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Sophie_M How are you feeling about the social media restrictions in Australia for under 16s?
  • replies: 14

Hey everyone With the upcoming Australian social media restriction for under 16-year-olds coming up we want to know what this means for you and maybe even the young people in your life. This conversation is a place for all of us to share how we are f... View more

Hey everyone With the upcoming Australian social media restriction for under 16-year-olds coming up we want to know what this means for you and maybe even the young people in your life. This conversation is a place for all of us to share how we are feeling and what we think the challenges and benefits might be for you or the wonderful young people in our community. Have you thought about how to stay connected with friends you’ve met online? Are you focused mostly on the positives, or the negatives? What do your parents think, and what could they do to support you? Importantly the Beyond Blue Forums are not impacted by these restrictions, we're here for anyone under 16. In short, from December 10 Social Media companies will need to ensure that only people over 16 actively engage with their platforms. There is a lot of information out there which can make it tricky to know what to expect on when it comes into effect. To learn more we think these are a helpful place to start eSafety commissioner + Headspace FAQs. We know this change will impact some more than others, QLife provide anonymous and free LGBTIQ+ support and 13YARN are here for all Aboriginal & Torres Strait Islander people. We want to hear your thoughts on how this might impact the mental health of under 16s in both a positive and negative way. The Beyond Blue Forums are a place for constructive and helpful conversation and the regular moderation rules apply which means we look forward to a kind and understanding discussion. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings Sophie M

BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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rabarbie Always overwhelmed
  • replies: 7

Hi everyone, this is my first post and the closest I can get to some form of help.. As of recently (the past 6 months), I have been extremely stressed/tired/anxious/overwhelmed - primarily from school. I have extremely high expectations of myself in ... View more

Hi everyone, this is my first post and the closest I can get to some form of help.. As of recently (the past 6 months), I have been extremely stressed/tired/anxious/overwhelmed - primarily from school. I have extremely high expectations of myself in achieving a 98 ish atar, but as of now things aren't exactly going as I hoped and some of my marks/ranks are subpar. Aside from that I'm having trouble starting anything from anxiety, and now i'm left with a few days before my assessment with almost no preparation. This isn't the reason I'm writing here though. All of this has been amplified by my parents that are constantly yelling, shouting, screaming at me, telling me how much they hate me, and how I'm useless, how I won't accomplish anything. They make no room to prioritise giving me some space, or listen on to my needs. No, infact they laugh and yell ay me when I cry, telling me its irrational. Now as a student who wants/almost needs to achieve a 98...I have so much, too much workload. But all this pressure is just getting to me. Its too much, so much. And I don't have time for a break, or my break ends up being waay too long you know. Getting any sort of counselling is also off the table.... bc parents. And overall, Im very uncomfortable talking about family to anyone I know who is close to me. Please, what should I do. I'm trying to be strong and balance all this pressure, overhwelming anxiety and stress whilst maintaining good grades and dealing with my parents but its...hard.

Sakina_ Loss of family members
  • replies: 5

I just need someone to talk to..anyone. If you're willing to listen please reply, it would mean a lot to me. This thread is for people dealing with loss. Stay safe. <3.

I just need someone to talk to..anyone. If you're willing to listen please reply, it would mean a lot to me. This thread is for people dealing with loss. Stay safe. <3.

Deltius Tips on turning jealousy and envy into motivation?
  • replies: 3

Hello there Beyondblue people, Sorry in advance if I have posted something of a similar topic before, my memory is not the greatest. Essentially I have this issue of getting envious/discouraged but the success of the people I know. The primary exampl... View more

Hello there Beyondblue people, Sorry in advance if I have posted something of a similar topic before, my memory is not the greatest. Essentially I have this issue of getting envious/discouraged but the success of the people I know. The primary example is about music and guitar. I found out tonight that my friend who is 4 years younger then me and has only being doing music for 3 years is already playing a lot of live stuff and everyone is loving her, she also sings plays uke and some keyboard, not to mention she has started composing/creating songs. I found out that she doesn't even know any theory or what she is playing yet she has progressed so far seemingly easily. I have started practising guitar daily about a month ago but have been playing since I was 16, now 21. Anyway hearing how she does all this without even knowing what she is playing and seemingly easily doing so many things is strangely discouraging for my own efforts. I've been trying to figure out how to turn that into inspiration/motivation instead of discouragement and making me feel like a failure and I am too old to ever do anything cool like be on stage.

Phenomenon_ Drifting through life & I dislike school
  • replies: 8

It’s hard to write this. It’s hard to word something that doesn’t make sense to myself. So I’ll quote lyrics from the song Zombie, by Day6. “I feel like I became a zombie Not alive, but I'm still walkin' … Tomorrow I know I'll be Just the same, you'l... View more

It’s hard to write this. It’s hard to word something that doesn’t make sense to myself. So I’ll quote lyrics from the song Zombie, by Day6. “I feel like I became a zombie Not alive, but I'm still walkin' … Tomorrow I know I'll be Just the same, you'll see me Wishing to stop and close my eyes” I often feel this way: trapped, a lot of the time because of schoolwork. To escape it all, I do whatever I can to avoid work, and have been doing this for years. I’ll browse the internet, youtube, check the fridge for the 5th time that hour, and so on. What makes me feel even worse is how I have other ambitions and goals, such as learning dances, learning lyrics to a song or read a book I’m interested in, but I seem to avoid those too, and again, just browse self care and philosophy videos for a bit, take hours to find an anime to watch, only to instead make Spotify playlists for the next 3 hours. It makes me wonder if I even want the things ‘I’m passionate about’. If yes, why is it so difficult to do them? And as a result of so much wasted time, my grades have been suffering. Some of my teachers treat me rudely and are much kinder to others. I do my best in class to understand concepts and I believe I am a good person! But I’m slow. It’ll take me days to understand things, but teachers expect homework due the next day. My homework is either half-heartedly done, or not done at all. I put the emphasis on UNDERSTANDING work, but still, I can’t do all of it some days too. From a teacher’s perspective, I must seem very lazy, but reading one page of a textbook is already a huge achievement for me. Everyone is different, yet we all conform to this ONE system. And it’s frustrating that I don’t seem to be in control of my time. I just want to lay down and stop caring. There’s so much to life besides school. But it feels like if you don’t do well in high school, you’re.. done for in life. If students could be willing and ABLE to do work, they would try! But how much motivation do you expect us to have when we are bombarded with 40 pages of work (literally my biology work this week for remote learning) and piled up work from the last few terms? I recognise there’s no time to stop and help everyone to gain develop study habits and that’s exactly the problem. Students who don’t know any better on how to fix their routines are just drifting through school, through life. The pressure + workload is too much.

Tamrby lockdown
  • replies: 2

help, for real. I said last year if I enter lockdown again I couldn't handle it as last year I was truly struggling like so badly and on top of that everyday I would cry over lockdown, either just from fear of missing out or stress from online learni... View more

help, for real. I said last year if I enter lockdown again I couldn't handle it as last year I was truly struggling like so badly and on top of that everyday I would cry over lockdown, either just from fear of missing out or stress from online learning, I don't want to go through that, I CANT go through that again. I have got better coping strategies now and am keeping in contact with friends to keep my mind off it, but thats not always a good thing. I just have a feeling that these feelings I have are building up. I try talking to friends but a lot of them aren't doing the greatest and the one I could talk to has no idea what its like I don't think, also I really like them and I don't want to make things awkward between us. I felt myself getting really anxious a few nights ago but a friend called me at that exact moment which was a really good distraction. Idk I just feel like I am not dealing with my feelings but rather pushing them to the side and distracting myself, I suppose its better than last year but I worry that one day soon I'll be back in that dark place that I was in last year. If anyone has anything to contribute it would be really good, thank you

t_mad Do I Drop Out?
  • replies: 6

I don't want to, but I feel like dropping out is my only option. I'm more than halfway through year 11 and really struggling with depression/anxiety. It has really impacted my school life and motivation. I have sought help from school resources (coun... View more

I don't want to, but I feel like dropping out is my only option. I'm more than halfway through year 11 and really struggling with depression/anxiety. It has really impacted my school life and motivation. I have sought help from school resources (counsellors/tutors), as well as doctors. The school has become more frustrated with me, as I have been failing to turn in assignments and attend school all together. I discussed options with the deputy and they kept bringing up pathways (as explained, would take 5 years to complete), repeating yr 11, TAFE as well as other alternatives to getting to Uni. The thing is, I don't have a problem directly tied to school. I've always loved it. There's just been a lot going on in my personal life that makes coping in general very difficult. Which is why my doctors recommended against these options, as I would be deprived of social interaction and mile stones that mean a lot to me (such as graduating with my friends)-missing out would possibly making my mental health status worse. There was no in between. So I kept going to school, attending even when I was sick, not sleeping, and over all not mentally okay. Because I needed my attendance up. I was told to "just show up and turn things in, even if they aren't 'good' year 11 isn't important." I've really been trying. My trying is getting out of bed and stepping into that school, that takes all my effort. I try not to have panic attacks in class. I feel like my try is not good enough to them though. I called in sick again today because I've been constantly breaking down over this. My parents said they copped a lot of heat for calling in since I've taken too many days off, the school said I should consider dropping out. Maybe I'm close minded and should embrace other options, it just seems like I'm always back to square one. I want to give up. But at the same time I don't. I really want to go to formal and graduate with my friends and have a send off to Uni. I don't know if my dreams are more important than my mental health though. I need some advice. Thanks for reading this long essay.

MrJ01 Compulsive Lying/Relationship issues
  • replies: 4

Hey everyone, this is my first post on beyondblue and I’m hoping this is the right category for me to post it in. Basically, the past 2 years I’ve developed a habit of lying a lot towards my girlfriend and hiding things, mostly out of shame of what I... View more

Hey everyone, this is my first post on beyondblue and I’m hoping this is the right category for me to post it in. Basically, the past 2 years I’ve developed a habit of lying a lot towards my girlfriend and hiding things, mostly out of shame of what I’ve done, or I’ve been scared to face the consequences because I don’t know how she will react and what would happen to our relationship. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for two years, since early 2019, on and off multiple times, and during this time I have lied a lot, and my actions and my lies have caused a lot of strain on her mental health and well-being and also our relationship in general. When we first started dating, the first month things were mostly fine but the night before our first break up, whilst she was at work I ended up cheating on her by txxxting and sending certain pictures to a female friend of mine, after it happened I felt horrible but I was too scared to tell her which looking back, I feel like a coward for. The morning after me and her broke up, mostly due to my guilt of what I had done and I wanted to just run away from what I did rather than face it. After we had broken up, I had gone and spent time with other new female friends (4 to be exact) and during that time me and my girlfriend (ex during this time) were also talking but as friends, and I ended up giving my ex a coldsore, I had no idea I was even carrying the herpes virus and I had even got tested after she got her coldsore and my tests came back negative. Anyways all of this led her to question me about my activities during our break up, and at first I only told her about one of the girls but hid the rest, and continued to see 1 of them during the rest of the break up. Eventually me and my ex got back together, and during this time I still hadn’t told her i cheated or about 3 of the other girls i spent time with during the break up, and i even kept one of them as a friend, at some point during our second stint at the relationship I ended up telling her about what I had done and that absolutely crushed her, which also led to our second break up and during that time, I saw a new female friend but instead of hiding it this time, i did tell my girl/ex about what happened. i’m running out of words to use but basically i would continue to lie a bit more and txxxt other girls, one being her best friend. during our break ups, but as time went on i would eventually tell her the truth more and more. part 2 will be in replies

Aliceb3 Feeling horrible.
  • replies: 1

Hi, I’ve never written something like this before and it scares me but I really need to get this off my chest. For the last few years, since I’ve started high school, I’ve begun feeling these weird waves of stress, sadness and especially loneliness. ... View more

Hi, I’ve never written something like this before and it scares me but I really need to get this off my chest. For the last few years, since I’ve started high school, I’ve begun feeling these weird waves of stress, sadness and especially loneliness. I have a lot of friends but I find myself feeling so lonely I sometimes feel sick in my stomach and my chest aches. I have a best friend who is like my sister, but I get stressed a lot that she will eventually leave me for someone better, and I often worry that she doesn’t like me anymore, although she reassures me that I’m being crazy. I often don’t want to tell her anything because I am worried about putting my problems on her, as I have done that in the past and I feel that it has taken a toll on her. I am always feeling stressed and I worry about anything and everything. I can hardly put it into words but sometimes my chest feels tight and I can’t sit still as if I am about to start a test or that something bad is about to happen to me, even when there’s nothing to be stressed about. I get angry very easily, and I am worried that I will say something horrible while angry to my friends. I can be very aggressive, although I have never ever (and never will) be physical, I have yelled at my friends before. Sometimes I just feel so stressed that I snap and I find it hard to control my temper. I have lots of wonderful friends and hobbies and a family I love, but I am feeling sad more and more as I get older. I get waves of sadness a lot and randomly start crying. People sometimes notice but I say that I’m just tired and although that is part of it I know that I am usually lying. I don’t use drugs or alcohol because I know that would make the problem worse for me, so instead I watch a lot of movies and write a lot to try and take my mind off everything at the moment. I am turning sixteen in just a couple weeks, and i am starting to feel like my life is pointless. I have a great home life but I’m desperate to leave my city and even my country. I feel like I need to start anew. I love my friends but I don’t feel like I fit in with most of them. I know I should probably talk to someone about these issues but I’m just too terrified. I’ve never been diagnosed with anything and I’m scared to talk to someone in case I am. Plus they would be a stranger, and that just makes me more nervous. I don’t know what to do anymore.

uggaholic Isn't it normal to not move out these days for under 30s?
  • replies: 2

So yesterday I freaked out over a situation (now no longer an issue), and ranted online elsewhere.. Situation was, my elderly auntie, who sadly lives in a share house, kind of asked my parents if she can move in with us (old house of 3+dog; low-middl... View more

So yesterday I freaked out over a situation (now no longer an issue), and ranted online elsewhere.. Situation was, my elderly auntie, who sadly lives in a share house, kind of asked my parents if she can move in with us (old house of 3+dog; low-middle income retired parents + dependent). I freaked out, was so upset, because I feel I mentally and physically cannot live with her, and i know my mum wouldn't be able to bear it. Ultimately if she were to move in, I would feel like I'm forced to move out. It would be such a let down on my dad's part. I'm in no mental space and financial position to move out, plus I have my dog. Her moving in would practically ruin my mum's quality of life, and if I move out my mum would be so lonely. But also, I'm overall so afraid of my financial situation - i dont have a job, degree, have some savings. But I'm happy and currently want to stay at home with my mum, try to figure myself out, whilst i don't need to worry about finances, I'm comfortable, my dog has a backyard. Heck my mum is the type of parent that doesnt even want her kids to leave! So yes, I am living off my parents, as I have since I was born on my online rant, this person commented that I am an entitled child to be living off my parents and being scared of losing financial security. And automatically, I thought they are wrong. I'm far from entitled (yes this is coming from myself but I'm really not...). How can someone's child move out if they are not ready? Why would I move out just to run out of savings and be forced to run back home? Becoming truly broke would break my mum's heart more than moving out. trying to forget this stranger's words. Do people really think this is entitlement? I know i am so privileged to be able to stay home and rely on my parents whilst I potentially earn enough money to fully support myself and them also. But does this mean I am being selfish? Aren't there so many people like me? Isn't this normal life? I am actually so afraid of becoming homeless - there are literally young people with their dogs in my suburb on the street sitting in front of supermarkets. It's heartbreaking, so yes I'll continue being safe at home because I can.. I even know a 30 year old couple who had to sell their newly built house and move back in with parents, because it was just too expensive.

tzU Having a tough time near HSC with my own thoughts
  • replies: 7

I've never been 'brave' enough I suppose you could say to come onto one of these sites, even though I'm confident this rut of a mindset I'm stuck in is eating me alive. I am approaching the conclusion of my senior highschool education with great pros... View more

I've never been 'brave' enough I suppose you could say to come onto one of these sites, even though I'm confident this rut of a mindset I'm stuck in is eating me alive. I am approaching the conclusion of my senior highschool education with great prospects! I am studying harder than most in my year, I have already lined up a uni course for 2022 and have a place in that course secured. These things are great but I often come to great clashes within myself about the worth of what I am doing now. I guess that is a bit vague but I mean to put it into perspective, I have never once went to a peer party or anything of the sort, I don't often hang out with friends due to geographical isolation and a lot of the time nowadays I don't even feel like caring for that kind of social interaction anymore. Then I come to internal conflict with that same socially neglectful mindset because I over think everything and I end up waking up 3-4 times every night. I guess it's just that the concept of 'right' and 'wrong' are really a common topic for my brain to pick, Am I right in putting the effort in academically for my future satisfaction if only to suffer the short term but regret filled depression of feeling not included in social events among my peers? It's tough when the environment I am in isn't filled with a plethora of academically minded people, but rather those who don't seem to have a great deal of thought towards their futures and instead would rather procrastinate or indulge in activites that may inhibit those people from leading fulfilling lives (I am trying to be very nonspecific since many of those people are friends of mine regardless of their decisions). To be honest after rereading what I had just typed previously it just seems like a meaningless trail of thought. I guess there is no harm in opening up a bit here without being specific, and I would never solely blame anyone of these experiences for the ways I might feel or act, but to be honest I have opened up to my older siblings about problems from my past that haunted me like witnessing domestic abuse several times and being in a family environment where drunken disputes where very common. Anyway, I've just always thought that these things have caused some sort of perpetual anxiety for myself. And more often then not, lately this stress from all this thinking is just killing me. But, if you have any advice or testimonials regarding your qualms with similar issues I would highly appreciate your input