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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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sugarglider new poster - feeling depressed - again - help get my head straight
  • replies: 8

Hi - I have spent the day feeling very sad and crying and eating ice cream to feel better. My housemate is moving out after 3+ years here - on great terms - just time for her get on with her life somewhere else. I will miss her and her arrival and pr... View more

Hi - I have spent the day feeling very sad and crying and eating ice cream to feel better. My housemate is moving out after 3+ years here - on great terms - just time for her get on with her life somewhere else. I will miss her and her arrival and presence has been very important for me. She moved in 3 months after my husband of 20 years surprisingly abandoned me (no warning, just "i'm off" and literally walked off not to be seen / heard from again/ refusing to talk). I was in the grieving cycle and she moved in. A lovely role model of working hard, fit and healthy, nicely groomed and dressed etc. Shared life stories, shared meals, shared our lives for 3 years. I described her as Mary Poppins. It is totally normal to feel sad about such a situation. Although it triggers all the life / family issues. I have had several bouts of clinical depression in my life, grew up with a mother with schizophrenia, my father has admitted that they didn't have the resources to look after me and they thought I was smart, so they left me to my own devices without any guidance. abusive, jealous older sister with whom I now do not have a relationship. She was the one who constantly criticised everything / degraded / minimised everything - told me I was wrong. Still does now. I have read ALL of the books. years of therapy. been on anti-depressants. I know about neurology, exercise, diet, meditation, psychology. and here I am again. 54. alone. the pandemic put my job at threat and cut my pay by 50%. after my divorce cost $ and left me with a mortgage. Can't afford retirement. I feel tired, tense, nothing is good enough, no matter what I try - no nice endings so why start, .... all those things so I came here - to try and help myself. I intellectually know that I am not being abandoned again. I'm not even sure what I am asking here? How do I help my neurology to stop freaking out with the old childhood beliefs and act like the world is coming to an end again? I so tired of living 50 years in this space.

Cavan Alone, lost and endless emptiness
  • replies: 2

Hello i haven’t posted before and don’t know if this is the right online forum to share these thoughts and feelings... so apologies in advance if I should be on another one! i was married for 11 years to a wonderful man and have two beautiful childre... View more

Hello i haven’t posted before and don’t know if this is the right online forum to share these thoughts and feelings... so apologies in advance if I should be on another one! i was married for 11 years to a wonderful man and have two beautiful children. We recently separated. It was my decision in the end but in reality I feel he stopped loving me long before that. I developed post natal depression after the birth of my first child. And depression has been my constant companion ever since. I take medication. Which sometimes works ie I don’t feel rock bottom and other times I wonder if I’m on a plesibo. I have lived alone now for 9 months and have shared cared of our children. I work in a highly stressful job which consumes at least 50 hours of actual work and same again in stress and mental gymnastics. I have complicated work relationships with my work colleagues - due mostly I think if I’m being honest to my constant mood swings. I take my loneliness, disappointment and anger out on them. Which I get angry with myself for. Had one such week last week and Friday was the worst where I left the office in tears. then a full melt down about all the things in my life that were wrong or missing. I don’t have many friends. Over the years they have all withdrawn and pulled away. Most recently two of the friendships I valued the most cut me off. When I don’t have the kids I can go from Friday to Monday not talking to another person. Locked in my head. And while my work is so intense that I crave rest and downtime when I get it it just feels like an endless gaping hole. I started seeing someone that I fell hard for during the breakup of my marriage. His marriage broke up too. Long story but it’s been complicated. We broke up 6 months after it started cause he just didn’t want a relationship (or one with me I don’t know...). Since then because we’ve been friends we’ve drifted into this friends and sex thing. It sounds superficial maybe but it’s not. There are real feelings. He says he “doesn’t want to raise my expectations” whenever I bring up a possible future. I see him once a fortnight and it’s all he wants. I tried online dating. But it ended in a situation I don’t really want to say but it left me feeling shame and self loathing. im so incredibly lonely and so empty. I don’t know how to get out of this hole. I’m going back to my doctor cause maybe i need medication reviewed. I don’t have a question. Wanted to know people are out there. And I’m not alone

daniels87 Not sure what to say
  • replies: 8

Hi Guys i’m not to sure what I’m looking for here maybe just to get some validation that what I’m feeling is normal over the past year I have been feeling very down and had thoughts that there is no point living anymore. Everything started to slowly ... View more

Hi Guys i’m not to sure what I’m looking for here maybe just to get some validation that what I’m feeling is normal over the past year I have been feeling very down and had thoughts that there is no point living anymore. Everything started to slowly return to normal until o had a car accident, not my fault someone came out right infront of me. Long story short my car was written off. Ever since I have suffered strange feelings like nightmares, inability to sleep, eat & feeling restless and getting angry easily people have told me I’m suffering from PTSD but I’ve never had that before so I’m not sure if that’s what I’m feeling. The horrible thoughts are returning and I’m feeling very low again Hoping some people can maybe point me in the right direction as to how to try and get through this thanks

anonymous24 I feel so alone
  • replies: 2

I’ve never posted anywhere like this at all, but it’s gotten to the point where I genuinely feel I have no one else to talk to. I’ve always been too embarrassed to open up to anyone about my mental health and I struggled to even admit it to myself, I... View more

I’ve never posted anywhere like this at all, but it’s gotten to the point where I genuinely feel I have no one else to talk to. I’ve always been too embarrassed to open up to anyone about my mental health and I struggled to even admit it to myself, I guess because I’m scared people will see me differently. Idk what I’m expecting from this, or if anyone will see this or reply, but I’m just going to write out what I’m struggling with because I don’t know what else to do. I think my ‘depression’ (I’m not diagnosed or anything but idk what else to call it) started after my parents split up. My Dad was emotionally abusive and borderline physical. About a year after the messy, contested, and honestly traumatic divorce, dad repartnered and moved in with his new gf after knowing her for about 2 months and without even introducing her to me, or my little brother or sister. Ive tried to maintain my relationship with my dad even tho I’m the only one who makes the effort and despite having to live with her as a consequence, making that so emotionally straining for me. She yelled at me once when she overheard a conversation between my dad and I about how I was uncomfortable having to live with her, and dad didn’t stand up for me, and I haven’t gone back to their house since. He hasn’t tried to get in contact with me since then. It feels like he’s choosing his new girlfriend over me, his daughter. That moment broke my heart, and he doesn’t seem to care. I also have literally one close friend. One of my best friends of over 10 years has chosen to cut me off, and my best friend of the past 3 years has decided it would ‘be best if we didn’t see each other one on one.’ These 2 girls have formed a group with a few other girls from my year level that really don’t like me, and it feels like I’m being cut off from my best friends and excluded from a friendship group at the same time. As a result I’m basically completely alone and have no friends. I have basically no one, but the one best friend I do have also happens to be my ex, who I’ve recently fallen back in love with. I’m so dependant on him for my happiness and it’s so messed up bc no one deserves that. I’m trying to get over him bc he’s made it clear he’s fully over me but how am I supposed to get over someone when they’re the only person I’m spending my time with? Idk there’s so much more but there’s a character limit and I think I’ve already passed it. Please help me I don’t know what the point is anymore.

Shamie Alone
  • replies: 9

I would like first to say hello to everyone, hope you are all safe. I am alone. I have no family, nor any friends. Anxiety and depression are severe and make it difficult to relate to anyone. Whilst relief teaching I was able to cope with being alone... View more

I would like first to say hello to everyone, hope you are all safe. I am alone. I have no family, nor any friends. Anxiety and depression are severe and make it difficult to relate to anyone. Whilst relief teaching I was able to cope with being alone as the interaction was enough. I am not able to do that anymore with the present crisis so I am constantly at home. My living situation is unpleasant and adds to the isolation. I have tried many things over the years, from psychiatrists, psychologists, men's groups, therapy groups and more. All have been failures for me. I do not relate well to others as I feel judged always. I know this is not always the case, however, it is real all to often. I am safer alone, but not from myself. I do wish that I could relate to someone. I have come close to deleting this post. Just lonely.

Georgia04 Struggling
  • replies: 3

Hi I am a new member looking for support because I am really struggling at the moment. I feel heavy all the time and I'm getting really tired of being tired. I can't find anything to make me happy and it always feels like I'm watching myself through ... View more

Hi I am a new member looking for support because I am really struggling at the moment. I feel heavy all the time and I'm getting really tired of being tired. I can't find anything to make me happy and it always feels like I'm watching myself through a movie screen. How are you coping with your depressive moods because I'm running out of ideas. Every single day is a complete battle with myself to be happy and fun around my peers and friends but I am getting so tired. I'm young and I just want to start living my life. I feel like I'm walking up a hill and every time I think I'm at the top, there's more to climb. Please share your experiences. Thanks for reading, Ruby

Joy1 Just started taking a new antidepressant and its making me feel worse.
  • replies: 3

Hi, I am new to this forum and new to depression. I was recently diagnosed with depression. It has been an extremely confusing journey for me, I didn't and still don't know if I am depressed or just a horrible person. To most I am bubbly and happy an... View more

Hi, I am new to this forum and new to depression. I was recently diagnosed with depression. It has been an extremely confusing journey for me, I didn't and still don't know if I am depressed or just a horrible person. To most I am bubbly and happy and I have no idea how I got to this point, I am booked in to see my GP about my care plan and seek counselling to get to the bottom of it. In the past I have tried with counsellors but flake out after a few sessions as I felt like it wasn't helping me, but I guess that's probably part of my problem. I noticed a change in my moods and tirdeness about 2 years ago and was diagnosed with Hashimoto's (slow thyroid) with no other usual symptoms other than being exhausted all the time. About 2-3 weeks ago I was referred to a psychiatrist and prescribed an antidepressant. Since starting the medication (yes I am aware of the side effects that may make you feel worse) I have spiralled completely. I have one good day to two really awful days. I mostly snap irrationally and rage at very small decisions or something my partner has asked, which I don't usually do to this extent and I can't calm myself down. I take it out on my partner and scream at him that I hate him and I don't care about him or the kids, which is a complete lie. He can't take it anymore and has taken me to hospital twice this week. He is sick of me and I know this is taking its toll on his wellbeing. What's worse is that I cannot explain to him or apologise afterwards and my 'sorrys' are falling on dead ears and are never good enough, I don't blame him though. He filmed me raging out and having a breakdown which set me off completely but he said its for his own safety and to show me later on how bad I really am. I haven't been physical but I have been breaking things. I can't see me getting better and I feel like I am about to lose everything. Has anyone experienced anything like this and how did you push through? Thank you.

fred2018 checking in
  • replies: 3

Hi guys, going through a pretty dodgy patch mental health wise, so very irritable at people, at problems, today it was at myself, I think really alot of it is my mood but I take some of the responsibility. But yeah hoping the next few months pick up ... View more

Hi guys, going through a pretty dodgy patch mental health wise, so very irritable at people, at problems, today it was at myself, I think really alot of it is my mood but I take some of the responsibility. But yeah hoping the next few months pick up because things havn't felt too pretty. I'm gonna try and keep things basic, go to bed at set times, live a more ordered life, I think the problem with my body is stress and from what I know cortisol with people with mood disorders, you have to keep it in check. I've been between work which isn't great for mental health as many people know but I've been trying to get something through a job agency that is manageable, that has been a bit tricky judging my own capabilities , anyways there are a few good opportunities so hopefully I can sort that soon. Anyways all the best to everyone

THP71 My story of Depression and Anger.
  • replies: 5

Hi All i am new around this forum and the topic of depression, however I would like to firstly thank everyone in the community for all the info available it has helped me understand and cope with my situation greatly. Secondly I would like to tell my... View more

Hi All i am new around this forum and the topic of depression, however I would like to firstly thank everyone in the community for all the info available it has helped me understand and cope with my situation greatly. Secondly I would like to tell my story.i have recently been to my GP (a big deal for me) because I felt very stressed and angry All the time. It has been affecting all aspects of my life. I have had several major issues happen in my personal and work life that have caused me to feel this way.i spoke to my doctor briefly about my issues and feelings, he has diagnosed me with depression and started me on anti-depressants. Before I went to the Doctor I did not think I had depression however now after being more informed and researching depression I do think I have some type of depression. I feel more angry and hopeless in my situation than sad though. I do have a lot of the symptoms of depression but am more angry than sad. I have not been happy for a long time. I felt better the first week after going and talking to the doctor about it and starting the Anti- depressants. I have not been sleeping properly for a long time now and have been smoking pot to help me relax take my mind of things and sleepThis was all OK or so I thought until I had a smoke last Sunday night after tea and went positive on a drug test at work 12 hrs later. I have been stood down for a week now waiting a decision to see if I keep my job. I will say that I have never been to work stoned, don't smoke before or at work. Anyway this has had a big impact on my mental well being.i have been a long term user of pot and now I do wonder if this has caused some of my problems, anyway I have now stopped.i am going back to my GP this week and will discuss the smoking pot, also a follow up on the anti-depressant, which I don't think are working yet. He has advised seeing a physiologist which I think I will now as I feel I need to talk to someone about my situation and feelings. I think this will help.This has all been a big deal for me I have never had much to do with depression or mental illness. Like I said this site has helped me a heap as I feel a bit alone with this. I told work I started taking Anti-depressants but feel that they don't understand my situation at all and now testing positive for pot has just made it all worse. Anyway I just wanted to tell my story, vent a little and say thanks to everyone for understanding and helping in this community. i do feel better now I have talked about and addressed my issues. Still feel I have a long way to go but do feel I can and will get better. What I have learned is that there are all sorts or depression and guess I just need to work through this with the help of others. I think I may have some anger issues as well. Would appreciate any feed back from others as reading about people's situations and reading people's comments has made me understand and feel a lot better.

IPlay Why depressed people sleep so much / mood journals
  • replies: 6

Because you can't be sad when you're asleep. I've been keeping a mood journal where I rate my mood out of 10 each day for both morning and night. I realise I've cheated the system when I get up at 10 or 11am. On mood journals themselves I have found ... View more

Because you can't be sad when you're asleep. I've been keeping a mood journal where I rate my mood out of 10 each day for both morning and night. I realise I've cheated the system when I get up at 10 or 11am. On mood journals themselves I have found it to be a good indicator over time to help understand your individual patterns. It is good for personal use but would be cautious if presenting it to a professional or another person as the scales are completely subjective. I've been trying to find a comparison of 0-10 daily mood charts of a person with and a person without depression but since a mood rating is so subjective it's hard to draw comparisons. What I mean by subjective is that a 5 for me means - a non-mood, blank face feeling, absents of happy or sad feelings/thoughts, no intrusive thoughts, and sometimes it means I just slept through most of the morning. Whereas, and I speculate, someone without depression might place a 5 as meaning - content, flat, okay. A better example might be that someone with depressions reasons for rating between 0-5 includes suicidal thoughts or even attempts whereas a non-depressed person it does not. My average for this month is 6. Max 8. Min 0. - My 8's would be very good you would think, which they are... compared to my usual mood. - Brief moments of a smile, singing in he kitchen, dancing with my dog. But an 8 I have realised is still just a glimpse of my old self before depression. The 0 was that one night I got drunk and had heavy intrusive thoughts and crying almost to the point of action. What's your experience with mood journals if you keep one, or your thoughts on it even if you don't? What's your thoughts on sleep?

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