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BeyondBlue Hey there - read this to see what this section is all about
  • replies: 0

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a ... View more

Hello and welcome This is the Relationships and Family section where members can talk about what is happening in their lives and the people they live with. We know that who we live with can make a big impact on our wellbeing, both in a good way or a negative way. As always, we want to hear your story and how it impacts you and encourage everyone to support each other with kindness. There are a few things to consider when posting in this section so we can all get the most out of it: Everyone’s situation is unique. We all do our best to share what is important in our story but we can never share it all. Let’s be mindful we can’t know all of everyone’s story. Anonymous but public. These posts are available to everyone and while the moderation team keeps the Forums anonymous, posts are still online for everyone to read. Have a think about what you want to share to get the best support for you. Please stay safe. This space is an amazing way to seek support from others who might understand what you are going through. We want to hear how you are going and what is happening for you. Please also consider 1800RESPECT if you don’t feel safe or 000 if you are in danger right now. You deserve to be safe. Thank you again for joining this conversation, your contributions are worthy and important to us here. Beyond Blue

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Cara_Jan I was being used...
  • replies: 2

My "Best friend" had had a fight with her best friend and decided to hang out with me and my friend for the rest of the year! BUT... -------> She and (Her best friend) Tiana made up! I didn't mind at all. Of anything I was glad. But then They wouldnt... View more

My "Best friend" had had a fight with her best friend and decided to hang out with me and my friend for the rest of the year! BUT... -------> She and (Her best friend) Tiana made up! I didn't mind at all. Of anything I was glad. But then They wouldnt come near me kept ignoring me and-and.. I heard them talking about me! Im sure yous dont care but I have to get this out!!!!!!!!!!1

Wifehelp Want to help my husband
  • replies: 1

My husband has suffered anxiety and depression for about 10years but over the past few days he has been saying he can’t live and has having suicidal thoughts he is constantly crying and unable to see any positives. I have tried to get him to the hosp... View more

My husband has suffered anxiety and depression for about 10years but over the past few days he has been saying he can’t live and has having suicidal thoughts he is constantly crying and unable to see any positives. I have tried to get him to the hospital or suggested booking in with his GP but he keeps saying it’s pointless. I’m concerned as usually he will do one of these two things. Any suggestions on how to help him??

Guest_4593 Stuck
  • replies: 5

Im stuck..im the youngest of 4 . I was the go to child for my parents.. my parents divorced l bought the family home with my mother .all siblings move in and out now my mum lost her job and i feel like I'm going be taking care of everyone my whole li... View more

Im stuck..im the youngest of 4 . I was the go to child for my parents.. my parents divorced l bought the family home with my mother .all siblings move in and out now my mum lost her job and i feel like I'm going be taking care of everyone my whole life.. and i haven't had a life yet i never will. My siblings left had kids moved in and out and im just the stable home.. but i see no way that ill ever get my own life and i think its to late

Stevolica27 Marry the girl, marry the family
  • replies: 5

Hi there, I'm new here and just wanted to ask a question about relationships and outside people, including but not limited to family I have anxiety which originally developed around some trauma in my 20s (I'm 37) now, and generally, I don't think it ... View more

Hi there, I'm new here and just wanted to ask a question about relationships and outside people, including but not limited to family I have anxiety which originally developed around some trauma in my 20s (I'm 37) now, and generally, I don't think it gets that in the way or clouds my perspectives, but I'm searching for answers with that to hopefully eliminate that from my issues My partner and I have been together for nearly 7 years. She comes from a loving and supportive family with extended members close and two other or so families who often share in holidays etc (we've been on a few cruises as a large group and also my partner's family have a holiday home they regularly invite EVERYONE to) All of that is generally wonderful, but my experience is that it is often TOO MUCH. My partner's parents go to their holiday home ( 3 hours away) almost every long weekend and holidays. I'm totally cool with that and keen to go for a night here and there etc, but I just get pushed aside when there's a decision to go. My partner's siblings (one in particular) put a lot of pressure on her to go, and ultimately she wants to go, even I when I'd tried to talk (and get excited) about planning the long weekends etc together. My partner and I do go on holidays just the two of us and they can be at regular holiday times (her parents are always encouraging) but if we haven't got anything locked down it's like we (she) gets committed to "spending time with the family" .. I don't really have any family anymore but I encourage my partner to see hers as much as she likes, but in these situations I just feel like I come off second best, wasn't considered and just generally a low priority to my partner. I've tried articulating this to her but she puts her foot down and basically says if she decides that what she's doing, she's doing it and isn't interested in planning things together (with or without compromise. Any thoughts much appreciated!! Steve

fatfreefruche Surrounded by affection, but it’s always out of reach to me
  • replies: 2

I’ve always considered myself to be a very self-aware person, so I try to look inwards as much as possible and see how my decisions affect others. I am a 20 year old gay man, and I have never been able to experience anything intimately with another p... View more

I’ve always considered myself to be a very self-aware person, so I try to look inwards as much as possible and see how my decisions affect others. I am a 20 year old gay man, and I have never been able to experience anything intimately with another person. I am surrounded by each of my friends who are happy and content in their relationships, and it is something I crave so deeply. It hurts when all my friends are with their partners, and have someone to exchange love, when I sit alone with love to give but no one to give it to. I have been on the lookout, on as many dating apps as I can find. I have been on several dates since I came out (no problems with acceptance), but it always fizzles. I always find myself in situations where the other party involved is quite toxic, ghosts me without any obvious reason, or just simply isn’t interested, which is completely understandable from my end. A lot of the time, I seek support for people going through a similar thing, but it always tends to boil down to inward problems, like a lack of self-love, respect or acceptance. I am completely comfortable with the person I am, and without trying to sound conceited, I do not think I am off-putting to most. I find it easy to make friends but extremely difficult for something more intimate than that. I often go through periods of what I can only describe as a sort of melancholia, because I can never have any luck looking for someone, or even have anyone look for me. I don’t want this post to sound like I am seeking sympathy, but I genuinely want advice or even another opinion/insight as to why I am struggling so much, because it eats away at me and I have no one in my life who would understand. I want to make it clear that I am not seeking attention from a significant other, but I genuinely want to experience my life with someone special. I am a big advocate for loving yourself before loving someone else, and I truly do believe I am in touch with myself, and have love for myself.

Dwarfstar Friend has corona and stopped responding to messages
  • replies: 2

hi friends, One of my close friends overseas told me about a week ago they tested positive for coronavirus. They work at a meat processing plant and are now isolating. They have mild symptoms. The minute my friend informed me he had the virus however... View more

hi friends, One of my close friends overseas told me about a week ago they tested positive for coronavirus. They work at a meat processing plant and are now isolating. They have mild symptoms. The minute my friend informed me he had the virus however, he just stopped responding to my messages. Now I know I can't expect a response because every person experiencing this virus is unique and going through their own thing. But I am worried for my friend. How can I support someone who isn't responding right now? Thanks for your time! DS

Maddy626 Abusive mother - should I ask for an apology?
  • replies: 10

Hi, I'm currently caught up in a situation where my mother continues to send me abusive text messages and I have told her to stop because I am desperately trying to get through my studies, raise my 12yr old brother, and survive. She has recently thre... View more

Hi, I'm currently caught up in a situation where my mother continues to send me abusive text messages and I have told her to stop because I am desperately trying to get through my studies, raise my 12yr old brother, and survive. She has recently threatened to kill my cats if I don't return the cat I was looking after for her (the cat needed serious medical care (tail amputation and multiple broken bones) she also asked me to take the cat for her). When I visited her to talk about the cat she was upset that I have not 'gotten over' the abusive things she texted me (I can provide more information if needed). I'm very upset right now and I want to send a text message back asking for an apology. I also included a line (the text message has not been sent) asking if she actually loves me. Is this manipulative? Should I just not text anything at all? Should I accept that she wants to just move on and not push for an apology? I don't want to take the low-road, but after many years of this I'm exhausted and I want an apology. ... sorry for the rant, I'm not really sure who to talk to about all of this.

Olivia777 How can I stop resenting my husband?
  • replies: 7

Hello, I seem to have fallen into a vicious circle. We've been married for 5 years and have a toddler and 3 month old baby. I understand that I am going through major hormonal changes and my mood is greatly affected by this. We have ups and downs lik... View more

Hello, I seem to have fallen into a vicious circle. We've been married for 5 years and have a toddler and 3 month old baby. I understand that I am going through major hormonal changes and my mood is greatly affected by this. We have ups and downs like most people, we argue then make up but never resolve any issues we have. I find it impossible to have a conversation with him. I don't deal well with raised voices or being interrupted, so I get very emotional and frustrated, so the conversation usually ends with one of us walking away. One thing we both do is mimic each others bad behaviour, so if one of us does something, the other will find a way to do the same thing back. So nothing ever gets resolved. When he leaves for work, I spend time thinking about how wrong this is and how I need to change, and then when I see him I can't even bring myself to say 'Hello'. There are a number of things he has done, or not done, that are always on my mind and I can't forgive him. How can I change my attitude towards him? I am really struggling, I am angry, frustrated and can't bring myself to show him affection. I know I need help.

Dais Friendship Issues
  • replies: 3

Earlier this year my friend had a thing with another guy this didn’t last long and they ended things. Me and him have been friends for years, so the other night I asked him and another friend around to watch movies. She messaged him asking why he was... View more

Earlier this year my friend had a thing with another guy this didn’t last long and they ended things. Me and him have been friends for years, so the other night I asked him and another friend around to watch movies. She messaged him asking why he was at my house and had a bit of a go at him. She mentioned within their argument that she had told him that I had gone for other friends exes before and that hurt me because it wasn’t true. I just don’t know how to handle it because she’s mad I hung out with him without telling her when I wasn’t trying to be secretive I just didn’t think I had to tell her.

Ceedant Been seeing a new person, feeling anxious and I'm not sure why
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I've recently met a new person on an app. We've been talking for about 3 weeks and have now gone on three (virtual/video chat) dates. All went well. We're both pretty quiet people but enjoyed each other's company and played games together for... View more

Hi all, I've recently met a new person on an app. We've been talking for about 3 weeks and have now gone on three (virtual/video chat) dates. All went well. We're both pretty quiet people but enjoyed each other's company and played games together for a few hours. Despite things objectively looking good - I should be feeling over the moon - I've been feeling really anxious about this since the 3rd date. Normally, I'm not an anxious person, even in dating. At the end of the 3rd date I wanted to ask her to meet up in person but I couldn't get the words out! I instead sent her a message on Facebook (where we had been talking/checking in with each other once a day or so) asking to meet in person, telling her I've been enjoying spending time with her, but haven't got a reply. She was exhausted from a pretty big day, so put it down to that. The following morning, I messaged her to wish her a good day (as we've been doing that) but still no response. I feel I just want to pour my feelings out to her - let her know how I feel about her, that I'm really liking her. It wouldn't be the right way to go about it, especially through a Facebook message and especially given it's very early days. I'm also mindful that I don't want to smother her. Am I being anxious over nothing here? Any advice/reassurance would be amazing.