of your life. So now I have all this childhood shame back where I worry that people think “I don’t take proper care of myself” combined with the humiliation of falling over & im back to hating myself again. Why is it being uncoordinated brought all that shame back?