Anyone had to spend days alone without anyone to talk to?

[Hanna3]

Hi all, apart from here and a brief visit to church last night (to make it feel Christmassy and to just be with people) I've had day after day for weeks now with nobody at all to talk to. This time of year especially it's really depressing. Old friends that live far away are gradually losing contact with me - I ring them but they don't ring me. I understand they're busy with their live elsewhere but still it's hard when you're lonely. I'm going to a Christmas Eve service at the local church tomorrow night to at least be with people for a little while... but otherwise all day I'm alone, just me and the dog. Sometimes I strike up a conversation on BB but then the other person disappears and that's the end of that...

How are people meant to cope with prolonged periods of social isolation? I read, I watch DVDs, normally I'd go for long walks with the dog but thick smoke from bushfires and intense hot weather have stopped that. I go to a café alone sometimes. Any ideas/help?

[Doolhof]

Hi Everybody,

Please excuse my general comment here to all. My mind is really tired and so am I. My body is telling me it is time for bed, but I don't want to be awake at 2.00 a.m.

Dogs of all kinds make me smile when I see how happy they look. Some little dogs do have a big attitude, a bit like a bantam rooster I saw once bossing around geese!

Hanna, hope you are able to sort out the parking fine! Also hope you enjoy the book club.

A family member doesn't like talking on the phone, doesn't really enjoy texting either so when they do communicate in someway it is very special! Guess some people have anxiety and other issues.

Some places are getting much needed rain. Our region seems to miss out and we desperately need rain like so many areas. We have trees dying so I might try to water them somehow.

Cheers to you all from Dools

[Hanna3]

Hi Dools, hope you manage to get a decent night's sleep. We have trees dying everywhere here too and desperately needed more rain.

I like the sound of that bantam hen - a hen with attitude! Geese can be pretty scary too. Brave chicken!

Take care, hugs from us here

[Doolhof]

Hi Hanna and All,

I haven't slept well for years, I have tried so many different ways to get a good night's sleep, pills and potions and nothing seems to work. I always feel so tired and exhausted. Oh well. That is how it is I suppose.

I'm working both days of the weekend so hope to do a little watering this morning and again this evening. We have a few cooler days but no rain on the horizon. We are fortunate we can still water at all! I save water in the house as well when doing the dishes and washing my hands into a bucket in the laundry, that water goes on plants out the back door.

I've just started reading a book about a group of people somewhere in Australia who have decided to live out in the bush for a year.

With all these fires, it would be interesting to see how many dwellings and people are discovered living off the grid, people who have tried to escape society or who have been left behind.

My father was a volunteer fire fighter for decades, he would tell us of all kinds of things they would find in fire zones.

Hope you all have an okay kind of a day.

Cheers from Dools

[Hanna3]

Hi Dools,

I've always been a poor sleeper and it gets worse as you get older. Interestingly it's often inherited - my father had terrible problems getting to sleep, so I wonder if either of your parents had/have the problem?

I play music quietly in the bedroom I find that can help but I have to take sleeping tablets and often they don't work. It seems to be one of those things you're just stuck with, but darn annoying when you're tired and want to sleep and can't!

I sometimes fantasy about living off the grid somewhere, but then things like these bushfires hit and what are your chances? And how to you start again?

Where I lived in Small Coastal Town there was a woman who chose to live in the bush on the nearby mountain, I once or twice saw her paddle her canoe into town for supplies. I can understand it, some people need to be alone.

Your father must have had some interesting stories I'd love to hear them... good to hear from you. Cheers.

[Lady_Nova]

I am not sure about off grid, but I would love to live somewhere less peoply

[Hanna3]

Me too Lady Nova - this town is getting too big and busy - traffic and parking a bit of a nightmare. I'd like somewhere quieter... more relaxing. I get stressed driving around here!

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna

How are you going with the changes to your meds? You sounded like you might be not so good, in the BB cafe thread, so thought I'd check in here and say I'm thinking of you. You haven't had much luck with the gp's there. I remember when I had to see a different gp from my usual, to get another script for a codeine based product after the changes came in, and he made me feel like a junkie. He was incredibly rude. I tried to explain that my regular gp had recommended the pain meds in the first place for my migraines, and that they worked for me, and it was just that she wasn't available to see. I was so upset. I told my regular gp the next time I saw her and she replied that it was ridiculous that some gp's are against medications that patients themselves find helpful. A good gp really is a godsend!

You mentioned The Tunnel in one of your posts too. I've also seen and really enjoyed that one. I think I've run out of scandi noir series to watch unfortunately. They are my firm favourite. I did see mention of a recent release book in the genre, on facebook, so I'll keep my eye out for that. Last night I decided to watch the original Jurassic Park, just for some easy watching.

Are you still staying at your friend's place in the aircon? It's a lovely breezy 28 degrees here today. I went to the park with my brother and my nephew this morning, and my nephew insisted I have a few turns on the flying fox. It was quite fun actually. What are you and lovely Sam up to? Thinking of you both, Katy 🙂

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy! Lovely to hear from you!

It's so hard to find a good GP these days isn't it? I can imagine the trouble you had with the codeine med - I also have to take a codeine based med sometimes and you'd think I was out selling the stuff honestly from the reaction of the GPs here. I'm still on my full pain meds but as soon as I run out she's put me on half, I can imagine I will be back in agony. Found a guy here who sounded like a good GP, was voted best GP in the state, mature age, when I went to the website it says he's off on extended leave, so there goes that idea...

I've been really lonely today. Kept wishing I had someone to talk to but there wasn't anyone. My friend is back tomorrow, when she left it turned cool and it's been pleasantly cool ever since, from tomorrow on it's meant to get very hot again and she'll be back! Talk about bad timing, just when I could use the aircon. I haven't needed it this week! I've only spent a bit of time there as it's easier here with my things around me - it was the aircon in hot weather I needed! My only other friend here has had her mother staying from the city for the last week and is now going to the city for the next couple of weeks, so no company there.

I texted an old friend in the city this afternoon and said I wished I wasn't so alone here and she just texted back about the weather. What is it about telling someone you're lonely that has the same effect as telling them you've got an infectious disease???!!! She has a lot of family around her, I wonder if it's because they don't even understand what it's like?

I do wish I had SOME family - a brother or niece - but unfortunately I don't have contact with any of them or know where they are, which makes me feel even more alone. I really do depend on Sam which is probably obvious by now!

The dept of housing did an inspection here on 29 November, shortly after I moved in, and now they've written they're doing another one on 30th January, which is only two months apart. I'm going to ring them and ask why, it feels very intrusive and I have to wait in for most of the day... they didn't find anything wrong before so I don't know why they are doing this. I detest inspections they intrude on my privacy and I get very anxious.

I'll watch something pleasant tonight on TV, Jurassic Park was a good idea! Sorry to sound a bit low tonight, lovely to hear from you. Thanks for posting! Hugs from Sam.

[Paw Prints]

Hello Hanna,

What is it about telling someone you're lonely that has the same effect as telling them you've got an infectious disease???!!! or like saying you have mental health issues!!... I really don't know... is it they can't empathise?... do they think it's catching?... is it fear?... all of the above?... or is it that there is no quick fix so there is no simple response? Well there is a simple response... to simply be a friend & be there to talk about anything & everything.

The only times I have ever truly felt lonely have been when I've been in a group of people, like at a party. I never feel lonely when I'm at home alone as long as I have a 4 legged companion roaming the house.

I agree about the inspections being too close. You're not upsetting the neighbours by throwing wild parties or anything that would warrant them needing to keep a close eye.

I broke a back molar yesterday while eating a sandwich of all things. So now I have very sharp edges which are pressing into my cheek & the side of my tongue. It's hurting to eat, drink & talk. So which is the greater... the pain I'm in or my fear of dentists? Right now pain trumps fear, so I will be ringing one tomorrow.

Pats to Sam

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws! Gosh I'm sorry to hear about your tooth, ouch that must hurt! Yes I don't know anyone who likes going to the dentist but at times like this you definitely need to. Poor you! Let me know how you get on...

Yes I've felt like that at parties/in groups of people too - I'm too introvert, I can't do small talk. The last party I went to was in Small Coastal Town for a choir I was in there - I'm always stuck on my own in groups like that - as soon as possible I slipped out the door and drove home with a feeling of great relief to be out of there! I vowed I simply wouldn't ever go to another party.

I think I'm thoroughly homesick more than just lonely. I just miss where I came from that's my problem. But I don't understand why people can't chat for a minute or just at least text back when I text that I'm very alone... I just keep wishing I was sitting at my favourite quiet little café by the water, with Sam, reading a book. I think I find it stressful here and I'm missing the peace and quiet....

Apparently the tenants who were here before me (I'm in public housing) were absolutely terrible. I can see where they've had to patch the walls because they smashed them. When I arrived the neighbours didn't speak for a couple of weeks - then the guy next door came by with a bottle of wine for me and said how relieved he was they had a quiet neighbour and told me how terrible it had been living next to screaming domestic fights etc etc for years... then the other neighbours gradually said hello and said how terrible it had been and how relieved they were to have a quiet woman neighbour with a small dog...

So then I realised they hadn't spoken to me because they were waiting for fights/screaming etc to happen but it was just me and Sam and then they were so relieved... not that they've spoken to me since, nobody here seems to mix - but I'm very quiet and Sam is too. So yes I don't understand about the inspections so I'm going to phone tomorrow and find out why, but even that makes me anxious.

I hope you can get to a dentist tomorrow that must be painful. Going to the dentist is yuk so I'll be thinking of you. I hope you can post tomorrow and let me know how you got on. Take care Paws!