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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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lucie1989 Constant pins and needles /tingles
  • replies: 1

Hi just wondering if anyone else gets constant pins and needles /tingles? this has been ongoing for the last two weeks in my feet and hands and is stressing me out. I’m unsure if I’m anxious or is it something serious. my vision is blurred I’m not su... View more

Hi just wondering if anyone else gets constant pins and needles /tingles? this has been ongoing for the last two weeks in my feet and hands and is stressing me out. I’m unsure if I’m anxious or is it something serious. my vision is blurred I’m not sure if it’s lack of sleep or constant googling and too much screen time I’ve been to my gp and they have referred me for a mri ( which I can’t get into for 3 weeks) I feel disconnected and so scared it’s something serious . I’m a mum of young children. would love to hear if others had the same symptoms

car10001 having better work life balance
  • replies: 2

hi everyone most of you lot know about the current place of work being for sale and the plan not to stay once it has. just wondering how to have a better work life balance and have more time for your things and have time to take odd things to local m... View more

hi everyone most of you lot know about the current place of work being for sale and the plan not to stay once it has. just wondering how to have a better work life balance and have more time for your things and have time to take odd things to local markets to sell, what would be able to be done until the shops sold and have changed jobs with a job with better work life balance. at moment dont really have the time because of working alot and only days off are very valuable and dont want to do 7 days a week between the areas of work. one reason is the shop owners neice has started a candle side thing and shes apparently taking some to a local market and thats made me think about the side things and how much am wanting it to happen but am accepting that it wont happen overnight. because the shop is now only operating on bare essentials there is no one to cover and the remaning workers have taken on more and are working more and can understand why hospitality and certain retail is short staffed and so many gave notice after only being back a week from shutdown (why would that be). how would you be able to improve your work life balance with same pay until you can get into something more interesting and easier and better and same pay in half the time. sometimes its a little hard and feel it will take a long time and just hoping to have someone on here to talk to. as much as we at shop are going to miss each other and as disappointing as it is am accepting that it is time for us all to move on and because the shop is for sale and because am not going to stay long if at all have started taking action now because the shop could sell at any time plus itll probably take a long time and will need to do some training and that'll cost money and by taking action now then will be able to spread costs out. even though some if not all of things are not going to be extensive am likely still going to have to have some certificates depending on services and by taking action now then will be able to spread costs out. am not going to make 20 years in current job as much as am mostly enjoying it but am hoping to make at least 15 years because of having goals that am wanting to reach while able to and wanting to do things while am able to and not wanting to do hospitality anymore.

expressyourself95 Feeling defeated and lost.
  • replies: 3

Anxiety & Depression. I’ve failed my first course at university. I’m studying to become an Early childhood and Primary educator. I’m not doing well at all. This whole semester was full on. The workload was insane. And my inability to complete an assi... View more

Anxiety & Depression. I’ve failed my first course at university. I’m studying to become an Early childhood and Primary educator. I’m not doing well at all. This whole semester was full on. The workload was insane. And my inability to complete an assignment unless it’s the hour before it’s due is ridiculous and unsettling. I’m in my second degree and I still can’t get it right. What’s wrong with me? It’s my first proper year of living out of home - out of my parents home - and it’s been crazy managing adult life along with full time work and study as well as volunteer duties. I’m 27 and I haven’t filled my own cup in more than 12 months. I don’t know what to do. Fear of failure in my parents eyes cripples me and keeps me up at night. They are going to be incredibly disappointed and I’m going to hear about it too. It’s going to tip me over the edge.

Awhina24 Parent with eco-anxiety - help!
  • replies: 3

For the last few months I've been finding myself becoming increasingly anxious about climate change. I have suffered from anxiety and depression in the past which I'm sure just adds to my heightened emotions. It's at the point where I have nightmares... View more

For the last few months I've been finding myself becoming increasingly anxious about climate change. I have suffered from anxiety and depression in the past which I'm sure just adds to my heightened emotions. It's at the point where I have nightmares most nights, wake up shaky and feel incredibly anxious all day, sometimes to the point where I cannot eat. I have a 3 year old and keep asking myself why I was so foolish to bring a child into this world. My son wasn't planned but at the time I didn't want to have a termination. For context I'm a Kiwi and live in AU with my husband (also from NZ). We live in a smaller town outside of Melbourne. We haven't been directly affected by extreme weather but in my son's short life we've had bush fires, flooding and more flooding all nearby... as far as I'm aware things will only get worse from here. I'm so scared about what my family will have to face in the future, I feel like life is going to get very hard and very quickly (like in just a few years). I'm terrified that humanity is doomed and my son will have a future in some kind of kill or be killed world, that's if he has a future at all. I'm desperate to move back to NZ to be closer to my family but my husband doesn't want to. He doesn't see climate change as some imminent threat and is mainly focused on his job (pretty much the only reason we live here). I'm currently in therapy but I've only just started with a new therapist and we've mainly talked about my homesickness. I've started doing things like consuming less, trying to buy local and plastic free products, growing some vegetables and biking to the train station but I can't help thinking it's not enough and none of it matters. We can't vote in Australia so I can't do much politically. I'd love to get solar, a rainwater tank and an electric car but my husband seems hesitant to spend any money. Every news article makes it sound like it's too late and humanity is doomed to die out in anywhere from 5-100 years. I'm so scared and I'm struggling to function. I realize that climate anxiety is a privileged thing which makes me feel guilty for feeling this way (as in those directly effected don't get the luxury of worry about what may happen) Is there any hope? Do any other parents feel this way and how do you cope? How can I protect and prepare my son for life in a burning and flooding world?

Amelin_21 Weather Anxiety - How to remain calm and not panic
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone,It's been a while since I last posted. It's been good. I've had my anxiety under control and have changed jobs to reduce my stress to help. But the weather lately with strong winds has heightened my nerves and has brought the anxiety and ... View more

Hi everyone,It's been a while since I last posted. It's been good. I've had my anxiety under control and have changed jobs to reduce my stress to help. But the weather lately with strong winds has heightened my nerves and has brought the anxiety and panic feelings back. Last night it felt like I woke up feeling like I was about to have a panic attack and I can only attribute it to the strong winds and I worry about the house blowing apart. I have tried to remain calm when the wind is severe and tell myself it's ok but at the moment it feels like subconsciously my body is still reacting even though my mind is telling it something else. I was hoping to get some tips on how to manage these feelings and heavy chest during these windy, wild spring days. I can go for a drive to escape it at home but then overtime it's likely that will lead to having anxiety from being home (that happened with covid) and I can't have that happen again. Usually I would keep myself busy to help reduce the feelings but the whole house creeks and shakes in strong wind so it's not so easy to drown it out with sound or visually. Any tips would be great.

lanagomezz I don’t know whats wrong with me
  • replies: 1

I dont know how to express how i feel. I feel like i have so much wrong with me but as soon as i tell someone its like i was lying to myself. Ive seen a psychologist for around 8 months and honestly it hasnt helped and ive been lying to him. Around 4... View more

I dont know how to express how i feel. I feel like i have so much wrong with me but as soon as i tell someone its like i was lying to myself. Ive seen a psychologist for around 8 months and honestly it hasnt helped and ive been lying to him. Around 4 months ago i started feeling better about myself and actually enjoying life. But now i just feel nothing again. Out the blue. Like i feel nothing but theres like seperate part of me that is like “why are you acting like this” but i cant help it. I hate acting the way i do, i look miserable constantly and i just feel alone all the time. I have friends but im like their last option of a friend to all of them which doesnt help. I cant go to my parents because not even a trained professional seems to help me let alone my parents. I dont know if im just hormonal but it just doesnt feel hormonal. I dont know if its pms. Or im just tired. For a while i thought i had bpd but i dont. I think its just depression but at the same time im so motivated to do all my work and i love having fun with ppl. Everyone would describe me as quiet but when i was happy im the loudest person in the room. I feel like i lost that person a while ago though and if i go back it wouldnt be the same with everything thats happened. I could just be stereotyping depression but like whenever i talk about how i feel to my psychologist im like a different person who has no problems even when i wanna act like i do. I just constantly feel stupid for getting mood swings to the point i just push everyone away and i cant help it but i want to but its like something stops me from helping it. I just need one person to understand me bc i dont even know who i am anymore.

Nelle__09 I really need to quit my job due to my severe anxiety but people around me aren’t supportive of it
  • replies: 2

I am 20 and I’ve been struggling with anxiety for as long as I can remember and it seems to stem around being around people in social situations. For context, around a year ago I quit my job after I was struggling immensely with my mental health and ... View more

I am 20 and I’ve been struggling with anxiety for as long as I can remember and it seems to stem around being around people in social situations. For context, around a year ago I quit my job after I was struggling immensely with my mental health and anxiety after a suicide attempt. It took me roughly 8 months to find a job, which was back in the hospitality industry, and after a short while of working there my mental health started to take a dive again. This time I was aware and I could see the signs, so I took steps to ensure I wasn’t going to end up suicidal again. I found a new job and things seemed to be looking up but after recently starting this job I’ve been having severe panic attacks before/during and after work, throwing up at work and being sent home, making myself physically sick with nerves, not sleeping properly and I’m always constantly on the verge of tears because I’m always reminding myself of work. It’s physically and mentally exhausting and I really want to quit but if I do I have absolutely no income what so ever. I am still living at home but my family is not supportive of me quitting, last year when I quit I was in slump and it took at toll on my family too who had to financially support me through all of it. I’m now currently drowning in bills and I know I need to work to be able to pay them but my anxiety is so bad that I can’t even push myself to be at work and I feel like burden to everyone, I honestly don’t know what to do at this point…..

Nigel Alastair Aspergers.
  • replies: 2

HII am a man of senior years whohas suffered with aspergers syndrome for most of my life.It has had a big impact on my emotional and mental health with serious ongoing health issues.I am fortunate in other ways but still feel life has been a daily ch... View more

HII am a man of senior years whohas suffered with aspergers syndrome for most of my life.It has had a big impact on my emotional and mental health with serious ongoing health issues.I am fortunate in other ways but still feel life has been a daily challenge. People see me as someone positive and always in control that is far from the real me.

inferiore03 Whats wrong with me
  • replies: 1

I always used to be scared of growing up alone and terrified of rejection but for a while things were good I managed to have a few relationships and hook ups even be some what confident but since I ended my last relationship I have completely forgott... View more

I always used to be scared of growing up alone and terrified of rejection but for a while things were good I managed to have a few relationships and hook ups even be some what confident but since I ended my last relationship I have completely forgotten how to talk to anyone and ive gone so long with out any form of human contact that even though i crave it, it also makes me uncomfortable. I guess part of me wishes i never did hook up or have a relationship because now I know what im missing out on Ive come to the conclusion that I will be alone forever and not because im not good enough for someone but just because I'll never be able to put my self out there to meet anyone and even give it the chance of happening. I just feel like as a 22 year old I should be having the best time of my life not scared to even look at someone or leave my room.

mandie121332 I am always upset
  • replies: 3

I need to talk to someone about this thing that I am going through 

I need to talk to someone about this thing that I am going through