Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 92

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Anzacspirit How to forgive yourself
  • replies: 66

How do you forgive yourself when the voice in your head constantly brings up the things you’ve done. If I can’t beat this it will consume me and that will be it. The only advice my psych has given me is that I’m not a bad person, I just made a mistak... View more

How do you forgive yourself when the voice in your head constantly brings up the things you’ve done. If I can’t beat this it will consume me and that will be it. The only advice my psych has given me is that I’m not a bad person, I just made a mistake, a bad one at that but I need to forgive myself and move on. It sounds so easy , everything I’ve done just replays. I hate what I did, it’s not me. Others have forgiven me but I just can’t let go. I don’t know how to let go. I want to be free of this darkness that is shadowing me.

Robynn life atm
  • replies: 1

I have recently been told I have social anxiety and depression right, and I have a mental health plan and all of that and I'm currently changing phycologists because I didn't like my old one she was kinda like a mum and would like talk at me and I kn... View more

I have recently been told I have social anxiety and depression right, and I have a mental health plan and all of that and I'm currently changing phycologists because I didn't like my old one she was kinda like a mum and would like talk at me and I know I'm not much of a talker and that's probly why but I felt like I was being mum'ed by her. but problem is with trying to find a new phycologist is that the wait times are really bad. I don't get to see my new one until March. I am in my 6th week of this year at high school and its really stressing me out. there are all these tests and I'm like trying to pay attention and focus but like nothing sticks in my brain, and especially for science I like remember it but use the wrong words and because I'm doing ATAR than its deemed as wrong. I am doing 5 ATAR subject and a cert in sport and rec, which is my favorite class because there is no stress or worry. I really enjoyed dance in my younger years of school and i wanted to do dance ATAR but the only was I could do it is if i skiped straight to year 12 and like its fun and all but 2 lessons before my contemporary technique class I had a panic attack in the middle of class because it was all so much, and then the next day in the afternoon I was practicing in my room because I missed out on leaning something because I had a panic attack I had another one. my parents don't know about any of this I try and hide it from them, I mean they know that I have anxiety and like they take me to my appointments but I don't tell my mum anything, I actually don't really like talking to my parents at all like I kinda wished they didn't care about me I know it seems silly and like why would I say that but I generally don't feel a connection to them anymore and like I don't need them or want them. Another horrible thing that happened is because the first few weeks of this year where really hard and stressful I relapsed with my self harm again. I was like nearly a year free I'm pretty sure, I'm currently 4h and 37 minutes free. This is my way of coping, but if I don't do it than everything will fall apart again. I also quit gymnastics which I had been doing for like 7 years and I don't even really know why but all I know is is cant get myself to go anymore and its been 6months since I last trained.

alexis123 self harm is getting out of control
  • replies: 3

whenever i’m sad or anxious i self harm but at the moment i have been self harming for weeks on end and i don’t know how to break the habit, i’ve done every other trick under the sun to try and stop and all the other methods to try and stop but i can... View more

whenever i’m sad or anxious i self harm but at the moment i have been self harming for weeks on end and i don’t know how to break the habit, i’ve done every other trick under the sun to try and stop and all the other methods to try and stop but i cant, it’s like a release for me and my family doesn’t really care either nor do my friends, how do i stop this ?

Teek The advice is to talk…
  • replies: 16

It annoys me that the advice is to talk to someone but honestly it just seems pointless. There is too much to talk to anyone about, and when you voice it, it seems lame anyway. Especially compared to people going through war, flood, fire, cyclones et... View more

It annoys me that the advice is to talk to someone but honestly it just seems pointless. There is too much to talk to anyone about, and when you voice it, it seems lame anyway. Especially compared to people going through war, flood, fire, cyclones etc. and losing everything. I have no right to be wishing for death when others are desperate to survive.

Baileybasil What do you do when you don’t want to get better?
  • replies: 5

I’ve had emergency services called on me three times recently, they want me to go to the hospital. But I just don’t want to take any effort to change because life doesn’t seem worth it at all to me. I just end up lying so I don’t get taken away.

I’ve had emergency services called on me three times recently, they want me to go to the hospital. But I just don’t want to take any effort to change because life doesn’t seem worth it at all to me. I just end up lying so I don’t get taken away.

inni Suicidal thoughts getting stronger again
  • replies: 32

Hello everyone. I survived attempts. I’ve done recovery programs… I still struggle with the fact that the thoughts stay, sometimes less often, sometimes closer to crisis point. The worst is how I feel about myself, my failed attempts and I don’t see ... View more

Hello everyone. I survived attempts. I’ve done recovery programs… I still struggle with the fact that the thoughts stay, sometimes less often, sometimes closer to crisis point. The worst is how I feel about myself, my failed attempts and I don’t see the world, I can’t feel it, I just can’t feel when I get unwell. I try to push the thoughts away and tell myself it’s just thoughts, but I’ve tried that before and ended in icu. How will this continue? Will it always be that dance? Do people get better after a lifetime of suicidal thoughts? I hate when my life is about staying alive. Surely that’s not enough reason?

geelt Frustrated and stupid idiot that sabotaging life by being a joke of a person who wastes people time incoherfent rambling on a forum
  • replies: 115

Everythings just keeps getting worse because i am stupid and its all my fault and im not going to do anything to change becaused im stupid. I am honestly baffled about how much I am ruining life by being an immature loser. I refuse to see any help ou... View more

Everythings just keeps getting worse because i am stupid and its all my fault and im not going to do anything to change becaused im stupid. I am honestly baffled about how much I am ruining life by being an immature loser. I refuse to see any help outside of university or whatever I can make an excuse to go to without acytually doing anything that will ake a difference. Going to a mental health service by saying im going to study on another campus then spending half an hour walking to the facility to get no help because theres nothing that they can do to help me. Then keeping up the stupid charade 3 times while doing nothing myself to improve my life because there is nothing i can do I cant move out of home my parents dont want me to get a job i am stgupid and let myself listen to the gp and take antidepressants when they wont magically change anything. Then getting frustrated and overwhelmed and break down crying and frustrated going no where with my thoughts then wanting to lie down to calm down but then they make me go outside to walk right next to the busy road and i have to try keep a rational mind when the loud noises just make it worse then when they finally let me lie down they make me go to the hospital even though i keep saying that i cannot stay there at the hospital when they said that the time is unpredicatable when they can see me and then dont give me the option to refuse then leave me at the hospital waiting area for mental health for 8 hours and by then its 10pm and i am just frustrated and overwhelmed and have no explanation to tell my parents then i get frustrated and breakdown then i am no longer able to stay rational then start self-harming becaue its all my fault and im stupid then get stuck in the mental health ward for 2 weeks and it was okay until my parents came to visit and it just made me feel worse. then they made me take medication now I am presently no longer takinf them because they remind me of everything and im too frustrated and stupid medication now i cant sleep because of withdrawl and i keep gettting angry about everything and i cant move out of home and being home makes me frustrated but i am lucky to have a home in the first place but im stupid so i cannot apprecate it because im stupid and i cant move out and my parents dont believe in psychiarist psychologist mental health and it all just makes me frustrated and seeing gp just makes it worse so i leave midway though because im just going to self-harm.

tealflowers robthomaslover (used to be mb20lover)'s thread
  • replies: 104

hi everyone. i hope i posted this in the correct thread, i wasn't sure where to post it. i'm tayla, i used to be mb20lover, but i thought it would be best to make a new account and start fresh. i'm 22 by the way. i couldn't think of a different usern... View more

hi everyone. i hope i posted this in the correct thread, i wasn't sure where to post it. i'm tayla, i used to be mb20lover, but i thought it would be best to make a new account and start fresh. i'm 22 by the way. i couldn't think of a different username, so i thought this one would do. i have missed everyone i have interacted with somehow, and i hope i can try to support others aswell as hopefully getting support for myself, and interacting with people i have in the past, and new people. i hope everyone had a merry christmas and happy new year. - tayla (used to be mb20lover).

Guest_1573 Help..what help??
  • replies: 3

I am totally disillusioned and over everything. My teenage son has been wreaking havoc. punching holes in doors, threatening to kill himself. I rang ambulance and 50 minutes they still did not come. He was then losing it more so I took him to my GP w... View more

I am totally disillusioned and over everything. My teenage son has been wreaking havoc. punching holes in doors, threatening to kill himself. I rang ambulance and 50 minutes they still did not come. He was then losing it more so I took him to my GP who I have known for years. He wrote a referral for a psychologist. That was one week ago. I rang today to enquire and apparently he has a two week wait. What is the point? Meanwhile I am suffering severe anxiety and depression....it is ridiculous. There is no help anywhere!!!! The one time I did call for help I got sent off to a revolting hospital where I was treated like a criminal? This world is a disgusting place. I do not want to be here. I do not want to have to deal with my aggressive head case son. Nothing I do for him is good enough. He might be happy when I am gone as he will at least have a lot of money. I have nothing to look forward to at all. Just more and more of this everyday. I know I will be contacted by BB but again it is all lip service. Nobody cares and that is the truth. So...BB...don't contact me because I won't answer your call and I certainly won't be sectioned in a revolting hospital where I will be treated like trash. I don't know the answer by any means but I can truly say that asking/begging for help and being ignored by everybody certainly DOES NOT HELP.

freddofrog Loneliness and other stuff
  • replies: 3

i have no friends and am so lonely, i am 17 yrs old and have dropped out of hs -at the time i dropped out i experienced a friendship group breakdown, my mh has suffered and i have suicidal thoughts everyday -i now work full time at a daycare doing a ... View more

i have no friends and am so lonely, i am 17 yrs old and have dropped out of hs -at the time i dropped out i experienced a friendship group breakdown, my mh has suffered and i have suicidal thoughts everyday -i now work full time at a daycare doing a traineeship (which i hate) due to the fact that i can barely get out of bed -just today at work i was warned about my behaviour on the job which is seemingly forgetful, messy and 'poor', if i get another one of these warnings i could be fired -if i get fired or quit my mum will kill me -i honestly can't see myself lasting till december (when my traineeship ends) -i ultimately have nobody to talk to and am just really lonely and sad -everyday i experience 100000 emotions and find it soooo hard to complete small tasks w/o feeling overwhelmed or breaking down -am also super sensitive which my boss dislikes and i cant control my emotions especially when im about to cry Any tips to combat these feelings and loneliness?