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Sophie_M Sleep and Mental Health
  • replies: 0

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remem... View more

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remember things, regulate our emotions, or to feel excited and energised… it can change the way we think and feel in such a significant and impactful way. Whether it’s due to big life changes, global pandemics, financial or work stressors, health concerns (like menopause), how much ‘you’ time you have, or even unprocessed emotions you weren’t aware were there – so many things can impact how you sleep. All of this goes to show that not only do your daily habits, routines, and experiences play a huge role in maintaining healthy sleep cycles, but so does your mental health. And frustratingly enough, your sleep also impacts and informs your mental health and daily habits. Like most things, it’s a very easy cycle to fall into. So, it’s imperative that we are gentle and compassionate with ourselves on our journey to understanding what is making us so hypervigilant and unable to rest in the first place. Studies show that journaling or mindfulness practices throughout the day, healthy food, movement, sunshine, connection with loved ones, and support from health professionals can help us to feel more grounded and able to rest. But we are curious… what has worked for you? When do you notice that your sleep is most affected vs. when you get the best rest? And is there a way you could practice regulating your nervous system more throughout the day to help promote better sleep at night? We would love to hear your thoughts! Let us know if you have any questions and be sure to check out our page on ‘Sleep and Mental Health’ for more guidance and insight into a more supported and restful night’s sleep: Sleep and mental health - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue Looking forward to hearing from you! Kind regards, Sophie M

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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white knight Facing the emotional brink
  • replies: 1

If you are reading this you have likely been there or your partner has. It is when your emotions, due to a situation, slips down the control slide. At the bottom of that slide is tears, desperation and hopelessness. That feeling is almost indescribab... View more

If you are reading this you have likely been there or your partner has. It is when your emotions, due to a situation, slips down the control slide. At the bottom of that slide is tears, desperation and hopelessness. That feeling is almost indescribable. Some feel, when in this condition, that there is no future, no present and no past. You just dont care.I attended a therapist a few years back. He was clever and direct. I told him that 2 days prior I was in such a state. He said what were you going to do? I told him that I have, when in that state, a strong urge to walk into the bush away from ALL human beings and just survive day to day "in the wild". He then looked into my eyes closer than usual and said firmly "you would last about 3 months". I took that as I would not survive in any living way due to my inability to care for myself and my depression. It was after that meeting I strived to find the happy medium between a large population town (for me that was 4000 people upwards) and "the bush" My destiny became a town of 200 people 15 minutes drive from that town of 4000 people with all its facilities.. .I found the right balance. Why is this so important to this thread? Because there were some issues in life that caused me to regularly find myself in that desperate, sorrowful and deep emotional position. I was unstable.My point being, that ones decisions in life and lifestyle can make a bearing on your overall happiness thereby downloading to less times you find yourself at that "emotional brink". How important is this? Well that emotional brink can take you to your own demise...its that important. We simply cannot underestimate the seriousness of maintaining control of our emotions to a realistic level. We cannotlose total control. And to maintain control we have to introduce a plan so you and others aren't hurt in the long term. Use search to read the thread - think b4 you act The best time for this plan is when you are mentally sound. Accept that another bout will come and plan your tack on it. eg I will not walk away from my home, I will write down my feelings, I will keep my voice low volume and not yell at others, I will allow time to pass because in time things settle.You will put strategies in place not to feel emotional but so those emotions dont lead you to a place that you shouldn't be. A place that would also hurt those you love. We plan many things in our lives. We should plan what we do when we arrive at our emotional lows. Tony WK

Shazzba61 Functioning again!
  • replies: 2

I didn't think I could ever rejoin the workforce again. My panic attacks were out of control. It got so that I couldn't even leave the house or receive visitors. I was so afraid of having a panic attack that the fear of having a panic attack would ma... View more

I didn't think I could ever rejoin the workforce again. My panic attacks were out of control. It got so that I couldn't even leave the house or receive visitors. I was so afraid of having a panic attack that the fear of having a panic attack would make me have a panic attack!!! In the 1980's it seemed that GPs weren't very aware of symptoms of depression. After many years of being prescribed sedatives I finally found a GP that recognised my symptoms as 'depression'! Only because his wife had suffered similar symptoms and he'd made it his business to understand it! I thank God for this doctor even to this day because he set me on a course of treatment that made me feel normal again. He prescribed some medication for depression. I told this doctor that I am not depressed.!! . I don't feel sad at all! He explained that there are multiple 'facets' of depression and that chronic anxiety, panic attacks, obsessiveness, unwelcome thoughts (intrusive thoughts) were all associated with It and it comes from the brain lacking in certain chemicals that can be replaced by medication. I asked the dr why I needed these chemical replacements for my brain and he explained that some times people are under stress for such a long time ( either real or perceived ) that the glands that produce 'seratonin' . ...The stress relieving chemical... Is worn out and can't produce it anymore..it has to have some help to work again. That's what anti depressants do. So anyway I'm a 53 year old grandmother now and working and functioning normally only because of the anti depressants I take daily( 30 years now functional!!) al e t

Shazzba61 Anxiety and depression hand in hand
  • replies: 3

I was shocked to hear that my anxiety issues were linked to depression. When I researched 'depression' i discovered that obsessiveness, compulsions , intrusive and bad thoughts all linked to depression. I had thought I was going crazy but it turns ou... View more

I was shocked to hear that my anxiety issues were linked to depression. When I researched 'depression' i discovered that obsessiveness, compulsions , intrusive and bad thoughts all linked to depression. I had thought I was going crazy but it turns out to be a chemical imbalance in the brain that is easily treated with medication!! Yay!!!!!

giggles Hard work
  • replies: 2

Its funny how we interpret what hard work is. Some may assume it is the physical part that people need to do and that can be simply because they enjoy it. My hard work description is for the many many hours of learning about just how it was I was sup... View more

Its funny how we interpret what hard work is. Some may assume it is the physical part that people need to do and that can be simply because they enjoy it. My hard work description is for the many many hours of learning about just how it was I was suppose to be feeling throughout my life.That thing everyone else appeared to have but me. Its been 14 years since I admitted I needed help with depression because it really did get to beyond anything I could deal with today.I wanted out completely and that is just because I was fed up with having to expect myself to be running on everyone else's timeline. To do what was necessary and expected of me for what ever role I was put in or thought I should be doing. Today with all the avenues that are available to all of those reading this. I selected the best one now and that is me. those of you who do not believe they will ever get to the stage of feeling ok I hope you will hold on for the moment to basically click in a way that you understand because this is the way it has happened for me. I understand about myself now and I am not finished yet as I still trip up but that is fine with me.I can always apologize to myselfor check why I tripped and correct it. No different to correcting a spelling error so the word makes sense. I know how frustrating it can be with the meds but I have managed to get to not taking any now so I can only hope that this will show it can be done but off course I know that each person needs to move in their own way and time. I would never suggest anyone to come off anything just through reading something empowering. Have faith in yourself to find your way and feel ok about it. There are no instant answers for depression only time. Time to spend learning about everything and anything and putting it together for self. All the best Giggling definitely helps alot. Giggles

Beltane Yay!! I'm feeling really hopeful!!
  • replies: 1

Hi all, I posted last week feeling quite overwhelmed, anxious and depressed as even though I've been getting therapy for 3 years and have made many lifestyle changes, I eas still having massive problems trying to find a medication to help. Several pe... View more

Hi all, I posted last week feeling quite overwhelmed, anxious and depressed as even though I've been getting therapy for 3 years and have made many lifestyle changes, I eas still having massive problems trying to find a medication to help. Several people responded with words of comfort. I rang BeyondBlue, and from there saw my GP and spoke to my psychologist, and from there got referred to the emergency psych team for my area as obviously I was under considerable distress, made worse by the long waiting list for psychiatrist. M i have several medication intolerances and severe reactions so I was quite upset and distressed about not finding a medication that wouldn't make me very ill. I've obviously tried to deal with it through therapy alone but my quality of life has been really low- constant nausea, insomnia, multiple panic attacks, depressive symptoms, sudden mood swings. Haven't been able to work for 6 months. anyway all those lovely people at the emergency psych team, my psych, BeyondBlue, all the people who responded to me here.. It all finally added together and I got a psychiatric review. Started led a new tsblet 2 days ago- it's not an antidepressant or a benzodiazepine- it's something else (I know we're not supposed to name medications here so I wont.). I was told it would begin to work straight away but the very best effects would be seen after 2 weeks. the last 2 days have been the best days I've had in 6 months (probably in years to be honest). I've had 2 fantastic nights of really good sleep- waking up feeling refreshed, I've had no nausea at all (none! That's the first time in years!!), I'm eating decent food and have an appetite, I feel really quite calm. Like not zombied out- I still care about stuff. There's been 2 majorly stressful events happen in these 2 days (my bf got admitted to hospital emergency, and I rang into someone from my past) but weird thing is- Id normally be vomiting, nauseous, panicking, this kind of thing would normally freak me out but I'm FINE. Obviously i still care- in still concerned- but im not flipping out. I've had no mood swings, no panic attacks, nothing that usually stresses me (like driving in traffic) is stressing me- like its a bit annoying but totally fine. This is fantastic!! Is this how non-anxious people feel? Is this what a normal life is like? Obviously it's still early days so it could get even better!! i had had to share the happy news!!

SeanA Two Wolves
  • replies: 3

If there is one story that defines what goes on inside me - then it is this. It is reproduced from my martial arts blog: "This next piece is going to be a confession of sorts. Honesty that is not usually spoken out loud but takes place in all of us a... View more

If there is one story that defines what goes on inside me - then it is this. It is reproduced from my martial arts blog: "This next piece is going to be a confession of sorts. Honesty that is not usually spoken out loud but takes place in all of us at some stage. The situation took place recently. My instructor stood at the front of the class with his highest ranks next to him. I was one of them. He announced to the class that there were some brown belts looking at black belt and how excited he was at the prospect. The black belt on my left nudged me, as if to say the instructor was talking about me. I looked at him and shook my head as if to say, "No he doesn't mean me." Hang on, why not? And where did that negativity come from? Then I thought maybe I am my own worst enemy when it comes to backing my judgement and belief in myself. Maybe I am holding myself back from going to the next level. Maybe focusing on what I have achieved is stopping me from what I can achieve in the future. Ouch, that’s ego. Surely not me. Surely after 30 years plus of training I would possess the tenacity of a lion when it comes to achievement in any martial art. What happened was the ‘human’ side of me surfaced. The voice of the teenager who originally started martial arts to become confident still sits in there. Refusing to admit that this alter ego no longer exists is the same as believing that your instructor was always a black belt. Everyone struggles. Everyone has self doubt. Those who stick with their struggles overcome them in the long run. It is just a matter of time. The Rain Dance Researchers some time ago heard about a tribe in Africa that had a 100% success rate with their rain dance. Other tribes recorded a 50/50 success rate (sometimes it rained, sometimes it didn’t!) When they tracked down this tribe, they looked at the type of dance, the location, the words they used and everything they did in their particular ritual. Everything matched what other tribes did. They found no reason to have such an incredible record. Then one variable surfaced that made all the difference. They danced UNTIL it rained. So as humans wanting to achieve, it seems we underestimate the power of Osu No Seishin – Perseverance Under Pressure. So what now? Keep moving. The confidence and calmness that you desire lies on the other side of difficulty. Your instructors job is to present that difficulty. Your job is to confront it."

SeanA The Photo I Shouldn't Have Taken
  • replies: 2

The picture itself is 15 years old.Remember it like it happened yesterday. This place in Indonesia is famous for its rogue waves. A rogue wave, or “Roguey” in surfing vernacular, is a massive wave that break 100 m out the back and steam rolls over ev... View more

The picture itself is 15 years old.Remember it like it happened yesterday. This place in Indonesia is famous for its rogue waves. A rogue wave, or “Roguey” in surfing vernacular, is a massive wave that break 100 m out the back and steam rolls over everything and everyone. The boats that drop you in the surf sit 200 m out the back, nose to the horizon. I always wondered why as I had never seen a rogue wave.Then mother nature delivers this.It must have broken 50 metres out beyond the normal spot. Everyone was paddling and getting ready to duck dive. As that was happening I looked to my left and saw this. A surfers dream. The perfect wave.I sat on my board and juggled the cheap camera that was strapped to my arm. The other surfers at this stage had disappeared underwater, kicking for the bottom.The photo doesn't give credit to how close the wave is. Or how big it is. I pressed the shutter, hoping it was focused, and rolled off my board as the wave exploded.I didn't even get a decent breath.This picture is the product of me deciding to take in the scene that was too good to miss.Good choice.But what about other scenes that I missed because I was busy? When should I stop and take in the moment rather than rush by? Somewhere this week there is going to be one. Probably several.It doesn’t take much to appreciate something. All you do is stop and look on as an observer. The appreciation of the moment is not earth moving at first. It takes time to immerse yourself in the moment.The way to start … is to stop.Now.

white knight Embracing the embracer - calming the waters
  • replies: 2

There are some known comments "don't take me for granted" and "give me some respect" among many more. Such comments often come during a disagreement and they often make you more angry than you already are because you are at the height of your toleran... View more

There are some known comments "don't take me for granted" and "give me some respect" among many more. Such comments often come during a disagreement and they often make you more angry than you already are because you are at the height of your tolerance right? You are already stressed, fuming over some issue that flared. So let's talk about those moments immediately after such claims are made. What is your normal reaction? more anger, more arguing? Of course. Let's be honest. It's normal to defend yourself against claims that are hurtful right? But remember, these claims are about someone else's perspective and you are not inside that persons head ok, how could you understand what their perspective is? We as people with mental illness often get frustrated when those without a mental illness dont understand us. We crave that but dont get it. The most we get is compassion from those that can be compassionate, loving and caring and maybe have studied the topics. So isnt it fair to expect your partner to be understood also? Conflicts with our caring partners can send us off one our own somewhere - it is deeply hurtful and the less conflict the more stable we are. So I've thought of a challenge. I've done this challenge myself and it is hard but it works. One of the components is to lower your voice level and talk slowly. We know that when this is done the other yelling partner usually does the same. The challenge is, that during a disagreement when a claim is made that you want to answer/repel that you calmly sit down, ask your partner to sit down (it doesnt matter if they dont) and reply in your normal tone of voice at slow pace like the following. "show me some respect"! you answer "I love you very much and so I do respect you. Please tell me why you don't believe I have respect for you, I am listening" "you are so frustrating to talk to when it comes to finances"! you answer "I dont know why you find me frustrating, now please give me another chance and tell me when you become annoyed so I can adjust my responses, its all ok". This will take some practice. It isnt giving in. You will feel like you are allowing them to "win". Winning and losing an argument is allowing your emotions to dictate the moment. By accepting this challenge you are embracing the embracer at a time when you dont want to. You are effectively saying by actions - 'you care for me daily, this is my way of caring for you. I love you'. You are being fair. Life isnt all about us. Tony WK

white knight Defending yourself - dont be an easy target
  • replies: 0

When I think of those with a mental illness (including myself) and their standing in society I think of two words -lack of understanding and our vulnerability. Why vulnerability? Because by and large our minds are very "open".What you see is what you... View more

When I think of those with a mental illness (including myself) and their standing in society I think of two words -lack of understanding and our vulnerability. Why vulnerability? Because by and large our minds are very "open".What you see is what you get, honesty, lack of scheming thoughts. A while ago I wrote a passage on "So what is their mental illness" It centred around those in society that are bullies, whether it is them too that have mental illness undetected.?? So if we are more vulnerable than your average Joe Blow, are we easier to be taken advantaged of? I think so. Is in some cases, our lack of cognitive learning from our childhood made us easy targets? Here is a few examples I want to share with you. It was one winter in the northern suburbs of Melbourne when working as a labourer for a telco. The freezing winds lashed the land. My leading hand had the luxury of a closed cabin of the backhoe. I had thermal underwear and coats on. I got a sore throat and flu symptoms. It was so cold I was shaking and wanted to declare sick for the rest of the day. The foreman arrived and asked me what the problem was. As I started explaining that I had flu symptoms he interrupted and told me to board his car to talk. We sat in his car, heater on full. He said "it isnt that cold" and "your sore throat will pass" and "we have to finish that area today". So I replied "so if it isnt that cold why are we sitting here in a heated cabin"? and "you can help by swapping over positions every half hour if finishing is paramount".I wasnt popular. Another. My ex partner asked me about my hobby- model airplanes. "how much do you think you've spent on your hobby in the last 7 years. I replied "$11,000". She said "are you proud of that expenditure". My reply "yes, compared to the $35,000 we've spent on cigarettes for you" Of course these examples occur with anybody but I find that my actions of over comforting others , to allow them free reign on subjects is too lax- too obliging. I'm not often like the above examples and those examples are a reflection of planning following extreme discomfort or knowledge of a coming attack.Mostly I never see it coming. I lack defence. To manage your recovery from your mental illness requires many things. You must learn wit as part of recovery. Failure to do so can give wider implications like the torment that follows if you "let it ride".Stand up for yourself by turning the tables. Protect yourself by not being an easy target of the hypocrite.

gmc I feel courageous
  • replies: 6

Hello everyone! I've done a courageous thing these days: I wrote on my blog about being depressive and how would I expect people to change attitude on me by saying this outloud and that I am not afraid of anything anymore to say it. And I feel fine. ... View more

Hello everyone! I've done a courageous thing these days: I wrote on my blog about being depressive and how would I expect people to change attitude on me by saying this outloud and that I am not afraid of anything anymore to say it. And I feel fine. I am aware of the social riscs of being stigmatised by people and treat me like a child because of my depression, it already happens, but I still want to continue the social struggle with the attitude others have on depression and other mental illnesses. I will continue writing on my blog about this condition, about treatments, about my own experience with depression and I take it as part of my recovery. These days were also very hard, there were "those days" of struggle, even if I continue my treatment and my therapy, it does happen not to feel well, like I just don't want to get out of bed, I just want to stay and just breath and tv zapping. I would like to think I made a step forward and by trying to talk about this I will feel better and help other people too, so that they understand more about mental health and change attitude.