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Sophie_M Money stress? You are not alone!
  • replies: 4

So, I’ve been chatting with my friends over here at Beyond Blue and it seems we all have something in common right now: money worries. Whether it’s stressors about finding enough cash for the basics or wishing we had enough money for a holiday, we al... View more

So, I’ve been chatting with my friends over here at Beyond Blue and it seems we all have something in common right now: money worries. Whether it’s stressors about finding enough cash for the basics or wishing we had enough money for a holiday, we all seem to be experiencing a greater amount of stress surrounding money than we have in the past. And it’s impacting our ability to show up fully for the things we love. It’s not uncommon for us to experience shame and fear around expressing our financial challenges; it can be hard and somewhat taboo to openly discuss money matters. However, we believe this conversation is incredibly important and beneficial to have. Like all challenges, ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’, so let’s help each other out. Of course, discussions about the economy and how to manage our money during inflation are a much larger (and frustrating!) conversation… but what we would really love to know is what your personal experience around money is. Are you feeling the pinch too? How is added financial pressure impacting your wellbeing? When was the last time things felt even slightly easier? And if you have struggled with money in the past but come out the other side, what suggestions do you have for others who might still be finding their feet? This is an opportunity to share openly and honestly about your experience in a judgement-free space. There are no wrong answers, and we encourage you to share all the things that you might be finding hard to express in your every day life. Looking forward to your answers! Abundant hugs from yours truly, Sophie M.

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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white knight Xmas body weight increase
  • replies: 0

Anyone that has tried more than 15-20 diets and failed to meet their goal is full of despair and sadness. What has changed a lot in the last 15 years or so is our knowledge of genetics. DNA and the complexities are slowly being unravelled to expose t... View more

Anyone that has tried more than 15-20 diets and failed to meet their goal is full of despair and sadness. What has changed a lot in the last 15 years or so is our knowledge of genetics. DNA and the complexities are slowly being unravelled to expose the secret of why we are what we are. Everything about you will eventually be known. Including why we are overweight. Then there is the post birth reasons. Your food (both quantity and quality and how its prepared), environment, exercise etc all come into the mix that can add to over weight issues. We know that mental illness is often a life of extreme behaviour but it is also extreme with feelings, sensitivity, more need for comfort food and things like alcohol. Some people reach for a lolly when anxious....we'd reach for a packet or two. Can we blame mental illness for our appetite? Well, so many people out there would say no sadly, they'd say "just stop putting food in your mouth". Such is the same naivety with over eating as there is with mental illness itself. What I would like to promote, as a person that has always been over weight is a few observations using myself as an example- - I was clearly over weight at 18 months old. I have a photo - My mother was obese and my father had a beer belly (but didnt drink alcohol) - All members of my family (except my late brother who was diabetic 1) has tried many many diets and not succeeded. - The urgency of losing weight is clear. Failing knees, ankles and backs I'm 6ft tall. My weight peaked in 2012. It was the ultimate insult. I felt obese, I puffed, I rolled out of bed, I was unhappy. So what could I do. My wife and I (yes she is overweight) embarked on the following plan. No we didnt call it a diet. - Eat healthier. Keep carbs down eg less white food like pasta, rice and flour - when we eat out (often Chinese) cut down one dish. - Eat more fish and white meat, less red meat. (this is also as I get gout) - sugarless chocolate - whole oats for brekky -home grown vegies is also therapeutic - Worry does nothing towards reaching your goal. - a little exercise but only do what is sustainable. A quick 15 minute walk. I'm feeling more comfortable at my current weight. And this has been going for 2 years and is indeed sustainable. We dont ignore our cravings but we limit them. Achievable goals is best. Accept you for being you and that includes your size. As long as you do your best to eat sensibly, exercise and stop worrying. Your thoughts? TonyWK

Dn10000 My wife and daughter are into horses
  • replies: 3

As above, I have been married for the last 16+ years and my wife and one of my twin daughters are into horses. My wife was into them when we first met but sold her horse when we hooked up and after we built a new house and had twin daughters and they... View more

As above, I have been married for the last 16+ years and my wife and one of my twin daughters are into horses. My wife was into them when we first met but sold her horse when we hooked up and after we built a new house and had twin daughters and they grew up to around 10-12 years old the horses came back on the seen. Only one of the daughters is into horses (thank you) and the other is starting to get other interests. Just after we had our girls my wife wanted to move house so we built a new house at a lot of expense and moved in with all going well. Since then the horse world has taken over and one daughter is involved. The wife now does not seem to be interested in anything not involved with horses, and one daughter as well. The wife now works at the horse place and has also had issues with the people she works there with. Myself and the other daughter who are not into the horse life seem to be just supporting them as we don’t have any direct interest in what they are doing. My wife now wants a new car to tow a horse float when we purchased a new 60,000 dollar car for her which she has no thought of taking care of or looking after. i used to go away a lot on holidays and now can’t do so as the wife and one daughter have to feed horses twice a day and thus we cannot go anywhere directly without organising people to look after/ feed the horses. I have a full time job and are at the stage in my life that being 58 years old are trying to work out where my life is going heading towards retirement. My wife would love me to buy a property so she and other daughter can have horses and do what they want to do. I on the other hand are looking at what I will do when retirement comes up and don’t want to outlay major money to go into debt for a property that I don’t want nor the debt that goes with it. i am at a loss with what to do with my life at the moment and have great doubt about where it’s future is going let alone my daughter that is not into horses which I am worried about as through COVID she has had major issues with handling the lock downs etc to the point that we have had her get counselling to try and help things through. I am at a point in my life that I feel I am of little use to the family and only seem to be a financial asset for them without thinking of my own requirements and also my daughter that has no real interest in horses.

Positive_vibes89 I am a nurse and the struggle is real! - Covid 19 ......lets talk about how we are feeling.
  • replies: 14

Hello, I am a frontline nurse. My job is to stand at the drive through testing site for long hours wearing a mask, faceshield, gloves and protective gown. Currently at the moment im seeing so much panic in people, I know this because they line up at ... View more

Hello, I am a frontline nurse. My job is to stand at the drive through testing site for long hours wearing a mask, faceshield, gloves and protective gown. Currently at the moment im seeing so much panic in people, I know this because they line up at the testsites at 4am and have just started camping out in the carparks. In my state other test sites have closed down due to a whole backlog of tests. But my site still remains open. I give up my personal health and my families to test you. Yes a stranger that I shall never see or meet again. I will get covid-19, it is in evitable because im putting my health on the line to provide you with health care. Yes I get paid for this, but nursing is just not a job for me it is about caring for the sick and vulnerable. I do however get angry when people come to get tested and they dont wear a mask! It is selfish, why are they even coming to get tested when they are being so careless? I hand them a mask and tell them you are here because you think you have covid, you should be wearing a mask to protect me who is testing you and others in the community. I wish I could have denied this person a test for their stupid behaviour (they had no exemption either), but as a nurse I cannot deny health care based on a person's silly behaviour. As a nurse you have to have a thick skin! some try and take advantage of getting tested they will decided because the person in their car is getting tested they will too! Ive told them to drive back around and wait in the line again. As I have no time to fill oput paper work on the spot for them when there are hundreds of other waiting in cars behind them and to try getting them a test pack. Its brutal out there with the way some people are behaving and this is the internal stuggle I am having. I have had to turn away family from visiting their loved ones at hospital, I put myself in their shoes and can feel my heart sink when only one parent can see their child, or a wife cant accompany her husband for chemotherapy. The stuggle is real! keep going everyone we will get there. It might be a long time before we do, but we got this okay.

The_Bro NEW YEARS RESOLUTION - THIS HINT MAY HELP!
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone Just a brief note. I have always struggled big time remembering my New Years Resolution each year, let alone actually sticking to it! I read this hint this morning and thought 'Ah Ha!", that makes a lot of sense. It may just help you too!... View more

Hi Everyone Just a brief note. I have always struggled big time remembering my New Years Resolution each year, let alone actually sticking to it! I read this hint this morning and thought 'Ah Ha!", that makes a lot of sense. It may just help you too! NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS - 'It takes seven days to create a new habit, another seven days to make it a behaviour, then another seven days to create a positive neurological pathway'. 21 days or three weeks in total! I'm going to give it a go. The Bro.

Guest_1055 Name 1 thing you are Looking Forward to this week
  • replies: 13

Hi Came across this idea from someone else a moment ago. And thought YES this a good one. I am not sure of the personal outcome for each of us. And sometimes it can be a challenge to look forward to something that is coming up in our lives. Currently... View more

Hi Came across this idea from someone else a moment ago. And thought YES this a good one. I am not sure of the personal outcome for each of us. And sometimes it can be a challenge to look forward to something that is coming up in our lives. Currently I can think of one thing. So I will share it in my next post. What is 1 thing you are Looking Forward to this week in your life?

blondguy Happy 2022! Who would YOU like to thank?
  • replies: 12

Hi Everyone! Just a note of thanks to all the amazing Members on this National platform Its important to acknowledge the contribution that you provide on the forums. This can be a difficult and sometimes emotional time of the year for many that are e... View more

Hi Everyone! Just a note of thanks to all the amazing Members on this National platform Its important to acknowledge the contribution that you provide on the forums. This can be a difficult and sometimes emotional time of the year for many that are experiencing any level of difficulty in their lives....(that includes myself too) Thankyou to all the members that have summoned the courage to post/or continue to contribute on the forums If you wish to thank anyone on the forums you are very welcome to do so! my kindest always Paul

Frangepani Menopause
  • replies: 3

Hi Everyone hope all is well. Im reaching out because im very interested to know how women cope with severe menopause symptoms I extremely struggling and I literally can not go outside in this extreme heat because it makes me very unwell I also belie... View more

Hi Everyone hope all is well. Im reaching out because im very interested to know how women cope with severe menopause symptoms I extremely struggling and I literally can not go outside in this extreme heat because it makes me very unwell I also believe I am prone to heatstroke. I look forward to hearing your feedback thankyou.

Maisie8yo Health anxiety - neurological symptoms
  • replies: 4

Hi, I am new to this forum, but wanted to see if anyone else was experiencing similar neurological symptoms as me. I have health anxiety, probably from my mum who had lots of mental health issues. 2021 has been a nightmare for me as I was diagnosed w... View more

Hi, I am new to this forum, but wanted to see if anyone else was experiencing similar neurological symptoms as me. I have health anxiety, probably from my mum who had lots of mental health issues. 2021 has been a nightmare for me as I was diagnosed with a scary unusual problem associated with cardiovascular disease - I have a ‘penetrating arteriosclerotic ulcer’ in my aorta which causes a weakness that can eventually dissect. If this happens, it is very serious and often fatal. I am being monitored by a cardiologist and vascular surgeon who think it can be managed without surgery at the moment. I found it really hard to adjust having been fit and independent. While in hospital the last time, I started getting pins and needles in my hands, arms, legs and feet. This has become really uncomfortable painful, ongoing prickling, tingling burning sensations in hands, legs, ankles and feet. I have also had some vision changes. I have had an MRI of my head and full spine, blood tests, seen an ophthalmologist, had a stroke ruled out with CT scan and had physiotherapy. The spinal scan revealed deterioration but a neurosurgeon felt that was no, if very minimal nerve involvement. All tests have come back clear, and I have done a systematic withdrawal from medication that has side effects that, may cause these symptoms. When I have these neurological sensations really badly, I struggle to cope. I can’t do things that give me pleasure, e.g. sitting reading a book, playing the piano, relaxing with friends, cooking, because these all exacerbate the symptoms. The sensations are so uncomfortable and there every second of the day. It is really hard to concentrate or do anything being so all-consumed with pain and discomfort and I get very depressed. No painkillers are effective in relieving this. I am so tired of feeling ill and spending my life careening from one doctor to the other without anyone giving me an answer. My GP doubled my dose of anti-anxiety medication but it has made no difference whatsoever. I am literally at my wits end, so my question is, does anyone else out there get these same symptoms, can something this severe and ongoing be due to anxiety and what can I do to start managing this before I literally go mad? Even knowing that someone else out there is going through the same thing would be comforting as I feel very alone with this at the moment. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, it is so helpful to just now be part of this forum.

white knight 30 minutes can change your life
  • replies: 11

I think there is a good percentage of members here that overall need stimulation, perhaps you are a negative thinker? From a negative family? I was a negative guy until I hit 23yo. Then an event occured where it changed my life forever- it was a moti... View more

I think there is a good percentage of members here that overall need stimulation, perhaps you are a negative thinker? From a negative family? I was a negative guy until I hit 23yo. Then an event occured where it changed my life forever- it was a motivation lecture. This might interest you. I'll try to be brief. I sold insurance for a short time. I was doing ok. I went to this lecture as part of my training. The guy talking was "Bill" and he opened up telling us how, at 42yo he started selling insurance. But after 6 months not one policy was sold. With the stress he had a heart attack and lying in hospital his wife came for a visit and asked Bill what he wanted to do when he was discharged from hospital. "I'm going to be a millionaire selling insurance" Bill blurted. His wife laughed at him and it was that laugh that sealed Bill's future. For he no longer cared for anything else. His wife seemed to ridicule him with "that laugh". Bill started to put plans in place. For motivation he decided to stop his car at 11am everyday where ever he was, and knock on every door of that street until he finished every house. If the street was really long he would return the next day and continue. He started selling a few small policies. Then one day he was in the centre of Melbourne and looked at his clock and saw it was 11am. He was in a major street in the heart of the city. But...good to his promise he started knocking on doors, every door of every tall building. Two weeks later he is still knocking. He arrived at a building owned by a major mining company. He made an appointment and the guy said "bring along a superannuation expert with you". The next day he was riding the elevator up to that office and the expert told him "introduce me Bill then keep quiet...leave it to me" Well Bill actually fell asleep during the discussions. Then forms were signed. On the way down the elevator the expert asked Bill "do you know what just happened"? "No" said Bill. "We just sold Australia's biggest mining company an extra 1.5% superannuation for their 60,000 employees" said the expert. "That means I get nothing because I'm on a wage, but your commission is just over one million dollars". Bill returned home, put his slippers on and relaxed. His wife came home and asked "how did you go Bill"? "I made one million dollars today....AND DONT EVER LAUGH AT ME LIKE THAT AGAIN !!!!! By this time he was yelling at us. Never ever give up...! Try motivation. Tony WK

tranzcrybe I belong... here?
  • replies: 4

Wouldn't you agree that our brains are just some sort of hoarder - years of gathering info on how to act, think, behave (why do knives always go to the right of the dinner plate??); what 'makes' our lives complete; what 'defines' us; how our job/poss... View more

Wouldn't you agree that our brains are just some sort of hoarder - years of gathering info on how to act, think, behave (why do knives always go to the right of the dinner plate??); what 'makes' our lives complete; what 'defines' us; how our job/possessions represent achievement; friends vs enemies vs frenemies!; and classifying ourselves by what we do and not who we are in essence (as opposed to how we wish to be portrayed)? We seem to live a life of comparison to some unrealistic ideal lodged firmly in our heads from our very first breath - emulating and measuring expectations (and biases) of parents, peers, social circles, and anything that we fear may pass judgement on the 'correctness' of our presence. Even those who buck the system are merely creating a predictable stereotype to the same end. My advice: LET IT GO! We belong for no other reason than that we are here. If not so, then it would not be so. In most cases the issue can be looking too much back at ourselves - critically running events through this rather clogged filter of behavioural appropriateness to soothe/satisfy the conniptions of others (who are no doubt doing exactly the same thing). We are only ever this moment in time and the one constant is change - erosion, degradation, subsidence, climate, evolution, and the very cells in our bodies - we live in a state of flux on a planet in perpetual motion. The one assurance being that everything that is, although undergoing several transformations (and abominations), is as it should be, and accepting our association to this natural order can help us to understand it is not really our business to meddle, control, or take ownership of what is provided - so far, despite patting ourselves firmly on the back with our inventions, interventions, and aspirations, we have made quite a hash of it on the whole. Mindfulness may be more about releasing ourselves from our thoughts - the ability to let things pass through instead of taking up residence only to veil reality or find ulterior motives. Has no one observed how absurd the construct of life is? Surely you have felt it every day as you strive to find inner peace and synergy within existence and your place in it. What thoughts/beliefs have you held so long and so dear that you can't even remember why? What can you dispose of in your mind that is just taking up valuable space, diminishing awareness, and bogging you down?