Anyone had to spend days alone without anyone to talk to?

[Hanna3]

Hi all, apart from here and a brief visit to church last night (to make it feel Christmassy and to just be with people) I've had day after day for weeks now with nobody at all to talk to. This time of year especially it's really depressing. Old friends that live far away are gradually losing contact with me - I ring them but they don't ring me. I understand they're busy with their live elsewhere but still it's hard when you're lonely. I'm going to a Christmas Eve service at the local church tomorrow night to at least be with people for a little while... but otherwise all day I'm alone, just me and the dog. Sometimes I strike up a conversation on BB but then the other person disappears and that's the end of that...

How are people meant to cope with prolonged periods of social isolation? I read, I watch DVDs, normally I'd go for long walks with the dog but thick smoke from bushfires and intense hot weather have stopped that. I go to a café alone sometimes. Any ideas/help?

[Hanna3]

Hi Dools

Yes I don't know why people get so cranky! I got a paper copy of the vaccination certificate just in case my phone plays up, it's good to have.

I don't know if I did the right thing with my friend who became abusive. I miss chatting to her. Trouble is, I don't know that I could ever talk with her the way I used to. The email she sent me was so nasty, she criticised very personal things about me and said she would only talk to me once a week as I was boring.

Then she rang and apologised and then when I bumped the phone in the early morning the text messages were so vicious I deleted them and spent a few days recovering it was so nasty.

Then she wanted me back again because she said she missed the friendship. When I said that I didn't know how to trust her to not be abusive again I got more abuse.

I miss talking to her but I don't know if I could ever talk with her like I used to anyway. Once you've said horrible things you can't take them back and I don't know if I could ever really trust her.

Any thoughts dear people here?

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws Dools Katy Grandy everyone

Problem! I have not made a single woman friend here. Covid last year and this year hasn't helped.

My one friend I knew years ago lives right behind me, two minutes walk away. She was my one support person here. She is in a codependent relationship with an abusive man who she now has to pay out a claim for part of her house as she divorced him but still has him living with her. I think she needs him to be dependent on her.

She vaguely knows G my friend. I emphasise it's just a nice friendship between him and me. She got furious with me when she heard about it and now she doesn't see me or speak to me unless it's something she can't avoid.

We used to have a weekly cuppa and Sam loves her. We haven't seen her for months now.

I don't know how to deal with this. He and I are both single and currently it's just a nice friendship. He is a very kind person.

Is she jealous? She knows I am alone and without supportive family. What is the problem if he and I are friends? She has been having a relationship with a married man who is not going to leave his wife.

So I've lost a friend because of a friendship!

Any thoughts about this that can help? If I try to speak to her she is always cranky and critical so I am keeping away. She never meets me for a catch up any more.

Thanks kind people!

🥀🌿

[Paw Prints]

Hello Hanna,

Ummm well my 2 cents worth would be to advise you to stay away from those two ex friends... of course only you can decide... but I feel that whilst a friend may have a bad day & be cranky for a bit... the first of these two has been nasty over a long period, for no justifiable reason & she can no longer to be trusted... putting up with abuse just to maintain contact with someone isn't a healthy relationship & you deserve to be treated better... with the 2nd one who lives behind you... have you asked her outright what her problem is with you & G being friends?... it might be something that the two of you can talk through & clear up... but if not, then I think no contact is healthiest.

You have had a shocker of a run when it comes to being able to meet new people... unfortunately with the christmas new year period coming up just as restrictions ease, that may limit any options you will have to meet new people until early next year... there are lots of different community groups (both charity & social) you could look at joining or even just going along to see if they might be for you...

I hope you are safe with the wild weather crossing NSW

Hugs

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws

Thanks for that! I've been chatting with an old friend back in coastal town today, she's been waiting to move to New Zealand for almost 2 years now due to covid and she's desperate as lots of her belongings are already over there with a relative! She's hoping to get there December...

Anyway talking to her and two other friends there is reassuring, as I do have women friends but not in this town!!! Another friend moved to a town that just had a tornado but she's OK.

I wish I felt able to talk to my friend here but she now always says she's too busy to catch up. We used to meet up regularly.

I'm sad about my other friend but I didn't feel I would be able to confide in her or trust her not to get nasty again.

All the Covid has meant everything has been off here - courses, volunteering... So yes, not much opportunity to mix very much! And xmas next!!! I'm jinxed!!!

Thanks for responding. Today turned so cold it's like winter and I've been lazy and stayed in all afternoon. I'm going to watch a movie on SBS movies tonight.

Sam is still tired, I guess the infection and antibiotic... It might be good he's having a restful afternoon.

Hope you're warm and snug there with Woofa. There's a man here who walks a big old Great Dane and it looks at Sam as if he doesn't think much of this silly little mutt!

Hugs 💞🐑🌳

[Paw Prints]

Hello Hanna, wave to everyone,

I think you must have sent your freezing cold weather down here.... it has been wet the last few days, but not too cold, however this afternoon the temperature has plunged... I've just put the heater on & of course Woofa has taken prime position.

I saw a koala today!!! We went into the chemist in big town & on the way home a koala decided to dash across the road ahead of me... they do look silly when they try to run fast... then the daft thing decided to stop in the other lane & have a look around... at least it was in daylight so I saw it with plenty of time to slow right down.

How is Sam going? Is he back to eating ok?

Have you managed to email any of the opposition pollies yet?...

Hugs

Paws

[Matchy69]

Hi Hannah I was seeing how Sam is going now.I love seeing his wonderful photo of him.Pets are such a great comfort and amazing friendship through life.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna

Apologies I haven’t popped in for a bit. I’m thinking the library is open tomorrow yes? That will be nice.

Hows little Sam now? Recovered? Poor Stormy’s legs are no good at the moment. She really needs to swim, and the ocean looked so lovely today, but I imagine it’s not that warm yet.

hugs from us. Katy

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Hanna, Paws, Katy, Matchy and everyone..🤗..

I too am sorry I haven’t come to visit you much..I have been reading along and I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time with friends...

I hope your friend does manage to get to New Zealand soon...that is about the only place I’ve longed to visit for a long time....maybe one day I will...

Hanna....a true friend wouldn’t get jealous of you for forming a beautiful friendship with G...Hearing people can treat other people like that really is so sad...

I am not much good at giving suggestions about friendships...The only true friend I have is Betty*...anyone else I can’t get close to..for fear of abandonment or rejection....Always keep true to yourself Hanna and don’t change for anyone...your perfect the way you are...

Awe how cute seeing that Koala.I don’t think I’ve seen a real live one yet..if I did I’m sure I would have remembered..

Strange weather we’re having this spring...It’s hot here today...I decided to finish off the rest of my lawn today...was a bit sad because I had to go over the half I done before the rain....at least now it’s all done...

I hope Sam is recovering well...Poor little darling..it’s hurts when they are not well...I’m sorry your fur baby isn’t doing to good Katy....I hope she gets to have a swim soon....I wish my 2 fur girls liked the water...They run the other way when I have to bath them...yet if their is a muddy puddle of brown icky water..they will play in it...

I hope your all doing okay...and enjoying today the best you can....remember tomorrow is another day and good things can happen each day for us..,

My love, care and hugs...beautiful people..

Grandy..

[Hanna3]

Hi Matchy!

That's nice of you to come by! Sam's improving after a nasty bladder infection and he's a bit tired poor guy but otherwise OK I think. Pets are great aren't they?!

I was a bit sick myself this morning but just got back from a quick visit to the local op shop this afternoon as I'm desperate for some summer clothes but they've removed the chair in the change room due to covid so I've you have to take your shoes off and on it's exhausting!

How are you going these days Matchy? I hope things are going OK for you. 🙂

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy

That's OK you've had your own problems to deal with! It's nice of you to come by. It's so hot today I haven't got much energy. It feels like summer and I don't like the heat.

Yes I have nice friends in other places which is reassuring and I've known them for ages. It must be this place! I did meet my new neighbours yesterday over the fence, a young couple with a new baby boy who are renting the house where the rottweillers used to be. They seemed very friendly so that's good.

Yes I don't know why my friend is so angry about G and I. I think she doesn't like him because he's so shy. He can come across rude because he is so quiet but that's just his anxiety, he doesn't mean it, and if he feels people are judging him of course he gets worse. He just tries to avoid small talk.

I'm glad I have him to talk to each Thursday now as I can't seem to make any women friends here that's for sure!

I have been meaning to text my other teacher just to say hi, he teaches harp but he's been stuck in another LGA for months now due to lockdown.

How is your neighbour Mrs NSC going now Grandy? I hope she is behaving!!!

Hugs 🐑🐈🐥