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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Cymbeline Stuck in an endless cycle and afraid I'll never learn how to drive
  • replies: 1

I have been trying to learn how to drive for years, but I'm too anxious to learn. For years I have been in a cycle of doing lessons with an instructor or relative for a few months, and eventually having a panic attack behind the wheel. I stop for a l... View more

I have been trying to learn how to drive for years, but I'm too anxious to learn. For years I have been in a cycle of doing lessons with an instructor or relative for a few months, and eventually having a panic attack behind the wheel. I stop for a long time, and then try again with a new instructor, only for the same thing to happen. I have tried many different strategies and I feel like my psychologist has done everything she can to help me. I have contacted all the mental health services in my area and am certain there is no local driving course or instructor that specialises in anxiety. I want to stop trying to learn to drive, but it's necessary for the career I want and the area I currently live in. Everyone in my life keeps telling me that if I persist, I'll get there, but my most recent instructor told me that I'm nowhere near ready to go for the test, even after all the time, money and effort I've put into it.

Huggybear TIRED OF FEELING WORTHLESS
  • replies: 6

I have suffered with anxiety and depression for many years. My partner and I were together for 22yrs, then seperated as he wanted to leave. i was on my own for 10yrs, then I lost my job, couldn't find anything quick enough, had to sell my home i was ... View more

I have suffered with anxiety and depression for many years. My partner and I were together for 22yrs, then seperated as he wanted to leave. i was on my own for 10yrs, then I lost my job, couldn't find anything quick enough, had to sell my home i was in for 35yrs, then struggled to find a rental property before i had to hand over the house to buyer. I had spoken to my ex and told him to collect some things that were his, as i was selling. He offered me a room to rent in his home until i find something, which i was very grateful for.I had been here 2 weeks, when he proposed to me. I refused, and was not in my right mind after what i had just gone through. He said he had changed, and I actually believed him. He has bipolar, he has been using coercive control since i got here, and last year i had to have emergency surgery for a cerebral aneurysm and subarachnoid hemorrhage. i was given a 40% chance of coming through, and I didn't care if i didn't. I was so over dealing with the ex. The 2 weeks ago, he just out of the blue said" i made a mistake, I want you to leave" to this day I have had no explaination as to why, what did i do" nothing!so now i am frantically packing my things, and trying so hard to find a rental to get out of here, I keep out of his sight, so I don't get verbally attacked, as he can be very cruel with his words. I was told by the nuero surgeon did i suffer with anxiety/depression i said yes, he said that was probably the cause!I had to fend for myself when I came home, still had to do my housework and cook, nothing changed.it was hard to walk, and speak, and eat at that time, but I got through it and have done well! But I have no life, I go nowhere, he does his own thing. I have supported myself with my savings from day 1, and he has needed money although he works, and I buy the food each week. How can some people just go on like nothing has happened, and have no feelings as to what they have done. I feel used, worthless, no confidence, alone, walking on egg shells, don't feel safe and secure. All I have ever wanted is peace and happyness, yet is so hard to achieve. You feel so alone, you wonder what you have done. im 60yrs old and now I have to rebuild again. Will I ever find that peace, I so believe I deserve?

Bouncing_Rabbit Girlfriend Isolating Herself Due to Living Conditions
  • replies: 2

I have been with my lovely girlfriend for just recently a year, she is seriously the best thing to ever happen to me and I love her more then the world itself. 80% of the time she happy and we call and text often and the other 20% she isolates hersel... View more

I have been with my lovely girlfriend for just recently a year, she is seriously the best thing to ever happen to me and I love her more then the world itself. 80% of the time she happy and we call and text often and the other 20% she isolates herself and pushes me away. I have tried to find anything online about people only spacing sometimes but I can't seem to. She is living at home with her terrible father and step mother who treat her horribly, always throughout our relationship she has dealt with problems with them and we would usually talk about them and focus on the next thing. We also do both have school at the moment and exams and she is stressing a lot about that at the moment, and I have helped here with a few of them to keep her back on track. However in the past 3 months she has been very on and off, we have had our one year and other times together and she has been ecstatic and really happy whenever we hang out but when we are at home and calling she operates very differently. She will push herself away and tell me to give her space and not want to talk to me or discuss her problems even when I suggest ways to take the load off of her. When she is not pushing away she is an incredible kind and caring girl and I'm so proud of her but when I discuss these issues she will either dismiss them and say she doesn't want to talk about them or we will make a plan but it will never work. I care about her a lot and want to make her happy however she never gives me the option to and I just want to help her. Her and I really do mean a lot to each other but sometimes it is hard to believe that when your constantly getting pushed away. I'm just really scared for her and need a solution she hasn't been diagnosed with anything or checked up recently. I just want to be able to make her happy all the time and stop these breaks and constant push aways. Thanks for reading

redpanda13 Never ending cycles of anxiety :(
  • replies: 5

I've always had an anxious / overthinking mind. Certain scenarios are always stuck in the back of my mind until I finally decide to do something about them then a new scenario just takes over and I'm stuck being anxious again for months / years.An ex... View more

I've always had an anxious / overthinking mind. Certain scenarios are always stuck in the back of my mind until I finally decide to do something about them then a new scenario just takes over and I'm stuck being anxious again for months / years.An example is one day I would suddenly feel bad about bullying this kid in the past then I would keep obsessing over that until one day I decided to apologize to him and his response was that he was fine and he didn't care about it. Then after some time, I will start to think that I have treated my ex girlfriend quite badly and start to obsess over that thought for a few months until I finally decide to message her and say "I'm sorry for treating you bad" in which she replies with " It's fine, no need to apologize".For the last few months I've been anxious about this other scenario. This is that one time my dad asked me to help him share a file and I saw an app with a big red heart on it. He has cheated on my mum in the past so seeing this just got me thinking if he is using a dating app? Afterwards I went to search up all the dating app images to see if that picture matched with any of them so I can be sure if he was using a dating app or not but was unable to find any matches. He hasn't shown any other signs of cheating and is always home etc. So I was just thinking if I am overthinking again. I feel like If i do confront this issue and ask him if he's using a dating app and "resolve" this issue, another scenario will just pop up and replace it and I'll be stressed over another thing and the cycle of never-ending anxiety will continue. There are more examples of these scenarios but I have just named 3 for this post. These scenarios always take me a long time like months to confront with the targeted person, because maybe the logical part of my brain is fighting with the anxious part of my brain and telling me that I'm just overthinking and nothing needs to be done, but in the end the anxious part always wins.I wish there was a way to target this core problem?Any tips or comments would be helpful Thank you so much!

majho88 OCD Staring
  • replies: 4

Hi people, any struggling with OCD staring, I was diagnosed with OCD 5 years ago, I'm pure, BUT OCD staring is my monster that have pushed me away for social life. The people believe that I'm a creepy person, but it's difficult to live with that, and... View more

Hi people, any struggling with OCD staring, I was diagnosed with OCD 5 years ago, I'm pure, BUT OCD staring is my monster that have pushed me away for social life. The people believe that I'm a creepy person, but it's difficult to live with that, and every day that passed I'm a bit further for everyone an isolated. Any support suggestions for OCD staring would be appreciate. Thanks a lot

Evie-mae How do you tell your parents
  • replies: 5

How do I tell me parents about how I’ve been feeling nervous and all the signs for anxiety/depression. I feel like I need help but I don’t really know how to seek it. I’ve tried telling friends and teachers but no one really listens. Also I’ve been f... View more

How do I tell me parents about how I’ve been feeling nervous and all the signs for anxiety/depression. I feel like I need help but I don’t really know how to seek it. I’ve tried telling friends and teachers but no one really listens. Also I’ve been feeling like there’s no point of living and that no one would really care if I was dead. I haven’t done anything thing to hurt myself. I just feel like that when I am overwhelmed and when I’ve had a bad day (which is often). I’ve started hating going to school pretty much to a point where my body feels sick when I’m about to go to school. I should tell my parents but I don’t know how. Anyone suggestions

Kayelle17 Withdrawal panic
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone. I am 35. I first developed panic attacks when I was 14. I think back then I was put on my 1st med. My panic attacks continued on and off for years. At some point I changed medication to my 2nd med. When I was 25 things got a lot better. ... View more

Hi everyone. I am 35. I first developed panic attacks when I was 14. I think back then I was put on my 1st med. My panic attacks continued on and off for years. At some point I changed medication to my 2nd med. When I was 25 things got a lot better. I got a new job, new relationship and for the first time in my life my panic attacks disappeared. I decided I no longer wanted to be on medication. About 6 months after being off my life spiralled back out of control and I went back on my 2nd med. A few years later I stared getting side effects I believed were from the medication. I switched over to my 3rd med. Since then everything has gone downhill. I developed neurological symptoms (weakened legs, difficulty walking, tingling, nerve pain) have had MRIs done which show small areas of abnormality (T2 Flair) but neurologists do not believe I have MS, but have diagnosed me with Functional Neurological Disorder. Following that diagnosis I was put on my 4th med and switched to from my 3rd med. 5 weeks after being on my 5th med I began feeling strange, spaced out, having episodes of depersonalisation and derealisation. I went back to doc and said I wanted off this med. Little did I know it is one of the worst to get off. I decided I wanted off all meds, having been on for so long I don’t know what’s causing symptoms anymore, me or the meds. We decided to start with the 5th med. I was only on the lowest dose, so my doc took me off cold turkey. I have my 6th medwhich she said to take if things get really bad. The first week off was difficult, physical symptoms, mostly brain zaps. But I am now into the second week and the mental side effects seem to be escalating. I am living in a constant state of fear. I have intrusive thoughts, which I’ve never had before. I am terrified of these thoughts. I feel out of it all the time. I wake up in a state of panic. My brain feels ‘wrong’ I am not sure how to describe it. I am irritable but it is mostly the fear that is taking over. I want to go sit in a corner somewhere, like that will be the only place I feel safe. Even though I have my 6st med, I barely take it as I am terrified I will get addicted to it and don’t want another problem. I go back to my doctor next week. My mind is torn between maybe having to go back on meds (not my 5th med or or my 2nd med) or trying to stick this out. But I am terrified that maybe this is just me now. Does anyone else have experience from withdrawing?

HisOwn ANTIDEPRESSANTS-HOW LONG BEFORE THEY KICK IN?
  • replies: 7

Hi all..Im just wondering if I can ask advice about antidepressants here please? I have just restarted on antidepressants after being off them for a long time so can't remember now from years ago how long it takes before kicking in.. I had to restart... View more

Hi all..Im just wondering if I can ask advice about antidepressants here please? I have just restarted on antidepressants after being off them for a long time so can't remember now from years ago how long it takes before kicking in.. I had to restart them because just was not even getting out of bed each day except to shower and eat so life wasn't happening. I was made aware that they can sometimes make you feel worse before getting better which has been the case but hoping it won't be too long before I start to feel a bit better. I am on day 6 at moment and had 1 reasonable day yesterday but back to feeling yukky today so not sure if that is just medication or not. Anyway looking for support advice while I try to get back on my feet as I live alone with a daughter who has a disability and have lost connection with many of my friends because of the depression and didn't want to burden them with these sorts of issues. Many thanks

BlueSky77 I am not sure if I can cope anymore
  • replies: 1

Hi, I am a mature aged student. My partner is mentally unwell. I live a very difficult life and wish not to be here throughout everyday. You might ask why I am still here, it's because I have two beautiful young girls, who really need me. I have been... View more

Hi, I am a mature aged student. My partner is mentally unwell. I live a very difficult life and wish not to be here throughout everyday. You might ask why I am still here, it's because I have two beautiful young girls, who really need me. I have been studying nursing. I have to do 25 weeks of full time placements to finish my degree. Doing placement full time will be the straw that broke the camels’ back. The University doesn’t allow me to do my placement part time. what should I do?