Young people

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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Dani2696 Screaming on the inside
  • replies: 2

Hi, this js my first post I just really want to vent. Everyone thinks I’m happy and in love but inside I am so angry, hurt and resentful all the time! I have been with my bf for almost 3 years now and there was a time where he go so drunk and sent me... View more

Hi, this js my first post I just really want to vent. Everyone thinks I’m happy and in love but inside I am so angry, hurt and resentful all the time! I have been with my bf for almost 3 years now and there was a time where he go so drunk and sent messages to another woman. He told me those messages were for me and I forgave him and stayed with him even though I don’t fully believe him. Since then I have major trust issues with both cheating and alcohol. He doesn’t seem to see the issue he has with alcohol but he can’t control his drinking and I am pertrified that he will hurt me again. I Feel he is still cheating on me because I have found messages and phone calls. I know I should leave him but I stay because I am still so in love with him and he is great at acting like we are a great strong couple so in love. At times I just want to shout for everyone to hear me. Obviously I can’t do that so I speak to myself almost all the time. I scream and tell myself things that I know I shouldn’t say to myself but the pain inside of me is too strong and overpowers the logical part of me. I sometimes think about floating away and have created an image of myself in my head which I take out my frustrations on by imagining it. I feel so alone and I want to shake him for hurting me this way. I was so happy before he came into my life. Now I am just full of anger and resentment especially because he lives his life showing everyone how great he is and how happy he is. We have a big age gap and I don’t know if it has anything to do with the resentment I feel. Sometimes I think it does because I am angry that he could experience so many things in life that I won’t ever get to do. I cry a lot and get headaches. I wish I could just forget about things but I see and remember things so clearly. Thank you for taking the time to read my post.

Miag17 Dealing with stress, anxiety and trouble moving forward
  • replies: 1

Hi all, i am new here and just need some advice on how I am feeling. This year has probably been one of the best years of my life. I accomplished so much, put myself out of my comfort zone and made new friends in/out of school. I grew in confidence a... View more

Hi all, i am new here and just need some advice on how I am feeling. This year has probably been one of the best years of my life. I accomplished so much, put myself out of my comfort zone and made new friends in/out of school. I grew in confidence and learnt so many new things. My life was amazing until my first year 12 exam hit on November, I didn’t do it to the best of my ability because for the past 3 weeks before the exam I burnt myself out so bad. I messed up the exam, but right now I am looking at it as a learning lesson for year 12 next year. anyway, since that day, I have been struggling on and off with feeling anxious 75% of the time, mostly when I am at home and have nothing to do. I had some trouble concentrating on my work after the exam and just felt more down than I have felt before. Sometimes it goes away for a couple of days than comes back for a day or two. nowadays, I am on holidays and I have never felt this low in my life. I don’t even know if I have anxiety or depression, but I have had trouble sleeping this past week, I have trouble being independent, and just sitting on my own because I am so prone to catastrophizing how I feel. I worry a lot and don’t know what to do when I am in that state, constantly feeding onto those negative thoughts. i know that this is only temporary, and I know that there are a few reasons why I have been feeling this way: - loads of stress, especially throughout my exam period, don’t know how to deal with it - lack of self care. I literally did so much this year, was so busy every single weekend, went on camps during holidays where I was meant to relax. I forgot to take care of myself - my favourite teacher at school leaving for another school. She helped me more than anyone could this year, she’s my role model and she knows that her leaving has made me feel scared of next year. Anyway, I have got a mental health plan and went to headspace to get my sh*t together, because I want to stop feeling so low. I have the support of my family and my friends. my question is, how do I get motivation to keep going, what strategies can I use to get better sleep, and have you felt something similar to this? Thank you all so much, I’m so glad I found this space to share how I am feeling.

SarahSarah44 Can telling your partner that you have depression mend your relationship?
  • replies: 8

I few days before I got told I had depression and anxiety I had a massive fight with my boyfriend of almost 5 years, that has made him question if we can get out of this cycle of having a massive fight that is so messy that we break up. We have broke... View more

I few days before I got told I had depression and anxiety I had a massive fight with my boyfriend of almost 5 years, that has made him question if we can get out of this cycle of having a massive fight that is so messy that we break up. We have broken up before because of this... I never realised there was something wrong until my doctor asked me if I had feelings of depression and aniexty and it all came flooding out as she asked me more questions (I was at the doctors because my period as been going for weeks and I’ve gained a lot of weight even though I excerise) the best way I could discribe it is that I lost a part of myself, my light is gone, I just feel darkness all the time. I think my relationship is always on the verge of ending because I feel so crap. I always thought this feeling was me holding on to the pain of the last break up. I was picking fights with boyfriend all the time and it was causing a lot of problems But there was a happy 8 months before all this happened. I’ve spoken to him since visiting the doctor and told him everything that is happening. He said he needs time to work out what he wants So my question is? Could we get past this? Is me finding out what contributed to me loosing the best parts of me going to help rebuild our relationship? Or do you think I should expect the worse? I’m so detremend to get better, not for my relationship, but for me, because I don’t want to be my mother (my mother suffers from depression, but refuses to excerise or any self help excerises)

Gingerbread88 Being a Strong Partner for my depressed boyfriend
  • replies: 2

Hi Everyone, I am on here because I am really struggling with being the rock for my bf during this tough time. my bf has had a seriously tough upbringing, his dad left him as a young boy, had a terrible ex gf who cheated on him after a long period of... View more

Hi Everyone, I am on here because I am really struggling with being the rock for my bf during this tough time. my bf has had a seriously tough upbringing, his dad left him as a young boy, had a terrible ex gf who cheated on him after a long period of time leaving him broke at the end of it all as he had to sell up all the assets. he has such obstacles in life, and had been through alot of abandonment through his life. 1 year into our 2 year relationship he told me about the face that he may be suffering from depression. i have tried to be there for him, i love him so much and I want and will be there for him but his condition has worsened lately He has started taking medication which has had some side effects. he tells me he likes “silent time” so he told me not be around all the time. iunderstand how you would like to be alone sometimes but It makes me feel so helpless, unwanted and uneeded. When I come home now we barely even speak. i just feel like im not required, unneeded and unloved. I feel like he only kisses me out of routine and not because he wants to. He stopped showing me affection about 1 year ago i am trying to be so strong for him, reminding myself that it is because of his condition, that I need to be strong ans supportive for him and he needs to see me happy and supportive, but now I am left in a position of feeling stuck, unloved, helpless and alone. i dont want to stress him out anymore, but I just dont know if I could carry on like this. Its always a constant battle in my own head between whether it really is the condition or he just no longer loves me anyone else experienced this and can give some advice?

xhomeostasisx CBF looking for work. Anyone else?
  • replies: 1

It all seems so meaningless. I’m on a pension but wish I found something that I want to work towards enough to get off it. Then again I have dreams, but need to sort out this friggen debilitating anxiety. I’m too afraid to go to therapy. I’ve got lik... View more

It all seems so meaningless. I’m on a pension but wish I found something that I want to work towards enough to get off it. Then again I have dreams, but need to sort out this friggen debilitating anxiety. I’m too afraid to go to therapy. I’ve got like no real job references at 21 even though I’ve done volunteering and a little bit of work before I was 18 lol. You?

SANsan Can’t hold a job
  • replies: 2

Recently, I have been struggling to hold a job. I get really anxious and second guess myself every time I have to achieve a task. I have been fired before and have quit because I realised I was being fired from another job. I haven’t told anyone what... View more

Recently, I have been struggling to hold a job. I get really anxious and second guess myself every time I have to achieve a task. I have been fired before and have quit because I realised I was being fired from another job. I haven’t told anyone what has really happened and made an excuse when someone asks why I don’t work at places anymore. Recently, I have gotten a Christmas casual job and I feel like I am going down the same road. I am graduating this year and don’t think I will have to confidence to even consider doing the job that I studied so hard for. I feel like I’m the only one out of all my friends and family that struggle to learn new things and never can flourish in a job. Just wondering if there was anyone else like this.

hairclip Young adults please help...
  • replies: 5

I've been having a hard time looking for a new job. The current one has left me mental scars...my manager was abusive. They would "playfully" hit me, curse at me, yell at me when I've done something wrong (but never provided the training). I just tho... View more

I've been having a hard time looking for a new job. The current one has left me mental scars...my manager was abusive. They would "playfully" hit me, curse at me, yell at me when I've done something wrong (but never provided the training). I just thought I was bad and I toughened it out for a few months. Now I hate people because of them. I find it so hard to talk to people and so ashamed. Not only is it a low-end disrespectful job...it wasn't what I wanted for myself. I can't help but to stay numb, I am so numb now it's difficult to break out. I would have random breakdowns and often bad. If I try to take a scheduled day off I would be told I'm ungrateful of this job and I am not allowed. I desperately want to quit but I can't find another job even though I've been looking for a year now, are there any tips on getting hired?? I'm so numb to a point I don't even cry anymore when I do have emotions they are hard to control and often toxic. Everyone has been telling me to quit but I know for sure I won't get a job if I quit. Please help, I've tried everything...I just feel like a failure. I just want to disappear.

Whitepoppy61 Feeling like an outsider in high school
  • replies: 6

Hello, I'm new. I'm a year 11 girl and I feel like I don't belong in my high school. If I just disappeared, no one would care. I thought by studying hard in school, I could ignore it. Unfortunately, it has been affecting me recently and I'm starting ... View more

Hello, I'm new. I'm a year 11 girl and I feel like I don't belong in my high school. If I just disappeared, no one would care. I thought by studying hard in school, I could ignore it. Unfortunately, it has been affecting me recently and I'm starting to lose my motivation to study because of my lack of friends. I didn't always feel like this. Since year 7, I have been seen as the awkward and quiet girl so I never got far in forming friendships. Heck, people always questioned me about it and made me feel like being quiet is the worst trait. Fortunately, a group of friends accepted me for who I am Then, friendship problems happened. My group hated me and started talking behind my back in a very bad way. I was kept around just so they can leech off schoolwork and borrow money. This shattered me. I thought this was the one friendship group who could accept me no matter what, but learning they hated me all along? My self-esteem was lowered even further to nothing. If my "close" friends didn't accept me, then who would? I left. I have no stable friendship group now. I actually tried hanging in other groups but I only felt out of place. I have found one true friend, but I don't want to burden him. He is popular and has other friends and by hanging out with him all the time, I am scared I will make him lose his friends. I already messed up before and I don't want to again. Every day when he hangs with his friends, I am reminded of how I don't have many friends at all. Sure, I have a few acquaintances but I don't know them personally. I just can't fit into any kind of cliques no matter what. Everyone finds me awkward, so I don't have a chance to befriend people easily. It seems no one likes talking to awkward, quiet people. It's difficult to talk to other girls because my interests differ from their ones greatly (I like video games and cartoons rather than k-pop.) Sadly, I lost interest in my own hobbies since I started feeling down. I befriend boys effortlessly yet I'm afraid of being labelled for only having male friends (it was one of the things the old friendship group gossiped about). I am more comfortable talking to people online or even outside of my school; at least no one can judge me based on how they see me before we even talked. I heard university is better, and I'm looking forward to escaping and start afresh. But for now, I can't cope with this feeling any longer and I don't want it to damage me further. Thank you for hearing me out.

Odette genetic predisposition + childhood trauma makes for the 'perfect' storm!
  • replies: 5

I've been struggling with anxiety & other mental health issues for as long as I can remember, genetic predisposition + childhood trauma makes for the 'perfect' storm! It destroyed my entire school career, I had pretty good grades but my attendance wa... View more

I've been struggling with anxiety & other mental health issues for as long as I can remember, genetic predisposition + childhood trauma makes for the 'perfect' storm! It destroyed my entire school career, I had pretty good grades but my attendance was garbage & I ended up being expelled in year 11 & for the past 3 years I've been doing pretty much nothing. I do have goals and things I wish I could be doing but my mental health always gets in the way! I can't make or answer phone calls (even talking to strangers via email makes me sweat), I can't go to certain places, the past two job trials I've had have ended in panic attacks (all of the classic symptoms with the added 'bonus' of what I can only describe as hallucinations) & this combined with depression, an eating disorder & typical family drama make for quite a trying time. I've been in and out of 'treatment' for 5 years however anxiety has prevented me from consistently attending appointments and to be quite honest the place where I was going made me feel like a science experiment (& also violated my confidentially when I was never in any danger but that's a whole other story!). More recently I went to my GP and asked for a referral to somewhere that wasn't where I was previously going but she said she didn't know any other bulk billing practices and I was told to "just google it!". Well 3 months later and I still haven't gotten anywhere, no where bulk bills & I simply cant afford to pay for sessions even with the rebate (I'm on centerlink youth allowance I get $250 a fortnight & usually only have about $80-$100 left after essential expenses). I'm kinda at my wits end here, I don't know what to do? I want to be better but it seems even in this country you have to pay to get proper treatment

Ashely My life has been bad lately
  • replies: 19

I was just at school,I didn’t think that I was going to last the day

I was just at school,I didn’t think that I was going to last the day