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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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How_To_Live_This_Life I am tired, I need help....
  • replies: 3

I am tired, i need some advice on how i can better live this life. For the longest time, I've been trying to live a straight life. But I know i'm not straight, i get attracted to the same sex but I'm trying my best to fight it. Almost all my relation... View more

I am tired, i need some advice on how i can better live this life. For the longest time, I've been trying to live a straight life. But I know i'm not straight, i get attracted to the same sex but I'm trying my best to fight it. Almost all my relationships were with a female, the only time i got to be with a guy was back in the university, never really lasted long. I was abused when i was a child which is probably why I hate being gay or bi or whatever i am called (i'm so lost that i cant even properly identify myself). I feel like life robbed me of the chance to live a normal life because of that abuse and so I resorted to trying to deny my true nature. But I am already getting consumed by the depression, by the loneliness, by not having a clear direction in life. I feel that my life is just wasting away. There's this big void in me that keeps getting bigger and bigger. I am so scared of what the future holds. Please help me....

hiiamsam I tried
  • replies: 2

I tried to eat healthy, I tried exercising, I tried meditation, I tried yoga, I tried listening to music, I tried to brush my teeth every night, I tried to get a good night sleep, I tried to stay away from alcohol and gambling, I tried to be a good s... View more

I tried to eat healthy, I tried exercising, I tried meditation, I tried yoga, I tried listening to music, I tried to brush my teeth every night, I tried to get a good night sleep, I tried to stay away from alcohol and gambling, I tried to be a good son, brother and friend, I tried to be happy. I tried speaking to you, I tried speaking to a professional, I tried everything you said to be happy, now I am tired of trying.

jonny09 I am feeling Very Lonely in Life
  • replies: 3

I am a solo entrepreneur. I work in front of my computer, i don't have any employee or team member, i work alone. the thing is that, i find it very difficult to make friends. I am an introvert, so, i find it difficult to walk to a stranger and start ... View more

I am a solo entrepreneur. I work in front of my computer, i don't have any employee or team member, i work alone. the thing is that, i find it very difficult to make friends. I am an introvert, so, i find it difficult to walk to a stranger and start a conversation. Many times when other people have fun and talk in groups, i get jealous. I always feel, why can't i have that fun. Reason for loneliness is that i have very few friends. I have noticed that, friends is someone who has same interests and liking. I am someone who does (online marketing by profession), and i get very intrigued when someone talks about my field or job. But on the other hand, i find it very difficult to make normal conversation with people. Most of the time, i am not confident and not interested in the topic. And i find it very suffocating and awkward when i try to act as an extrovert. Because it doesn't matches my mannerism and personality. Due to my personality, i attract only 1% of the crowd. 90% of the crowd is more attracted towards an extrovert and socially confident people. So, shud i change my personality in order to be acceptable by majority of the crowd? Or shud i be myself and try to find good friends in that 1% crowd. And not having many friends does feel pretty lonely and sad.

Justin95 Will I ever find love
  • replies: 2

I feel depressed and hopeless. I’m 22 and single. I’m a fairly good looking young man but I think I’m missing something. I’ve been reject 5 times by directly asking girls out, mostly are strangers. I’m holding on to a crush I had 5 years ago, I’m sti... View more

I feel depressed and hopeless. I’m 22 and single. I’m a fairly good looking young man but I think I’m missing something. I’ve been reject 5 times by directly asking girls out, mostly are strangers. I’m holding on to a crush I had 5 years ago, I’m still interested in her but I don’t know if she feels the same way, and I don’t know where she is now. Maybe some stalking in my part. At the moment I’m unemployed and depressed. I don’t know if I will end up married or not, or married to someone ugly. It’s natural for me to have some standards. Since I’m handsome I want someone beautiful. I’ve been battling anxiety at the moment so it’s harder for me when it comes to dating. I don’t think woman wants men with social anxiety. Right now I feel depressed and I’m binge watching SPONGEBOB. How do you think I can fix myself.

jonny09 I am feeling Very Lonely in Life
  • replies: 4

I am a solo entrepreneur. I work in front of my computer, i don't have any employee or team member, i work alone. the thing is that, i find it very difficult to make friends. I am an introvert, so, i find it difficult to walk to a stranger and start ... View more

I am a solo entrepreneur. I work in front of my computer, i don't have any employee or team member, i work alone. the thing is that, i find it very difficult to make friends. I am an introvert, so, i find it difficult to walk to a stranger and start a conversation. Many times when other people have fun and talk in groups, i get jealous. I always feel, why can't i have that fun. Reason for loneliness is that i have very few friends. I have noticed that, friends is someone who has same interests and liking. I am someone who does (online marketing by profession), and i get very intrigued when someone talks about my field or job. But on the other hand, i find it very difficult to make normal conversation with people. Most of the time, i am not confident and not interested in the topic. And i find it very suffocating and awkward when i try to act as an extrovert. Because it doesn't matches my mannerism and personality. Due to my personality, i attract only 1% of the crowd. 90% of the crowd is more attracted towards an extrovert and socially confident people. So, shud i change my personality in order to be acceptable by majority of the crowd? Or shud i be myself and try to find good friends in that 1% crowd. And not having many friends does feel pretty lonely and sad.

Merced Attachment and Avoidance
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Haven’t posted on here in about 4 years. Does anyone else struggle with attachment but at the same time have an avoidant personality? My depression is a little all over the place at the moment and I’m trying to collect my thoughts and ro... View more

Hi everyone, Haven’t posted on here in about 4 years. Does anyone else struggle with attachment but at the same time have an avoidant personality? My depression is a little all over the place at the moment and I’m trying to collect my thoughts and roll with the punches. Lately with relationships I’m either two ends of the spectrum - seriously attached or seriously avoidant. I’ve just ended a friendship of over 10 years and have DIPPED, not really allowing much of a conversation for it because it would honestly drain me. This is where I feel I’m being avoidant, anytime anyone tries to talk to me about it or ask I change the subject or zone out completely. I’m okay with that for now. My problem is my attachment issues and my stupid little obsessions I get with anyone I’m intimate with or share some time with. I find myself getting really invested over someone I’ve only just met, thinking about them 24/7, looking at their socials, replaying whatever moment we had in my head on a loop. Internally agonising over a stranger. I don’t go crazy in person and spam them with messages or anything, it’s all just going on in my head. I guess I can pin this down to loneliness and craving something more but it just sucks. I get to a place where I’m feeling independent and only concerned about myself, but then someone catches me off guard and I go down a spiral. I’m perfectly content with every aspect of my life apart from my social life - both friends and more. I’d say at the moment I don’t really have any friends outside of work, and I’ve never had a boyfriend or relationship, and that’s why I’m so quick to latch on. If you personally deal with something similar, how do you get passed it? How do you just shut up inside your head and move on? I’d love some advice.

kennedy_c Im a bit confused and worried
  • replies: 8

Hi, we have been in lockdown for around 12 weeks. Just the last week or so I've had anxiety attacks that have coincided with feelings of depression. It largely happens at night. However, some sort of relief and happiness has come from tv shows which ... View more

Hi, we have been in lockdown for around 12 weeks. Just the last week or so I've had anxiety attacks that have coincided with feelings of depression. It largely happens at night. However, some sort of relief and happiness has come from tv shows which have helped me get through it. I also saw my friends for the first time today in a while and I still felt a little bit of that same depression which worries me. When I go through these depressing stages at night nothing I can think of makes me feel happy, I try to go on my laptop and escape however that doesn't seem to work sometimes. Because of these empty and helpless feelings, I get a large amount of anxiety which further makes me feel worse. It does however seem to subside after an hour or 30 min, then I start to feel a bit happier. I have never seen a therapist or anything I'm just confused right now and I don't know if it's the lockdown that's causing it and if it will get better. Thanks a lot.

Lost_in_space_ ADHD + Chronic Pain, now Depressed.
  • replies: 1

Hi new on here. Am 63. 56/57 i was diagnosed with ADHD. Was an enlightening moment for me. I been different from as far back as i can remember. But finding out helped me a lot. I have put my own defence mechanisms in over time. Held back at school, d... View more

Hi new on here. Am 63. 56/57 i was diagnosed with ADHD. Was an enlightening moment for me. I been different from as far back as i can remember. But finding out helped me a lot. I have put my own defence mechanisms in over time. Held back at school, dropped out soon as i could. All i wanted to do was work. So i got a mechanical trade, passing paper exams, couple of bites to drag through. So my ADHD i am happy with. I have purpose and drive when i have a goal. Once attained i lose interest. I have achieved a lot in life and my bucket list is empty. There are no more challenges for me. 30 yrs ago i broke an ankle very bad. 3 years ago i broke it again. This time pain was beyond. I stayed doing what t i was busy with for 3 weeks. Literally just cried for 3 weeks but my head would not let me give up. 3 months later i was assessed with chronic pain, irreparable nerve damage. So stewed my head with medications, these turned my brain to fluid. I got suicidal, hallucinations and cried from pain. A year after i decided to stop, had two failed ops. Would not die a drug addict. So for two years i fought with everything. Used to cry walking, i walked looking at the ground. Now i got the pain down so i can work, until i upset the applecart. But i am sore and grumpy. Short with all. My doc put up with a lot. Tells me i am depressed, no frustrated! So couple months ago i was looking at ADHD and it leads to depression. So then i looked at depression. I tick a lot of boxes.I am empty inside, hopeless, worthless, useless, zero value. When asked by a friend and i am honest, look inside my vacuum and just cry. When i go to the doc’s i feel like i am begging and i cry. I had a full go a while ago to put myself to sleep. Wasn’t to be. Now i am in a worse place because i have to face those those i affected. Am now on anti depressants. Not happy but i will give it a go. I walk as little as possible. Cannot do physical. I have a better half that still puts up with me, why i will never know? so i am after some building blocks to start on value. I am really a loner. Do not need a lot of friends but have good value ones. I am difficult around people. Was as good as gold until the injury. Now i have to fight a bit more. I battle with being such a baby and useless. Understand pain and minimising it. But its the uselessness of me that i battle with. I want to be happy helpful me once more. lots of bits to fill in but there are the basics.

Cherry84 What’s wrong with me
  • replies: 3

I’ve been told I have untreated postnatal depression after having my 2 girls ages 2 and 3 (I have 2 older teenage boys as well) What does that mean?! I love my kids dearly and they have kept me alive and pushing on but I can’t stand home life, I woul... View more

I’ve been told I have untreated postnatal depression after having my 2 girls ages 2 and 3 (I have 2 older teenage boys as well) What does that mean?! I love my kids dearly and they have kept me alive and pushing on but I can’t stand home life, I would rather sit alone and speak to no one. I barely sleep and when it’s time to get up I would rather lie in bed. My work has taken a back seat and I am not motivated the way I used to be. I withdraw from people that want to talk especially my husband and I know he’s just trying to help. Any little disagreement or attitude from my sons I completely melt down, like I’m ready to run away. Matter of fact this weekend I did and here I am. I’ve spoken to the boys in the past about how I’m feeling and what’s happening , I thought they would care and try to help.. nope . I feel like I’ve completely failed as their mum and that I’ve raised what feels like such uncaring humans, now I feel like I’m failing my daughters to because I can’t get myself straight. I’ve failed as a wife to an amazing husband who is just trying to help and just all in all failing at life. I tried speaking to someone, I hated the way she spoke to me, the way we would speak normal and then when I spoke about wanting to disappear the time changes and I’m told to ‘just be kind to myself’ instantly I blocked everything she said out and started to lie for the remainder of our sessions about how well I’m doing. I’m good at this now, faking it, just seems the norm. It all comes in waves, sometimes I genuinely am feeling good! But I felt things building up and now I’m back to wanting to disappear or run away from everything and everyone. I feel like I don’t want anyone’s help because it all sounds the same, I’m not even sure what I want to hear!! I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do! Surely this can’t last forever. there’s so much more I could say but that will do for now.

Stardust535 Just a vent, or something
  • replies: 3

I'm not sure if this s the right place to do this but I just need to say some thing to someone and I dont have anywhere else. I tried diaries and stuff like that but they just make me feel sorta invisible. I'm just not doing ok today. I feel dysphori... View more

I'm not sure if this s the right place to do this but I just need to say some thing to someone and I dont have anywhere else. I tried diaries and stuff like that but they just make me feel sorta invisible. I'm just not doing ok today. I feel dysphoric and sick and sad. I keep trying to cry but I cant. To make it worse, it's my parents birthday today and I was supposed to make them something but evertime I tried before I couldn't start and I can't even make it out of bed today. I feel like I don't stop dissapointing them. They're a good parent, they just don't deserve me. So I'm sitting here and even being upright is making me nautious. I just want to curl away into a ball and to be forgotton, but I can't. I just feel so tired.

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