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Just_Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 703

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

Kazzl Helpful books and resources
  • replies: 103

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, sp... View more

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, specialist websites or blogs, podcasts, vodcasts or print or online journals or magazines. Please note BB has a list of websites and resources under Get Help, so maybe check there first for online resources. (Also note that we cannot include live links to online resources.) To make things easy to find, please put the category of the content first in bold, then the title of the book and then, if you want, a brief comment. Please note that anything listed here reflects the member's views only. Publications and other resources are not necessarily endorsed by beyondblue. Happy reading!

Chris_B Worried about other users - how are we all doing?
  • replies: 43

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences... View more

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences of others can be validating, because we feel 'we've been there', but sometimes it can also be a trigger for bringing up unpleasant feelings. I've started this thread so we can have a constructive discussion about helping others and helping ourselves - how do you cope when you read about others in distress? Do you have a self-care plan in place, and if so, what is it? Really looking forward to hearing from you all.

All discussions

Petal22 Finding your inner calm
  • replies: 37

Hi Everyone, This thread is about finding your inner calm, its something I've worked on for the past four and a half years. "One of the best lessons in life is how to master how to remain calm" Mastering how to remain calm takes inner work but once y... View more

Hi Everyone, This thread is about finding your inner calm, its something I've worked on for the past four and a half years. "One of the best lessons in life is how to master how to remain calm" Mastering how to remain calm takes inner work but once you can master it your inner would becomes very peaceful. Its something that needs to be tackled internally, sometimes we 'react' to certain things instead of responding. We all have the choice of how we will respond to something it just takes practice. If something is going to cause you to lash out and react in a negative way, before you do this you need ask yourself is it really worth it? If you can just remain calm in this instance your inner world will thank you for it, our minds tend to race forward with reactions but if you can just allow the mind to do this and "watch it" but let your body and internal self to stay deep seated in "watching" and not responding you will see how your inner calm can start to take place. We all have a inner breath, learn to follow this breath and use it as an anchor and a grounding tool. If we can learn to control our breathing everything becomes more calmer and we have more clarity in the moment. Everything takes practice but if this is something that will eventually bring you more inner peace then its practice well spent.. life is a journey and if we can learn how to master how to remain calm in every situation we win. Practice and perseverance will always get you over the line.

CMF Honesty vs Transparency
  • replies: 1

Hi all Honesty & transparency. Same, same...but different. In my opinion honesty is not telling a lie but transparency is not holding back info. Holding back info is not really lying but it can cause issues. Can you see the difference. Example. My pa... View more

Hi all Honesty & transparency. Same, same...but different. In my opinion honesty is not telling a lie but transparency is not holding back info. Holding back info is not really lying but it can cause issues. Can you see the difference. Example. My partner & his family wanted us to all see a movie. He said plans were for all of us but the time didn't suit me. They ended up going...without me. No discussion, they just changed the plan. There was honesty about going to the movie. I knew they were going without me, but there was not transparency. They had plans a while back to see it together which probably didn't include me as my partner assumed I wouldn't like. He really wanted to see it with his family but tried to include me & it backfired. He was honest about seeing the movie but not transparent in what the really wanted to do. Including me, then excluding me without explanation was hurtful for me. What are your thoughts? Do you see the difference with honesty vs transparency? Cmf

white knight What a wonderful world
  • replies: 11

One of my favourite songs but the term is so much more. A 19yo relative came to stay recently. His parents are sadly negative about everything in life. So my wife and I returned to our car where he waiting. Puffing I remarked that I wasn't fit (I'm 6... View more

One of my favourite songs but the term is so much more. A 19yo relative came to stay recently. His parents are sadly negative about everything in life. So my wife and I returned to our car where he waiting. Puffing I remarked that I wasn't fit (I'm 66yo), he replied "every part of my body is bad except my lungs...oh, but I do have asthma ". A few seconds of silence "look at that magpie standing in that tree" I said "And my tinea hasn't improved either" he continued "Watch those 2 pups playing, aren't they gorgeous " I said "Are you trying to ignore me" K barked. "Well, I do exercise choice, whereby I don't allow people talking about problems when there is so much to observe in life that is wonderful. So, you have that choice K... if you focus on your tinea so much your head will be down while the colours of a rainbow is missed. If you remind yourself of your asthma too often you'll missed the thrill of breathing air. K mumbled something. I finished my "speech" and googled that song. K realised my intent and joked "ok I get it Tony"... lol. Of course he didn't "get it" but one day he might. I hope I planted a seed he'll one day reap. People that think negative imo waste their lives. Sure we either mental health issues have down periods but that robs us of choice. When we are OK we can choose to focus on the wonders of a wonderful world... TonyWK

Butterfly7 Coping with bed rest and maintaining my mental health from covid complications
  • replies: 2

Hi, I am looking for some ways to help manage or cope, or things to do to maintain my mental health when I am on bed rest after covid complication I have had depression in past, but have been doing well in my recovery so far. But 7 weeks ago I caught... View more

Hi, I am looking for some ways to help manage or cope, or things to do to maintain my mental health when I am on bed rest after covid complication I have had depression in past, but have been doing well in my recovery so far. But 7 weeks ago I caught covid, which led to multiple hospitals for a heart complication caused by covid infection. I’m triple jabbed and never thought I would get this sick, I take all precautions, so it’s been a grieving process. I’m on bed rest until my heart heals which I have been told is weeks too months, and am struggling with the frustration of not being able to do the things I need to do to stay well, and heartbroken not to be contributing to my family in the way I normally would. I am really limited in the amount of movement I can do at the moment, and have to watch my heart rate and blood pressure, but any suggestions of things I can do to maintain my wellbeing would be really appreciated. Do you have any ideas?

white knight Prevention of stress is better than cure
  • replies: 8

"Stress" and vast word that covers several descriptions of worry, load on the mind and the number of things in life to do. In our daily life we carry out hundreds of tasks from making our bed to turning off the light before sleeping. Many of these ta... View more

"Stress" and vast word that covers several descriptions of worry, load on the mind and the number of things in life to do. In our daily life we carry out hundreds of tasks from making our bed to turning off the light before sleeping. Many of these tasks are mundane however when we fall ill with a mental health issue these same insignificant tasks become hurdles, the hurdles then become a challenge and soon they all gather to become too high to leap over. We then plug away year after year to just manage this state of mind until sadly it all ends with a serious mental breakdown. It is only having gone through that process that I can see clearly that period of many years when the warning signs were ignored. The "fast lane" of juggling work in my case 80,000km a year driving, medication, relationship woes and childrens needs etc. Two psychotic episodes in quick succession was the end of my working life. That was 9 years ago. So what can you do about the build up of stress during that period where you are just maintaining tolerance of life itself? Acceptance- learn to accept that life will not be smooth, it will throw waves of unexpected barrier at any time. Accepting this results in less panic Realise that from the cave man days or even more recently, that life used to have far less activity. Hunt, cook, eat, maintain shelter and care for each other. Since then we've cluttered it all up. This means our mind is full and needs rest and de-cluttering. Leads to- Going back to basics. Remove things that you dont need. Toxic people, clubs and community obligations, reduce addictions and streamline bill paying etc Increase happy things, hobbies, sports etc. Barrack for a team? I made one mistake recently y joining a fotty team on facebook. You simply cant post a comment without controversy- nope, left that group. Leads me to- Learn to care for yourself. Everything that works in life needs care. Service your body and mind with rest and meditation. Start by googling "youtube prem rawat Maharaji". His videos are amazing Help others. You experience in life and your endurance to survive a mental health issue is invaluable. Helping others makes you feel valued. Learn positivity and motivation. Attend lectures. Our minds are open to learning better ways to thrive. Worry only produces ulcers. https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/worry-worry-worry Praise yourself. You can be your own best friend Comments welcome TonyWK

Checkthebatteries I feel like just an empty shell
  • replies: 3

I have two public health and a physiology degrees so I know my covid stuff. I live alone. I have depression and anxiety. I am close to my parents, who are fit and healthy but are in their seventies and my mum has a respiratory illness. They are also ... View more

I have two public health and a physiology degrees so I know my covid stuff. I live alone. I have depression and anxiety. I am close to my parents, who are fit and healthy but are in their seventies and my mum has a respiratory illness. They are also my only family. Exercise is a huge part of my life and I am also wary of the effect of long covid on it. I lived in WA so it was great for a few years. Then at ANZAC day all restrictions were dropped and cases have skyrocketed. I no longer go to the shops, go to the gym, go to painting lessons, go to parties, go shopping, go to the movies or concerts, go on air travel, go to sports training sessions, eat out etc. I miss my friends and wonder if I will ever get to do the things I love again. I really just have this existence all by myself and I feel I have lost my identity. I have a very boring job that I do party from home. Despite all that, one of my parents now has covid and other is likely to follow. I am bracing for them to go into hospital at least in the next few weeks, I also probably have it. I feel I'm now a prisoner wasting my life and worried sick about my loved ones while being powerless to help them and am isolated from society, without being able to do any of the things you can do for mental health. I have tried walking and running on my own but I am now bored of it and it doesn't fulfill me. I feel this will go on forever.

Ggrand Nature is both beautiful and healing...🌲🌸🦋
  • replies: 64

Hello Everyone.... I love nature and I find it very helpful in helping me in healing way..when I’m not in a good head space...I was wondering if others feel the same and am hoping that you might share your piece of nature, whether it’s a small patch ... View more

Hello Everyone.... I love nature and I find it very helpful in helping me in healing way..when I’m not in a good head space...I was wondering if others feel the same and am hoping that you might share your piece of nature, whether it’s a small patch of grass in your back yard..somewhere that you drive to, to just relax, somewhere close to you that you walk amongst...and if you have really taken the time to listen, watch, feel, smell, the wonders all around us.. I love nature..the trees, flowers, creatures both big and small, it’s my solitude place, a place I go to when things are getting to hard for me.. I am lucky, I have this huge gumtree which I found out about recently... It was planted around 70 years ago by a local here when she was a little girl, and living in the house I’m now living in...About 5 years after she planted it, a strong wind with rain blew it down....A few of the locals saw her trying to stand it up to replant it...and they came to help her...and successfully managed to replant it....Today it’s easily over 60feet tall and just as wide, the trunk of the tree would need 4 people to hug it by joining hands.. The tree stands in front of my place and in front of the paddocks across from me..which the owner has some Angus cows, which love to lay under the tree....Birds are everywhere here, and a few use the tree as their home.. I sit outside for hours sometimes, watching the birds come and go for food and water I have supplied for them in bird feeders and bird baths....It’s a beautiful and peaceful way to relax watching and feeling what Mother Nature has provided for us... For me it’s both calming and healing... Do you have a piece of nature around you...and how does it make you feel when you take the time to just look and take in the wonder of it all.... We would love to hear about how nature helps you...and do you find that it can be healing for your soul... Kind and caring thoughts everyone.. Grandy..

blondguy Mindfulness: What Is It? (Even if you dont know please post so we can help grow the forums accordingly)
  • replies: 1330

Hi Everybody This is only the basic dictionary definition... "Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance without judging them good or bad. Instead of le... View more

Hi Everybody This is only the basic dictionary definition... "Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment without judgement" Please be as blunt you wish....If you dont have an idea about mindfulness it would be great if you could let us know If mindfulness hasnt worked/or is too broad a concept for you it would great if you can let us know your thoughts too If mindfulness has helped you, please help others to help themselves by posting how you have embraced this mindset It goes without saying that the forums are a judgement free zone and I really hope that everyone can jump in and have their say Your input is highly valued no matter how you respond to this topic. There are no experts here...New Posters are Most Welcome!! My Kindest Thoughts Paul

ScarlettR Do you find watching Youtube 4K walk videos a great way to unwind and relax at home?
  • replies: 3

As we are still in a pandemic, lockdowns and their aftermaths have worn down the best of us. Even then, sometimes we just can't leave our homes to venture into the city or local shopping centre for some reason. On Youtube, there are 4k videos - basic... View more

As we are still in a pandemic, lockdowns and their aftermaths have worn down the best of us. Even then, sometimes we just can't leave our homes to venture into the city or local shopping centre for some reason. On Youtube, there are 4k videos - basically, it's someone who's filming their POV as they walk through cities and attractions. There are hundreds of such videos on Youtube, covering many cities and places across the world. They tend to run for about 30 minutes on average, and it's a great opportunity to do people-watching and contemplating the sights. I used to live in South Australia, and I often watch 4K videos of Adelaide CBD, because it brings back so many nice memories and I feel a release of bottled-up emotions and feel I'm actually there, walking in Adelaide. It's also just interesting to watch the other people walking and any new developments in the area. Does anyone else watch 4K videos, too? I think it's great for people with mental illness who are curious about the world and can get a personal "tour" of any global city.

Is_it_Just_Me_ Staying Positive
  • replies: 7

Hi there, how are you? Can I ask for help first please........I don't know how to register a profile name. Adivice would be much appreciated. I struggle sometime with the fear of losing my peace which I find through 'connections'.........I know my tr... View more

Hi there, how are you? Can I ask for help first please........I don't know how to register a profile name. Adivice would be much appreciated. I struggle sometime with the fear of losing my peace which I find through 'connections'.........I know my triggers can be loneliness, self-pity, boredom. When this happens I feel myself slipping and this frightens me senseless because then it's a slow slide down the old rabbit hole. I could feel it happening the other day and the fear was tangible.......and I thought, you know what, you're not getting me this time. Forced myself to think about what I could do...........life had dealt some pretty heafty blows in the last few months and I'm more of a listener than a talker so I keep things to myself. Big mistake I know. I'd been giving and giving and giving which is fine. I didn't want to talk to a 'professional" as it wasn't something I couldn't work on myself. What I realised was, I needed someone to talk to as a friend, to just share the ups and downs of life and someone who could also relate to the fear of when things are going good that you're maybe wondering how long you've got being connected to life to being dis-connected and becoming that pain-filled zombie. I missed having a really good laugh about it all to be honest. So, here I am...a person without a name - lol and just connecting........don't know if anyone will answer but I'm enjoying just writing. Was trying to think of a profile name and people come up with all these really clever ones and I can't think of anything really. I don't want anything cheesy or too positive cos that turns me off a bit so I kinda came up with "Is it Just Me?" Anyway, very strange typing into something that you don't know is really real so I'll be pleasantly surprised if I get a reply. Stay safe........... "Is it Just Me?"