Welcome and Orientation

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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Loved, Lost, Left.

replies: 3

I recently ended my second serious relationship after 4.5 years. I felt I was unloved and unappreciated. I became what I think was just another household appliance. Fix this, make that, do this and in return I received nothing. My ex partner has 3 young adult and teenage children, her excuse was that she is a mother and she works and has no time for affection. I myself work 70 hours a week, yet I always tried to be a loving, caring partner. Now that I have left the relationship, she wants to make it right. I see here sincerity, but how long will this last, a day, a week, a month, a year? My heart is blackened and I have no more love to give. A loved her and the kids more than I have loved anyone or anything in my life. In my head the best thing for me to do is move as far away as possible and start a new life. Am I being selfish or just doing what I need to do? Please help, thank you

New Dad . . .harder than I would have thought

replies: 6

Hi, I am a new Dad (6month old baby). My wife does most of the heavy lifting in terms of looking after the baby while she is on maternity leave, but for some reason I still feel overwhelmed, anxious, exhausted and so on. I try and help out as much as I can. Our baby is a treasure but I seem to be constantly struggle. Since she was born I had to put down my cat who died in my arms and that tore me up and then wanting to be always around I have given up all exercise which used to be important to me. My wife is very critical of me so much of the time, but with good reason, she is exhausted and worried about returning to work and the load she is carrying. Maybe it is also the state of the world at the moment but I have sensed my anxiety taking hold and my thoughts getting darker every week or so and whether it is my time, because I don’t feel like the great Dad I aspire to be, but then I look at the baby and I am right again. I have also thrown myself into work, likely as a distraction which I gather is pretty common, but it feels like it is all I do and defining me and just feeding more anxiety. I am trying to make a plan to make some changes based on some of the things I have been reading here from other peoples experiences, but the big thing is I don’t know whether to just start making changes to things like work and hope it starts to right things. Or if I should talk to my wife first. . . .I don’t want to add to her stress at all and fear I might in talking about it hence I am thinking to try changing the path a bit without talking. Finding time for exercise is the big one that I can’t do without talking to her. Take care,

How to get help

replies: 2

HiI'm an older person with a dx of BPD, C-PTSD and anxiety/depression. How do people get help? I work part time due to my mental health. I have paid over $3000 this year in psychiatrists and psychologist fees and have got nowhere apart from broke. I have spent 5 days, full days being passed from pillar to post trying to get help in the public sector. Apparantly because I have 'officially' a psychologist I cannot access a Qld Health service, so then I tried a NGO service who advertise a group but don't actually run the group and referred me back to the Qld Health Service. The took all of my info and then referred to the NGO who, under a different name took all of my personal info again, and then nothing ... for 2 months! Called them today and they told me "Sorry, you don't exist in our system". Then told me they will look at their process. I can't get NDIS because I havent had all the therapy available and evidence it doesnt work so I need to get a functional assessment. The functional assessment, without asking me any questions about what it is for is billed at 6-10 hours of work and will cost 2500 - 5000. So that is out. I was told by Qld Health that I should take private health insurance. I checked out this option to find out that it will cost $175 a week for my age and I have to pay $750 excess to start using it. So I ask, how does anyone get any help for their mental health? I am sick to death of people telling me how resilient I am and how strong I am. I need help, and I am fortunate, and privileged that I am intelligent and persistent enough to keep going, but I am exhausted from having to battle to be heard and helped.

Panic attacks

replies: 1

Hi. Wonder if anyone can help me get through these panic attacks. Feeling over anxious.Feeling guilty as I know people are worse than me. Thank you.

The Long Haul

replies: 2

HiI'm a long time sufferer of major depressive disorder, I am also diagnosed with complex PTSD & general anxiety disorder.Things have not been going well for me of late. I am having trouble finding a suitable job, my mother's health is deteriorating rapidly, my so-called friends have acted in ways that friends just wouldn't act.I have been sleeping 12–16 hours per day even though I have a lot of things that I need to get done, I just can't muster the energy to do them.I used to be on various antidepressants, that for me personally, did more harm than good in the end, I spent some time in a mental health ward due to this. I then weened my way off of them over a couple of"unpleasant"years.Though I have contemplated suicide, I can't take that way out, it would be unfair to my kids & my dog.I would like to try some of the newer psychotherapies that are available, being a truck driver (unemployed) there are some that are just not an option though.My regular GP, whom I liked, moved on to another town & I need to find a new GP. This has contributed to my overall deteriorating mental health too.There is much I have left unsaid here.I'd be willing to do some counciling but finding a councillor that I am comfortable with is not easy.Thanks for reading.

My best friend is friends with the one that bullied me

replies: 1

It’s taken a bit to write in hereI have felt quite isolated and have so much doubt and shame my recent experience with being bullied has left me unable to trust people with any of my deepest feelings it’s soul destroying I don’t even know how to talk about what has happened and is still happening to me Ad I’m always the strong one and I always brush my feelings aside and just deal with the situation but not this time

Newbie

replies: 4

Hello Everyone,I am new to the blue voices so am here to introduce myself. I am a mum, wife and psychology honours student. I found myself on this path after suffering a sudden and extreme PTSD attack after the birth of my second child. If it weren't for my husband advocating for me then, I don't know where I would be now. As well as finding out that I had been living with PTSD, undiagnosed for over 20 years, I learnt that my "quirks" were actually severe anxiety and OCD. I wasn't actually a high-achieving, leader type, I just operated out of fight or flight constantly making me a chronic people pleaser. There is a lot more to this story, but suffice to say, through this I felt called to study psychology, and I love it. I can not wait for the day I can help others and I hope that this will afford me the opportunity to do that in a meaningful way, as well as advocate for mental health by telling my story.

New and Some questions

replies: 8

Hello. I have joined today as part of trying to move forward. I have just started counseling and have had a few short sessions in the past a few years ago. It has dredged up some dreadful memories of childhood that I have buried, and i don't know how or even if I want to tell my counselor. I have admitted to myself and my carer that I have had thoughts about not wanting to live anymore and how much I do not want to be in pain anymore, but also that I love my life when things are good and want to achieve so much more. I have T10 incomplete paraplegia and the nerve pain is extremely bad at night when I want to be asleep. The problem is my counselor said I now have PTSD and I am having trouble sleeping, with nightmares. He has given me a sleep book. I want to know if I share this with him, about the childhood issue and feelings of the above will this remain confidential, even having discussed it here. It is not easy to talk about these things. My cousin Joe committed suicide a few years ago and that was an incredibly profound time as I was learning to walk again when it happened. No one knew how he felt. T cam very much unexpected and a shocm to his family.

Financial stressors

replies: 3

I'm betting a lot of people are probably in worse boats than me in that regard. I don't see myself earning enough to actually ever retire from working. My best bet is ensuring without fail I'm on $60k a year for an additional 23 years or 75k for 15 years, no gaps, no unemployment, no taking a lower wage, obviously no plans on affording children or dependants on that figure. I work in a horrible toxic workplace in an awful industry, that job sure as ***" isn't going to last an additional 15-23 years. It's probably going to last another 2-5 years. I don't really have that many options for alternative employment. I have enough money to give up on life and probably unalive myself in 10 years if I move to a poor country and honestly that option is so tempting. It's been really hard to strike the balance of well let's try to make what you need to actually be able to retire in the future vs let's just work the bare minimum for bills and maybe one luxury a year.

Anxiety Issues

replies: 4

Hello, I'm in my mid-20s and live in suburban Sydney. I've struggled with anxiety for most of my life due to growing up in an environment where my parents were quick to yell at me (and each other). Due to their lack of support, I haven't been able to seek help from a GP, though I do plan on seeing one about it in August. My low self-esteem, tendency to put pressure on myself, and fear of failure lead to me locking up and shutting down in highly stressful situations. This has already cost me one job, and it may cost me my second after only two weeks. I need to change things if I'm going to hold down a job, and so I came here. I hope the content I find here, along with the other methods I'm trying, will help me turn things around. Nice to meet you all!

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Loved, Lost, Left. replies: 3

New Dad . . .harder than I would have thought replies: 6

How to get help replies: 2

Panic attacks replies: 1

The Long Haul replies: 2

My best friend is friends with the one that bullied me replies: 1

Newbie replies: 4

New and Some questions replies: 8

Financial stressors replies: 3

Anxiety Issues replies: 4