Young people

I feel like school is killing me

replies: 1

I'm a 17 year old girl and i'm just coming to the end of my year 11 exams. its a relief, to say the least. I suffered with terrible anxiety last year and thought that i had finally grasped a hold of it this year but it is proving quite the opposite. ... View more

I'm a 17 year old girl and i'm just coming to the end of my year 11 exams. its a relief, to say the least. I suffered with terrible anxiety last year and thought that i had finally grasped a hold of it this year but it is proving quite the opposite. anxious thoughts are taking over me and are making me feel incredibly sad and emotional. i feel like school is a massive culprit in this. My friends are all really nice people, but I can't help but be annoyed when they speak. I've recently become an extremely irritable person, and will avoid my friends, or avoid talking to them, just so i won't get irritated by them. This has left me feeling quite lonely, i suppose. All my friends are supportive still, its not like they have stopped talking to me. Its just i can't help being annoyed by them, even if they are saying something worthwhile. I am constantly comparing myself to other people - especially results wise. I am a straight A student but i can never think of it as a good thing because one girl is always ahead of me. For me, it wouldn't matter if I got a 98% result if this other girl got 99%. Id still feel like a failure. I can't stop this comparison, and with comparison comes self depreciation and being upset and stressed. I compare myself to other people in lifestyle aspects, for when my friend tells me she's done some yoga or gone for a walk, just because i haven't done that i immediately see myself as lesser. Its horrible and this comparison contributes massively to my anti-socialness of late. When people talk about themselves, all i can think about is how terrible I am in comparison. comparing their best qualities to my worst. Along with all this comes the stress of exams and assignments, and I've just been left with wanting it all to go away. Please help me or give me some advice... i don't know how i can change my thoughts. they are overtaking me and are making me feel sad and anxious all the time.

I have nothing to hide, so here we go...

replies: 25

I'm only three days into taking my antidepressants. I'm taking an SNRI each day, and I feel horrible. No energy, no motivation. I'm throwing up, I have headaches, my entire body is sore. I'm only 16, so I've had to take the past 3 days off of school ... View more

I'm only three days into taking my antidepressants. I'm taking an SNRI each day, and I feel horrible. No energy, no motivation. I'm throwing up, I have headaches, my entire body is sore. I'm only 16, so I've had to take the past 3 days off of school because I just can't concentrate, and also my school counsellour recommended it. I know the effects of anti-depressants take weeks to kick in, but I don't know what to do until then. I don't live with either of my parents. My mother never really wanted anything to do with me, so I was raised by my father. However when I was around 7 or 8, I was 'molested' by him. And it took me until about a month ago to tell someone, and that was my guidance counsellour. I don't know what took me so long to tell someone, but I felt better for doing it. I moved out, and about a week ago it all kind of started hitting me at once I guess. I cry every day now, and I'm no longer the person I used to be. I live with my aunt and her boyfriend, and they are constantly trying to suggest activities for me to do to try and lift my mood. Sports, clubs, going out. But I reject them all, because none of them interest me anymore. I have zero motivation to do anything really. These pills are making me feel even less motivated as well. Ehh My school work is being affected too. I haven't been able to concentrate or understand much of my work for a while now, but I assume that my aunt and teachers think it's because I'm the 'typical teenager' who doesn't want to work. But it's not that. As soon as I read my work, I forget it instantly. I'm in my second last year of school, so I can't afford to fail now. A couple months ago I was self harming, and smoking. I've stopped both because I realise neither are going to help me. I've been having suicidal thoughts for quite a while now too. I've told my 2 counsellours and my doctors. I've gone into much detail with my thoughts, such as when and where, how... but the thing that stops me every time is my aunty, I would never be able to do that to her.,, I guess what I'm asking for is help. I'm on medication yes, but I just need help. My mind is all cloudy and confused,

How do you deal with the problems life throws at you?

replies: 3

I have had a lucky upbringing. Both parents where doctors right, they would take me on holidays, to amazing culturally rich places. I was sent to a private school. Given opportunities that very few kids could even dream of. And yet I am hear. 18, alo... View more

I have had a lucky upbringing. Both parents where doctors right, they would take me on holidays, to amazing culturally rich places. I was sent to a private school. Given opportunities that very few kids could even dream of. And yet I am hear. 18, alone most of the day, diagnosed with ADHD, afraid, self conscious, watching everyone move around me, progressing. Which bring's me to my story, which anyone is welcome to listen too, and if possible give me some instruction. I was a kid, went to school (A Christian college) and rugby union outside of, I was pretty normal, struggled doing my homework when the T.v was on, but never showed signs of hyperactivity. My parents were both doctors and i had two older high achieving brothers. Then sometime within junior school, my two friends and I would play around in the nude, and suddenly one of them told his Dad, a teacher at the school, and I fell out with them, as they put out rumours about what stuff we did. And i freaked out. Luckily, or unluckily i started middle school the next year, at a place over an hour away, a pretty elite private school. And I hoped that word would never reach there of these rumours, as I was in constant fear. For the first two years at my new school, i thoroughly enjoyed it. I made many friends. Then word got out, I came into being a teenager, and suddenly I was the first kid to get chest hair, pimples and become sweat laden. People started avoiding me, and in my distress, I found myself pretty alone. There where still some kids who i would talk to, some extraordinarily nice people mind you. But there where also those who seemed to abandon me. With this my school marks started to crumble, and while little pressure was being put on me by my parents, I felt i had to do well, often reinforcing my mind every morning "i can do it". Start of highschool, and i went to see my first OT, much to my distress, however continued to fail exams, and become more and more socially inept. In my final year of school, I met a girl, who is an extraordinarily good friend, and we are currently living with each other. But alas, my marks did not pick up with confidence. Leading me to here. Not a high enough mark for any course at uni, and now diagnosed ADHD (6months ago), and constantly afraid of failure. Started a tafe course, dropped out 5 months ago, stayed mainly in my room feeling moody and irritable, and can not pick up the courage to get my life back on course. Help?

Is this an ego problem??

replies: 2

Hello, Firstly, sorry I haven't been on here in ages ahh I hope everybody is doing well and staying strong! Secondly. I have heard people say "the world doesn't revolve around you" and "it's not always about you" quite a few times in recent years (wh... View more

Hello, Firstly, sorry I haven't been on here in ages ahh I hope everybody is doing well and staying strong! Secondly. I have heard people say "the world doesn't revolve around you" and "it's not always about you" quite a few times in recent years (when my anxiety and depression really came forward and were diagnosed and stuff). This is because I constantly worry that people are annoyed with me, or dislike me, or are judging me, or will be/are disappointed in me. There isn't really any rational reason for worrying about this, it just happens a lot. But especially if a friend/family member is tired, or grumpy, or whatever, for some reason. It just sets me off worrying. And part of that worry is that I don't like seeing people upset because I want everything to be nice and cute and happy, and I'm downright scared of anger (or anything that leads up to it). But "are you annoyed with me?" is becoming a bit of a thing that I just say a lot when I'm feeling really anxious. I don't know why, it's really hard to stop. But because of this, people get the impression that I have a big ego or something... and from what I can tell, I don't think I do? Like, I'm pretty shy, I love to talk but I also love to listen, I pretty much always put others before myself, I don't like myself much, I'm open-minded and try to be diplomatic... I'm sensitive, but I don't get angry at criticism. Just upset because I already feel like I'm not good enough... but suffering from anxiety and depression, as I'm sure you all know, makes you more self-conscious, self-aware and even self-absorbed at times. I'm just wondering whether this makes me a narcissist or someone with a big ego? Thanks for taking the time to read this xx

Scared to do presentation

replies: 4

Hi all, tomorrow I have to do my last presentation of the year. It's the last big hurdle for me and I want it over. But the last presentation is what set of my anxiety which has lasted for months and been hell. Now I am really scared to do this prese... View more

Hi all, tomorrow I have to do my last presentation of the year. It's the last big hurdle for me and I want it over. But the last presentation is what set of my anxiety which has lasted for months and been hell. Now I am really scared to do this presentation because I know my work isn't amazing and I will be lucky to pass. But what if it goes badly and this just starts all over again? I have never been this nervous about a presentation before. flower_girl

what should i do?

replies: 2

I know I need help but I'm not sure how to get it, I've tried talking to my mum about it but she doesn't care, I get too nervous trying to talk about it with people at school because I live in a small town and all they do is talk.

I feel guilty...

replies: 2

First of all, I still feel like I'm sad for no reason. If you have read my other posts, I explain that I have a chemical imbalance. I am starting to think that maybe it is lot's of little things that happened to me, making it one big problem, which m... View more

First of all, I still feel like I'm sad for no reason. If you have read my other posts, I explain that I have a chemical imbalance. I am starting to think that maybe it is lot's of little things that happened to me, making it one big problem, which made me depressed. I don't know if this could be true. Sometimes I feel like i don't deserve help, even though I know I deserve, even if I have depression for no reason. As my physiologists says "thoughts are just thoughts, they are not facts" and in this case, it is true. I have started anti- depressants last week but i have seriously thought of not going to my physiologist or school counsellor anymore because I thought i was wasting their time. My problem is only small and im wasting their time. I know it sounds silly but thats seriously what i thought. I make problems that dont exist and im getting pretty angry and frustraed with myself. I feel like I need to punish myself because I am sad for no reason. I don't know what to do anymore because I just can't be happy. I also feel guilty because, If i am completely honest, I havent really been trying to get better. My physiologist has said about 3 tactics to stop my automatic thoughts. Ive tried them once or twice but when it doesnt work, i basically give up.I dont know what to do anymore. Please help..beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

emotionally unstable and becoming too much

replies: 2

Hi I'm new here and would really love to speak and know someone here will actually listen. Im 20 years old and my past has recently fallen apart and im still struggling to face it even after several sessions of counselling I lost one of my closest fr... View more

Hi I'm new here and would really love to speak and know someone here will actually listen. Im 20 years old and my past has recently fallen apart and im still struggling to face it even after several sessions of counselling I lost one of my closest friends in 2012. He passed away in a car accident. It still hurts and I dont know when I will come to terms with it. I know crying helps but I feel lost some days.. My family has also fallen apart over the past few years.. my mother stopped all us children (me and my siblings) contacting her side of the family from a young age. I wont understand what went wrong between my mother and her family and I never will because when I ask I get told its none of my . business I talk to my family partially but it no longer feels the same. I have to go behind mothers back in order to communicate and it hurts me to do that but I feel its best. My mother and I do not have a relationship. Its hard being the eldest child of 5.. I get the feeling of worthlessness from my mother which has forced me to move out of home. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and I just really want someone to talk to and will listen and not simply say "get over it"

ups and downs

replies: 1

My first love and I broke up just over a year ago and I'm still having my good days and bad days. Sometimes I can't sleep or I cry myself to sleep.. The thing I think that hurts the most is that we only broke up because he was moving and he said he s... View more

My first love and I broke up just over a year ago and I'm still having my good days and bad days. Sometimes I can't sleep or I cry myself to sleep.. The thing I think that hurts the most is that we only broke up because he was moving and he said he still loved me and that it was really hard on him too but we were together for 2 and a half years and it only took him 3 months to get over me... is it really that easy to get over someone you loved? Now he's getting with other people and I can't help but feel a little betrayed, is that silly? We are still friends but I'm not sure if he even really wants to be friends with me anymore, it's like I'm not important at all, like I don't matter. He comes home and sees all his friends, we'll most of them, but won't come and see me and I literally live around the corner. He doesn't even message me anymore unless I message him first. I just don't know how to feel or what to do..

Seperation anxiety, loss of partner

replies: 7

My now ex boyfriend of 2 years recently broke up with me over the phone last Friday night. We were very in love and there was alot of time invested in our relationship. He lived at my house 5/7 nights per week, and we weren't separated except for whe... View more

My now ex boyfriend of 2 years recently broke up with me over the phone last Friday night. We were very in love and there was alot of time invested in our relationship. He lived at my house 5/7 nights per week, and we weren't separated except for when at work or attending tafe classes. We showered together, slept together and pretty much did every single thing together for 2 years straight. We've never really spent any time apart except for now. We were very close with each others families, almost as if we shared parents. We planned alot of our future life, and our expectations were set for marriage and children and spending the rest if our life together. We went on family holidays to places in the country. We were very involved in eacothers lives. I don't remember times without him being there, and I don't have much of a life without him. After he broke up with me I didn't sleep for 6 days, I couldn't eat or else I'd purge at the thought of feeling sick. I cried hysterically, and had mood swings from feeling better to worse and worse and even worse. Last night I was at a point where I was begging him to take me back, crying and screaming at him on the phone. I am struggling without him. I have this raw empty feeling inside me like I have nothing left to live for, nothing left to give to anyone. I feel worthless and uncomfortable. I'm fidgety, restless and have hot flushes. I have this pain in my chest like I'm being poked with a knife. I feel worried and unstable. I feel like I can't live life without him. My heart is constantly racing and I am obsessing over him and cannot stop thinking about him. Every time I close my eyes I see his face. I find it hard to stop worrying. I've had to leave work and take time off because I am in panic constantly. I am miserable. I feel like I can stop talking to him, but then I feel the need to compulsively message or call him. I worry that if something bad were to happen to him it would be my fault because i didn't try hard enough to keep him with me. I don't know what to do with myself .beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Pinned discussions

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

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All discussions

I feel like school is killing me

replies: 1

I have nothing to hide, so here we go...

replies: 25

How do you deal with the problems life throws at you?

replies: 3

Is this an ego problem??

replies: 2

Scared to do presentation

replies: 4

what should i do?

replies: 2

I feel guilty...

replies: 2

emotionally unstable and becoming too much

replies: 2

ups and downs

replies: 1

Seperation anxiety, loss of partner

replies: 7

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

I feel like school is killing me replies: 1

I have nothing to hide, so here we go... replies: 25

How do you deal with the problems life throws at you? replies: 3

Is this an ego problem?? replies: 2

Scared to do presentation replies: 4

what should i do? replies: 2

I feel guilty... replies: 2

emotionally unstable and becoming too much replies: 2

ups and downs replies: 1

Seperation anxiety, loss of partner replies: 7

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

I feel like school is killing me

replies: 1

I have nothing to hide, so here we go...

replies: 25

How do you deal with the problems life throws at you?

replies: 3

Is this an ego problem??

replies: 2

Scared to do presentation

replies: 4

what should i do?

replies: 2

I feel guilty...

replies: 2

emotionally unstable and becoming too much

replies: 2

ups and downs

replies: 1

Seperation anxiety, loss of partner

replies: 7