Young people

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romantic_thi3f Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies
  • replies: 50

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are i... View more

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

Sophie_M NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first
  • replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindfu... View more

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

All discussions

nat_97 The "Too late" girl
  • replies: 1

"Nat takes far too long" That was the very words my student report said three years in a row, all written by different teachers. My habit of taking far too long in completing activities was apparent in primary school. I would be so absorbed in the mo... View more

"Nat takes far too long" That was the very words my student report said three years in a row, all written by different teachers. My habit of taking far too long in completing activities was apparent in primary school. I would be so absorbed in the moment I would simply forget about time. My mother was genuinely concerned how these exact words would appear in my report every year, but I simply brushed it off. Fast forward to now at age 24 and completing my last year of studying, I'm really starting to see the problem escalating over the years. I took an interest in graphic design and studied it in TAFE while working. I loved them both, but at the same time I was very scared and conscious of my peers judging my every move. My workflow for both slowed down and soon enough, I was hit yet again with those very words by both my teacher and boss - "you take far too long". I broke down, skipped a lot of classes and ended up paying the hefty price of finishing 8 overdue assignments in a week. After taking a year break, I quit my job and continued my studies in University, hoping I would toughen up with the more academically strict deadlines. The problem in fact reached its peak. Every time I started an assignment, those "too late" words would echo in my head and I would start questioning my every move. "Is this the most efficient way? Am I taking too long? How long should I be taking to finish this? Does other people take this long?". Studying a design course that encourages experimentation meant there was no definite rules to anything. I left my assignments to the last minute a lot, not wanting to face my emotions of doubt and fear, and skipped classes too to avoid the critical feedback sessions. I made myself feel worse by handing a lot of overdue assignments, creating an endless cycle of guilt and disappointment. Now I'm in my last year and I am still struggling with my subjects, finishing an overdue assignment while trying to survive my internship. I really do enjoy my studies and would love to make it as my dream job, but seeing how slow and sensitive I am, I'm questioning if I am suited for this creative field. I want to change. I don't want to be the "too late" girl anymore. I've attempted multiple times to manage my time effectively, but I keep failing from feeling overwhelmed by negative emotions. Someone please advise me how to get out of this vicious cycle. Anything on time management, dealing with fears of peers, failure, doubt and judgement.

Loligiggles Lost my ability to be creative?
  • replies: 8

So, I've lost the ability to be creative, like in the way I used to when I was a teenager and now, at 23, seemingly lost all of my creativity. Is this just me, or have others experienced this?

So, I've lost the ability to be creative, like in the way I used to when I was a teenager and now, at 23, seemingly lost all of my creativity. Is this just me, or have others experienced this?

Mina_trying_to_study Studying struggles
  • replies: 3

Hi I’m Mina and I just wanted to use this space to rant/vent/express thoughts and get some empathy, support, or advice. My main issue today is that I missed the deadline for a weekly online test that I have for one of my courses. Negative self talk l... View more

Hi I’m Mina and I just wanted to use this space to rant/vent/express thoughts and get some empathy, support, or advice. My main issue today is that I missed the deadline for a weekly online test that I have for one of my courses. Negative self talk like “I’m an idiot, why did I leave it to the last minute?” kinda comes up as I write this now. I studied for 4 hours on this unit but because I’m already behind, I spent most of those hours on a topic that wasn’t related to the quiz. Now there *is* a safety net embedded into the assessment of weekly quizzes, you can safely miss three and still get full marks if you do well on all the others. This was the third one I missed so rationally it shouldn’t be much to worry about. The combined scores only weigh up to 3% of my grade too. But I can’t help but feel disappointed. Like I failed. I was completing it right up until the deadline but unfortunately finished the last question just after the minute the deadline ended. This triggered panic like how am I ever going to catch up. I feel like, despite the fact that I procrastinate as a way to cope with anxiety and overwhelm, when I do study, I study “hard”. I exert so much effort and put so much pressure on myself (not the best thing to do, I know) but will it be enough? Will my effort be worth it? When will I reap the reward? I’ve struggled with starting uni a few times. I’ve deferred those times, after finding it was too much. My goal this semester is to just pass. So again rationally, I shouldn’t be putting this much pressure. But I do. I’m a perfectionist. I also know, it’s not about studying hard, but studying efficiently so how do I get myself out of my current perfectionist studying pattern? Anyway, that’s it for now.

Gab_ Are you addicted to pot??
  • replies: 7

Hi people, posting this thread hoping to create an open discussion about smoking pot, the good, the bad and the ugly. Personally, I've been a pot smoker while growing up over the past 7, 8 years. It's been a constant compulsion, it's become part of m... View more

Hi people, posting this thread hoping to create an open discussion about smoking pot, the good, the bad and the ugly. Personally, I've been a pot smoker while growing up over the past 7, 8 years. It's been a constant compulsion, it's become part of my identity and I seek comfort in getting faded. But the biggest determinant of my addiction is the habits that I form. e.g. If I get up and smoke, the same things gonna happen the next day... until all I'm doing is smoking lol When I try to stop, I find that regardless of how determined I am, I'll always make an excuse and pick up the billy again. Then I'm back at it, usually all in... The smart thing to do would be to accept the hiccup and remain determined. It's very possible but drugs don't work that way, pot hijacks the reward system in our brains, meaning when I like something, I'm probably gonna do it again. So it seems like the only way to move forward is to be strong not smoke pot at all. Right? But its not that simple. I've grown up with it and it forms an integral part of so many relationships in my life. This is kind of the identity paradox that I struggle with, that pot is an inescapable part of my life. The silver-lining of this paradox is that I feel as though I know who I am and I can be pragmatic about when I choose to smoke. e.g. I'll only smoke after I've finished work and done everything I had to. This perspective is where I find peace. That's until I get over-worked and I do something stupid. I'd say that the biggest reason I smoke pot is because it detaches me from reality... it's an escape. This brings us to my final paradox, that ignorance is bliss... but it's still ignorance. I think it's easy to forget about the right thing when my mind is clouded. I can be a very impulsive and careless individual when I get too high and my brain doesn't function right. It's not fair to the people around me and it makes me feel like a shell of a man... Then I usually smoke because I'm feeling down. This is my paradox. I chase the blissfulness in the ignorance of my addiction. I know I might be better off if I stop, but I don't believe it. I make excuses, and I justify them because that's how I choose to live. I think no matter what, the most important thing is to stay positive. I hope someone finds this insightful. Does anyone feel the same? Please share :)

viac just struggling
  • replies: 6

I can't find the motivation to get any work at school done, I feel like I'm constantly stressed and under pressure to get practice work turned in and submit uni applications. Just everything surrounding school and all the uncertainty with covid with ... View more

I can't find the motivation to get any work at school done, I feel like I'm constantly stressed and under pressure to get practice work turned in and submit uni applications. Just everything surrounding school and all the uncertainty with covid with trials and hsc has started to trigger more anxiety than normal. Especially not being able to see my friends in person has been hard, and zooming with them is not nearly the same. I've been finding it impossible to get work done or just feel genuinely happy most days throughout the week. People ask if I'm okay and I don't want to be a burden on anyone so I usually answer that I'm doing good, but I'm not actually. I am being relied on for my friends, checking up on them and making sure they are okay, but I don't have much being reciprocated. I just honestly don't know what to do, and need someone to talk to and actually be there for me, I just don't really know.

Richardb3 depressed 19 year old virgin
  • replies: 9

hello to anyone that reads this. I am a 19 year old male who has never had sex, had a girlfriend or even kissed anyone. I feel like a failure as a man. I am very depressed as a result, especially when hearing about other people my age or younger and ... View more

hello to anyone that reads this. I am a 19 year old male who has never had sex, had a girlfriend or even kissed anyone. I feel like a failure as a man. I am very depressed as a result, especially when hearing about other people my age or younger and their sexual experiences. It's like I am a small child still. I had an eating disorder when i was 15 (over it now) which i believe is one of the key reasons as to why i am in this situation now. I regret that period of my life everyday. Now lockdown is really screwing me over because I can't go out and meet people. I have started seeing a therapist but that isn't really helping because i can't go back in time prevent myself from getting to this point. I really hate life and i don't know what to do.

janine is happy I failed a test and I feel like a failure
  • replies: 4

Today, I got my math test which I did miserably. My classmates got better marks than me and I felt jealous. Even my sister got better marks. I then went home and told my parents and they got really mad at me, saying that I would be homeless in my fut... View more

Today, I got my math test which I did miserably. My classmates got better marks than me and I felt jealous. Even my sister got better marks. I then went home and told my parents and they got really mad at me, saying that I would be homeless in my future. I’m currently really sad and have negative thoughts. How do I cope?

Trish2 I feel too insecure in life
  • replies: 2

So, after about 11 years or so, (I'm now 21) I only somehow just came to realise that I may have actually been bullied as a kid. I hung out with a pretty popular group at the time and I felt like I was the odd one out. I'd get made fun of and at time... View more

So, after about 11 years or so, (I'm now 21) I only somehow just came to realise that I may have actually been bullied as a kid. I hung out with a pretty popular group at the time and I felt like I was the odd one out. I'd get made fun of and at times I think I was also physically hurt like I had a hard ball thrown at me (and being jumped on in a pool). At the time I never thought much of it because the adults would laugh it off and say we were having fun and for a long time, I believed it; but I came to realise that it's affected me well into my teenage years and even later which I never expected. I've been so insecure in many areas throughout almost my whole life because I've never felt like I was good or cool enough to hang out with people who may have been more like-minded to me than I would have thought. As a result, I think I've missed out on A LOT. I've purposely avoided trying to make friends with those who actually seem really awesome simply because I didn't feel worthy enough or perhaps I was scared of getting rejected. I've got no clue where to go from here since it's been engraved in my mind that I'm not good enough from an early age and It's just crazy to think I only notice this now? I just feel so out of place in life and I'm worried there's not much I can do at this point to change things. I just felt like saying something about it and thanks for taking the time to read this

kirbyGirl Where do I even start
  • replies: 3

I don't even know how to put in writing how I feel anymore, but here we go. Bit of background - for most if not all my life, ive been abused by a father and emotionally and physically manipulated by my mother and sister. I moved out in January this y... View more

I don't even know how to put in writing how I feel anymore, but here we go. Bit of background - for most if not all my life, ive been abused by a father and emotionally and physically manipulated by my mother and sister. I moved out in January this year, and while its been the best decision ive ever made, its also led to a lot of other problems, dramas, and realization. Ive started to realize how much anxiety, depression, PTSD, etc I have - and even become aware of the fact I have had OCD for a long time. Usually i can cope with kind of stuff, and I just work through it, but im finding myself cracking, I feel like I'm falling and I dont know what to do. R recently I found out I am pregnant (accidently) and will soon have to go through an abortion which is so scary to me, and no one seems to really grasp how this is affecting me even though i have mentioned it, the worst part is I cant even have my family with me. Over the span of 4 months ive lost so many friends ive lost count, a lot of the time this was because they were toxic, but recently my friend went off at me because I didnt realize they're pronouns were they/them and accidentally referred to them as she a few times - this is completely my fault as I was very much sheltered and kept from things like this by my toxic family, but it really upset and bothers me because I never want to upset someone like that Ontop of this my current bf doesn't seem to listen to me generally, he tends to ignore me when i express im upset and only realizes he messed up when i start to cry. Theres so much more i can unpack, problems upon problems, and its all just suddenly made me snap i guess you could say - I feel like i want to cry and scream constantly, Im frustrated, and dont want to be around people at all, ive started to go back to old habit thats are extremely bad for me, and i just feel utterly hopeless...i guess when youve suffered for so many years and have people consantly tell you "it gets better" as their response, yet it never does, you really start to lose hope. Anyone have any advice on my situation?

Someone-who-sleeps Life feels so hard
  • replies: 6

I have felt a little broken lately, I don't even know why. I have people who care and love me, I have friends but I feel so down. My friend group has been torn lately, one day they are all happy the next they are tense. I don't know what to do. I als... View more

I have felt a little broken lately, I don't even know why. I have people who care and love me, I have friends but I feel so down. My friend group has been torn lately, one day they are all happy the next they are tense. I don't know what to do. I also feel like school is becoming a pressure and a bit to deal with. I complain so much, my friends and family are sick of it. I haven't cried for a while so that is good...right? I feel like my life is a mess, I just can't keep up with it some days. I feel like I am being petty and I should be complaining about myself. There are many others suffering more.