Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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i don't know what to do anymore

replies: 2

i dont want a job, i dont want to exercise, i push people away, if i try something and i'm shit at it then i never want to do it again. i hate myself and i have no idea what to do

Struggling with being unhappy + breakup help.

replies: 3

My girlfriend left me a week ago. Bit of backstory on when things headed downhill. December we were fantastic, exploring new things together and we both have agreed even during the breakup that we were happy. suddenly she stopped putting in effort to see me, she had things going on that made it difficult. Months went on like this, I got increasingly frustrated. I blamed her for it all, I was trying so hard to see her and it was like a fort wall. This went on for 8 months, barely seeing eachother until last week she told me she didn't think it was healthy and that she had every intention of trying to work things out. I instantly was crushed by it. I channelled that sadness to exercise, and haven't contacted her since. Now I'm beginning to realise my flaws and that my problems were a lot more subtle but possibly more influential. Nothing was enough for me. Even in December when I was "happy", I was pushing her for more, Despite it taking a great deal of effort from her. I realise now that no matter how far we went it wasn't ever enough for me. I realise I placed all my happiness on her, and constantly argued with her when she wouldn't make effort. I think about how that looked from her perspective; She was worried one mistake from her would send me into a dark place.(History of mental health) I realise that it wasn't her that made me unhappy. I was unhappy with my life and I was making it her job to fix it. She said she cherishes every moment we had together, but thinks the relationship is unhealthy and blames herself for not making effort (saying it was all her fault and she was sorry). You can imagine my guilt now. Nothing I did was attractive behavior, it's no wonder the consequence. I have watched seminars, Ted talks, the lot. They say a person needs to be happy on their own before a relationship can be healthy. I believe I truly love her, and I accept the consequence of my failure. So my question is, how do you become happy when you are alone? Where do I start? I don't think I am depressed in the general sense, I just don't know how to be happy. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you for reading. Ps. I would appreciate advice on getting another chance with her. My plan is to wait a couple weeks to a month of no talking and reach out to get some of this off my chest, for my sake and hers. I don't expect a fairytale, and I think if I got another chance now I would doom it again. I want to be happy for my sake first, not just for her.

I had a panic attack in front of my parents and know they know about my anxiety

replies: 2

I have had anxiety for a few years and recently it has gotten so bad to the point of panic attacks. After a panic attack in front of my parents they wanted me to go see a GP. This increased my anxiety and I started to pick at my nails as well as getting heart palpitations and a sickening feeling constantly. Finally when I got to the appointment I started to cry and could not stop I think I may of had another panic attack. The doctor was really nice and handled it very well so I was not overly embarrassed. I did get worried when she started talking about my thyroid and getting me to get a blood test. What does the blood test show? Could my anxiety be caused by a medical condition? And what is the doctor going to do when we meet next?

i don't know why im posting something

replies: 3

I'm nervous as its my first time posting on here, but I often come to read other people's posts. I'm not okay at the moment. Every aspect of my life is becoming a struggle, and I'm not at all happy. For a the past 1.5/2 maybe even 3 years I've been up and down mentally. Earlier years I was mostly feeling good, but would have moments where I wasn't. Fast forwards to now- I feel awful. I hate school and hate feeling the way I do. The most frustrating part is that it is SO hard to explain. I have love and support from my parents who always want to help me (and d0 help me), but I can't fully open up. Nobody knows I feel much worse inside than it may seem on the outside. I hate school, not because of the workload (I tend to get good grades), but because of the environment. I do have friends (not many), but I feel lonely in class at school where I have nobody. I fear judgement every minute, and its exhausting. I dont feel like I'm even living the life I want to- but I don't even know what that is. I feel empty, sad, frustrated, scared and overwhelmed. I feel extra worse at the moment cause I JUST started my first job. I thought it would help me but I just feel like I can't handle it right now. In fact, I can't handle anything and I just feel like giving up. I feel like throwing everything away and not doing anything anymore- i feel like disappearing for a while i guess. Ive benn stuck in a trap for so long and it just gets worse and worse. So I dont even know if what i just wrote made any sense. It was all over the place but so is my mind.

No one understands

replies: 1

Hiya all, I really struggle with having my family and some of my support team understand my Mental Health and I’m apparently faking it when I’m not. I struggle with several mental health issues. BPD, Anxitey and Depression are the worst ones.... I just want family to understand. It’s not easy having unsupportive family when you are struggling. I keep putting on a mask that everything is okay when it isn’t. It’s a struggle some days keeping the mask on.

dropping out of high school- what do i do now

replies: 14

I am 17 and this year is supposed to be my final year of high school (year 12). I mentioned in another post that due to anxiety and depression that resulted in me not passing a couple of my classes, instead of graduating this year I would be graduating in 2021. Basically spreading out year 12 over two years. I was hesitant to make this decision at first, because of what people might think (don't care about that anymore) but more so, I wasn't sure it would make much of a difference to my mental health. But I decided it would put less stress and pressure on me, and that was that. So I thought.. I didn't attend headstart classes at the end of last year. I don't even know what subjects I'm doing and I'll probably wind up with subjects I don't really like because I missed out. I've been pretty happy these summer holidays, going to the beach, hanging out with friends/family, etc. Majority of the days/moments where I felt anxious, depressed or upset were when I was reminded of the approaching school year. On Jan 1st, I quite literally broke down in tears telling my mum I couldn't go to school anymore. I can't do it anymore. For 5 years I've been struggling, I've seen multiple professionals, been put on medication, created plans with teachers, moved schools... and I still can barely get through a school year. And I'm smart, I get good grades, I enjoy learning. But I don't like school. I can't stand it. I guess I want to drop out. I literally don't know how to finish high school. Doesn't matter if I could graduate this year, or next year, I can't do it. I am so exhausted of feeling like shit all the time. The problem is if I drop out I'm not entirely sure what to do. Like I could go do a course at tafe, but I wouldn't know which one to do and where it would take me. Like could I somehow go to tafe now and then go to uni later? If it helps to know, I was interested in doing a media and communications course at uni. My interests are travelling, writing and photography. If anyone knows what my options are if I leave high school, please let me know. I don't want to end up working at maccas or whatever for the rest of my life, I want to accomplish great things. But i swear if I went back to high school, I would burn myself out in no time. I'm already holding on by a thread. I don't think I could handle another year of struggling with school. I don't think I've properly enjoyed my life in 3 years and I can honestly say it's because of school. I just want to live my life

No One Understands

replies: 1

Hi I am a 16 year old girl and I have been experiencing mental health for at least 6 years. From a young age I was always the big child and that always make my Dad pick on me telling me I should stoping eating so much, or that I should be embarrassed about my weight, this went on for 2 years and really affecting how I looked at myself, I developed anorexia for the first year, my mother found out and thought that I could just stop, she doesn’t understand how difficult it is, my anorexia turned into bulimia for the next 5 years. Whilst this I found myself crying every night, I always end up hurting myself, I don’t know why? I have always felt like I make things more difficult for my parents, with food, and even grades, I’m not the smartest kid and they always expect me to get high marks, to achieve this I studied 24/7 to reach those high expectations but whilst doing this I developed serious anxiety and a bad habit of stressing, I want to tell them but they are old folk who believe that I’m making it up and it will just go away. My uncle passed away from depression while my dad was young, my dad felt like he was making it up. what do I do?

Advice on relationship-y stuff and self-image

replies: 42

Hi folks! Hope you're all doing ok. So, I'll try to keep this relatively short (though in doing so I will leave out a bunch of the story). About a year ago, I got friendly with this girl and developed feelings for her. I was going to ask her out, but wanted to know what my friends thought of her before I asked. Basically, no more than a week after I introduced her to my best friend he asked her out (I hadn't told him I was going to, etc.). This hurt a bunch but I kept it to myself for a long time, and I progressively got worse emotionally. Eventually I told them, which didn't really help me at all - in fact this made it worse. They were nice about it, and supportive, etc. (they were my two best friends at this stage). Eventually, they stopped dating and she started dating another guy (who is now also one of my good friends). I now don't know if I like her or not, I'm really confused - I guess I'll figure it out eventually - but I'm not over it by any means (though a lot better than I was). I don't want to blame this completely, but I think it heavily influenced my poor/relatively unhealthy self-image. She is the only girl I have been this close to so I guess a part of me perceives her as a 'representation' of the female sex (which I know is not logical and is wrong in a number of ways). But anyways, I've never seen myself as anything close to society's standards of good looking, my friends are objectively much more attractive than I by these standards. This wasn't a problem before but is now. Basically, it feels like I'm just feeling sorry for myself for not getting the girl, and I'm kinda convinced that I have no chance in the 'relationships' area due to the self-image issues (with the above story as 'evidence' of how incompetent I am in this regard). Its a lot more complex then this, but anyway... any advice you could give would be greatly appreciated, or if you want me to clarify anything or give more details I am happy to do so. I'll also say, recently I haven't been feeling too down, but thought it would be a good idea to talk about it. Thanks

Feeling alone

replies: 2

This is my first time opening up so it's a little bit hard for me. To start off with im 20 years old turning 21 in a couple of weeks. Pretty much i have noticed every year around my birthday i feel really down. Today has been extremely hard for me, im feeling very alone and that i dont fit in. I get the feeling when im around people that they hate me and dont want to be around me. I feel like people are judging me when i walk out of my house. I keep having thoughts that everything would be easier if i didn't exist. Generally just dont have any motivation either. I feel as if im falling behind on my "time line" like i should have graduated from uni this year and have my career sorted - I'm currently a manager at a fast food restaurant and its given me a lot of anxiety because of abusive customers. I just want to enjoy living again and not have these feelings all the time because of this voice in my head

I'm in a bad place and needed to write it down......

replies: 5

So I'm a 16 year old kid whose been going through some stuff. But, nothing particularly bad has happened to me. I started getting overwhelmed and start crying when I'd pack my lunch for school, for no reason, 6 months ago. I thought it was strange, but didn't really address it. After a while of feeling, empty and void of any motivation for basic tasks. I reached out to a friend. He took me to go see the GP and, she said I had major depressive disorder. The diagnoses made sense but, I don't know where it came from. I've always been somewhat pessimistic about the world in general, but that was always just me. Everything was going perfectly in my life, I finally had made plenty of friends, after being teased and excluded for 2 years, my grades where perfect, my life was perfect. And yet, I'm miserable, I feel nothing. I started sleeping in everyday for school and being self destructive. My grades have dropped to the point where I'm not even passing, my rooms a mess, and I just feel, nothing. I just want to feel something again. I can't look to the future with excitement for whats to come, everyday is just another day, they've all moulded into each other and it feels like it wont end. But everyone says theres a light at the end of the tunnel, and I believe them, I just don't see any light yet. Part of me thinks it's because I got everything I ever wanted, the things I thought would make me happy, only to realise happiness is a fleeting moment, I'll always be running on my hedonic treadmill. Waiting for the next thing that'll fill the void. But I think I just stopped running, and I don't know if I ever can again. I don't know if writing here will help me, and I wasn't able to capture how I truly feel in so few words. But I'm drowning. And this, this is me gasping for air. If anyone is reading this, thank-you, and sorry it was so dark, but unfortunately it gets dark without the mask I put on. Yes I know the mask is ironic considering I'm posting this anonymously but still, uno what I mean. Have a nice day, I really mean it.

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

i don't know what to do anymore replies: 2

Struggling with being unhappy + breakup help. replies: 3

I had a panic attack in front of my parents and know they know about my anxiety replies: 2

i don't know why im posting something replies: 3

No one understands replies: 1

dropping out of high school- what do i do now replies: 14

No One Understands replies: 1

Advice on relationship-y stuff and self-image replies: 42

Feeling alone replies: 2

I'm in a bad place and needed to write it down...... replies: 5