Here at bb forum we regularly suggest ways to avoid suicide thoughts and planning. Things like- a change of environment which could be as basic as a walk around the back yard, a call to lifeline, talking to a friend and so on.
I suggest time might well be your greatest gift to yourself. How often have you said to yourself or a family member "I feel much better than yesterday"? How often have you been stressed and a partner offers you a drink and chat, then you feel better?
Time is a tool for delay, an often overlooked method of allowing your distressed mind a break from a traumatic period. Why is it not thought of.? My theory is that one is caught up in the moment, a feeling of entrapment, no escape other than taking one's life.
To get personal, I inadvertently gave myself some minutes of reflection prior to my planned act and that short period of time produced a memory of what my father told me 2 years prior "better to be the best part time dad than no father at all". He was referring to my marriage troubles and he already had one son suicide on him. I've always been convinced that up to recalling my father's comment, my thoughts and plans were rushed, desperate and lethal.
The topic is raw, it's also tragic. Being kind to yourself a phrase we use here often, can include some time to let your mind regroup, return to a more relaxed state...to be calm. Be aware that a desperate mind is a rash one, one whereby you are not rational, maybe not even thinking of loved ones and their future sorrow and grief.
Give yourself the gift of time....a free gift to you.
If time saves you then take the next step of saving yourself and seek help. It's worth the effort.
TonyWK
