Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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I want to move schools but I can't, how do I cope with this?

replies: 7

Hello, I am a year 8 student and I wish to move schools, but due to my situation I am unable to.... I go to a strict Catholic unisex school and I hate it here.... I dread going to school and I get anxiety every time someone mentions school. I am fine with my friends and I don't get bullied, but the school has a lot of problems. The school is extremely homophobic, the teachers are not nice or helpful, the marking system is bad, the people aren't the nicest, and the rules and punishments are unreasonable. I feel very unhappy and unsafe here.. I feel like ever since I joined this school my mental health and overall wellbeing has declined and I want to transfer but I can't. I don't have the heart to tell my parents that I hate it here, and even if i tell them it will be difficult to move. First of all, my parents spent a lot of money to get me into this school (fees and uniform) and to move we would have to buy a new uniform ect. Secondly, I have a lot of good friends from that school and I really really don't to leave them behind, and they will probably get mad at me too. Also, my sister moved from the school and she goes to a new one, but it was really hard and I feel like if I try it will be hard for them. Even if I move I want to go to a STEM program in another school for year 11&12, and I feel like if i've already settled in the new school and my parents have already bought the uniform, it will be a waste because I'm moving in year 11&12. My only hope is to leave in year 11, either going to that STEM school I mentioned earlier (It's very selective so I might not get in.) Or the school my sister goes to now, because when I'm in year 11 she will be in Uni and I can just take her uniform so my parents don't have to buy a whole new uniform.... But its still 3 more years of this hell hole, and there is nothing I can do... how should I cope? Sorry for being negative in this post and thank you very much.. : )

I have so many things wrong with me

replies: 7

18 Male. I've gone through a lot of things in my teenage life and though I always knew that there were a lot of things wrong with me, I never realised the sheer amount until I decided to list it all down. You may not read all of it but I want to know if any of you go through any of this and I'd like to hear about your experiences. Self loathing Depression Anxiety No self confidence No people skills Awkward Lazy Game addiction Phone addiction Easily distracted Overthink things No real close friend Think too much about what others think of me No sense of independence Social anxiety No communication skills No street smarts Unmotivated Too easily driven by emotions Naive childish way of thinking things Think TOO positively and naively. I try to avoid facing reality which leads me to face the consequences Boring Uninteresting Can’t make small talk Keep things to myself Always try to look for an easy way out Take too long to process what people are saying Not book smart Too quiet Think too much about the future No real passion Nothing drives me to pursue my goal Useless at most tasks See no purpose in life Can’t keep up with conversations always follow the crowd. Never try to lead it Try hard to blend in with crowd Not many people have similar interests with me Never have anything interesting to say in a conversation Unfit (I sometimes go out to ride my bike, walk the treadmill and some other exercises but never on a regular basis. I do these things because it makes me feel like I'm not a useless human being who lazes around all day but it's only a temporary solution.) Almost never go out Always live the same day everyday

I used to laugh, now my personality has changed

replies: 2

Hi I'm Chantelle, I'm writing this in hopes that I'll get an answer from somebody as I've been looking for help lately and have been wondering. I feel as though I have lost my personality and motivation for life and work. Back in 2017, when I was 13, I used to have an online group of friends who I used to play video games with. I used to be very talkative, bubbly and always laughed. However fast forward to now, (16 years old) my personality has completely changed. I find it extremely difficult to make conversations and open up with co workers at work. I feel as though people don't like talking to me and find me as a nuisance. I'm also very introverted so try my best to avoid conversations in the first place. In addition to this,I used to be excited for work, now I'm unhappy and dread walking through the doors. When I reunited with my friends online after two years of almost no contact they told me they miss hearing me laugh. I have also noticed that I have become way less talkative and my tone of voice is very monotone and low. I find it very difficult opening/talking to people of authority (people who are older than me). I have no idea why but I think its because of my past experiences with a paedophile which has resulted me in subconsciously becoming afraid of conversing with adults. I need help, I feel as though I'm lonely and I'm only 16. I value friendships very deeply and I envy those who can make friends easily.

Failure

replies: 4

Hello everyone,i am a nursing student,i just got my result where i failed a unit.I just needed 6 marks to pass.I m feeling so miserable.I can’t stop crying.I dont have anyone to talk to.

Am I normal?

replies: 8

I'm twelve and I feel alone. I have recently noticed that I may have anxiety. This is because I looked at a lot of websites and videos I have all the symptoms of anxiety. I think this started in yr 5 when I started to sit with the "cooler" kids. At first, I thought it was fine, but soon, I got uncomfortable. It's not that don't like them, I like them very much, I just feel like I don't fit right in. I used to have a friend who was my best friend and I felt so comfortable with her, but we got distant and recently, she left to another city. Now I feel like I don't fit in at school anymore. I still hang out with my friends but I don't like the things they like and I think they just put up with me because we used to have fun together. As well as this, I have chest pain, dizziness, trembling, and sudden panic attacks. I want to tell someone but I'm scared to. My parents don't understand me. I come from a Chinese background, but I was born and raised here in Australia and I have always spoken English and hung out with western girls. So whenever I talk about something that they are not familiar to, they freak out and misunderstand me. We always get into fights and it's really scary. My sister has also never been close to me. I really want to be her friend and play with her like everyone else, but she is so rude to me. I feel like I don't belong at home or at school and always have to pretend to be okay. As well as this, I have a really tight schedule. I do coaching because my parents want me to go to a good uni. I also want to go too but it's so much work. I do coaching all weekend. Although I think coaching is stressful, I don't think I could not do it because I'm so used to the stress now. Everything I do is competitive. I do competitive swimming and compete in regionals, competitive, AFL, running, fencing, hockey and other things like robotics. I don't want to let go of these things but I'm really overwhelmed. I feel like I can't concentrate. Now in online school, I can't focus and I always tell lies to avoid uncomfortable situations. I have only told one person about this, she is my friend, and she went through a similar thing last year. No-one else knows and I don't want to tell my parents, I just want some support. I'm really terrified to be on this website because I'm afraid people will find out who I am or something. I have never done anything like this before. I hope you can help me because I don't know how to help myself.

I feel like I’ve wasted my youth

replies: 2

Hi I’m 19 years old, in 4th year of university and for the nth time, I’m feeling sorry for myself and how my life has gone by so far. I know I’m still young and my youth is not over yet, but there was so much I wanted to and assumed I would do in my teen years, and now that it’s just a few months from being over, I reflect back and see a childhood and adolescence spent being the “perfect child” and “focusing on the future”. I’ve always accepted that school and future career are all that matters and any other activities and relationships are a waste of time that can be done better and be more fruitful in adulthood and thus, until end of high school I spent every free minute studying beyond the curriculum or practicing piano, being unimpressed by my peers talking about using Tinder or going to parties. I never got to have a best friend or group of friends with whom I’d have sleepovers and adventures. Once I started uni, I did the same, putting no effort into making friends because every second is one I could spend studying. I did much more than I had to but I was proud of my work then. I assumed skipping two years of school would mean I’d be way ahead and have more leeway in the future, and didn’t see any problem since I’d always been mature for my age. But, now I realise this has forced me to deal with problems for adolescents going through puberty together with problems of the real world. In 2.5 years I’ll graduate and be a doctor - it’s just non-stop from here. I’ve never felt strong feelings for any guy, never felt a selfless love in a beautiful and strong relationship. Hell, I’ve never even truly liked someone and I doubt I ever will. I’ve tried to fake it, convince myself I’m into a guy, but it never worked. I think marriage is just when you get to a certain age and just settle with someone who’s just good enough, but I always wanted to experience the “love” that everyone romanticises. I have no time to meet anyone, and never will. I never had the chance to because I was focused on the one single aspect of my life this whole time. I’ve missed the opportunity for young, innocent love and am entering a new age where motives for dating will not be pure. I spent nearly 20 years looking down on and being afraid of everything that makes youth YOUTH, and now it’s too late. But hey, at least I’ll be a doctor right? Even though I no longer view success the same way I did four years ago...

Feeling unsure of studying and struggling with work.

replies: 4

Hi there, I’m 24 years old and for almost a year and a half now, I’ve been studying a masters of social work. I enjoyed it last year, but between everything this year with Covid I’ve come to feel like I don’t want to study anymore. I’m going onto placement in 2 months and I’m petrified, I’ve been told this is normal but I just feel so worried and unsure of myself. How about supposed help others if I’m a mess? On top of that, I work in a retail environment that has not shut down at all during these times. So I’ve been juggling the two. I guess I’m wondering if anyone else has felt like this and what are some things I can look at doing to help me move forward.

school work and friendships

replies: 2

hi everypne im back head is a mess right now so i’ll write this post as clearly as i can quarantine has really messed up everything but mainly my work ethic n stuff so basically i have stacks and stacks of overdue work. i have to complete everything by the holidays becuase im definitely going to fail all of my classes i i dont and also move schoosl. i keep getting told how capable and smart i am and multiple family members have expressed how disappointed they are and others have said how theiyre counting on me. the constant emails from teachers are really overwhelming and i just dont know what to do also i just have a feeling some of my friends dont like me. theyve been talking to me less and teasing me about having to move wchools and its stressing me out, ive told them to stop and i know theyre just joking and they dont intend to be rude or ehatever but it hurts. my closest friend has also been kinda aggressjve towards me. only 2 of these friends have actually said that they dont want me to move but the others have just continued teasing me and it makes me feel unwanted i do nothing but sit on my phone waiting for a text or just on tiktok. my only motivation is that ill actually be let out of the house if i finish my homework but even that doesnt seem to do it. ijust want to sleep. i feel useless i know the homework part is all my fault but i just need help on where to go from here. thanks for reading

Flashbacks re being unwell at Uni

replies: 7

Hi there, I'm wondering how people at University have coped when they have got mentally unwell and had to pull out of a course.... When they redo a course, how do they cope with flashbacks... - memories of being unwell trying to cope I've been in the situation for example, when I was on an antidepressant and it was upped was like a zombie so I pulled out all courses but one but still couldn't do it so I had to drop out of it... I've been in the situation when I was put on an antidepressant and got antidepressant induced hypomania and then had to pull out... I've also been in the situation where I was having sleep issues and affecting my concentration I was told that intelligent people need less sleep by my mother and tried to continue I've also been in the situation where I've made an appointment with a psychiatrist waited 2 months for the appointment and had my referral rejected and had to wait another two months for an appointment when during this time I felt intermittently suicidal and sleep and concentration issues and the semester's started and put on a medication but I didn't feel better from it.... so I tried to hang on and had to drop out but my mother suggested I still sit in the lectures... but the next time I did the courses I get flashbacks of not being able to concentrate and remembering feeling suicidal With this COVID-19 situation, I'm at home which has made me depressed (because when I've been depressed or mentally unwell I've been at home) so I've had to pull out.. (I can't have antidepressant medication) Basically, it's making my life hell... No one seems to understand the impact... Problem is I'm feeling isolated at Uni due to this... Because I've been doing a reduced course load anyway... so yeah, it's not something you can talk about... And I don't think any of psychologists I have been to have had this... I did have one psychologist mentioned that her practical arrangements in Uni got mucked up so she had to do it the next year but that's not exactly the same thing... I also get the association of being unwell with Uni sometimes with places and courses and stuff... The thing is I don't have any friends at Uni (like I tried making connections with people this semester but COVID-19 struck and then I got contacted for help with assessment items). Sometimes I wonder when I have seeing people in groups whether it also makes me feel isolated being at Uni... Do people get well re depression and hence haven't had this problem multiple times?

Fibro

replies: 1

Im 19 I have Tourettes, anxiety and depression. After 6+ years of sickness and pain I have finally been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. now every problem I have all makes sense and it makes me so happy that they found something, everyone who said the pain is in my head is now proven wrong, but at the same time im sad. im 19, I have no energy, im tired, im sore everywhere among so much else this isn't usually diagnosed until average age 45, It developed young and only 3-6% of the world have it I don't feel so trapped anymore as for ages it was an ongoing circle of all pain and sick and no results (fibro doesn't show on any test) and now I know, but I feel kinda more alone and still stuck for an answer as to what I can do. im working with a team to help manage my symptoms but it'll never be cured, there is no cure and every day will bring some degree of pain. My partner is lovely and mum is helpful, but they just don't all understand. on the outside I look happy to them as I found something, but in reality im scared because I know what can happen and know I will never have it quite as easy as others, I get told just not to think about it but obviously its not just that easy I don't know, I just feel stuck but in a different way

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

I want to move schools but I can't, how do I cope with this? replies: 7

I have so many things wrong with me replies: 7

I used to laugh, now my personality has changed replies: 2

Failure replies: 4

Am I normal? replies: 8

I feel like I’ve wasted my youth replies: 2

Feeling unsure of studying and struggling with work. replies: 4

school work and friendships replies: 2

Flashbacks re being unwell at Uni replies: 7

Fibro replies: 1