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BeyondBlue Tradies National Health Month
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, August is Tradies National Health Month, to highlight the importance of health and safety among Australia’s trade workers. Mental health and wellbeing is crucial to the safety of anyone in the mining or construction industries, so Beyond... View more

Hi everyone, August is Tradies National Health Month, to highlight the importance of health and safety among Australia’s trade workers. Mental health and wellbeing is crucial to the safety of anyone in the mining or construction industries, so Beyond Blue is hosting a special free webinar for our tradie community on Tuesday 12 August at 4.30pm which you can register for here. We know that Tradies can face unique stressors, with a culture of toughness and difficult job demands that can impact personal time and self-care. It can also be tough for partners and family members who aren’t sure how to support someone in a trade who may be showing signs that their mental health isn’t at its best. If you’re unsure where to start your conversation this is the space for you. Whether you want to share your own experiences, ask questions, or simply connect with others who understand what you're going through, you're in the right place. If you're seeking additional support, here are some resources: Hope Assistance Local Tradies: Home This Is A Conversation Starter: TIACS - This is a Conversation Starter Mates in Construction: MATES - Industry Based Suicide Prevention - MATES Don’t forget - our counsellors are always here for you on 1300 22 46 36. We’ll also use this space to post some of the questions and answers from the webinar discussion. Feel free to dive in and keep the conversation going. Thank you again for joining us — we’re glad you’re here.

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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HA1 Don't look back
  • replies: 31

Hi everyone! Six months ago, soon after a after a career crisis, my wife convinced me to go to the GP - she knew all was not well. I did also, but was more focused on my need to go away that day to be alone and think things through. However, we went ... View more

Hi everyone! Six months ago, soon after a after a career crisis, my wife convinced me to go to the GP - she knew all was not well. I did also, but was more focused on my need to go away that day to be alone and think things through. However, we went to the GP and I ended up in hospital for the next four nights. In hindsight, possibly the best decision I/we have made. Also my previously unspoken feelings of sadness were now out in the open. Maybe my loved ones now better understood the cause of everything they had put up with over a long period of time - I hope so. I have always been a loner – perhaps partially due to being target of bullying as a young boy. Withdrawing socially equated to self-preservation. As an adult, I remained that way with few friends of my own, and certainly none that I could talk to about how I was feeling, let alone meeting for a coffee and sharing a joke. While people around me saw me as the ‘strong and silent type’, it was far from the truth. Appearing strong, calm and collected was (I think now) a self-defence mechanism. I did not want anyone to get too close to me – always on my guard, never trusting people, always looking for anonymity. In more recent years I also started to self-medicate with alcohol. These days, every day is pretty much the same as the previous - lack of motivation and fatigue. Often I still need to be alone with my thoughts and going for long walks on the beach – sitting on a rock and contemplating what the future holds. Recovery is one step forward and two steps back. I had a couple of reasonably good weeks, but then ‘it’ started creeping in again. All the symptoms of a relapse were there. My medication has now been progressively increased to a point where, it is at its max. On the whole, I am OK for now. I stopped drinking alcohol (6 months cold turkey) so that will help the meds to work better. My plan is to not look back, but to instead focus on the future. I am resigned to my fate of living with this illness probably for the rest of my life. Having resigned myself to that fate, makes life somewhat easier, but not necessarily any happier. Happiness will come with time and patience. Later this week I will be off on a holiday for two weeks - an opportunity to chill out and learn a little bit more about my illness, the practice of Mindfulness, and reading the book Silence of the Mind. Take care everyone, K

Liam007 Why you should never hide your emotions
  • replies: 3

So I finally managed to think something to post here! I'm finding that whilst I'm incredibly anxious and having a tough time with negative thoughts. I'm finding that writing about it and talking online really really works. I find that I believe and r... View more

So I finally managed to think something to post here! I'm finding that whilst I'm incredibly anxious and having a tough time with negative thoughts. I'm finding that writing about it and talking online really really works. I find that I believe and recommend that staying silent about it is the worst thing you can possibly do. I tried hide it for ages, but found it just got worse and worse as time goes on. Hiding it is something you should never do, it can't be fixed because no one knows you feel that way! When I finally starting writing online and talking to people about it, once I got it out there I felt better. Whilst I'm not completely fixed (yet) , I feel like by writing about it and talking has got me on the right path With that said, thanks to everyone who is reading, posting and all around just actively using this forum. You are all amazing people. Thanks

white knight 3 things. Happy marriage, hobbies and spirit.
  • replies: 1

1/ What on a daily basis has helped me recover my life to a point of being able to manage it well? I'm talking daily rituals, habits, lifestyle? Marriage. Or defacto or close friendships. Contentment is so important to you daily well being. In some c... View more

1/ What on a daily basis has helped me recover my life to a point of being able to manage it well? I'm talking daily rituals, habits, lifestyle? Marriage. Or defacto or close friendships. Contentment is so important to you daily well being. In some cases a bad or toxic relationship can keep you down continually. I often wonder how many people attend psychiatrist appointments, therapy, have crisis etc all because they dont have a close marriage in the first place. Chasing all over for answers and the answer is separation???? I'm lucky...or rather, I worked toward my luck. I set goals years ago after a failed abusive marriage, to find my soul mate, someone that would make the effort to understand me- equalled to my own effort. 2/ Hobbies. To have a passion takes you to a place of peace. I enter my shed to begin my daily tinkering, place the music from the 1970's on and I'm in my dream place, my man cave. My wife has her sewing room and she loves being there. Passions make progress. 3/ Spiritual peace. You can have your own peace through your own beliefs. This peace, whatever it might be for you can give you a place where your mind is at rest. For me 27 years ago, I found my spiritual home to follow the words of Maharaji. I'm not religious but Maharaji takes me to so many level of peace, I find I'm in my own world with a smile. Topics he has on Youtube include- Sunset, the perfect instrument, the journey of life, the source of joy, fullfillment, the infinite within, the rythym of clarity, Enjoy

white knight SUCCESS!! 53 years of hell now 5 years of contentment
  • replies: 3

Capital letters for success. So I can tell the world that managing mental illness successfully is possible.Raised in outer Melbourne suburbs my first problem was that I was a country kid living in the city. We'd spend 6 weeks around xmas in Tasmania ... View more

Capital letters for success. So I can tell the world that managing mental illness successfully is possible.Raised in outer Melbourne suburbs my first problem was that I was a country kid living in the city. We'd spend 6 weeks around xmas in Tasmania on a dairy farm and it was ace. Only to return to a city I hated. I had an incident when I was 12yo that changed my life. My brother near drowned in our backyard pool.I stopped talking for 3 months. Not one word.Then at 17yo I joined the RAAF and at 18yo the wheels fell off DUI, lost my license, drunk all the time. I lasted 3 years there.I worked at Pentridge Gaol, the youngest prison officer in the jails history.I thought I was a full man when I joined, soon to realise I had a way to go. My brother took his own life and I knew I couldnt return to that dungeon. I had as many jobs as cars them days. Bought and sold on impulse not realising at all that this was immature not to mention financially silly.First marriage lasted 11 years, two daughters.Her silence ended that bond.If ever one person could hurt a talkative man like me its to ignore him completely...for up to 6 weeks at a time. I was a wreck and I started writing my poetry. It turned into my therapy. 2003 at 47yo and I attended a psychiatrist who diagnosed bp 1 and ADHD. I was then running my own business as an investigator. I travelled around 500 kms a day. That medication made me run off the roads so often. I tried walking around the car, drinking sugary soft drinks you name it. 2009 and another psych diagnosed me with bp 1, dysthymia, depression and anxiety.I had some ADHD when younger but he said it was mostly mania. add the correct meds this time and I didnt realise at the time my life would change for the better 10 fold.What was interesting was my new psych's assessment of the near drowning incident when I was 12yo. This, he said sparked off the dysthymia, a type of depression. Even though I made such progress I still had two emotional episodes early and mid 2013.I could no longer work at all and wound my business up. We are now on the pension.Such a change took a huge relief off my shoulders and by April 2014 I was ready to fill in some of my day helping others here on this site. Some of the changes since 2009 include- move to a small country town, got a hobby, no more toxic people (including my mother sadly as she likely has BPD in the extreme), good financial plans etc Success is being able to manage your illnesses. You have to believe it's possible.

dalecoach Dealing with Day to day life
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I am new to the website and wanted to share my story because it is easy to talk about it when I am typing on a screen while face to face conversations about this are still very difficult.I have been a sufferer of depression and anxiety for a ... View more

Hi all, I am new to the website and wanted to share my story because it is easy to talk about it when I am typing on a screen while face to face conversations about this are still very difficult.I have been a sufferer of depression and anxiety for a number of years now and last year I had 15 ECT procedures. The disappointing thing to come from that is I have lost some significant memories like my wedding which upsets me greatly. As a male who grew up in a family that believed all males must be strong and never be seen to fail. As a husband I feel like I have failed because of this illness. It is frustrating because unlike a broken bone you don't know when this will end. I have been lucky that the friends I have are very supportive and one in particular gave me an opportunity to work in his company by making me a role. I am now general Manager which I am proud of. The days still come by where the dark clouds hover above me and I still struggle to deal with them and certain situations. I am someone who is prepared to listen and help anyone out that I can to ensure they don't suffer like I did. No one deserves to go through what I have been through and if I can help one person then I have achieved. Dealing with day to day life is a constant battle and I would love to hear other peoples success stories on staying strong and fighting this thing head on. Thanks for listening. Dale

Liam007 I finally started enjoying one of my old hobbies again!
  • replies: 3

So I used to love sculpting figures out of clay, I made stuff like the shark from Jaws and the Winter Soldier from Captain America. I had someone vandalized one of them which left me sad and embarrassed and for a long time I refused to do it. But aft... View more

So I used to love sculpting figures out of clay, I made stuff like the shark from Jaws and the Winter Soldier from Captain America. I had someone vandalized one of them which left me sad and embarrassed and for a long time I refused to do it. But after the heartbreak with my community play turning out awful I finally decided to give it a shot...and I actually built and completed a model! I'm seriously happy! Whilst I'm not feeling entirely better and still have a long way to go I'm so glad that I finally managed to do it! That's one thing down but quite a lot to go. But still a victory! Thanks for reading!

WarriorGirl90 Today Was a Good Day
  • replies: 6

When I was 15, my best friend ended her own life. I did everything I could to keep her here, I arrived too late and that sits with me every day. Although part of me knows that it is not my fault, I still shoulder the blame every day that I should hav... View more

When I was 15, my best friend ended her own life. I did everything I could to keep her here, I arrived too late and that sits with me every day. Although part of me knows that it is not my fault, I still shoulder the blame every day that I should have done more. I relive the moment in my head each night when I fall asleep. Some nights I even save her but then I wake up and she is gone again. Sometimes I forget her face, so I see my own face. It haunts me like it were yesterday, but as of November 3, it will be 9 years.I am not a suicide risk, but I do suffer from depression. I find that crazy because I have done a lot in my life which I tie to living out what my friend and I always spoke about. I regularly travel the world, I always have a well paying job, I have friends that would do anything for me but I am never happy. I feel like every smile is forced, every conversation is exhausting, when people ask me to do things I get annoyed and agitated. I have this person in my head screaming at me because I don't feel like I deserve to be happy. I am always angry, even when I have nothing to be angry about. I am alive and she gave up, and that sits with me all day, every day.A year ago my three year relationship ended. It hurt don't get me wrong, but I constantly found myself questioning my feelings and if what I felt was even love. Some days I would look at my partner and I felt nothing, I would spend days numb to any positive emotion. My depression comes in tidal waves, it fills me with dread, doubt, paranoia and self loathing. It crashes into my life and often destroys the relationships I have built up around me. I feel like I sabotage myself, and I set myself up to fail. It feels like I am caught in a rip, and no matter what I do, I can't get back to land. I have been particularly bad of late, I feel like I am going a little insane. I have avoided all social events, even those with my closest friends. I rarely leave my room, I just sit there content with not moving. Yesterday I told someone about how I feel and today I feel better for it. I might not have gone into detail, but I said enough. I haven't been hit by a wave today, I think I even smiled. . Sometimes the smallest of conversations can make the biggest difference. Today was a good day

white knight Why I cried today
  • replies: 3

It's been a week or more since the build up began. I could feel it coming. That welling in my eyes as if Niagra Falls was on the brink but it wasnt coming until this morning. Compassion. It's a strong word. It is, in my world at least, essential to m... View more

It's been a week or more since the build up began. I could feel it coming. That welling in my eyes as if Niagra Falls was on the brink but it wasnt coming until this morning. Compassion. It's a strong word. It is, in my world at least, essential to my character. I'm not boasting, I'm relating. To you, yes you that is reading this. I've been on this forum for 6 months and I, for once feel safe. A place we can share and be compassionate understanding and grateful. This place is so valuable money cannot buy its replacement. There is no room for criticism of this place. If it comes it is due to the very few that have their own issues with coping that cannot read our stories of pain. So they need help from elsewhere. Recently we had a regular dear member that lost his close mum and then there is all the funeral arrangements that would drain and test any of us. There has been some brave new posts one of which comes to my mind "think b4 you act"....how amazing as he faces his umpteenth operation to repair damage to his body. There are long term posters struggling to keep their heads above water even after more than 500 posts but they hang in there asking, learning and then, the most important thing....putting advice into action. And there are the young posters lately that have taken my breath away with their honesty and maturity beyond their years. Some as young as 15yo that are not even adults. Well done. I salute those here that give advice to others, yet if we all knew their own life's history we would be astounded how they have come to a point whereby they can give help to others. Simply amazing. This forum is about more than support . It's about sharing between equals. Equals? Yes, we are all equals. A seemingly small issue for one person can be near the end of their world. So we cannot judge what is major and what is not. For that person with the 'small' issue could very well manifest into a life struggle. Or they could turn into a great adviser here. Each of us is valued. Each of us is a link in a recovery chain. More than support, this site is growth by learning, strength by reaching out and a service by listening. So I figured out why I cried this morning. It wasnt a long cry but a short one. I cried because I'm happy. I have a home here.

Muttley Knocking down the brick wall
  • replies: 2

I am after some advice. I have built a brick wall around myself in regards to my anxiety an depression. I realise I need help and am seeing a psychologist as well as being on medication. I have only just started to see the psychologist and I am scare... View more

I am after some advice. I have built a brick wall around myself in regards to my anxiety an depression. I realise I need help and am seeing a psychologist as well as being on medication. I have only just started to see the psychologist and I am scared that he won't want to help me if I keep the brick wall up. I was abused as a child (sexually and verbally) and built the wall to protect myself. How can I take the wall down so that the real me will shine and I can get my self esteem back? Thanks.

MyahLove1 Music is my saviour
  • replies: 3

Like i said previously, this is my first time here and if i'm posting to much I apologise. I was just wondering if others felt like music was their saviour? It doesn't matter what genre, what artist or what band? But does it feel like music takes you... View more

Like i said previously, this is my first time here and if i'm posting to much I apologise. I was just wondering if others felt like music was their saviour? It doesn't matter what genre, what artist or what band? But does it feel like music takes you away to another place where the depression can't get you?? x