FESTIVE SEASON STRUGGLES

[Doolhof]

Season's Greetings everyone.

We have a lovely cheery Christmas and New Years thread started up in the Social Zone. Hope you can drop by there and share some joy and happiness.

This is the alternate thread, where you can share the not so pleasant memories of Christmas or the concerns you may have for Christmas 2016.

For me, my depressive brain decides to hassle me about Christmas in November! That is so unnecessary! I need to break this habit!

So on this thread you can share the negative and hopefully find a positive at the end.

You might like to share what the worst present was that you ever received, or how sad and miserable you are at Christmas.

By sharing, we may well be able to help and support each other through a time that can be very tough for some.

This is the place to vent, the thread on the Social Zone is also waiting for you to add your happy thoughts and memories of Christmas and New Years.

Thinking of you all, hugs from Mrs. Dools

[Moonstruck]

Well I am a Grinch and no hesitation in admitting it! Bah Humbug....call me Scrooge...I don't mind.

Yes it would be great Destiny Driver if I COULD think of Christmas as just another day...but they won't let me!! The stores, the letter box crammed full of buy this, buy that, tinsel, baubles, taped music everywhere ALREADY...the supermarket has it already....all the shoppers were horrified....oh God help me...get me outta here! And they're always warbling about sleighs, snow, frosty cold, chestnuts roasting on an open fire.......I loathe this time of year!!

The undue stress it puts on folk who don't have loved ones, don't have family, don't have money to spend....it's like rubbing salt into the wounds of the lonely, reminding them again and again what is "lacking" in their lives......even if I close doors and windows, pull down the blinds, Christmas still manages to find me....it seeps in through the cracks!!!! Aaaargh!

[Ellu]

Dear Moonstruck,

You obviously find Christmas overwhelming and want to escape. But it is almost impossible to escape with all the shops full of tinsel and baubles and gifts which no-one would want anyway. I have a suggestion of a novel way to "celebrate" Christmas. Get in touch with one of the large charities such as the Salvation Army or St. Vincent de Paul and volunteer to help serve Christmas Lunch to homeless people and people who are severely disadvantaged. a) It would give you somethig to do on Christmas Day and b) You might find the experience really meaningful, in the true spirit of what Christmas is supposed to be. Just a thought, but volunteering to help others who are in difficulty can be a really rewarding experience. All the best,

Ellu

[Doolhof]

Hi Destiny Driver,

Your attitude to Christmas Day is what gets you through. Maybe for some of us who hurt so much at Christmas, being able to think of it as just another day would be very beneficial.

That does not mean that you are a Grinch at all. It sounds like you have found a way to appreciate the day and accept it for what it is. Another day on the calendar.

Hopefully your parents left you with plenty of food and what ever else you needed while they were away! I recently heard of an 18 year old girl being left home with no money and limited provision for months. When the family dog became very ill, she had to ask her boyfriend for some money so she could take the dog to the vet.

Anyway, hopefully the weather will be lovely on December the 25th and you enjoy what ever you decide to do on that day!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi Shred,

It would be great if I was always able to put my own suggestions into practise in my own life! Ha. Ha. It is easy to say than actually do, all I write!

Speaking to your psychologist may be very beneficial. I am trying to get back in touch with my psychologist. I need a new Mental Health Care Plan so might not be able to see her until next year. So I will need to make decisions myself as how to approach this Christmas.

I'm sorry to read about the loss of your loved one and your Mum. Like I mentioned, lighting the candles really helps me. You could purchase some candles to take away with you.

When we are away for Christmas, I take a Christmas display with me that I can put on a bedside table in a motel room, just so I have a bit of Christmas with me. If we take the car, I put in more stuff. One year I almost filled up the boot of the car! I had even packed the 6 ft high Christmas tree, lights, decorations and all!

As you may be going away this year, you might like to decorate a small section of your home. The cheap shops usually have small table top Christmas trees. I will be doing something similar this year as we are going away too.

Please know as well, this is a safe place to share your grief and sad thoughts relating to the loss of loved ones.

Hugs to you, from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi Moonstruck,

Christmas can hit you right in the face can't it!

We are very fortunate living in a small town as there don't seem to be any Christmas decorations in sight...yet. The Post Office might put up a little bit of a show maybe. There aren't any shops to go into here in this town. We don't get junk mail here either.

When you do get it, just chuck it in the recycling bin.

When in the larger shopping centre, I try to enjoy the colour and prettiness of the decorations.

I sometimes think of sitting on Santa's couch with him for a chat, a bit like a psychiatrist visit, only cheaper! Ha. Ha.

Hope you manage to find ways to get through this silly season!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi Ellu,

In the past, I have done just as you have suggested to Moonstruck.

I attended at a local Church who put on a meal for anyone who doesn't have any where else to go for Christmas. Once all the meals were served to the people, us helpers sat down and ate with everyone at the tables, mingling with them.

It was a lovely occasion. My husband was at home alone, he has said he would be fine and didn't care that it was Christmas Day. So we were both happy!

Cheers all from Mrs. Dools

[Xavius]

Ah, Christmas! The time of year filled with friends and family!

Well so they say anyway. I'm alone this Christmas. It's not the first time either.

I remember working at a shopping centre during Christmas one year. It filled me with so much rage and hatred for the holiday. But there's probably other reasons too.

I avoid all shops and take time off over Christmas just to avoid it all.

Richard

[Moonstruck]

Well,that's exactly what I am planning to do Ellu - I did it a few years back when the then, man in my life and I had broken up (we always spent the day together, neither of us being Christmas people) and I thoroughly enjoyed helping out among strangers - thanks for reminding me, I will start making enquiries as to who needs me this year.....

they will be doing me a favour, as well as my doing my bit for others who unlike me, feel very much alone if not surrounded by friends and family on "the day". the hype, the build-up, the over emphasis on "love, sharing, family, friends, giving,etc" has gotten completely out of hand and causes distress to so many.....dreadful time!

[Doolhof]

Hi Moonstruck,

Sounds like an excellent plan!

[james1]

Hey Mrs Dools,

Wow that sounds like a really nice community event. I think I'd like to volunteer for something similar.

I might look into that instead. Ideally I will have moved out by then into my new place so I won't feel the need to escape home/Sydney but we'll have to wait and see.

Thanks for starting this thread 🙂 You're a champion.

James