Need to be kept accountable to help meet goals

[scorch]

Hi everyone.

So as some of you know I suffer from depression and anxiety.  I'm trying to live my life to the fullest, but as anyone who has a mental illness knows, it can sometimes be very difficult to get your butt into gear and do what needs doing,

I am often overcome by feelings of worthlessness and that I am a failure.  I know that these feelings are lying to me, I AM precious and beautiful and worth so much!  I HAVE accomplished many things and will continue to do... but you know, the feelings can still drag you down sometimes.

Anywho... I've been talking to my husband (who is remarkably understanding and patient with my erratic behavior/mood swings) and we've decided to set some goals for us to aim for, so that we can reach our MEGA GOAL which is to undergo IVF treatment and hopefully start a family.

I have PCOS which is a genetic disorder that means it is incredibly difficult to have children.  It also has about a zillion other side effects including high risk of depression, higher risk of diabetes plus plenty of physical effects all which make me feel like a hideous freak who is hardly a woman at all. We've been trying to have kids for 5 years now, but all treatments have come to naught.  We will have to undergo IVF, but it is a long process that costs heaps of money... and we just don't have the funds.  This kind of set us both back and over the last year or so we've been sitting stagnant on the kid's issue and it's been negatively affecting our marriage.

So the other night we decided enough was enough.  We have to get serious about having kids, which means working towards our MEGA GOAL. 

We're going to attack this on two fronts.  First, my husband is trying to pick up some extra work as a security guard as well as his normal day job.  Any money he makes from that is going straight into a special 'baby making' bank account.  He's also been putting aside a little each week for the last couple of years, but now we're hoping to boost that.  I am also putting a little from my wage into the account too.  It's already a struggle for us financially, but we'll make it work because this is something we really want.

The second part of our goal is for me to lose a whole lot of weight so that I'll be in prime fitness when we can finally undergo treatment.  I have to lose about 40kg.  I know that sounds like a lot, but I'm really heavy even though I look like I weigh a lot less  (thank goodness!)

This is where you guys come in.  Because of my depression, I struggle to start things.  It's hard to get out of bed in the morning, so it's really hard to summon the energy to hop on the treadmill and do a workout. 

I've got a home setup of a cheapo treadmill and a rowing/cycling machine, so I've got easy access to equipment and no excuses.  

So it it's not too much trouble, will someone touch base with me once or twice a week to keep me accountable and make sure I'm actually exercising and eating healthily?   Does anyone else need to lose weight and want me to help keep you accountable and on track?  Is there a whole bunch of us that want to get healthier and we could all keep each other accountable?

I hope that some people will think this is a good idea.  When we share the load we can go further than we ever could on our own.

[scorch]

LOL!!! NEIL!!!!  I think I need to proof read my posts so grotty minded people like you don't twist them!  😄  That cracked me up!

Yes, it's a selfie of my shoes in the leaves.  I took it last year.

Report on my weigh in this morning - I've lost another kilo which was definitely unexpected, so yay!  That makes 4 kilos since I started, and I'm excited because now I have to use a different hole on my belt.  So I think I'm finally starting to lose some girth.

[Neil_1]

Hey Scorch

ABSOLUTELY AWESOME.   Congratulations - yes, you've gotta love the old belt and the holes in it - that's a definite positive.

Brilliant.  🙂

Neil

[scorch]

Neil, I smashed my workout yesterday.  Did an hour and a half on bike and treadmill.  I'm happy because Hubby and I have finally got a weekend all to ourselves, so he's dusting off his pushbike and is going to go for a ride along our local rail trail.  I'll be following along on foot lol.  So, not exactly a romantic interlude...but we'll have fun.  I've lived 2km from the start of a rail trail for almost 2 years now, and never been down it once.  It'll be an adventure.

[Neil_1]

Hi Scorch  

May I ask what a rail trail is?  I’m guessing it’s an old abandoned railway line?   But it couldn’t be, because that wouldn’t make for very good cycling.   How far does the rail trail go for, or is it 100’s of km’s?  

 Don’t forget to lump either hubby or yourself with a backpack – for safety (mobile phone and perhaps a bandage – “just in case”), for thirst (water or other kind of drink that you may enjoy – gatorade or the like) and food (apple, banana, a couple of sandwiches – just to keep the body fuelled).  I guess it all depends on how long or how far you’re planning on being out for – but taking a backpack, especially for you is another brilliant way to make the body work harder.  Even if you share carrying it (and I’ll be cheeky here and out of my personal trainer mode just once);  if you get hubby to take it on the ‘out’ trip and then you can take it on the ‘going home’ trip – cause it’ll be heaps lighter on the return journey.  

Congrat on yesterday’s workout – that’s an amazing effort on bike and treadie.  How did you pull up today from that?  Any muscle soreness?  I’m talking actually “good” muscle soreness here.  

Kind regards  

Neil

[scorch]

Oh, in Victoria we have a lot of old, now unused railway lines that have been mostly dismantled.  So the government decided a few years ago to put them to good use and now there are nice little walking/riding trails running either along, or adjacent to, the path that the trains used to take. They go through the little, old towns. Over mountains and rivers... some sections are quite picturesque. All together the rail trails would have to span a few hundred km.  Somehow I don't think I'm quite up to the challenge of going that far yet, lol.  But one line starts in our town, so we're going to follow it until we decide it's time to turn back. 

We were given a gift card for Christmas, so when we spent it earlier this year we decided to buy a couple of 'camelback' backpacks for when we get fitter.  Well, we're going to break them out this weekend and see how it goes 🙂  Good idea about the bandage, I'll make sure to pack a little first aid kit.  I'll make sure we take some food too.  I'm really starting to look forward to this, although I may rethink my optimism once I'm out there and all sweaty and tired lol.

I've pulled up ok after yesterday's session, my calf muscles are feeling a bit tight and sore - and I'm pretty certain the seat of the cycle is imprinted on my butt... but apart from that I'm doing pretty well.  I didn't row yesterday because my arms were still sore from the day before, although I'll give the rower a chance again today.  My friend is coming to my place to work out with me this afternoon 🙂  I like it when she' comes up because we spend time talking and it's a nice distraction.

[Neil_1]

Scorch Scorch Scorch ...

Camera camera camera.

I forgot to tell you to pack your camera.

On trips like that you just never know what amazing things you might see - a beautiful tree or bird, or other wildlife ... could be just about anything.

No break neck speed obviously ... just go out and aim to enjoy the whole experience.

May I say that I'm damn proud of you and hubby ... really awesome stuff Scorch.

[scorch]

Neil, I didn't pack the camera.... We ended up finding and fixing my old bike and I rode along with hubby.  The track was pretty lovely, we were riding past nice paddocks and took bridges over a couple of little streambeds.  There are lots of native birds where we live, so it was great to see parrots flying by.

It was a nice ride, but my knees packed in it pretty quickly.  We rode down the trail for just under 4km then turned around and rode back.  It was downhill on the way there, and all uphill the way back!!!  ARGH!!!  I had to get off and walk the bike a few times on the way back, but it was a start.

I'm going to try it again, same distance, but this time no getting off the bike.

Although, maybe I won't do it again too soon. lol. I've got bruises Neil!  Bruises! Why do they make bike seats so hard?

[scorch]

Weigh in update:  I lost another kilo 😄  Only 2 more to go before I reach my first goal... and get my 20 minute massage as reward :D:D:D

[geoff]

dear Scorch, well I too am very proud for you, and I know to lose some weight only motivates you to lose some more.

I used to be the biggest kid at primary school until one day in the school holidays I decided to lose some weight which I did, but the enjoyment of going back to school as a new person shocked everyone, so as they say, 'Go Girl', Go. L Geoff. x

[scorch]

thanks Geoff 🙂  It's hard to stay motivated, so seeing some results helps to keep me going.

I like your story about shocking everyone at school with your weight loss 🙂  That's awesome!  I bet it was satisfying.