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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Cherry13 Looking for some relationship advice...
  • replies: 4

I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask for this sort of advice but it would be really helpful to see what people think... I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for nearly six months and things have not been "smooth sailing". I never f... View more

I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask for this sort of advice but it would be really helpful to see what people think... I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for nearly six months and things have not been "smooth sailing". I never feel appreciated and he takes me and my kindness for granted. We have had a few conversations about how I feel and he has expressed how he can get into moods where he doesn't want to do anything in general and would also rather not speak/text me or even hang out. He believes that he is immature and unmotivated in life but doesn't want to lose me because he knows how great I am. It's important to note that we live 40 minutes from each other and we only see each other once a week (depending on if he's feeling motivated to see me), this means that calling and texting is vital for our relationship to stay connected, however, my boyfriend frequently complains that he's more of an 'in-person' kind of person (as in with interacting with another) and so, I find that he uses that as an excuse to not message me or call. It is very difficult to get him to come over to my house, he will always make excuses from the point of inviting him to the point of him showing up on my doorstep. I'm at a stage of defeat, we have promised ourselves that we will try again but all I see is myself putting in all the effort and him continuously making excuses and not treating me any different. This relationship affects my mental health a lot and it also causes me to fall behind in my job and now that I've begun a new course, I don't need more stress on my studies too. My boyfriend has a bad mentally about himself and I want to help him but he doesn't make it easy for me, I feel like the best thing to help us both is to break up but then I also think that we will be broken-hearted, which will still hurt our mentalities. Of course, we will heal from a broken heart and grow but can we also heal and grow within our relationship... He's expressed that he wants to fix and change things and so should I just see what happens (we do have plenty of time after all) or is this relationship not worth fixing?

hm_ I got a terrible test result and I am starting to doubt myself
  • replies: 6

I am in high school currently and I work hard to achieve good grades because it is really important to me to do well in school. I haven't gotten a bad mark at school ever until today. My teacher called out everyone scores except mine in front of the ... View more

I am in high school currently and I work hard to achieve good grades because it is really important to me to do well in school. I haven't gotten a bad mark at school ever until today. My teacher called out everyone scores except mine in front of the class so I went up to him and asked him what I had gotten, and he said i got 55%. I was in denial so i just looked at him shocked and said "oh," and walked away. My friends came up to me and asked me what i got and i just said "oh i did alright." when i got home, i started crying so hard to the point I couldnt breathe properly. I started doubting if I was smart or was I just talentless. I felt like my teacher thought I was stupid and i felt extremely sad and disappointed considering everyone else in my class got A's. i didnt understand what i did wrong as i did studied. my concentration has been a bit off lately but im not really sure why. anyways, i just feel like i cant give myself a break for anything i do wrong and i feel petrified to walk into class tomorrow with a smiling face and act like everything is fine because i feel like my teacher thinks im a bad student. i feel like im being a bit dramatic but i dont want to bury the way i feel because that will just make me doubt myself more.

keyboardcookie I'm starting to resent my bestfriend
  • replies: 6

For context, we've recently graduated highschool. Recently though, I feel like I'm starting to resent her. This has been a trend through alot of my close friendships, which usually end up in me pushing the other person away after a few years, after d... View more

For context, we've recently graduated highschool. Recently though, I feel like I'm starting to resent her. This has been a trend through alot of my close friendships, which usually end up in me pushing the other person away after a few years, after developing negative feelings towards them. She's my best friend, is nothing but kind, loving, and understanding towards me so it hurts me when I feel these negative feelings towards her. I can't help but also feel some envy towards her. Her family quite well-off financially, whilst I grew up lower class, as well as this, she's absolutely gorgeous and so kind - which are qualities I don't feel I exude, but have always wanted to. I don't want to feel envious, and try not to compare myself to her, or feel any resentment towards her, because I value our friendship so much. I think oftentimes this ends up in me trying to 'prove' to myself that I'm somehow better than her, even though I know our friendship isn't a competition. She'll sometimes do things mindlessly that hurt my feelings (i.e, responding to my exes if they try to spark up conversation with her and being friendly, staying acquaintances with people who she met through me, who have really hurt me in the past - or becoming friends with them) Recently, one of my exes even hit on her, and all she did was make a joke back to him - only stopping texting him once I explicity asked her to. These things hurt me as to me, it seems like a no-brainer to not do them, as I would never do them to her, but she will only stop if I directly tell her to stop, which I don't like to do, but often have to as I feel if I don't, my resentment will only grow. I don't think they're unreasonable things to ask from her, because these people aren't necessarily close friends with her, and in every case, she's never even met them. Regardless, these things really hurt me. It's gotten to a point where everytime she posts something on social media, or acts in certain ways - things that never used to bother me - make me snarl or roll my eyes in annoyance. And everytime, I feel like such a horrible person. I love her so much, and she tries so hard to be such a good friend to me, and she really is. I don't want to resent her for the few mistakes that she makes. But, I can't help but feel my cycle of finding a great friend, then suddenly hating them is repeating.

stitch_feels_sad A girl at school is giving me a hard time!!!
  • replies: 6

This girl at school, year 11, absolutely hates me, year 8, she holds a grudge cause I went off with other friends and because she hated my sister. She tried to turn everyone against and thinks she the boss of the friend group. This week I’ve been act... View more

This girl at school, year 11, absolutely hates me, year 8, she holds a grudge cause I went off with other friends and because she hated my sister. She tried to turn everyone against and thinks she the boss of the friend group. This week I’ve been acting out at school cause she came back from having covid and it was nice and peaceful. This week she also stalked my tiktok account and talked bad about me in the comments of one of MY videos. What should I do about her?

AW-1972 Drama within my friend group makes me stressed.
  • replies: 4

Hello everyone. My friend group has heaps of drama and its making me overwhelmed and stressed. My friend group consists of about 7 people and they all are in on things without me and attack me for no reason, they make me feel like a outsider. They ge... View more

Hello everyone. My friend group has heaps of drama and its making me overwhelmed and stressed. My friend group consists of about 7 people and they all are in on things without me and attack me for no reason, they make me feel like a outsider. They get angry and start fights over me not liking a video game. They also just say some really rude things to me and my other friends. I just want to keep my relationships and don't want the fights and drama. I love my friends but I don't have the emotional capacity and time to deal with all of this. It makes me so stressed and anxious.

Trish2 I'm unfulfilled in life
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone! It's been a long time since I last posted on here but I think I've been feeling particularly lonely in an area that I think a lot of us can relate to possibly. I've been dealing with the loss of a relationship that meant a lot to me for ... View more

Hi everyone! It's been a long time since I last posted on here but I think I've been feeling particularly lonely in an area that I think a lot of us can relate to possibly. I've been dealing with the loss of a relationship that meant a lot to me for 9 months or so now and although there's been some slight progress with dealing with that pain, it still comes and goes and I can't get it out of my head. I feel this is taking way longer than it should if I'm being honest. As a result, I've been missing that connection in life that made me genuinely happy for a while, which was having someone to hug/cuddle, someone to tell your most intimate details to and all that sort of stuff. I definitely have my friends and I'm even lucky to have a friend I've known since forever, but I don't feel comfortable having that sort of relationship with them where I can talk about how I feel or just those deeper conversations as they're not the type of people that do or enjoy those things which makes me feel even worse and I feel stuck. I don't feel like meeting anyone new either as I'm not ready for it yet and I feel like it's hard to find even platonic friendships these days. Does anyone have any good tips or advice for dealing with a situation like this or feeling better about it? I feel so stuck and I have no one to share that side of me with and it makes me so sad. I also used to live with my pets that would cuddle me too so losing that as well really adds to the pain.

BeautifulHorse I'm homesick and lonely and I feel like I can't tell anyone
  • replies: 3

I've recently 'moved' in with my aunt for a little while, and I miss home. It's very organised and more strict here, I'm not allowed to eat in the lounge room for example, and everything is really... different. And I have to put up with my uncle, who... View more

I've recently 'moved' in with my aunt for a little while, and I miss home. It's very organised and more strict here, I'm not allowed to eat in the lounge room for example, and everything is really... different. And I have to put up with my uncle, who is either annoying or scary. I feel like I'm letting down my guard too much, because when I trust someone they always somehow bite me back. I don't know what to do because they try to be really nice, and it would feel nasty to say anything against that. Sometimes I want to cry, but I don't because I don't want anyone to know I'm upset. I'm not sure if anyone else feels like this and I don't know what to do. It's not healthy to let these sorts of things linger, but I don't really have anyone I feel safe talking to and I can't get out alone to call someone to just talk to.

OceanPhoenix General Venting
  • replies: 3

So recently I have not done any work related to school in a week and I'm always stuck in bed. It has dawned on me multiple times that I may be very unmotivated but throughout the years I was told I was lazy so I struggle to tell the difference. I'm s... View more

So recently I have not done any work related to school in a week and I'm always stuck in bed. It has dawned on me multiple times that I may be very unmotivated but throughout the years I was told I was lazy so I struggle to tell the difference. I'm scared that this may persist and eventually, it may lead to me not eating frequently or not attending social gatherings etc. It's also really hard for me to communicate with others I often keep everything bottled up and my whole life I despised leaning on others. To be honest I don't even know why I'm here...Maybe a stranger's advice holds some worth? Maybe to vent? I don't know. I guess I was wondering if anyone out there struggles with differentiating laziness and lack of motivation or being "burnt out" as I do. Also recently I feel rather lonely despite being surrounded by others constantly and more tired than usual. Some days I feel like I'm not heard or no one pays attention to me when I'm usually okay with not being in the center of attention. Lastly, I have been very irritable and I just don't know why as the smallest things set me off whether it's with friends or family. Well, that will be all for now I suppose. Thank you for listening to my venting.

Yes And No I Feel Like I Don't Deserve to be Depressed
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone, I have no idea if anybody is going to see this, but I've realised I need help. Sorry in advance if this seems more like a way to get this off of my chest instead of a cry for help or something. My life seems to be ideal, a fair few frien... View more

Hi Everyone, I have no idea if anybody is going to see this, but I've realised I need help. Sorry in advance if this seems more like a way to get this off of my chest instead of a cry for help or something. My life seems to be ideal, a fair few friends, loving parents, top grades at school, but I can't help but hate myself. I was born with a rare genetic condition which effects my appearance in a really negative way, and it makes me feel like I can never be as good as anyone else. I feel like I'll never be loved because of the way I was born, everyone around me is in a stable long term relationship, and I've never experienced the feeling of somebody outside of my family loving me. Everyone I've ever thought I loved has either left or is in a long lasting relationship with a person who's better than me. I feel trapped, like there is nobody I know who I can talk to, I don't bring it up with my parents because even if I bring up something minor I get back the standard "people have it so much worse than you, you should feel lucky that you're as privileged as you are". I have no friends who I can talk to because they either aren't people I trust with my insecurities, or they're going through something so much worse than I am that it would sound more like a complaint than a genuine attempt to get help. I've been considering suicide but I know that I'm too much of a coward to actually go through with it. And through all of this I'm thinking that I'm only doing this for attention, because I don't even have it half as bad as everyone else does, I'm angry with myself for being sad because I know that there are people who are going through worse than I am, and that I can only be thinking these things because everyone else is. Every time I do try to say something people will ask me if I'm OK and even if I say no I don't want to talk about it because I don't want to make them feel worse because they have to bear my problems as well. Somebody I know has attempted suicide on multiple occasions and I fear for her life because I feel like I'm not doing enough to help her, but I can't help her because I don't know how. I'm sorry if this post feels like a mess, it's the first time I've made an effort to reach out to the wider community about my problems, Thanks for reading this, YAN.

Scotty02 Is this normal? Potential health anxiety
  • replies: 3

G’day guys Over a month ago now I woke up one morning feeling pretty serious brain fog (couldn’t concentrate, poor memory and feeling generally ‘off’). This brain fog coincided with never before experienced panic attacks which lasted anywhere between... View more

G’day guys Over a month ago now I woke up one morning feeling pretty serious brain fog (couldn’t concentrate, poor memory and feeling generally ‘off’). This brain fog coincided with never before experienced panic attacks which lasted anywhere between 20-30mins. I am 19 and have never had an issue with my mental health, and now I find myself slowly getting ‘worse’. I constantly hyper-fixate over physical and mental symptoms that I display, and manifest a reason that it could be the start or early onset of something sinister. For example: I go into panic attacks thinking that I’m developing bipolar or schizophrenia, despite not showing any real symptoms. I have begun seeing a psychologist 3 weeks ago to address some issues at home (minor) and started taking antidepressants 4 days ago. As stated, this is all completely new and it’s incredibly frightening. I find it difficult to fall asleep at night, fatigued and constant brain fog. Sometimes I stand up and feel dizzy and have frequent panic attacks, often twice in a day. I spend the whole day worrying that I have a brain tumour or as mentioned, another more chronic mental illness. I’m not sure if that’s how these illnesses start, or if I have health anxiety or even slight OCD. Wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience, wherein symptoms appeared overnight and gradually got worse. Not sure if a formal diagnosis would be beneficial, as I feel the root of my problem is the constant anxiety/ stress that I am developing a ‘chronic’ mental illness. thank you in advance.

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