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PTSD and trauma

A space for discussing post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), domestic abuse, sexual abuse and other trauma. Please note some content may be distressing.

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A_Tech PTSD for Medical and First Responders
  • replies: 276

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting t... View more

Hi, Well obviously this my situation. I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting to others). Im a 40 year old female that has spent the last 10years in the State Trauma Hospital as an Anaesthetic Technician. My PTSD was brought about after years of exposure to shocking traumas, deaths, and no support from management. I would love to hear from anyone that has a similar story, or just wants to chat. Cheers

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Raven87 Unjust custody situation
  • replies: 1

What would you do? Long story short. Move in with husband and his family. Naive. Didn't know how controlling they were going to get. Get pregnant early on in the relationship. My father promises to sell his vintage car if we ever need it. Later reneg... View more

What would you do? Long story short. Move in with husband and his family. Naive. Didn't know how controlling they were going to get. Get pregnant early on in the relationship. My father promises to sell his vintage car if we ever need it. Later renegs it. Won't explain why. Gaslights me. After the baby is born. Get Post natal depression. Husband's parents kick us out. Husband loses his job xand I couldn't get work. My parents go overseas for months. My parents eventually get back. My in laws use the legal system against me and file for custody of my daughter. Husband begs me back. Many empty promises of getting custody of my daughter back. Move in with him (without in laws) Many empty promises of getting our daughter back. Marriage becomes financially, emotionally and physically abusive. Move back in with my parents and baby. I feel like such a fool. But yet don't get any answers as to why my father screwed us over.

Gizmo6 Lost. Trying to cope with 4 deaths & my rape trial dropped
  • replies: 4

I feel like I’ve reached my limit. Aside from previous trauma, the past few years have really tested my resilience, especially the last 12 months. I’ll try to summarise.My nan died, my friend died from an accident, my mum died after fighting cancer f... View more

I feel like I’ve reached my limit. Aside from previous trauma, the past few years have really tested my resilience, especially the last 12 months. I’ll try to summarise.My nan died, my friend died from an accident, my mum died after fighting cancer for a few years - caring for mum at the end was the hardest thing I’ve endured, for various reasons - my beloved dog died, I was going through the absolutely awful and traumatic legal process of a rape case, which fortunately finally ended with a trial date set.I came into 2024 though with so much hope, for positive change, and potential happiness.8th Jan, I get told the DPP decided to drop my case, there would be no trial. After all of the immense stress & trauma from the process (that I ended up in hospital for months from when I tried to end my life). Suddenly, it’s over, just like that, the government gave up on me - it was too hard to fight for me in court. 15th Jan I took my other dog to the vet she was having trouble breathing. Immediate X-rays revealed she had collapsed lungs and I’d be best to say goodbye in a matter of days.3 days later take her to my normal vet (yes, yesterday), who says actually it might just be fluid on the lungs caused by an infection- we will try meds for 2 weeks. I should have been ecstatic, but I was so shocked. Of course, it’s fantastic news, she’s my world. But now I feel numb, and totally lost. The intense and devastating emotions over the 2 weeks have I think finally broken me. And my poor doggo is still not well I have to listen to her struggling to breathe all of the time which is heartbreaking and I have no idea what’s going to happen or when. I don’t know what to do with myself, or my feelings, or lack thereof.

David35 PTSD from mum's cancer and brother's betrayal
  • replies: 45

I've been experiencing intense panic/rage attacks lately. A few weeks ago I punched a door. I thought this was the end of it. Then again today. I have this anger built up over issues that have occurred in the past few years which I'll describe now.Mu... View more

I've been experiencing intense panic/rage attacks lately. A few weeks ago I punched a door. I thought this was the end of it. Then again today. I have this anger built up over issues that have occurred in the past few years which I'll describe now.Mum had cancer treatment for several years and in that time my brother, his wife and family stopped associating with mum and I. So I was not only dealing with the situation of mum's illness, but the betrayal. The problem is now that mum is better, I find that I can't talk or listen to certain topics, or else I go into a rage. It just gets too much. Illness, my brother's wife and her treatment of us have both deeply traumatised me. How can I deal with this? I get counselling, but whereas I've tried to compartmentalise it, mum keeps dragging up these uncomfortable feelings. I have very low tolerance and can't cope with too much stress

Lick Desperately seeking reassurance
  • replies: 2

I was sexually abused at the age of 10 by a family friend and now I’m paying the price . I’m 60 years old in March . 3 yrs ago I finally started to get professional support but also advised via email to my parents how my Dads words about the abuse ha... View more

I was sexually abused at the age of 10 by a family friend and now I’m paying the price . I’m 60 years old in March . 3 yrs ago I finally started to get professional support but also advised via email to my parents how my Dads words about the abuse has had a great impact on my mental health . my Dad said I deceived him , he feels sorry for my other sister ( who was abused ), he thought him and I were good .I deserved it , get over it and the past is the past . when the perpetrator tried to abuse me I snapped and ran as fast as my little legs would take me .My Dad was waiting for me to get home as back in the days you were free to play at the park as it was safe .When I walked in the door my Dad made me stand on the kitchen chair and accused me of being over at the river by myself , I told my Dad that’s a lie but he continued to belt me for ages , I felt so seek I lied and said I needed to go to the toilet . this was the punishment I got because the perpetrator lied as a form of punishment because I rang from his bedroom . i spend years looking after my 3 children as a single mum and put my needs aside . my Dad and mum snd my sister continue to not talk and o find my already bad mental health going down hill even more .I started therapy due to being suicidal and when I reached out to my older sister about 3 years ago she shut me down and said she doesn’t know how to deal with me and hung up over the phone . theres lots of family dramas going on within my family with other sisters who straight away get support , follow up phone calls to check on there welfare but with me it’s different . i feel extremely abandoned, really mad and just simply don’t want any thing to do with my family but my conscious is telling me otherwise . i want to cut ties as I’m not spoken to any way but fear I’m going to be the worst person in the world . i have grandchildren now and am really busy with enjoyable things to do but if I choose to not attend a family get together I’m made to feel bed I can’t win either way but this is affecting my sleep , is cutting ties the best thing as I think it is but want reassurance Thank you for your much valued and needed response

Lick I feel saddened by the lack of concern and support by my family
  • replies: 11

Hii have recently finished my second group of psychology sessions over a period of 3 years for PTSD , depression and anxiety .my problems are associated with childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence which has been a result my past .Im 58’yrs old ... View more

Hii have recently finished my second group of psychology sessions over a period of 3 years for PTSD , depression and anxiety .my problems are associated with childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence which has been a result my past .Im 58’yrs old and I just think my family show no concern for what Im going through and always say that’s in the past , obviously i know that but you have these reoccurring thoughts , negative remarks from family members which often get me annoyed .My understanding was that your initial point of support should be at home and with family but I have found that not to be true .ive been there for members of my family through their bad times , helping with drug addicted family members , carer for my disabled sister ( disabled as result of domestic violence )., my Dads drinking problems , helped my sister look after her grandson but when I’m at rock bottom and wanted to commit suicide I have no understanding , support from any of them .Apparently I deceived my Dad re my sexual abuse but I have 3 sisters that also were but I was effected worse and abuse more severe .my Dad only feels sorry for one of my sisters and he thought him and I were good .i try to get through my days but will not at any time but up with my family throwing negative remarks in my face when I’m struggling and then I defend myself by giving my opinion back to get cut off and things thrown back at me .ive found it hard to get through my days but find myself not wanting to have any connection with family especially as I said when I’ve helped on numerous occasions and then feeling no one is there for me . os it right how I feel? your opinion if you have gone through the same will be appreciated

Speechless How to talk to older parents about your mental health?
  • replies: 3

Its very hard for me to talk about my mental health to my mum. Not because of me feeling shy but because she doesn’t understand it and doesnt want to, even briefly. Its incredibly hard for me, ive been put in situations of trauma and grief and compou... View more

Its very hard for me to talk about my mental health to my mum. Not because of me feeling shy but because she doesn’t understand it and doesnt want to, even briefly. Its incredibly hard for me, ive been put in situations of trauma and grief and compounding depression as well as social phobia all my life, recently been in acute distress and having whole days and nights of crying and not being able to function at all. Because i love with my parents, i like to get some validation and support from my mum, to let her know whats going on for me but i cant even get any understanding or any emotional support because of her hearing disability and limited patience with a sentence or certain words, she comes off as extremely rude to me and gets annoyed at me, doesnt want to know and treats mental illness like something negative and like im selfish to talk about me and my problems. She will make it worse and say certain things that can be quite nasty and old fashioned, makig me seem like im the problem. When all i wanted was a bit of comfort. I come off feeling so much worse than before and it can make the day a crying one again. But when your so desperate for comfort and support and all this stuff everywhere about talking to someone about your issues, I cant get any comfort at home and my only friend is a paranoid schizophrenic who has a meth addiction and in cycles of functioning, non functioning and paranoia, aggression, preoccupation, delusions of grandeur etc. My therapist is on holidays so its extremely hard.

brinkers EMDR effects
  • replies: 1

I have been undertaking EMDR with my psychologist for a number of months now (took a break after several months, now immersed in a second round). My experience has been that I have felt very sad indeed between sessions, and have cried intensely and w... View more

I have been undertaking EMDR with my psychologist for a number of months now (took a break after several months, now immersed in a second round). My experience has been that I have felt very sad indeed between sessions, and have cried intensely and with very regular frequency. I feel vulnerable and depressed. My mood improved after the first break from treatment, but now, back in EMDR sessions again, I am experiencing neveu similar symptoms (although not crying as often). I am hoping that others might share their experiences of hie they have felt between EMDR sessions. For me it’s a difficult and lonely place to be in.

Shell_02 Why do councillors always think I’m ok when I really am not
  • replies: 1

When I go to any type of therapy I always come across as ok. I think it’s because they don’t see me at my worst. I am often in a constant state of flight or fight. When I’m like that my reasonable self disappears and I can become angry or extremely u... View more

When I go to any type of therapy I always come across as ok. I think it’s because they don’t see me at my worst. I am often in a constant state of flight or fight. When I’m like that my reasonable self disappears and I can become angry or extremely upset. I can do and say things that I wouldn’t in normal circumstances. I then get depressed and sometimes have thoughts of suicide. I feel worthless, unloved, alone and feel I have nothing to look forward to. I withdraw from people and don’t enjoy doing things I normally enjoy. Then after awhile I pick myself up and start to climb out of my hole. I build up my walls again and try to get on with things but the hurt and anxiety is still there just hiding behind my walls. It’s always at this time I tend to have appointments and my “reasonable” self is back. I can tell them how I have been but I never get help. I don’t just want to talk, I want some help. I want someone to give me the tools to help me control my emotions but I never get that. They always think I’m ok and I know I am not. What can I do to get the help I need.

allmakessense Just found out my mum is a narcissist after 35 years
  • replies: 7

I feel like it was obvious that she was a narcissist, but it never is. It all makes sense now. But the making sense part is the hardest part. I feel sad, I feel alone, I feel like an orphan... When I realised the one person that was meant to love and... View more

I feel like it was obvious that she was a narcissist, but it never is. It all makes sense now. But the making sense part is the hardest part. I feel sad, I feel alone, I feel like an orphan... When I realised the one person that was meant to love and care for me didn't, it hits me so very hard. Not only did she make me worthless, unloved and uncared for, for some reason - realising that all now - makes it so much harder. It's like all the pain she caused me over the years has just come at me full force now. It's not as if I didn't feel it at the time, but I thought I had to win her love (and it's not very often that I was able to do that). I thought working it all out might've been a 'freeing' feeling but it's heavy. Can anyone else share how they coped when the first realised their parent/s were narcissists. I am seeing a psychologist already and will be seeing them again soon, and they are well aware of this. But today I just felt like reaching out, as it's not easy.

HopefulMum Relationships and CPTSD
  • replies: 2

Hi friends.Just wondering how you all navigate relationships with CPTSD. I struggle with feelings of abandonment and not feeling significant enough.This can be so triggering, especially in my marriage and as a Mum of 3.I guess what I want to know is.... View more

Hi friends.Just wondering how you all navigate relationships with CPTSD. I struggle with feelings of abandonment and not feeling significant enough.This can be so triggering, especially in my marriage and as a Mum of 3.I guess what I want to know is.. when something triggers us, is it healthy for the relationship for us to address the issue, try fix it and set a boundary around how we need to be treated in future? Or do we just do the work on our own reactions to the situation and say nothing? I have so many boundaries I am trying to set after 12 years of not speaking up, but I am met with anger, yelling and zero understanding of where I'm coming from, and am made to feel like I am the problem.This causes me to spiral into a depression and gives me feelings of hopelessness.Thank you for any help you can give.