Not in a good space

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

It's like a feeling just bubbling up to the surface. It's panicky and disgusting and I dont' know what to do with it. There's no thoughts associated with it. It's a feeling. A really gross one. I called the Suicide Call Back service. I didn't find them helpful. What do you do? What helps you?

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

There's been a lot of concern lately about the amount of money given to private schools and not public schools, it's a real problem and definitely worth your looking at it, I'd be fascinated to hear your thoughts on it all.

I know your anxiety is debilitating and wish I could help...my thoughts were that medication was a huge help to me when I suffered badly from it and I doubt I would have got through without it, and I wonder if your psych has put you on something to help you, poor thing you!!!!

I am a bit off colour after having the shot the other day, so apols for the brief reply, I will do better tomorrow but think I need a mug of hot soup!

You can only do your best... hang in there. You made it to GROW and that was fantastic! hugs.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Round the monopoly board we go.. ooh goody, landed on the vet again! Roll again, now it’s the dentist…

I’d like to not play anymore

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy,

Lass I'm so sorry I wasn't able to be here for you over the last few days... you sound so very low again...

Needing another vet visit, plus a dentist visit would be very stressful for anyone even if everything else was going well... has Stormy's ear flared up or is it something else??... lass check if there a public dentist place near you... they are so much cheaper... though you might have to wait a bit longer to get in depending on what is wrong... or you could ask at the place you get food vouchers if it is possible to get help paying for the dentist...

I will keep popping in to check on you lass...

Huggliest of hugs

Paws

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Paws

Thanks for your concern. My cat needed the vet. I thought it was time for a “long nap” but the vet said to give him a chance at treatment. He’s 18 and not too well. One hump after another. I just can’t do any more things so I skipped prac and I’m staying in bed. Will worry about the consequences later. I can’t and that’s that.

I know you don’t like to talk about yourself too much, but I really hope your weekend went ok and you were able to enjoy seeing your friend. Does Woofa like extra company?

Hugs, Katy

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy,

If you can't then you can't... there is a limit to the number of balls we can keep in the air at once... some days even keeping one ball in the air is too much... lass please don't beat yourself up over it... snuggles with Stormy &/or puss sound best...

I'm sorry to hear about puss... it's so very hard when our pets get old & 18 is amazing... sometimes treatment can make a difference... sometimes not so much... it's ok to go with your instincts if you think it's time to let him go... you know puss better than the vet... & you love him more... know whatever you decide will be the right thing...

I was so stressed after my friend left yesterday lunchtime that I retreated to bed & stayed there until 10 this morning... it was nice catching up... but a big part of me just wanted it over & I found myself getting anxious about stupid small petty things... it didn't help my hip & lower back were giving me hell... Woofa loves visitors... she won his heart because she spoilt him with pats & ear rubs... but he wasn't as pleased about her sitting on his spot on the couch (it's only a 2 seater )... he tried sitting on her but ended up sitting on me...

I'll keep popping in

Big bear hug from me & Woofa sends snuffles

Paws

[ecomama]

Dear Katy, lots happening there!

I'm really proud of you attending the GROW group, so you found it helpful?

How did you find that Webinar?

I hope the dentist is as painless as possible both physically and to the hip pocket!
Awww darling pussy cat. It's so hard when they reach such a grand age, we love them SO darned much. But I have to keep reconciling myself in these cases that I would rather them live to a grand old age with me than pass away when they're so young.
I hate it either way, as we all do ofcourse.

I know the decision around the topic of your thesis is a difficult one to make BUT I KNOW you will do a brilliant job of whatever topic you decide.

Oh yes Hanna, it's become a long standing issue that Private school get A LOT more funding per student than Public Schools and it has NEVER made sense to me.
Just another example of the "Matthew Effects" coined by researchers ie from the Bible stating 'the rich get richer and the poor get poorer".
You'd think we'd have learnt since the Bible was written so long ago - but we don't!

On a more positive note! I've been creative with feeding my daughter's border collie and my own poodle this week by adding some chicken to our back yard eggs as an omelette for their dinners.
Hopefully this practice at times will help the dollars stretch further feeding them.

Many Blessings to you all
Love EM

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy and Em and Paws and everyone

Wow I'm actually here for a minute! I've been battling with the computer for a couple of days now - it works for a few minutes and then crashes again... I've been looking at tablets online but I don't know how you chose which one to buy!!! I think my hard drive is going.. anyway sorry to all that I haven't been able to be here much.

Katy, as long as puss is comfortable and still able to enjoy some things, I'd keep him/her going. It's when they are just suffering that you make the decision about the long sleep. Sorry you've had this worry.

I have my car in for it's first service in forever, depending on what they find wrong, I may have enough left to purchase a tablet, because this computer is definitely on the way out.

A short post but wanted to say hi to everyone. xoxoxoxo

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Good morning

Nice to see you all here! I have a big headache today, probably from too much lying in bed and stressing. Time to pop a pill I think.

Paws, I’m glad you got through the weekend ok. I can relate to “just wanting it over”, as I sometimes feel like that with my son here. It’s nice, but hard too. Love the mental image of Woofa trying to work out where to sit lol

EM, that’s a bit fancy with the omelette! Storm would be most jealous, so I won’t tell her! Yes, I’m liking GROW. It’s like a real life version of here. Real people with real problems, and a willingness to talk about them and offer support to others. I’ve met a lot of people over the years who tell me they have anxiety, and not to belittle their experiences which are quite valid, but it doesn’t seem to impact their lives to a great degree. To be around people who are really struggling, I can relate, and I fit. And it’s not just anxiety, it’s the full spectrum.

Hanna, maybe google “best tablets 2021” or something like that. There’s a couple of websites that do ratings but not sure I can mention them here. The prices seem to vary a lot. I have a laptop that you can also use as a tablet, which is cool.

Really not sure about my cat. It wasn’t my vet I saw, he must have been on leave and got someone in. I’ll make another appointment in a few weeks I think, and just see how we go prior. At the moment cat is curled up snoozing on the bed. Another wet miserable day here. Katy

[ecomama]

Hey Katy, well I wish I could give Storm a backyard egg omelette because my dog is OVER them now lol. Big pats to Storm and Big Hugs to YOU!

I'm really glad the GROW group is a good fit for you!
It's so darned hard to find a group that does fit.
Some only fit "for a while" too, but we can make some nice contacts, even if they're only for a while also.

I found this with the Breaking Free Course for women in or leaving DV relationships years ago.
We ALL knew exactly how each part of it felt. We weren't encouraged to share much at all, thank goodness really. We learnt SO MUCH. I met wonderful courageous women there. The next few years were extremely telling. Some left, took the actions required and some stayed and are still there. Sadly.

You may find a similar thing with your group?
Some may establish far better mental wellbeing and some may not.

I was talking with my psych friend last night and she was saying that it's really important that we learn to name our emotions. She was more referring to raising boys as a single mum.

Likening this to anxiety.... there seems to be a parallel.
Naming the situations / people / places that seem to raise our anxiety levels helps alot.
When I narrowed exact places down to a PERSON - with my psychs help last year, I was able to do exposure therapy on my own (she trained me about how to do this autonomously) and over a matter of a few weeks I was able to go places I hadn't been for years.

I still do this process when needed right up to today.

It wasn't easy nor comfortable AT ALL.
But it was cleansing.

The simultaneous step also is setting up boundaries.
Similarly difficult to do but SO worthwhile getting good at!

Well I'm taking the kids to 'one of those places' now lol, wish me luck!

Bestest wishes to you too dear Katy
Love EM

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy and everyone

Well the car service came to nearly $400 today instead of the two hundred I had expected and the hard drive on my laptop died today and now I don't have the money for a tablet. Will come by briefly when I can. Having a meltdown and big cry this evening 😥

Wish my two well off brothers would at least ring me once in a blue moon to check on me but I don't even know where they live - they won't even let me know their addresses.

Hope you're going OK Katy and Em. 🐕🐾