Would anyone care?

[Guest_2350]

Hey,

my last suicide attempt is over 2 years ago and I’m so frustrated that nothing has changed. I know the world is not just about me, far from it, but I don’t feel I can talk about how I feel, get some supportive words and not get taken away by an ambulance. I still find it incredibly hard to navigate my thoughts and feelings within this world without getting locked up. I still have feelings and I don’t want to be palmed off. It’s all just pretty talk about RUOK and mental health; but nothing changes. I remember when I was close and I felt as abandoned as I did as a child. It makes me incredibly sad and angry because two of my friends lost their lives the year I let attempted. 

[Guest_2350]

Hi Rarra

Thank you for sharing your experience with me. It sure is a lonely place. I don’t really like talking about anyone in the real world about it unless talking to a nurse when they know I’m kept safe in hospital. I’m too unpredictable for myself so I don’t want to burden others to make decisions for me. Then they’d feel guilty if they think they missed signs and I don’t want that. With the people I told when I attempted it’s a bit of a taboo subject for them. That’s ok. I know it’s my job to look after myself and make decisions.

[therising]

Hi Guest_2350

The world is definitely an angering place. I've found many people I've come across in life to be thoroughly angering, stress inducing and even depressing. So much in this world closes the minds of people while those who are forced to face the impact of the closed minded suffer in so many ways.

You have a wisdom that surpasses many. While society loves to celebrate those who it regards as intelligent (based on IQ tests that 'prove' intelligence), I believe there is an incredible intelligence that sadly goes unrecognised, one that is vital for a world that needs to evolve beyond destructive limitations. It is an intelligence that comes with experience and wisdom. It is one that comes from those with an open mind who see the world and all its obvious faults, while sadly suffering through those faults.

It's interesting, what you say about the K-10 test. Watched a brilliant documentary called 'Crazywise' which questions how much of the DSM IV is actually covering the many natural sides human nature. Is it deciding mental illness when in fact there's more to it? A couple of examples: Are we born to naturally sense what's depressing, so as to be able to recognise the need to manage what's depressing. Do we remain in that state of consciousness, aware and feeling what's depressing, until we find our way out of it? Are we designed this way for good reason? Another, are we naturally born to have multiple facets of us come to life, bit by bit? Are we meant to consciously manage each facet as it comes to life? Are we designed to hear and manage the different aspects of our self when they speak to us for whatever reason? Does the inner sage come to life in us in order to fight the inner demons or inner critic we sometimes hear?  With a change in natures we sometimes experience, depending on what part of us has been triggered to life, consciously or non consciously (such as the intuitive sage or the depressing critic), is the DSM IV an easy way of labeling what's actually natural in some cases yet unbearable as long as it remains misunderstood?