no sense of purpose and always slump

[Bodey294]

Hi There, 

i guess my depression is getting worse for me. without anxiety there is no depression and vise versa. both go hand in hand. I'm finding it extremely difficult openly talking to people and make friends. thats the anxiety and as a result depression has almost entirely consumed me. Im halfway through the first year of university and only made one "friend" more of an acquaintance. i literally avoid everyone else. It takes hours for me to get to sleep, sometimes not at all, i get up mostly in the afternoons from oversleeping and i find it hard concentrating in lectures. you know how they say that your most likely to grow up like your parents. both true and unfortunate. my father is a committed stoic pessimist in which case he avoids emotions so well but at the cost of literally looking like a oblivious warn out old man struggling to hold on. he has hobbies (laborious jobs: gardening, fixing up gutters and fences, that are not made for his physical stamina by the looks of it) but not many friends. he's too out of touch with the people around him. this has influenced me a lot. my feelings have been bottled up for too long and don't know how long i can keep going like this. as a kid i used to be care free but i guess relationship problems with my family and peers got in the way. 

[ChiefMoots]

Bodey - went through very similar experience early on at uni myself and was diagnosed with social phobia.  Where things changed was where I both asked for and offered help to those in my classes.  This pushed me to get to know people and in turn them knowing me.

You said yourself you used to be carefree so it's nothing to do with your parents - be the kid again.  When my depression hits from time to time, i try and think like a kid to work my way out of it.  Keep at it.

[Paul]

Hey Bodey

Awesome that you've opened the lid on that bottle and poured a little out on here. Keep doing that, it really helps.

There are some resources at the bottom of the page under "Get support". Have you thought of talking to your GP or finding another professional to help explain what's going on and find that kid again?

Whatever is causing these emotions whether it's a family trait or something else isn't so important right now. To feel so burdened and not be sure of how long you can cope with the emotions is pretty important.

I can relate to the anxiety and depression relationship - it's like they are ugly cousins and gang up on you, they also tend to make thinking clearly pretty difficult.

Please feel free to let us know any thoughts and feelings and consider going to see someone - even if it is to find out whether the emotions are a family thing or something else.

Take care, let us know what you find out if you decide to visit a professional or your GP.

Paul

[_NaturalTalent_]

Hey Bodey,

There's some awesome suggestions there, I just want to throw one more in:

Creative/Expressive Therapy

 Look into it! There's heaps to do and you can do it all alone. Some things even help bring out the kid in you the others are talking about.